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Hair Raising: The Cases of Dan Shamble, Zombie P.I.
by Kevin J. AndersonA zombie private detective must determine who&’s scalping werewolves in this mystery by a New York Times–bestselling author. The fur really flies when a serial scalper stalks the supernatural citizens of the Unnatural Quarter, targeting werewolves—and what&’s sadder than a bald lycanthrope? Dan Shamble, zombie P.I., is on the case, trying to stop an all-out gang war between full-time and full-moon werewolves. As he combs through the tangled clues to hunt down the bald facts, things get hairy fast. Shamble lurches through a loony landscape of voodoo tattoo artists, illicit cockatrice fights, body builders assembling make-your-own human kits, and perhaps scariest of all, crazed fans in town for the Worldwide Horror Convention. Yet the reign of hair-raising terror grows longer. If Shamble can&’t snip this off at the roots, the whole world could end up howling mad. Praise for Hair Raising:&“Dan . . . who&’ll clearly do anything for a laugh, seems to be having the time of his afterlife. The result is like an early, funny Woody Allen film with zombies, ghosts, vampires and werewolves.&” —Kirkus Reviews&“Fans of humorously handled urban fantasies, mysteries, and horror stories won&’t stop laughing until long after they&’ve finished the book.&” —Booklist
Hair Raising
by Kevin J. Anderson"The Dan Shamble books are great fun." --Simon R. Green Ready-To-WereThe fur really flies when a serial scalper stalks the supernatural citizens of the Unnatural Quarter, targeting werewolves--and what's sadder than a chrome-domed lycanthrope? Zombie P.I. Dan Shamble is on the case, trying to stop an all-out gang war between full-time and full-moon werewolves. As he combs through the tangled clues to hunt down the bald facts, things get hairy fast.Shamble lurches through a loony landscape of voodoo tattoo artists, illicit cockatrice fights, body builders assembling make-your-own-human kits, and perhaps scariest of all, crazed fans in town for the Worldwide Horror Convention. Yet the reign of hair-raising terror grows longer. If Shamble can't snip this off at the roots, the whole world could end up howling mad.Praise for the Dan Shamble Novels"Prepare to be entertained."--Charlaine Harris"Darkly funny, wonderfully original."--Kelley Armstrong "Two decaying thumbs up!"--Jonathan Maberry
The Haircutter: A Novel
by Dana ThompsonBorn in the small town of Ten Sleep, Wyoming, The Haircutter—or H.C.— murders an enigmatic “Jenny” and flees to the glittering anonymity of New York City. Eight years later, after a series of odd jobs and lonely meals, H.C. is charged with driving a wolf from New York back to Wyoming, where it was captured for use in a conceptual art show. While back out West, he has a chance encounter with the girl he could never forget—slightly cross-eyed Carol. Now shacked up with H.C. in the city, Carol discovers H.C.’s eponymous secret—his compulsion to cut off locks of strangers’ hair in public, archive them on a hidden door in their apartment. Carol declares the bizarre habit to be high art, and sends the work to the eccentric gallerist Leslie Christmas, thrusting The Haircutter into the spotlight of NYC’s art scene. Christmas creates a sensation out of the rube from Wyoming, who is only along for the ride to keep Carol in his bed, but when he is accused of another murder, he must scramble to set the record straight. The Haircutter tells the story of what is gained and lost in H.C.’s pursuit of love and meaning in a fascinatingly absurdist world. By turns hysterical, disgusting, subversive, and heartbreaking, The Haircutter is a madcap romp alive with cultural provocation and twisted stereotypes. It is an uproarious send-up to fame and the pursuit of artistic expression that fearlessly combines sincerity and debauchery.
Hairdresser on Fire
by Daniel LevesqueThis is not a hair book. It's a dark comedy of a spiritual misfit, a child with a dream born into the wrong town. Religious cults, corporate cults, insane clients-Francis can't catch a break. Francis has observed his own inability to fit in since birth, and his decision to be a professional cosmetologist only exacerbates his innate oddness.Daniel LeVesque accepted his cosmically assigned career of cosmetologist after attending the Arthur Angelo School of Cosmetology and Hair Design. His writing appears in Punk Globe and numerous anthologies. He currently resides in Oakland, California. This is his first book.
Hairpin Curves: A Road Trip Romance
by Elia Winters“RITA award winner Winters crafts an insightful second-chance romance that works all the better for the wish fulfilment of its premise.” —Publishers WeeklyMegan Harris had hopes of seeing the world, but at twenty-five she’s never even left Florida. Now a wedding invitation lures her to Quebec . . . in February. When her ex-friend Scarlett offers to be her plus-one (yeah, that’s a whole story) and suggests they turn the journey into an epic road trip, Megan reluctantly agrees to the biggest adventure of her life.A week together in a car is a surefire way to kill a crush, and Scarlett Andrews has had a big one on Megan for years. The important thing is fixing their friendship.As the miles roll away, what starts as harmless road-trip games and rest-stop dares escalates into something like intimacy. And when a surprise snowstorm forces Megan and Scarlett to hunker down without the open road as distraction, they’ve got a bigger challenge than making it to the church on time: facing the true nature of their feelings for each other.
Hairy Harold: Book 8 (My Freaky Family #8)
by Laurence AnholtMeet Harold - the hairiest of all Ruby's relations! Join Ruby and Harold as they continue the hilarious tour of their crazy family in this delightful new spin on Laurence Anholt's much-loved series. With the original fabulous illustrations by Tony Ross, these popular books have been refreshed for a vibrant and contemporary feel.
Hairy Maclary, Sit
by Lynley DoddMischievous Hairy Maclary finds that he is not in the mood for the Kennel Club's obedience class. Lynley Dodd, winner of numerous awards for her hugely popular series featuring Hairy Maclary and his many canine and feline friends, continues to entertain us with delightful rhyming text. Enjoy the entire Hairy Maclary collection as he and his mischevious companions explore their neighborhood. Gold Star First Readers are for children learning basic reading skills. The simple text incorporates repetition and rhyme to encourage and build confident readers.
Half Asleep in Frog Pajamas: A Novel
by Tom RobbinsWhen the stock market crashes on the Thursday before Easter, you—an ambitious, although ineffectual and not entirely ethical young broker—are convinced that you’re facing the Weekend from Hell. Before the market reopens on Monday, you’re going to have to scramble and scheme to cover your butt, but there’s no way you can anticipate the baffling disappearance of a 300-pound psychic, the fall from grace of a born-again monkey, or the intrusion in your life of a tattooed stranger intent on blowing your mind and most of your fuses. Over these fateful three days, you will be forced to confront everything from mysterious African rituals to legendary amphibians, from tarot-card bombshells to street violence, from your own sexuality to outer space. This is, after all, a Tom Robbins novel—and the author has never been in finer form.
Half Empty
by David RakoffThe inimitably witty David Rakoff, New York Times bestselling author of Don't Get Too Comfortable, defends the commonsensical notion that you should always assume the worst, because you'll never be disappointed. In this deeply funny (and, no kidding, wise and poignant) book, Rakoff examines the realities of our sunny; gushy; everyone-can-be-a-star contemporary culture and finds that, pretty much as a universal rule, the best is not yet to come, adversity will triumph, justice will not be served, and your dreams won't come true. The book ranges from the personal to the universal, combining stories from Rakoff's reporting and accounts of his own experiences: the moment when being a tiny child no longer meant adults found him charming but instead meant other children found him a fun target; the perfect late evening in Manhattan when he was young and the city seemed to brim with such possibility that the street shimmered in the moonlight - as he drew closer he realized the streets actually flickered with rats in a feeding frenzy. He also weaves in his usual brand Oscar Wilde-worthy cultural criticism (the tragedy of Hollywood's Walk of Fame, for instance). Whether he's lacerating the musical Rent for its cutesy depiction of AIDS or dealing with personal tragedy, his sharp observations and humorist's flair for the absurd will have you positively reveling in the power of negativity. From the Hardcover edition.
Half Life
by Lillian ClarkAn overachiever enrolls in an experimental clone study to prove that two (of her own) heads are better than one in this fast-paced, near-future adventure that's Black Mirror meets Becky Albertalli.There aren't enough hours in the day for Lucille--perfectionist, overachiever--to do everything she has to do, and there certainly aren't enough hours to hang out with friends, fall in love, get in trouble--all the teenage things she knows she should want to be doing instead of preparing for a flawless future. So when she sees an ad for Life2: Do more. Be more, she's intrigued. The company is looking for beta testers to enroll in an experimental clone program, and in the aftermath of a series of disappointments, Lucille is feeling reckless enough to jump in. At first, it's perfect: her clone, Lucy, is exactly what she needed to make her life manageable and have time for a social life. But it doesn't take long for Lucy to become more Lucy and less Lucille, and Lucille is forced to stop looking at Lucy as a reflection and start seeing her as a window--a glimpse at someone else living her own life, but better. Lucy does what she really wants to, not what she thinks she should want to, and Lucille is left wondering how much she was even a part of the perfect life she'd constructed for herself. Lucille wanted Lucy to help her relationships with everyone else, but how can she do that without first rectifying her relationship with herself?"Like a PG-13 mash-up of Booksmart and Black Mirror, Clark&’s sophomore novel delivers both twisty sci-fi suspense and a highly relatable account of the search for self-determination and self-worth."--Booklist"Clark makes this territory fresh, and teens questioning their own self-worth will be drawn to this novel. A novel that is near-future enough to appeal to sci-fi fans as well as general audiences who like to ask, 'What if?'"--SLJ
Half Moon Hill: A Novel (The Destiny Series #6)
by Toni BlakeUSA Today–bestselling Author: They came to Destiny to escape their pasts—and found a chance for a new future . . . A rugged loner and ex-biker-gang member, Duke Dawson is looking for some peace and quiet while recovering from an accident. But when Anna Romo comes wandering through his woods and into his cabin, she completely rocks his world. The last thing he expected or wanted was to find himself hungering after a woman whose eyes held hurt even deeper than his own . . . Running from a troubled past, Anna is building a new life in Destiny, Ohio. When she first meets Duke, she’s terrified—but something about him calls to her very soul. The hard-bodied rebel is soon helping her turn her new home into a bed and breakfast, and close quarters quickly lead them into her bed. Their passion is palpable, but can she convince a man who has turned his back on life to take the biggest leap of faith of all and fall in love?“Toni Blake’s romances are so delicious, so intoxicating and addictive, a good night’s sleep isn’t even an option.” —Robyn Carr, #1 New York Times–bestselling author of The House on Olive StreetPraise for the Destiny series“Captivating . . . [a] charming tale.” —Publishers Weekly (starred review)“Sexy, emotional, and filled with twists and turns.” —Susan Wiggs, New York Times–bestselling author of The Lost and Found Bookshop
Halfway to Crazy
by Mark ThriceEntertaining essays that find the funny side in everything from fatherhood to fishing to financial planning. This collection of the best and funniest columns published by syndicated humor columnist Mark Thrice takes a hilarious look at normal everyday life—from husbanding to parenting to holding down the job that is paying for both. With over fifty columns showcasing Mr. Thrice&’s witty and whimsical turns, this treasure produces laughs on every page.
Halfway to the Grave: A Night Huntress Novel (Night Huntress #1)
by Jeaniene FrostMeet the vampire world's supercouple Cat and Bones in this special 10th anniversary edition, with a "director's cut" collection of deleted scenes!"Cat and Bones are combustible together." - Charlaine HarrisHalf-vampire Catherine Crawfield is going after the undead with a vengeance, hoping that one of these deadbeats is her father—the one responsible for ruining her mother's life. Then she's captured by Bones, a vampire bounty hunter, and is forced into an unholy partnership.In exchange for finding her father, Cat agrees to train with the sexy night stalker until her battle reflexes are as sharp as his fangs. She's amazed she doesn't end up as his dinner—are there actually good vampires? Pretty soon Bones will have her convinced that being half-dead doesn't have to be all bad. But before she can enjoy her newfound status as kick-ass demon hunter, Cat and Bones are pursued by a group of killers. Now Cat will have to choose a side . . . and Bones is turning out to be as tempting as any man with a heartbeat.
Hall of Small Mammals: Stories
by Thomas Pierce'Ridiculously good...[There's a] feeling of being inside a bubble while reading Mr. Pierce, and it is a bubble you won't want to leave' Janet Maslin, New York TimesThe stories in Thomas Pierce's Hall of Small Mammals take place at the confluence of the commonplace and the cosmic, the intimate and the infinite. A fossil-hunter, a comedian, a hot- air balloon pilot, parents and children, believers and nonbelievers, the people in these stories are struggling to understand the absurdity and the magnitude of what it means to exist in a family, to exist in the world.In Shirley Temple Three, a mother must shoulder her son's burden - a cloned and resurrected woolly mammoth who wreaks havoc on her house, sanity, and faith. In The Real Alan Gass, a physicist in search of a mysterious particle called the 'daisy' spends her days with her boyfriend, Walker, and her nights with the husband who only exists in the world of her dreams, Alan Gass. Like the daisy particle itself - 'forever locked in a curious state of existence and nonexistence, sliding back and forth between the two' - the stories in Thomas Pierce's Hall of Small Mammals are exquisite, mysterious, and inextricably connected.From this enchanting primordial soup, Pierce's voice emerges - a distinct and charming testament of the New South, melding contemporary concerns with their prehistoric roots to create a hilarious, deeply moving collection of stories.
The Hallelujah Side: A Novel
by Rhoda Huffey&“It had been a Second Coming sky all day, which meant they might be in heaven by this evening.&” So begins the uproarious and tender tale of Roxanne Fish, daughter of Sister Zelda Fish and Pastor Winston Fish of the First Assembly of God Church of Ames, Iowa, who believe fervently in the imminent return of Jesus to take the Christians up to heaven. The Fishes&’ older daughter, Colleen, wants no part of their exuberant faith (&“Where are you going, young lady?&” &“To find my real family!&”), but Roxy longs to be saved even as she fears her sinful desires, such as marrying Elvis Presley when she grows up. If she grows up.Roxy lives in a world populated by angels with blue noses and demons who follow her around whispering &“God doesn&’t like you.&” And sinners, sinners everywhere, easily identifiable by their makeup and capri pants and knowledge of television programs. Her soul&’s journey through this wicked world to her own particular salvation—with an assist from the Queen of Soul herself, Aretha Franklin—is unforgettable. Rhoda Huffey&’s affection for her characters shines in every line. She handles large themes with a sure hand, perfect comic timing, and an utter originality that make The Hallelujah Side a joy.
The Hallo-Wiener
by Dav PilkeyFrom Dav Pilkey, creator of the New York Times bestselling Dog Man and Captain Underpants series, comes Oscar, a little dog with a big bullying problem.Oscar is a little dog with a big problem -- he gets more tricks than treats because other dogs tease him all the time. But one brave act on Halloween makes Oscar a Grade-A hero, proving that a little wiener can be a real winner!
The Halloween Costume Countdown
by Maggie MurphyWith Alligator's Halloween party starting in two hours, Cat and Mouse think up ideas of costumes.
¡Un Halloween de miedo! (Daniela DivertiGuay #Volumen 2)
by Daniela DivertiGuayA Daniela le encantan las fiestas y si es con sus primas Valeria y Martina, y con todas sus amigas, ¡MEJOR QUE MEJOR! ¡Prepárate para la aventura más tenebrosa... y DivertiGuay! Se acerca Halloween y es la mejor oportunidad para montar una celebración INOLVIDABLE. Hay que pensarlo bien para que todo salga perfecto: los mejores disfraces del mundo, todo el maquillaje necesario y un montón de chuches con MUCHO MISTERIO...
¡Un Halloween de miedo! (El pequeño Leo Da Vinci #7)
by Christian Gálvez¿Quieres ser un genio?Pues no te pierdas las divertidísimas y trepidantes aventuras del pequeño Leo Da Vinci y sus amigos Lisa, Miguel Ángel, Chiara, Boti, Rafa y Spaghetto. La fiesta de Halloween se acerca y Vlad, «el Empalador», conde de Transilvania, ha reunido a los monstruos más terroríficos de medio mundo para celebrarlo. Además ha secuestrado a Violet, la hermana de Emil, un vampirito con un solo colmillo. Para rescatarla, Emil pedirá ayuda a Leo y su pandilla, que se encuentran enfrascados en un nuevo invento: un carro que funciona con boñigas de vaca. ¿Podrán rescatarla antes de que Vlad la convierta en vampiro? Y es que ser vampiro en estos días... ¡¡es muy chungo!! Y, además, agudiza al máximo tus neuronas y resuelve un montón de enigmas!
Halloween, Here I Come! (Here I Come!)
by D.J. SteinbergKick off your Halloween night with these festive poems from the author of Kindergarten, Here I Come!From choosing the best costume and going out trick-or-treating to sorting your candy and dealing with the results after you've eaten too much, author D. J. Steinberg captures the slightly shivery as well as festive moments of Halloween in this collection of playful poems.
Halloween in Paradise (The Tj Jensen Mysteries #6)
by Kathi DaleyAt a high school reunion, who is ‘Most Likely to Be the Killer’? A sleuthing PE teacher must find out in this mystery by the USA Today–bestselling author . . . In the midst of the annual Halloween frenzy, Tj Jensen finds herself pulled into a series of events at the Nevada high school where she works. She must help not only the girl on her team who’s being cyberbullied, but also a student who’s recently suffered a personal tragedy. And as if Tj wasn’t busy enough, in walks Samantha Colton, a reporter for Second Look, a television series that takes a look back at unsolved murders. This time the cold case is the death of a popular student after the homecoming dance ten years before. To make matters even worse—or maybe more convenient—the graduating class of the victim is in town for their ten-year reunion and all the suspects just happen to have converged on Serenity for the weekend. When the TV reporter turns up dead, Tj must track down someone who seems willing to kill again to keep their secret . . . “Daley’s characters come to life on the page. Her novels are filled with a little mystery and a little romance which makes for a murderous adventure.” —Tonya Kappes, USA Today–bestselling author of Fixin’ To Die
Halloween Invaders! (The Secret World of Alex Mack #20)
by John Vornholt Esther M. FriesnerParadise Valley is up in arms with the scare of a UFO. Sadly, Alex's superpowers quit, leaving her a walking, jelly-like creature. Alex has to get home to fix herself, but how can she with half the town on her trail?
A Halloween Mystery! (Little Golden Book)
by David CroattoCelebrate Halloween with Mystery Inc., the DC Super Heroes, Tom & Jerry, and the Looney Tunes in this Little Golden Book cross over event that brings all of Warner Bros.&’ most iconic characters together!It&’s Halloween night, and everyone&’s favorite Warner Bros. characters are having a haunted house decorating competition! But when the houses get sabotaged, can super sleuths Daphne and Velma get to the bottom of the mystery before it&’s time for the judging?For the first time, iconic Warner Bros. and DC characters such as the DC Super Heroes, Scooby-Doo and Mystery Inc., the Looney Tunes, Tom & Jerry, and more are interacting together in this fun Halloween Little Golden Book—perfect for kids ages 2 to 5 and Warner Bros., DC, and Hanna-Barbera fans of all ages!
The Halloween Party from the Black Lagoon (Black Lagoon Adventures #5)
by Mike ThalerThese fun-filled chapter books mix school, monsters, and common kid problems with hilarious results. You'll scream with laughter!Hubie is about to scream. He doesn't have a costume for the scariest Halloween costume party ever. Too bad he can't just go as the invisible man and stay at home. Plus, there's going to be a ton of monsters at the party. He better find a costume quick or become a tasty treat for all those cruel ghouls!
Halloweenies
by David Wisniewski"Get ready to shriek...with laughter! Within these covers lurk five horror spoofs just waiting to tickle your funny bone. Can it survive the shaggy shenanigans of "Frankenstein's Hamster"? Can it endure the galactic giggles of "Attack of the Space Toupees"? Yes, you say... Well, grab your popcorn! The lights are going down! The curtains are going up! It's time for the first showing of... " Publishers Weekly In five stories modeled on creature-feature movies, Wisniewski, working more in the vein of his The Secret Knowledge of Grown-Ups than his Caldecott-winning Golem, [available from Bookshare] warms up old gags. Pen-and-inks of three movie-going boys imply the intended audience, and so do lowbrow jokes about a castle's "big buttress" and a sherpa named "Duk Pin Bo Ling." A pushy cosmetologist turns a werewolf into a "werewuss," and, in "Attack of the Space Toupees," the wives of exclusively male government officials thwart a UFO plot (the vanquished aliens respond with sinister "space girdles"). Ages 7-up. Pictures are described. Other books by David Wisniewski are available from Bookshare.