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I Hope This Finds You Well: A Novel
by Natalie SueIn this wildly funny and heart-warming office comedy, an admin worker accidentally gains access to her colleagues’ private emails and DMs and decides to use this intel to save her job. A laugh-till-you-cry debut novel you’ll be eager to share with your entire list of contacts, perfect for fans of Anxious People and Eleanor Oliphant Is Completely Fine. As far as Jolene is concerned, her interactions with her colleagues should start and end with her official duties as an admin for Supershops, Inc. Unfortunately, her irritating, incompetent coworkers don’t seem to understand the importance of boundaries. Her secret to survival? She vents her grievances in petty email postscripts, then changes the text colour to white so no one can see. That is, until one of her secret messages is exposed. Her punishment: sensitivity training (led by the suspiciously friendly HR guy, Cliff) and rigorous email restrictions.When an IT mix-up grants her access to her entire department’s private emails and DMs, Jolene knows she should report it, but who could resist reading what their coworkers are really saying? And when she discovers layoffs are coming, she realizes this might just be the key to saving her job. The plan is simple: gain her boss’s favour, convince HR she’s Supershops material and beat out the competition.But as Jolene is drawn further into her coworker’s private worlds and secrets, her carefully constructed walls begin to crumble—especially around Cliff, who she definitely cannot have feelings for. Soon she will need to decide if she’s ready to leave the comfort of her cubicle, even if it means coming clean to her colleagues.Crackling with laugh-out-loud dialogue and relatable observations, I Hope This Finds You Well is a fresh and surprisingly tender comedy about loneliness and love beyond our computer screens. This sparkling debut novel will open your heart to the everyday eccentricities of work culture and the undeniable human connection that comes with it.
I Hope This Finds You Well: A Novel
by Natalie SueINTERNATIONAL BESTSELLER • Recommended by the New York Times Book Review, Today show, People, Elle, Good Housekeeping, Parade, Harper's Bazaar, and more!"Fans of The Office will delight." — SHELBY VAN PELT • "Wickedly funny." — PEOPLE • "I could not put it down." — JULIA QUINN • "A workplace sitcom transformed into a romantic comedy novel." — ELLEIn this wildly funny and heartwarming office comedy, an admin worker accidentally gains access to her colleagues’ private emails and DMs and decides to use this intel to save her job—a laugh-till-you-cry debut novel you’ll be eager to share with your entire list of contacts, perfect for fans of Anxious People and Eleanor Oliphant Is Completely Fine. As far as Jolene is concerned, her interactions with her colleagues should start and end with her official duties as an admin for Supershops, Inc. Unfortunately, her irritating, incompetent coworkers don’t seem to understand the importance of boundaries. Her secret to survival? She vents her grievances in petty email postscripts, then changes the text color to white so no one can see. That is until one of her secret messages is exposed. Her punishment: sensitivity training (led by the suspiciously friendly HR guy, Cliff) and rigorous email restrictions.When an IT mix-up grants her access to her entire department’s private emails and DMs, Jolene knows she should report it, but who could resist reading what their coworkers are really saying? And when she discovers layoffs are coming, she realizes this might just be the key to saving her job. The plan is simple: gain her boss’s favor, convince HR she’s Supershops material, and beat out the competition.But as Jolene is drawn further into her coworkers' private worlds and realizes they are each keeping secrets, her carefully constructed walls begin to crumble—especially around Cliff, who she definitely cannot have feelings for. Eventually she will need to decide if she’s ready to leave the comfort of her cubicle, even if that means coming clean to her colleagues.Crackling with laugh-out-loud dialogue and relatable observations, I Hope This Finds You Well is a fresh and surprisingly tender comedy about loneliness and love beyond our computer screens. This sparkling debut novel will open your heart to the everyday eccentricities of work culture and the undeniable human connection that comes along with it.
I Judge You When You Use Poor Grammar: A Collection of Egregious Errors, Disconcerting Bloopers, and Other Linguistic Slip-Ups
by Sharon Eliza NicholsA hilarious and eye-opening tour of unforgettable typos, misspellings, and more with pictures culled from the Facebook group by the same name.Correct grammar and proper spelling can be a challenge, and their absence can be a source of gleeful humor to everyone but the victim of a bad grammar attack. How do you react to sandwich boards, road signs, laminated instructions, and other written missives that are just not exactly what their creator meant? If you’ve ever (gently) judged anyone else for their linguistic failures, if you find yourself guffawing about the frequent confusion between “incontinence” and “inconvenience,” if you’ve ever been tempted to whip out your marker to add in or cross out apostrophes, and if you’ve refused to answer e-mails in which “your” and “you’re” are used interchangeably, this book is for you.
I Just Want My Pants Back: A Novel
by David RosenNow a new MTV series, from acclaimed director and executive producer Doug Liman ("Mr. and Mrs. Smith, "Swingers," "Go," "Bourne Identity")Jason Strider is a twentysomething young man in the city, with an English degree from an Ivy League university, a very small apartment in the West Village, a vapid job as a receptionist at a casting agency--and no particular idea what to do with his life. On most evenings, Jason gets stoned and goes out, sometimes with his party-hearty school chum Tina and sometimes alone in the immemorial male quest to get laid or, if not, get hammered enough to really regret it the next day and be late for work. Then one night Jason has athletic, appliance-assisted intercourse with a cute girl named Jane--and ends up lending her his Dickies jeans. Many, many e-mails and text messages later, he is unable to reconnect with her and is reduced to the plaint "I just want my pants back." How he does, in a most unexpected way, find those pants, and how maturity and mortality come to enter his slacker's existence, form the matter of this smart, raunchily comic, and finally affecting first novel.
I Killed: True Stories of the Road from America's Top Comics
by Rich Shydner Mark SchiffThe biggest names in standup comedy reveal the howlingly funny, completely shocking, and disturbingly bizarre moments they've experienced on the road.
I Kissed Shara Wheeler
by Casey McQuistonFrom the New York Times bestselling author of One Last Stop and Red, White & Royal Blue comes a romantic comedy about chasing down what you want, only to find what you need... <p><p> Chloe Green is so close to winning. After her moms moved her from SoCal to Alabama for high school, she’s spent the past four years dodging gossipy classmates and the puritanical administration of Willowgrove Christian Academy. The thing that’s kept her going: winning valedictorian. Her only rival: prom queen Shara Wheeler, the principal’s perfect progeny. <p><p> But a month before graduation, Shara kisses Chloe and vanishes. <p><p> On a furious hunt for answers, Chloe discovers she’s not the only one Shara kissed. There’s also Smith, Shara’s longtime quarterback sweetheart, and Rory, Shara’s bad boy neighbor with a crush. The three have nothing in common except Shara and the annoyingly cryptic notes she left behind, but together they must untangle Shara’s trail of clues and find her. It’ll be worth it, if Chloe can drag Shara back before graduation to beat her fair and square. <p><p> Thrown into an unlikely alliance, chasing a ghost through parties, break-ins, puzzles, and secrets revealed on monogrammed stationery, Chloe starts to suspect there might be more to this small town than she thought. And maybe―probably not, but maybe―more to Shara, too. <p><p> Fierce, funny, and frank, Casey McQuiston's I Kissed Shara Wheeler is about breaking the rules, getting messy, and finding love in unexpected places. <p> <b>New York Times Bestseller</b>
I Kissed a Girl
by Jennet AlexanderCan an up-and-coming horror actressand the makeup artist for her newest "creature feature"turn on-set chemistry into the romance of a lifetime?Lilah Silver's a young actress who dreams of climbing out of B-list stardom. She's been cast as the lead in what could be her breakout performance...but if she wants to prove herself to everyone who ever doubted her, she's going to need major help along the way.Noa Birnbaum may be a brilliant makeup artist and special effects whiz-kid, but cracking into the union is more difficult than she imagined. Keeping everyone happy is a full-time job, and she's already run ragged. And yet when the beautiful star she's been secretly crushing on admits to fears of her own, Noa vows to do everything in her power to help Lilah shine like never before.Long hours? Exhausting work? No problem. Together they can take the world by storm...but can the connection forged over long hours in the makeup chair ever hope to survive the glare of the spotlight?
I Kissed a Zombie, and I Liked It
by Adam SelzerAlgonquin “Ali” Rhodes, the high school newspaper’s music critic, meets an intriguing singer, Doug, while reviewing a gig. He’s a weird-looking guy—goth, but he seems sincere about it, like maybe he was into it back before it was cool. She introduces herself after the set, asking if he lives in Cornersville, and he replies, in his slow, quiet murmur, “Well, I don’t really live there, exactly. . . . ” When Ali and Doug start dating, Ali is falling so hard she doesn’t notice a few odd signs: he never changes clothes, his head is a funny shape, and he says practically nothing out loud. Finally Marie, the school paper’s fashion editor, points out the obvious: Doug isn’t just a really sincere goth. He’s a zombie. Horrified that her feelings could have allowed her to overlook such a flaw, Ali breaks up with Doug, but learns that zombies are awfully hard to get rid of—at the same time she learns that vampires, a group as tightly-knit as the mafia, don’t think much of music critics who make fun of vampires in reviews. . . .
I Knead My Mommy: And Other Poems by Kittens
by Francesco MarciulianoJust when we all thought things couldn't get any cuter, from the author of the New York Times bestselling I Could Pee on This comes I Knead My Mommy, a book of confessional poems about the triumphs, trials, and daily discoveries of being a kitten. From climbing walls to claiming hearts, these little cats bare all in such instant classics as "And Then You Said 'No,'" "Ode to a Lizard I Didn't Know Is Also a Pet in This House," and "I Will Save You." With adorable photos of the poetic prodigies throughout, this volume gives readers a glimpse into their confused and curious feline minds as they encounter the world around them.
I Knead My Mommy: And Other Poems by Kittens
by Francesco MarciulianoA purrfect collection of poetry that explores kitten life from the New York Times–bestselling author of I Could Pee on This and I Could Chew on This. Just when we all thought things couldn&’t get any cuter comes a book of confessional poems about the triumphs, trials, and daily discoveries of being a kitten. From climbing walls to claiming hearts, these little cats bare all in such instant classics as &“And Then You Said &‘No,&’&” &“Ode to a Lizard I Didn&’t Know Is Also a Pet in This House,&” and &“I Will Save You.&” With adorable photos of the poetic prodigies throughout, this volume gives readers a glimpse into their confused and curious feline minds as they encounter the world around them.
I Knew You Were Trouble: A deliciously feel-good and sparkling rom-com from the author of The Prenup!
by Lauren LayneFrom the author of the feel-good romantic comedy hit The Prenup! If you love Sophie Kinsella, Lindsey Kelk and Sophie Ranald, you'll LOVE Lauren Layne!SHE NEEDS A ROOM MATE. HE'S MORE THAN SHE BARGAINED FOR.Readers give I Knew You Were Trouble FIVE STARS!'Witty, sexy and fun''It's like Friends but in books''*happy sigh* This book was so good''LL's story-telling leaves me with all the feels'Taylor Carr has it all - a sleek job in advertising, a stunning Manhattan apartment, and the perfect man to share it with: Bradley Calloway. Even after Bradley dumps her for a co-worker on move-in day, Taylor isn't worried. She'll get her man eventually. In the meantime, she needs a new roommate. Enter Nick Ballantine, career bartender, freelance writer - and longtime pain in Taylor's ass. Sexy in a permanent five-o'clock-shadow kind of way, Nick knows how to push Taylor's buttons, as if he could see right through to the real her.Nick's always trying to fix people, and nobody could use a good fixing more than Taylor. Sure, she's gorgeous, with mesmerizing silver eyes, but it's her vulnerability that kills him. Now that they're shacking up together, the chemistry is out of control. Soon they're putting every part of their two-bedroom apartment to good use. Then Taylor's ex comes crawling back to her, and Nick figures she'll jump at the chance to go back to her old life - unless he fights for the best thing that ever happened to him.'The word charm is pretty much synonymous with Lauren Layne' Hypable'Lauren Layne's books are as effervescent and delicious as a brunch mimosa. As soon as you read one, you're going to want another - IMMEDIATELY!' Karen Hawkins, New York Times bestselling author'The queen of witty dialogue' Rachel Van Dyken, New York Times bestselling author'Lauren Layne is a master at sexy banter and funny dialogue' BookPageWant more fun, fresh, flirty and very sexy rom-com? Check out all of Lauren's books! Don't miss:The PrenupThe Central Park Pact seriesOxford seriesWedding Belles seriesI Do, I Don't seriesLove, Unexpectedly series
I Knew You Were Trouble: An Oxford Novel (Oxford #4)
by Lauren LayneNew York City’s hottest bachelors are stirring up trouble in this fun, flirty Oxford Novel, as a love triangle forces a feisty beauty to choose between winning back Mr. Right or giving in to Mr. Wrong. Taylor Carr has it all—a sleek job in advertising, a stunning Manhattan apartment, and the perfect man to share it with: Bradley Calloway. Even after Bradley dumps her for a co-worker on move-in day, Taylor isn’t worried. She’ll get her man eventually. In the meantime, she needs a new roommate. Enter Nick Ballantine, career bartender, freelance writer—and longtime pain in Taylor’s ass. Sexy in a permanent five-o’clock-shadow kind of way, Nick knows how to push Taylor’s buttons, as if he could see right through to the real her. Nick’s always trying to fix people, and nobody could use a good fixing more than Taylor. Sure, she’s gorgeous, with mesmerizing silver eyes, but it’s her vulnerability that kills him. Now that they’re shacking up together, the chemistry is out of control. Soon they’re putting every part of their two-bedroom apartment to good use. Then Taylor’s ex comes crawling back to her, and Nick figures she’ll jump at the chance to go back to her old life—unless he fights for the best thing that ever happened to him.Lauren Layne’s New York Times bestselling Oxford series can be read in any order: IRRESISTIBLY YOURS I WISH YOU WERE MINE SOMEONE LIKE YOU I KNEW YOU WERE TROUBLEDon’t miss any of Lauren Layne’s hot reads:The Love Unexpectedly series: BLURRED LINES | GOOD GIRL | LOVE STORY | WALK OF SHAME | AN EX FOR CHRISTMASThe Sex, Love & Stiletto series: AFTER THE KISS | LOVE THE ONE YOU’RE WITH | JUST ONE NIGHT | THE TROUBLE WITH LOVEPraise for I Knew You Were Trouble“I can always count on enjoying a Lauren Layne book and this was no exception. Looking forward to whatever she’s going to give us next!”—The Book Hookup“Lauren Layne is a master of the book hangover. I laughed! I cried! I laughed and cried some more! I can’t get enough of Layne’s fantastic heroes.”—Jessica Lemmon, author of Forgotten Promises“A fun, sexy tap dance around true feelings and emotions that will make you root for these two to finally get together . . . and stay there!”—Carly Phillips, New York Times bestselling author“A sexy game of cat and mouse where the roles switch constantly and the winner in the end is the reader! Another win in this awesome series.”—New York Times bestselling author Melanie Moreland“I love the Stiletto/Oxford books, and I Knew You Were Trouble has it all: a smoking hot hero, a heroine you want to invite to your next girls’ night out, and that fabulous, trademark Lauren Layne sexual tension.”—Serena Bell, USA Todaybestselling author of the Returning Home seriesIncludes an excerpt from another Loveswept title.
I Know A Wee Piggy
by Kimberly E. NormanA clever, colorful read-aloud in the tradition of I Know an Old Lady Who Swallowed a Fly A fun day at the fair becomes color chaos when one boy's energetic pig gets loose. Upside down, piggy wallows in brown, but that's only the beginning of this cumulative, rhyming text. Soon, he's adding a rinse of red (tomatoes), a wash of white (milk), a pinch of pink (cotton candy), and many more. Can piggy be caught before he turns the whole fair upside down? With exuberant art by Henry Cole, this wild pig chase is a natural choice for teaching colors and begs to be read aloud.
I Know You Got Soul
by Jeremy ClarksonIn I Know You Got Soul, Jeremy Clarkson writes about the machines that he believes have 'soul'. It will come as no surprise to anyone that Jeremy Clarkson loves machines. But it's not just any old bucket of blots, cogs and bearings that rings his bell. In fact, he's scoured the length and breadth of the land, plunged into the oceans and taken to the skies in search of machines with that elusive certain something.And along the way he's discovered:* The safest place to be in the event of nuclear war* Who would win if Superman, James Bond and The Terminator had a fight* The stupidest person he's ever met* What an old Cornish institution called Arthur has to do with 0898chat lines* And how Jean Claude Van Damme might get eaten by a lion . . .In I Know You Got Soul, Jeremy Clarkson tells stories of the geniuses, innovators and crackpots who put the ghost in the machine. From Brunel's SS Great Britain to the awesome Blackbird spy-plane and from the woeful - but inspiring - Graf Zeppelin to Han Solo's Millennium Falcon, they can't help but love them in return.Praise for Jeremy Clarkson:'Brilliant . . . laugh-out-loud' Daily Telegraph'Outrageously funny . . . will have you in stitches' Time Out'Very funny . . . I cracked up laughing on the tube' Evening Standard
I Know a Shy Fellow Who Swallowed a Cello
by Barbara S. GarrielPerfect for any young reader interested in music, families who love music, and a must-have staple for music classrooms, this funny picture book is an amusing introduction to the instruments in an orchestra, featuring clever rhymes and whimsical illustrations. Meet a shy fellow! He&’s hard to notice, but he&’s right at the side of the room listening to a duet for cello and viola. But look again -- our shy fellow suddenly has an urge to swallow a HUGE cello, which is precisely what he does. And he doesn't stop there! He also swallows a harp, a saxophone, and a fiddle while trying to satisfy his voracious appetite for musical instruments. But when he swallows a teensy, tiny, little bitty bell, you won&’t believe what happens! In this take-off on a classic children&’s song, kids will laugh out loud and learn all about musical instruments with this story that&’s a melodious mix of fun and frivolity.
I Know an Old Lady
by Edward MillerLearn about animals and meet an elderly woman with a peculiar palate in this delightfully illustrated, absurd, modern twist on a classic song.An updated and slightly different take on the classic folk song &“There Was an Old Lady Who Swallowed a Fly&”—with a new, kid-friendly ending—I Know an Old Lady is a humorous picture book for children featuring the iconic old lady that can&’t stop eating the strangest things! With memorable lyrics and absurd illustrations, watch as the old lady&’s stomach fills up with bizarre objects, from a small fly all the way up to a horse. This silly children&’s book of a timeless tale will delight both kids and parents alike!This is a fixed-format ebook, which preserves the design and layout of the original print book
I Like It Here at School
by Jack PrelutskyIf you wish you could Go to school every day Or if you'd rather Stay outside and play These poems will tickle your funny bone. You won't be able to leave it alone Here are 26 poems all about school from homework to tests, globes to books, recess to gym class and show and tell to substitute teachers. You'll love this book. It will even make your teachers laugh! Some pictures are described.
I Like Old Clothes
by Mary Ann Hoberman Patrice BartonI like old clothes, / Hand-me-down clothes, / Worn outgrown clothes, / Not-my-own clothes. . . . Originally published by Knopf in 1976 (with illustrations by Jacqueline Chwast), this poem--an exuberant celebration of hand-me-down clothes--is just as relevant and accessible today as it was over 30 years ago. Children's Poet Laureate Mary Ann Hoberman offers a bouncy, fun-to-read-aloud text and a refreshingly agreeable, resourceful protagonist who likes old clothes for their "history" and "mystery." Illustrator Patrice Barton brings new, contemporary life to the poem, with an adorable little girl and her younger brother playing dress-up, making crafts, and happily treasuring their hand-me-downs.
I Like You Just the Way I Am: Stories About Me and Some Other People
by Jenny MollenA New York Times Best Seller!By the actress, writer, and one of the funniest women on Twitter, an outrageous, hysterical memoir of acting on impulse, plotting elaborate hoaxes, and refusing to acknowledge boundaries in any formJenny Mollen is an actress and writer living in Los Angeles. She is also a wife, married to a famous guy (which is annoying only because he gets free shit and she doesn't). She doesn't want much from life. Just to be loved—by everybody: her parents, her dogs, her ex-boyfriends, her ex-boyfriends' dogs, her husband, her husband's ex-girlfriends, her husband's ex-girlfriend's new boyfriends, etc. Some people might call that impulse crazy, but isn't "crazy" really just a word boring people use to describe fun people? (And Jenny is really, really fun, you guys!) In these pages, you'll find stories of Jenny at her most genuine, whether it's stalking her therapist (because he knows everything about her so shouldn't she get to know everything about him?); throwing a bachelorette party so bad that one of the guests is suspected dead; or answering the eternal question, Would your best friend blow your husband on a car ride to dinner if she didn't know you were hiding in the backseat?I Like You Just the Way I Am is about not doing the right thing—about indulging your inner crazy-person. It is Jenny when she's not trying to impress anyone or come across as a responsible, level-headed member of society. With any luck it will make you better acquainted with who you really are and what you really want. Which, let's be honest, is most likely someone else's email password.
I Live In Your Basement (Goosebumps #61)
by R. L. Stine"Don't do this! Watch out for that!" Marco's mom thinks the whole world is a danger zone. She won't even let Marco play softball.But Marco just wants to have fun. So he sneaks off to a game. And that's when it happens. He gets hit in the head with a baseball bat.Now things are getting really fuzzy. Really scary. Because when Marco gets home he gets the strangest call. From someone who says he lives in Marco's basement...
I Lost Everything in the Post-Natal Depression
by Erma BombeckErma Bombeck has learned a few things about children and family over the years--and in a way that is uniquely and wonderfully her own, she shares everything she knows with her readers. Whether it's cleaning up after the kids and him, or expendable mothers-in-law, Erma Bombeck gets to the heart of the matter and makes us laugh through our tears.From the Trade Paperback edition.
I Lost My Girlish Laughter
by Jane AllenA lost literary gem of Hollywood in the 1930s, I Lost My Girlish Laughter is a thinly veiled send-up of the actors, producers, writers, and directors of the Golden Age of the studio system.Madge Lawrence, fresh from New York City, lands a job as the personal secretary to the powerful Hollywood producer Sidney Brand (based on the legendary David O. Selznick). In a series of letters home, Western Union telegrams, office memos, Hollywood gossip newspaper items, and personal journal entries, we get served up the inside scoop on all the shenanigans, romances, backroom deals, and betrayals that go into making a movie. The action revolves around the production of Brand's latest blockbuster, meant to be a star vehicle to introduce his new European bombshell (the real-life Marlene Dietrich). Nevermind that the actress can't act, Brands' negotiations with MGM to get Clark Gable to play the male lead are getting nowhere, and the Broadway play he's bought for the screenplay is reworked so that it is unrecognizable to its author. In this delicious satire of the film business, one is never very far from the truth of what makes Hollywood tick and why we all love it.
I Lost My Grandfather's Brain
by Bruce CovilleSome kids lose their math book, or their sneakers, or their lunch. Pleskit Meenom, first alien kid to go to school on Earth, has a bigger problem: He's lost his grandfather's brain!
I Love Geeks
by Carrie TuckerThere's no doubt about it. While they may be stuck inside all day playing video games, or spending their extra money on rare editions of comic books (er, graphic novels) - geeks are chic. And why shouldn't they be? Geeks (along with their close friends, dorks and nerds) run the world, they're loyal as hell, and their extreme passions are fascinating. So how can women make them as passionate for their girlfriends as they are forStar Wars? Self-proclaimed geek and geek-lover Carrie Tucker expertly guides women into nerddom by categorizing and exposing men by their different geeky obsessions. Complete with a glossary for technical jargon, helpful quotes from geek-perts, and illustrations of each nerd niche, Tucker will help women bring a relationship with a geek from ?in a galaxy far, far away? into reality.
I Love Geeks
by Carrie TuckerThere's no doubt about it. While they may be stuck inside all day playing video games, or spending their extra money on rare editions of comic books (er, graphic novels) - geeks are chic. And why shouldn't they be? Geeks (along with their close friends, dorks and nerds) run the world, they're loyal as hell, and their extreme passions are fascinating. So how can women make them as passionate for their girlfriends as they are for Star Wars? Self-proclaimed geek and geek-lover Carrie Tucker expertly guides women into nerddom by categorizing and exposing men by their different geeky obsessions. Complete with a glossary for technical jargon, helpful quotes from geek-perts, and illustrations of each nerd niche, Tucker will help women bring a relationship with a geek from "in a galaxy far, far away" into reality.