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Everything is Wrong with You: The Modern Woman's Guide to Finding Self-Confidence Through Self-Loathing
by Wendy MolyneuxPretend advice about beauty, fashion and relationships for women who are pretending to care about that stuff. While other self-help books might tell you that something is wrong with you, this book is here to tell you that everything is wrong with you. In your quest for perfection, are there things you've forgotten to worry about? Like: Are your toes weird? I'm not saying they are, but are they? What if you think you are thin, but you actually have a vision disorder that just makes you see yourself as thin when, in fact, you are totally not thin? Think about it! What if whenever you go out of town your boyfriend has crazy orgies at your house? And what if all your best friends come to those orgies? Of course I can't prove it, but can you disprove it? Remember, if you were OK, there wouldn't be so many books and magazines out there devoted to helping you get prettier and be more stylish. I mean, if you think that publishers are just in it for the money, then you definitely have trust issues! How can you solve them? Please purchase this book to find out. On the other hand, you could just walk out of here without this book, thinking that you are great just the way you are . . . and arrive home to find that your husband has left you because of your weird toes. Good luck.
The Everything Kids': Joke Book
by Michael DahlThe Everything "RM" Kids' series is being relaunched at a phenomenal new price! They're the same great quality you've come to expect, still packed with tons of activities and puzzles in two-color -- now with a lower price that everyone can appreciate!Stock up on these perennial bestsellers that keep your kids active and engaged. The wide scope of subject material -- from jokes to science experiments -- appeals to kids all across the country. And parents and teachers love that the books provide responsible, educational information, while being so much fun that the kids love learning!From discovering why a sunset is red, to becoming a young entrepreneur, to learning new jokes to keep the whole family laughing, kids really love these Everything "RM" Kids' books!
The Everything Kids' Gross Jokes Book
by Aileen WeintraubIf you're up for some side-splitting and stomach-churning laughs, grab The Everything Kids' Gross Jokes Book as fast as you can! It's packed with hundreds of one-liners and knock-knocks to make you turn green! Make your way through sick sections such as: The Gross-Store; There's Grime in My Slime!; Everybody Oozes; Who Among Us Is a Fungus?; Dead Fly Pie; and many more! Chock full of puzzles, games, and activities, The Everything Kids' Gross Jokes Book scores a perfect 10 on the Gross-o-meter!
The Everything Kids' Joke Book
by Michael DahlKids love to tell jokes, and with The Everything Kids' Joke Book, they'll never be at a loss for a good one. Inside, they'll learn: the world's seven best limericks; monster jokes; nickname games; cowboy jokes; light bulb jokes; knock-knock jokes; and hundreds more! And if they ever stop laughing, they can take a humor quiz to see how strong their funny bone really is! Not only does The Everything Kids' Joke Book provide kids with an endless supply of good clean jokes, but it also offers tips on how to tell jokes, how to deliver a punch line, and how to get laughs from family and friends!
The Everything Kids' Joke Book: Side-Splitting, Rib-Tickling Fun
by Michael DahlA Simon & Schuster eBook. Simon & Schuster has a great book for every reader.
Everything Nice
by Ellen ShanmanSuper-slick, super-independent, Michaela “Mike” Edwards is a lady going places. Or so she thinks. Once unexpectedly fired, her career as a young advertising hot-shot is over just like that. Before long she’s doing the unimaginable: moving back in with her widowed father to help make those pesky ends meet - it’s clear she needs to rethink her life. Maybe she should start with trying to unravel those complicated feelings she’s been having about her best guy pal, Aussie journalist Gunther...?
Everything Reminds Me of Something: Advice, Answers...but No Apologies
by Adam CarollaAs seen on Hannity! The bestselling comedian returns to respond and rant on real questions about life and love, careers and cars, and everything else from fans and famous friends.Ever wonder what you would say or do if you didn&’t give a f**k? Adam Carolla can tell you. In his sixth book, the comedian, podcaster, and provocateur does what he does best—doles out advice and opinions with utter disregard for our politically correct, self-righteous, virtue signaling, woke times. Thanks to decades of hosting MTV and radio&’s Loveline, his Guinness World Record–breaking podcast and touring the stand-up circuit, no one in comedy is as gifted at thinking on their feet. Taking actual questions from his fans—and even some celebrity friends, including Ray Romano, Maria Menounos, and Judd Apatow—Adam dishes out hilarious rants, unpredictable tangents, brilliant inventions, sage advice, and controversial opinions in a way only a self-proclaimed asshole can.
Everything That Glitters is Guy! (Pictureback(R))
by Rachel ChlebowskiTrolls—the most magical creatures with the wildest hair—get ready to sparkle in this colorful new storybook!From the makers of Shrek, DreamWorks Trolls is a hair-raising comedy filled with unbelievable adventure, incredible music, and Trolls—the joyous creatures with crazy, colorful, magical hair! Girls and boys ages 4 to 6 will love following the adventures of Poppy, Branch, and their friends as they embark on a series of adventures that take them far beyond the only world they have ever known!
Everything You Need to Know When You Are 8 (Everything You Need To Know Ser.)
by Kirsten MillerWhat’s the best gift for a kid who’s turned eight? Everything they need to know! Eight is a banner year in every kid’s life. It’s when they’re finally granted “big kid” status. That means more freedom and responsibility. It also means there’s a ton of stuff to learn, and some of it’s pretty important. Inside this hilarious handbook is the information kids need to make eight one of the best years of their lives—from the fun (How to Win Halloween), to the serious (How to Get Germs Before They Get You) and the downright disgusting (How to Make Boogers You Can Eat).
Everything You Need to Know When You Are 9 (Everything You Need To Know Ser.)
by Kirsten MillerConquer age nine with the earth-shattering secrets and must-know tips they won’t teach you in school—from the New York Times-bestselling author.Nine is an awesome age. One of the best! You finally start to get the respect you deserve, but you still get to enjoy being a kid. Before kids are ready for more independence, there’s a lot they need to know. This handbook brings together the hilarious (How to Disguise Your Appearance), the helpful (How to Keep Your Head Bug-Free) and the potentially lifesaving (How to Save Someone Who’s Choking) to help kids enjoy every second of year number nine! “These books are the best. Every kid should have them.” —Jason Segel, actor and coauthor of the Nightmares! series
Everything You Want to Know about Jesus
by Ben Shaw Peter DowneyDespite the wealth of information we have about Jesus through books and the arts, to many, he has become a bland religious cardboard cut-out who speaks in pious cliches. This engaging, readable and sometimes even humorous look at the life of Jesus is a great eye-opener for someone who's new to Jesus or for anyone who wants a fresh look.
Everything's Archie Vol. 1 (Archie Comics Presents)
by Archie SuperstarsEVERYTHING'S ARCHIE VOL. 1 is the first of a chronological collection of titles featuring the classic series. This is presented in the new higher-end format of Archie Comics Presents, which offers 200+ pages at a value while taking a design cue from successful all-ages graphic novels.Back in the days of Saturday morning cartoons, The Archies ruled both TV and radio. While "Sugar, Sugar" was on the airwaves, you could also read the band's adventures in this classic series -- reprinted here again for fans young and old alike!
Everything's Archie Vol. 2 (Archie Comics Presents #2)
by Archie SuperstarsEVERYTHING'S ARCHIE VOL. 2 is the second of a chronological collection of titles featuring the classic series. This is presented in the new higher-end format of Archie Comics Presents, which offers 200+ pages at a value while taking a design cue from successful all-ages graphic novels.Back in the days of Saturday morning cartoons, The Archies ruled both TV and radio. While "Sugar, Sugar" was on the airwaves, you could also read the band's adventures in this classic series -- reprinted here again for fans young and old alike!
Everything's Trash, But It's Okay
by Phoebe Robinson Ilana GlazerEntertainment Weekly's Fall 2018's 25 Must-ReadsEssence's Fall 2018 Guide to All Things FunnyBustle's 18 New Nonfiction Books to Know in October"Robinson offers deft cultural criticism and hilarious personal anecdotes that will make readers laugh, cringe, and cry. Everything may indeed be trash but writing like this reminds us that we're gonna make it through all the terrible things with honesty, laughter, and faith."--Roxane Gay, New York Times bestselling authorNew York Times bestselling author and star of 2 Dope Queens Phoebe Robinson is back with a new, hilarious, and timely essay collection on gender, race, dating, and the dumpster fire that is our world.Written in her trademark unfiltered and witty style, Robinson's latest collection is a call to arms. Outfitted with on-point pop culture references, these essays tackle a wide range of topics: giving feminism a tough-love talk on intersectionality, telling society's beauty standards to kick rocks, and calling foul on our culture's obsession with work. Robinson also gets personal, exploring money problems she's hidden from her parents, how dating is mainly a warmed-over bowl of hot mess, and definitely most important, meeting Bono not once, but twice. She's struggled with being a woman with a political mind and a woman with an ever-changing jeans size. She knows about trash because she sees it every day--and because she's seen roughly one hundred thousand hours of reality TV and zero hours of Schindler's List.With the intimate voice of a new best friend, Everything's Trash, But It's Okay is a candid perspective for a generation that has had the rug pulled out from under it too many times to count.
Everything's Wrong!: A Bear, a Hare, and Trouble Everywhere (A Bear and Hare Book)
by Jory JohnFrom #1 New York Times–bestselling author of The Bad Seed, Jory John, and the #1 New York Times-bestselling illustrator of Buffalo Fluffalo, Erin Kraan, comes a meaningful yet utterly hilarious tale about two best friends making the best out of a bad day.It’ll surely be a no-hassle, stress-free, easy-peasy kind of day . . . Best friends Jeff and Anders start the day with the best of intentions, but before long, everything goes haywire. From power outages, to spilled breakfasts, to missing socks, a series of irritating incidents sends the bear-and-bunny duo on an epic journey that will test their fortitude and their friendship. Can these pals work together to salvage this disastrous day? Another read-out-loud, laugh-out-loud picture book from bestselling author Jory John, paired with standout talent Erin Kraan, reminds us that even when your day seems to go completely off the rails, you can make it through any challenge—especially when you have a good friend by your side.
Everywhere You Go There's a Zacchaeus Up a Tree: Small-Town Faith and Words of Wisdom from Roger Campbell’s Newspaper Columns
by Roger Campell Timothy CampellThe wholesome, winsome wit and wisdom of columnist Roger CampbellEvery week for nearly forty years, Roger Campbell took up his pen to craft a newspaper column that would make a difference in the lives of his readers. His tales of fishing, family, friends, and fun helped them to trade their fears for faith, their sorrows for songs, and their doubts for certainties.Everywhere You Go There's a Zacchaeus Up a Tree is an anthology edited by his son, drawn from these weekly columns. Based on Roger's experiences in the world at large, the pastorate, his community, and his family, these brief but wise essays are enriching, instructive, and gently challenging. Roger's habit of humbly talking with people from all walks of life wherever he went provided ample opportunity to impact generations of folks. His warm words still bear witness to the truth that God meets us where we are and uses us when we are willing.Always starting with a Scripture reference, these short entries can be read as a daily or weekly devotion.For those longing for a simpler time and the flavor of small-town life, Everywhere You Go There's a Zacchaeus Up a Tree shares a deep, abiding, homespun faith that knows, as Campbell wrote, that "God loves you no matter which way the wind blows."
Eve's Hollywood
by Holly Brubach Eve BabitzJournalist, party girl, bookworm, artist, muse: by the time she'd hit thirty, Eve Babitz had played all of these roles. Immortalized as the nude beauty facing down Duchamp and as one of Ed Ruscha's Five 1965 Girlfriends, Babitz's first book showed her to be a razor-sharp writer with tales of her own. Eve's Hollywood is an album of vivid snapshots of Southern California's haute bohemians, of outrageously beautiful high-school ingenues and enviably tattooed Chicanas, of rock stars sleeping it off at the Chateau Marmont. And though Babitz's prose might appear careening, she's in control as she takes us on a ride through an LA of perpetual delight, from a joint serving the perfect taquito, to the corner of La Brea and Sunset where we make eye contact with a roller-skating hooker, to the Watts Towers. This "daughter of the wasteland" is here to show us that her city is no wasteland at all but a glowing landscape of swaying fruit trees and blooming bougainvillea, buffeted by earthquakes and the Santa Ana winds--and every bit as seductive as she is.
Evidence of Sin (Pennington #3)
by Catherine GeorgeThe Real ThingSuccessful barrister Piers Audley was a master of the art of persuasion. Handsome and sophisticated, he could charm his way into any woman's heart...except Chloe's. For years she'd cherished a secret passion for another man whom she could never have, and when Piers offered to help her forget the pain of her unrequited love, her world was turned upside down. Chloe discovered that it was one thing to experience love at long distance, but close up it was a different matter. Piers was offering her a real relationship.... Was she brave enough to take the chance?
Evie's Little Black Book
by Hannah PearlShe wants to find Mr. Right—and step one is hunting down every man she’s ever kissed . . . When Evie is invited to the wedding of the guy she’d crushed on throughout her teens, it’s the final straw. What’s wrong with her and why can’t she keep a man? Between consoling herself with ice cream and chocolate and sobbing her heart out to her cousin, Evie has a brainwave—and it all centers around her little black book (well, it’s more of a floral-patterned notebook, really), which contains the details of every man she’s ever kissed or dated. Perhaps the cure for her disastrous love life has been nestled within its pages all along—or maybe she’ll learn that exes are exes for a reason . . .
Evil Cat
by Elia AnieThis cat will steal your heart. Literally. Think all cats are sweet, fluffy creatures with big eyes that can melt even the hardest of hearts? Think again. In 95 hilarious cartoons, Elia Anie shows all the reprehensible depths to which one particularly malevolent feline can sink. .
Evil Emperor Penguin (Evil Emperor Penguin Ser.)
by Laura Ellen AndersonA hilarious, adorable graphic novel for younger readers about an Evil Emperor Penguin who wants to take over the world. Part Despicable Me, part Pinky and the Brain, part Happy Feet...all fun!Far away in the icy wastes of Antarctica lives a warm and cuddly, kind-hearted penguin who only wants to do good in the world . . . NOT! This is no ordinary penguin. This is . . . EVIL EMPEROR PENGUIN! And he wants to take over the world!Of course, every evil ruler needs a sidekick and a minion, and Evil Emperor Penguin is no different. That's why he has Number 8, a very polite and thoughtful octopus who knits, and Eugene, the incredibly cuddly abominable snowman who loves hugs.Join this fearsome team of Evil as they try to take over the world--and obviously, destroy it--but get waylaid by evil cats, rogue farts, killer plants, and visiting sisters.
Evil Fairies Love Hair
by Mary G. ThompsonAli and her middle school classmates are raising flocks of fairies to make their wishes come true. But growing a flock is harder than it sounds: the fairies eat only human hair, and the rules for dealing with them are confusing, misleading, and subject to change. As Ali and her friends struggle to earn their wishes, mistakes are made, spells go awry, and soon Ali is up against hundreds of two-inch-tall imps who have very big plans--to replace all the parents in town!--and the power to carry them out. Comedy and fantasy intertwine in this lively tale of intrigue, magic, and the power of hair.
Evil Penguins
by Elia AnieWhat's black-and-white and evil all over? Get ready to find out the terrifying truth. . . . Penguins. They're everywhere-gracing movie screens, Coke ads, and merchandise. But don't let those happy feet fool you. When they're not surfing or marching bravely across the Antarctic, penguins have a whole other agenda going on. And it isn't pretty. InEvil Penguins, Elia Anie captures the antics of cute little birds who have gone over to the dark side. If you thought the worst a penguin could do is make you feel guilty about global warning, think again. Here are cartoons of penguins leading revolts, giving SpongeBob a swirly, causing plagues, clubbing baby seals, killing Inuits while dressed as ninjas, and wreaking havoc in dozens of other hysterically appalling ways. Both penguin lovers and those who know that evil can come in even the cuddliest packages will appreciate these bad birds.
The Evil Princess vs. the Brave Knight (Book 1)
by Jennifer L. HolmFor every parent tired of telling their kids to PLEASE JUST GET ALONG, this hilarious and imaginative new picture book--from the beloved creators of Babymouse--is here to help. Sort of.Meet the Evil Princess and the Brave Knight. She casts terrible spells, while he fights dragons. He rescues cats in distress, while she makes mischief. No wonder there isn't much peace in this kingdom! But is the Evil Princess really so evil? And is the Brave Knight truly as chivalrous as he seems? Children and parents will laugh at seeing familiar family dynamics play out in this charming and imaginative new story.
The Evil Princess vs. the Brave Knight: Make Good Choices? (Step into Reading)
by Jennifer L. Holm Matthew HolmFor every parent and caregiver tired of telling the kids it's not a good idea to eat cake for breakfast, this hilarious and imaginative new Step into Reading--from the beloved creators of Babymouse--is here to help. Sort of.Should the Evil Princess eat cake for breakfast? Should the Brave Knight jump in the muddly puddle? Watch them try to learn...to make, ahem, better choices, in this hilarious and perfectly young Step 2 Step into Reading.Step 2 readers use basic vocabulary and short sentences to tell simple stories. They are perfect for children who recognize familiar words and can sound out new words with help.