Don't Leave Yet: How My Mother's Alzheimer's Opened My Heart

By: Constance Hanstedt

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Synopsis: As a young girl in the Midwest, Constance Hanstedt was consumed by fear—of her parents, especially her disapproving mother, Virginia; of social situations; and of people in general. Unable to connect with those around her, she embraced perfectionism as a substitute for love. Raising her own family eased some of Hanstedt&’s self-doubt. But even as an adult she remained guarded around her mother, avoiding conflict at all costs. Still, when Virginia developed Alzheimer&’s, Hanstedt did what the perfect daughter she&’d always struggled to be would do: she returned to the Midwestern town where she was raised to help care for a mother who could no longer care for herself. In Don&’t Leave Yet, Hanstedt recounts her journey toward facing her fears and rising above the past; her mother&’s unrelenting bitterness regarding life, even as she loses memories of it; and her unexpected discovery of an emotion that reaches beyond familial duty: compassion.