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All My Friends Are Still Dead
by Jory John Avery MonsenFrom the authors of the breakout best seller All my friends are dead comes a brand-new illustrated compendium of the humorous existential ruminations of people, animals, legendary monsters, and inanimate objects.
All My Friends Are Superheroes
by Andrew KaufmanAll Tom's friends really are superheroes. There's the Ear, the Spooner, the Impossible Man. Tom even married a superhero, the Perfectionist. But at their wedding, the Perfectionist was hypnotized (by ex-boyfriend Hypno, of course) to believe that Tom is invisible. Nothing he does can make her see him. Six months later, she's sure that Tom has abandoned her. So she's moving to Vancouver. She'll use her superpower to make Vancouver perfect and leave all the heartbreak in Toronto. With no idea Tom's beside her, she boards an airplane in Toronto. Tom has until the wheels touch the ground in Vancouver to convince her he's visible, or he loses her forever.
All My Friends Are Superheroes
by Andrew Kaufman Tom PercivalAll Tom's friends really are superheroes. There's the Ear, the Spooner, the Impossible Man. Tom even married a superhero, the Perfectionist. But at their wedding, the Perfectionist was hypnotized (by ex-boyfriend Hypno, of course) to believe that Tom is invisible. Nothing he does can make her see him. Six months later, she's sure that Tom has abandoned her. So she's moving to Vancouver. She'll use her superpower to make Vancouver perfect and leave all the heartbreak in Toronto. With no idea Tom's beside her, she boards an airplane. Tom has until the wheels touch the ground in Vancouver to convince her he's visible, or he loses her forever. The tenth anniversary edition of Andrew Kaufman's perennial favourite, All My Friends Are Superheroes, includes a new catalogue of superheroes and gorgeous illustrations by Tom Percival.
All My Patients Have Tales: Favorite Stories from a Vet's Practice
by Jeff Wells"All My Patients Have Tales "is a heartwarming and funny collection of stories by a dedicated veterinarian featuring wild horses, porcupine-quill-covered dogs, male cats in labor, an extremely ornery pygmy donkey, an enormous hog, as well as many other domestic, and not so "domestic" animals. Wells begins his work as an inexperienced recent college grad and emerges a caring and beloved veterinarian. Affording the reader an inside glimpse into his daily life, he narrates many uplifting, life-altering, life-threatening, and hilarious episodes.
All My Patients Have Tales: Favorite Stories from a Vet's Practice
by Jeff WellsAll My Patients Have Tales is a heartwarming and funny collection of stories by a dedicated veterinarian featuring wild horses, porcupine-quill-covered dogs, male cats in labor, an extremely ornery pygmy donkey, an enormous hog, as well as many other domestic, and not so "domestic" animals. Wells begins his work as an inexperienced recent college grad and emerges a caring and beloved veterinarian. Affording the reader an inside glimpse into his daily life, he narrates many uplifting, life-altering, lifethreatening, and hilarious episodes.
All My Patients Kick and Bite: More Favorite Stories From a Vet's Practice
by Jeff WellsThe highly amusing, uplifting and entertaining follow-up to All My Patients Have Tales. In this second collection by our intrepid vet, Jeff Wells has his work cut out for him when he learns that llamas do not take kindly to having their toenails trimmed, dog owners in the medical field can be a real pain, Scottish Highland cattle stick together and just might run a vet out of their enclosure, and fixing an overly amorous burro often needs to be prioritized. Told with Wells's trademark humor and gentle touch, these and many other heartwarming, heartbreaking, funny and strange stories will give readers a whole new appreciation for those who care for our pets.
All My Patients Kick and Bite: Favorite Stories from a Vet's Practice
by Jeff WellsThe highly amusing, uplifting and entertaining follow-up to All My Patients Have TalesIn this second collection by our intrepid vet, Jeff Wells has his work cut out for him when he learns thatllamas do not take kindly to having their toenails trimmed, dog owners in the medical field can be a real pain, Scottish Highland cattle stick together and just might run a vet out of their enclosure, and fixing an overly amorous burro often needs to be prioritized. Told with Wells's trademark humor and gentle touch, these and many other heartwarming, heartbreaking, funny and strange stories will give readers a whole new appreciation for those who care for our pets..
All New Dad Jokes: The perfect gift from the Instagram sensation @DadSaysJokes
by Dad Says JokesTHE BRAND-NEW BOOK FROM @DADSAYSJOKESAll New Dad Jokes is the second book from the most followed dad jokes page on Instagram, @DadSaysJokes. Now with a following of over 1 million, All New Dad Jokes provides brand new gags guaranteed to leave your friends and family laughing and groaning in equal measure.@DadSaysJokes is a community-run Instagram account with more than a million followers, inspired by the daily jokes of author Kit Chilvers' dad, Andrew. Every day, followers submit their jokes and the team picks their favourites - or Dad just drops in his own zinger! Kit, a young social networking mastermind started his career at the tender age of 14, when he created his original platform, Football.Newz, to serve audiences for the World cup 2014. He has recently added another nine platforms in different genres (of which @DadSaysJokes is one), with nine million followers and rising. This is his second book. Q: Where do naughty rainbows go?A: Prism.
All New Dad Jokes: The perfect gift from the Instagram sensation @DadSaysJokes
by Dad Says JokesALL NEW CONTENT FROM THE ORIGINAL BESTSELLERAll New Dad Jokes is the second book from the most followed dad jokes page on Instagram, @DadSaysJokes. Now with a following of over 1 million, All New Dad Jokes provides brand new gags guaranteed to leave your friends and family laughing and groaning in equal measure.@DadSaysJokes is a community-run Instagram account with more than a million followers, inspired by the daily jokes of author Kit Chilvers' dad, Andrew. Every day, followers submit their jokes and the team picks their favourites - or Dad just drops in his own zinger! Kit, a young social networking mastermind started his career at the tender age of 14, when he created his original platform, Football.Newz, to serve audiences for the World cup 2014. He has recently added another nine platforms in different genres (of which @DadSaysJokes is one), with nine million followers and rising. This is his second book. Q: Where do naughty rainbows go?A: Prism.
All New Letters from a Nut
by Ted L. Nancy Jerry SeinfeldHe's back: the curse of customer service departments everywhere--Ted L. Nancy, letter writer extraordinaire whose imbecilic queries have a way of eliciting equally idiotic answers from some of the world's biggest companies and dignitaries. From the bestselling author of Letters from a Nut comes the latest collection of seemingly serious but crazed correspondence. All New Letters from a Nut includes more than 200 letters, from bizarre to outright loony requests and compliments written by Mr. Nancy to Icelandic malls, German theme parks, shoe museums, foreign presidents, commode companies, waffle cone businesses, and the Hotel Del Fino in Greece along with their equally sincere but hilarious responses. With his previous books, Ted L. Nancy distinguished himself as America's favorite postal humorist. This latest compilation highlights his comic status through letters to an upscale Amsterdam hotel requesting a room for his 300 hamsters and him to put on his play HAMSTERDAM; to Vons Supermarkets complaining that their Diet Black Cherry soda is sending him paranormal messages; to Armour Meats seeking a 59-foot piece of bologna and a note to the City of Glendale, California, asking for help in starting his new comedy club, THE JOKESTRAP; and many more.... Throughout Ted L. Nancy demonstrates his genius for convincing people his absurd queries are dead serious, demonstrated by the responses he receives. All New Letters From a Nut is unabashedly silly, unapologetically sophomoric, and 100% funny. With a foreword by Jerry Seinfeld
All-Night Pharmacy: A Novel
by Ruth Madievsky*A NATIONAL BESTSELLER*Winner of the California Book AwardWinner of the National Jewish Book Award for Debut FictionFinalist for the Lambda Literary AwardsRachel Kushner meets David Lynch in this fever dream of an LA novel about a young woman who commits a drunken act of violence just before her sister vanishes without a traceOn the night of her high school graduation, a young woman follows her older sister Debbie to Salvation, a Los Angeles bar patronized by energy healers, aspiring actors, and all-around misfits. After the two share a bag of unidentified pills, the evening turns into a haze of sensual and risky interactions—nothing unusual for two sisters bound in an incredibly toxic relationship. Our unnamed narrator has always been under the spell of the alluring and rebellious Debbie and, despite her own hesitations, she has always said yes to nights like these. That is, until Debbie disappears.Falling deeper into the life she cultivated with her sister, our narrator gets a job as an emergency room secretary where she steals pills to sell on the side. Cue Sasha, a Jewish refugee from the former Soviet Union who arrives at the hospital claiming to be a psychic tasked with acting as the narrator&’s spiritual guide. The nature of this relationship evolves and blurs, a kaleidoscope of friendship, sex, mysticism, and ambiguous power dynamics.With prose pulsing like a neon sign, Ruth Madievsky&’s All-Night Pharmacy is an intoxicating portrait of a young woman consumed with unease over how a person should be. As she attempts sobriety and sexual embodiment, she must decide whether to search for her estranged sister, or allow her to remain a relic of the past.
All Over the Map: Rambles and Ruminations from the Canadian Road
by Ron JamesCanada's most verbally virtuosic comic makes his literary debut—and he's just as richly, gloriously funny on the page as on stage.His legion of fans—the ones who ensure his every show the length and breadth of Canada is sold out—recognize Ron James as one of the great stand-ups of his generation. His seemingly improvisational flights of fancy—no two shows are ever the same—are crammed with inventive phrase-making, feature a voluminous vocabulary, and put every word into the service of uproarious comedy. He sounds like a man born to write a great book—and now at last he has. But this is a book he has been writing for most of his life, in his head, in his car, while driving from gig to gig.In All Over the Map, Ron has brilliantly captured the voice that has enthralled millions on stage and screen. He also lets up a little on the usually relentless laughs (though there are still plenty of those) to reveal a new dimension to his beloved showbiz character. His hilarious reminscences of growing up in Nova Scotia and his early struggles as an aspiring comic, his reveries on such topics as family, country, celebrity and lessons learned from myriad chance encounters will deepen our appreciation for this great comic and win him many new fans in his new role as author.
All Over the Place: Adventures in Travel, True Love, and Petty Theft
by Geraldine DeruiterSome people are meant to travel the globe, to unwrap its secrets and share them with the world. And some people have no sense of direction, are terrified of pigeons, and get motion sickness from tying their shoes. These people are meant to stay home and eat nachos.Geraldine DeRuiter is the latter. But she won't let that stop her.Hilarious, irreverent, and heartfelt, All Over the Place chronicles the years Geraldine spent traveling the world after getting laid off from a job she loved. Those years taught her a great number of things, though the ability to read a map was not one of them. She has only a vague idea of where Russia is, but she now understands her Russian father better than ever before. She learned that what she thought was her mother's functional insanity was actually an equally incurable condition called "being Italian." She learned what it's like to travel the world with someone you already know and love--how that person can help you make sense of things and make far-off places feel like home. She learned about unemployment and brain tumors, lost luggage and lost opportunities, and just getting lost in countless terminals and cabs and hotel lobbies across the globe. And she learned that sometimes you can find yourself exactly where you need to be--even if you aren't quite sure where you are.
All Puns Blazing: The Best British Knockout Jokes
by Geoff RoweI don't like to brag but I can control a kayak brilliantly. Canoe?'Pardon' is the only French word that I know. I can only apologise.From Geoff Rowe and the Leicester Comedy Festival comes this brilliant tribute to that most British of jokes, the humble pun.Including a foreword from Dr Oliver Double and a wealth of hilarious (and occasionally groan-inducing) material from some of Britain's finest stand-up comedic talent, All Puns Blazing is a fun and fitting celebration of grassroots UK comedy.Featuring puns from:El Baldiniho - Lovdev Barpaga - Zahra Barri - Adele Cliff - Tony Cowards - Henry Dawe - Pauline Eyre - Friz Frizzle - Masai Graham - Sean Hegarty - Kevin Hudson - Leo Kearse - Colin Leggo - Nigel Lovell - Iain MacDonald - Kat Molinari - Laura Monmoth - Joseph Murphy - Graham Musk - Sean Patrick - Richard Pulsford - Paul Savage - Philip Simon - Rob Thomas - Andrew Tymms - Stevie Vegas - Chris Norton Walker - Darren Walsh - Richard Woolford - Jenan Younis
All Quiet on the Orient Express
by Magnus MillsStory of an itinerant odd-jobber, our narrator, watching the dregs of the summer run out in a run-down campground in England's Lake District. Soon he is hopelessly and hilariously enmeshed in the off-season mysteries of a placid northern community.
All-Season Edie
by Annabel LyonEleven-year-old Edie Jasmine Snow has one "perfect" thirteen-year-old sister, two loving parents, a cat named Dusty, a grandmother she suspects is a witch, and a grandfather who insists on calling her Albert. Framed by family summer vacations at the lake, All-Season Edie follows Edie through a tumultuous year in which her beloved grandfather becomes ill. In the face of family tragedy, Edie tries to practice witchcraft, learns to dance the flamenco, meets the Greek god Zeus doing his Christmas shopping at the mall, ruins the most important party of her sister's life and realizes that her family is both completely strange and absolutely normal.
All Set for Black, Thanks.: A New Look at Mourning
by Miriam WeinsteinWhen Miriam Weinstein&’s good friend died unexpectedly, and other losses followed close behind, it led to a year of introspection and black outfits. All Set For Black, Thanks ditches the sanctimony to give us the help, and the laughs, that we actually need in times of mourning and grief. She explores such topics as how we keep our dead with us even as we learn to let them go; why we should not bring casseroles; how to write the Best Eulogy Ever. Part memoir, part how-to, this book will help you get through the rough bargain of human existence: none of us gets out of here alive, but we live as if the lives of our loved ones had no end.
All Shook Up
by Susan AndersenA Man With a PastWhen an unexpected inheritance sends J.D. Carver to the Star Lake Lodge to claim his half, he's expecting trouble. Being greeted with open arms by the whole Lawrence gang—feisty Aunt Sophie and calm Uncle Ben, clearly off-limits Dru and her young son, Tate—just convinces him they're working an angle, and he's determined to uncover it. But a tiny part of him longs for the home-and-hearth life they have.A Woman With a ReputationDru's finally beaten her bad-girl reputation, and though the Lodge may not be exciting, she's fiercely protective of her quiet home. Hard-eyed J.D.'s ability to push all her buttons just proves how wrong he is for her. So why does her son hero-worship the guy? And why does her heart clench when he gets that "nose pressed against the candy shop window" look on his face?
All Signs Point to Malibu
by Jennifer Snow"A spicy enemies-to-lovers dream so full of delicious tension and chemistry that I couldn&’t turn the pages fast enough!" —Holly James, author of The Déjà GlitchFrom USA TODAY bestselling author Jennifer Snow comes a hilarious rom-com with a speculative twist that asks: Why put off until tomorrow the wedding you can sabotage today?Hailey Harris can&’t stop messing with fate. A successful life coach, Hailey uses her ability to glimpse the future to guide her clients down the right path. But her gift has made her own life lonely. After all, having a real friend would mean asking someone to believe the unbelievable.The one person she might have confided in—her ex, Liam Jensen—is newly engaged to a beautiful, sweet, thoughtful heiress. But when Hailey has a vision predicting a not-so-happy ending for the couple, her mission is clear: help Liam and his fiancée avoid the biggest mistake of their lives.Stopping the wedding while planning Liam&’s engagement party is no easy feat. And Warren Mitchell—Liam&’s sexy, irritating best man and Hailey&’s nemesis—is suspicious of Hailey&’s motivations. Between sleeping with her frenemy and watching her careful plans spiral out of control, Hailey discovers the real cause of Liam&’s future heartbreak. But now that she knows the truth, will Hailey keep on fighting fate or trust in the love she never saw coming?For fans of: My Best Friend's Wedding meets In Five Years Enemies to Lovers Second Chance Romance Magical Realism
All The Single Ladies
by Dorothea Benton FrankThe perennial New York Times bestselling author returns with an emotionally resonant novel that illuminates the power of friendship in women’s lives, and is filled with her trademark wit, poignant and timely themes, sassy, flesh-and-blood characters, and the steamy Southern atmosphere and beauty of her beloved Carolina Lowcountry.<P><P> Few writers capture the complexities, pain, and joy of relationships—between friends, family members, husbands and wives, or lovers—as beloved New York Times bestselling author Dorothea Benton Frank. In this charming, evocative, soul-touching novel, she once again takes us deep into the heart of the magical Lowcountry where three amazing middle-aged women are bonded by another amazing woman’s death.<P> Through their shared loss they forge a deep friendship, asking critical questions. Who was their friend and what did her life mean? Are they living the lives they imagined for themselves? Will they ever be able to afford to retire? How will they maximize their happiness? Security? Health? And ultimately, their own legacies?<P> A plan is conceived and unfurls with each turn of the tide during one sweltering summer on the Isle of Palms. Without ever fully realizing how close they were to the edge, they finally triumph amid laughter and maybe even newfound love.
All Summer With You: The perfect holiday read
by Beth GoodThere's no place like home...Nursing a broken heart, Jennifer Bolitho retreats to Pixie Cottage. Her new landlord - a former soldier turned movie heartthrob - has grounds so large, she's sure the little house nestled in the woods will bring her solitude.Alex Delgardo also has reasons to hide away. Seeking refuge after a tragic incident turned his world upside down, he knows that the most important thing now is to care for his ailing family. But when Jennifer enters their lives, that changes. Because, as they both learn, you can't heal others until you learn to heal yourself...See what REAL READERS are saying about Beth's books: 'If you want a quality romance with a difference this is it''One of my favourite authors - a warm hug of a book, perfect for those cold winter days, it is heartwarming, funny, with hints of romance ... I would have happily read this in one sitting, and was sorely tempted to' - Rachel's Random Reads'Charming, poignant and absolutely magical' 'It's a warm and comforting hug of a book and I loved it''Filled with all of the magic and sparkle of the festive season. This is a Christmas book not to be missed'
All Summer With You: The perfect holiday read
by Beth GoodThere's no place like home...Nursing a broken heart, Jennifer Bolitho retreats to Pixie Cottage. Her new landlord - a former soldier turned movie heartthrob - has grounds so large, she's sure the little house nestled in the woods will bring her solitude.Alex Delgardo also has reasons to hide away. Seeking refuge after a tragic incident turned his world upside down, he knows that the most important thing now is to care for his ailing family. But when Jennifer enters their lives, that changes. Because, as they both learn, you can't heal others until you learn to heal yourself...See what REAL READERS are saying about Beth's books: 'If you want a quality romance with a difference this is it''One of my favourite authors - a warm hug of a book, perfect for those cold winter days, it is heartwarming, funny, with hints of romance ... I would have happily read this in one sitting, and was sorely tempted to' - Rachel's Random Reads'Charming, poignant and absolutely magical' 'It's a warm and comforting hug of a book and I loved it''Filled with all of the magic and sparkle of the festive season. This is a Christmas book not to be missed'
All Teachers Bright and Beautiful (Book 3): A light-hearted memoir of a husband, father and teacher in Yorkshire Dales
by Andy SeedMore lessons and life from the Yorkshire Dales...All Teachers Bright and Beautiful is the concluding volume in Andy Seed's trilogy. As always, the book is peppered with the hilarious and heart-warming incidents that a life living and working with children inevitably contains. Andy Seed is sure to charm fans of Jack Sheffield and Gervase Phinn.Andy Seed is beginning his fifth year teaching at Cragthwaite Primary in the Yorkshire Dales, and as always a new term is full of surprises.These take the form of a beautiful, but not terribly bright, student on placement from the local teacher training college, and a particularly pushy and problematic parent with a fine line in complaining. It looks like Andy's pupils are the least of his problems...At home in Applesett, things aren't all rosy either. Barbara is forced to take a job as a postie to help pay the mortgage, which means finding someone to look after Tom and Reuben. When two old friends move into the village it looks like the problem has been solved, but it soon transpires that rural life is not for everyone...What readers are saying about All Teachers Bright and Beautiful:'A sequence of classroom tales told with considerable wit and charm that will raise a chuckle and perhaps even make you shed a tear''Delightful read. Humorous, warm and really interesting finding out about all the little personalities of the primary school children he teaches''Another gem. The book flows nicely with alternating chapters about his school life and home life. A sweet book'
All Teachers Bright and Beautiful (Book 3): A light-hearted memoir of a husband, father and teacher in Yorkshire Dales
by Andy SeedMore lessons and life from the Yorkshire Dales...All Teachers Bright and Beautiful is the concluding volume in Andy Seed's trilogy. As always, the book is peppered with the hilarious and heart-warming incidents that a life living and working with children inevitably contains. Andy Seed is sure to charm fans of Jack Sheffield and Gervase Phinn.Andy Seed is beginning his fifth year teaching at Cragthwaite Primary in the Yorkshire Dales, and as always a new term is full of surprises.These take the form of a beautiful, but not terribly bright, student on placement from the local teacher training college, and a particularly pushy and problematic parent with a fine line in complaining. It looks like Andy's pupils are the least of his problems...At home in Applesett, things aren't all rosy either. Barbara is forced to take a job as a postie to help pay the mortgage, which means finding someone to look after Tom and Reuben. When two old friends move into the village it looks like the problem has been solved, but it soon transpires that rural life is not for everyone...What readers are saying about All Teachers Bright and Beautiful:'A sequence of classroom tales told with considerable wit and charm that will raise a chuckle and perhaps even make you shed a tear''Delightful read. Humorous, warm and really interesting finding out about all the little personalities of the primary school children he teaches''Another gem. The book flows nicely with alternating chapters about his school life and home life. A sweet book'
All Teachers Great and Small (Book 1): A heart-warming and humorous memoir of lessons and life in the Yorkshire Dales
by Andy SeedA memoir of lessons and life in the Yorkshire Dales...Warm, touching and very funny, All Teacher's Great and Small transports you to a time that may be gone but has never been forgotten. Andy Seed's memoir is sure to charm fans of Jack Sheffield and Gervase Phinn's nostalgic style. 'Heart-warming and hilarious' - Daily Mail Dear Mr Seed, I am sorry that are Jack was not at school yesterday. He put on such a groth spurt in the night that nun of his clowthes fitted im next morning so I had to take him to the shops. Mrs R. Twenty-five years ago, newly qualified teacher Andy Seed moved to a remote village in the Yorkshire Dales with his wife Barbara, anticipating breath-taking views and the gentle simplicity of the countryside. The picturesque scenery did not disappoint. But life as a primary school teacher was anything but simple. With a classroom full of colourful characters whose capacity for misunderstanding was exceeded only by their enthusiasm and their ability to leave him incredulous, Andy fell in love with teaching and with village life. All Teachers Great and Small tells the true story of Andy's first year at Cragthwaite Primary School - how he bravely negotiated the vagaries of the local dialect, made disastrous bids to provide a family home, naively and hilariously tried out new-fangled ideas in a school stuck in a 1950s time warp, and ultimately discovered a little part of England he was proud to call home.What readers are saying about All Teachers Great and Small:'I howled with laughter on many occasions reading this book - it's a treasure!''Andy Seed brings the Dales to life with his memorable stories about rural school life in the 1980s. I loved this book' 'This book spoke to me on so many levels. It really is a jolly good read, and written with love and enthusiasm'