- Table View
- List View
Dog Breath! The Horrible Trouble With Hally Tosis
by Dav Pilkey"Hold your nose! Here comes the dog with the worst breath in the world! When no one can stand the horrible breath of HallyTosis for one more minute, the Tosis children must find a way to cure it or else Hally will be given away. They just about give up until one night, when HallyTosis puts her very bad problem to very good use ..." Bookshare also offers this book in Spanish.
Cheapskates
by Charlie StellaReese Waters is barely a day out of Fishkill Penitentiary before his world is spinning crazily. He wants only to do the right thing, he just doesn't expect the right thing to entail $50,000 in cash.
Mr. Bump
by Roger HargreavesMr. Bump is always getting hurt and causing trouble. What good is he? One day, after a bunch of misshaps, he figures out the perfect job. Contains picture descriptions.
The Bachelor Home Companion: A Practical Guide to Keeping House Like a Pig
by P. J. O'Rourke"I always wanted to be a bachelor when I grew up. My friends may have had fantasies about raking the yard, seeing their loved ones in pin curlers and cleaning the garage on Sundays, but not me. I saw myself at thirty-eight lounging around a penthouse in a brocade smoking jacket. Vivaldi would be playing on the stereo. I'd sip brandy from a snifter the size of a fish tank and leaf through an address book full of R-rated phone numbers. ..." Always with tongue firmly in cheek, the author points out the trouble, for bachelors, with laundromats, cooking, shopping and everything else that goes along with managing a house. "Bachelor cooking is a matter of attitude. If you think of it as setting fire to things and making a mess, it's fun. It's not so much fun if you think of it as dinner. Fortunately, baloney, cheeseburgers, beer, and potato-chip dip provide all the daily nutrients bachelors are known to require. I mean, I hope they do."
Mr. Impossible
by Roger HargreavesCan you jump over a house? Mr. Impossible can! he can do some other impossible things too! Find out what they are and what happens when he goes to school with William. Contains picture descriptions. Other books by Roger Hargreaves are available from Bookshare. This file should make an excellent embossed braille copy.
101 Ways to Bug Your Parents
by Lee WardlawFrom the cover When his parents call off the family vacation and enroll their son in a creative writing class instead, twelve-year-old Steve comes up with a wacky moneymaking project.
Out to Pasture: But Not over the Hill
by Effie Leland WilderThis charming novel stars Hattie McNair, an inveterate journal-keeper and eavesdropper extraordinaire. Hattie's humor and indomitable spirit make Out to Pasture an amusing and heartwarming look at the often-avoided topic of aging. Hattie lives in FairAcres Home, a retirement community in South Carolina. Over dinner one night, Hattie overhears a fellow resident planning her own funeral-- complete with a caterer so her daughter-in-law's potted meat pate doesn't make the funeral goers sorry they came! Hattie begins her journal the same evening to capture the whole absurd scene--and so begins the story of Hattie's experiences "out to pasture."
New Rules: Polite Musings from a Timid Observer
by Bill MaherNo one is safe from Maher's scathing, acerbic humor in this hilarious collection of new rules of life.
On Beauty: A Novel
by Zadie SmithA look at family life, marriage, the collision of the personal and political, and an honest look at people's self-deceptions.
It's That Time Again! The New Stories of Old-Time Radio
by Ben OhmartNEW stories of old-time radio, written by today's most knowledgable OTR authors and fans.
The Thin Pink Line
by Lauren Baratz-LogstedA woman longs for the warm and fuzzy world of pregnancy, so she fakes one of her own
Ricky Ricotta's Mighty Robot vs. The Stupid Stinkbugs from Saturn
by Dav PilkeyA smelly space monster lands in Squeakyville and kidnaps Lucy, but Ricky has a big plan to get out of this stinky situation.
The Truth (with jokes)
by Al FrankenFranken on Iraq, gay marriage, Bill Frist diagnosing Terri Schiavo, Bush's 9/11 Bait and Switch, moral values, the Social Security crisis and more
M*A*S*H Goes to London
by Richard Hooker William E. ButterworthFurther misadventures of Trapper John, Hot Lips Houlihan and Hawkeye Pierce, only this time in Merry Old England.
The Book of Bebb
by Frederick BuechnerIncludes: Open Heart, Love Feast, Treasure Hunt, Book of Bebb.
The Benchley Roundup: A Selection by Nathaniel Benchley of His Favorites
by Robert Benchley Nathaniel BenchleyForeword ONE time, during the recent war, an Air Force sergeant accosted Robert Benchley in a bar and, with little or no preamble, said, "I might as well tell you that I don't like your work." Benchley replied that he had moments of doubt himself, and the sergeant then explained that he had hitched a ride from Africa to Italy on a cargo plane, and that the only available sleeping space had been on bags that were full of overseas editions of Benchley's books. By the time they passed Sicily, the man said, he was so stiff and sore that he hoped never to hear the name Benchley again. "Try it yourself sometime," he concluded. "That stuff isn't funny when you have to sleep on it." In somewhat the same way, I would suggest that The Benchley Roundup be read piecemeal rather than in one lump-picked up and put down as though you were waiting for a telephone call, or for guests to arrive-because, after all, the pieces had their original appeal as separate entities. In making my selection from about a thousand previously published pieces, I read in fits and starts over a long period of time. Many people have tried to analyze Robert Benchley's particular form of humor, and I would be the last one to add my tiny voice to that of the throng, because I don't think it can be analyzed. It is sometimes mad, sometimes penetrating, and sometimes based on nothing more than word associations, and the only generalization that can be made with any degree of certainty is that it is different- or, if you will, unique. So let's just leave it that the humorous pieces collected here, written between 1915 and 1945, are those which seem to stand up best over the years. There were some that were much admired when they first appeared, but were based on premises that now seem a little soft; others were glorious in part but evaporated when taken as a whole; and all these have been left out in an attempt to select the most durable. Another compiler might have picked an entirely different group, but that would have been his worry. These are the ones that I like best, and beyond that there isn't much more I ought to say. -Nathaniel Benchley
Tales from the Dyke Side
by Jorjet HarperFrom the Table of Contents: Breakfast Cereal Monogamy Sex in monogamous relationships has a finite shelf life. If the Shoe Fits Was Cinderella a broom-closet Lesbian? Northern Exposure Is Santa Claus a very special fairy? Animal Crackers Coming out to mom-a long process. Going by the Book Halloween costumes and gays in the Bible. When reading this book, be prepared to laugh--out loud--and to think; to ponder and to enjoy.
Belly Laughs from Bikini Bottom
by Holly KowittWhoop it up with SpongeBob SquarePants and his friends in this book of side-splitting sillies. It's sure to buoy even the briniest blowhards!
Awesome Dinosaur Jokes for Kids
by Bob PhillipsDinosaur knock, knock jokes; ding-a-ling dinsoaur jokes; woolly mammoth jokes; and dignified, delightful, dashing, dinky and dangerous dinosaur jokes
When Will Jesus Bring the Pork Chops?
by George CarlinA riotous journey through the mind of one of America's premier comic observers.
Dr. Burns' Prescription for Happiness
by George BurnsGeorge Burns muses on what happiness is, and gives every remedy he's acquired for tickling your funny bone.
Now!
by M. RaymondThis book presents, in modern terminology, "the doctrine of Abandonment - and the doctrine of the Mystical Body of Christ for the individual man - be he considered "ordinary" or "extraordinary."
How Many Zen Buddhists Does It Take to Screw in a Light Bulb?
by Matt Freedman Paul HoffmanExamples of the humor craze of the 1980s - the light bulb joke!