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How to Survive University: An Essential Pocket Guide
by Tamsin KingWhether your passion is society life, studying or shots, your university experience will hold both new adventures and fresh challenges. This guide is packed with tips to help you survive and thrive at uni, from pulling an all-nighter in the library to an all-nighter at the club.
How to Survive University
by Clive Whichelow Mike HaskinsAt last, no more parents! But who’s going to do your washing, and bail you out when you’re short of cash? Hmm, you’re going to need survival skills. This mischievous little book will help you see through your university years with tongue-in-cheek advice and cheeky illustrations.
How to Survive University
by Clive Whichelow Mike HaskinsAt last, no more parents! But who’s going to do your washing, and bail you out when you’re short of cash? Hmm, you’re going to need survival skills. This mischievous little book will help you see through your university years with tongue-in-cheek advice and cheeky illustrations.
How to Survive Without Grown-Ups (How to Survive #1)
by Larry HayesGet set for the new hilarious out-of-this-world adventure series for readers aged 8+ – this is the perfect new series for fans of Tom Gates, David Solomons and Star Wars! Highly illustrated throughout by the brilliantly funny Katie Abey. Mum and Dad have left – gone to Mars, and they&’re never coming back . . . FREEDOM AT LAST! But this isn&’t one of Dad&’s weird jokes; it&’s REAL. It&’s up to ten-year-old Eliza and her genius little brother, Johnnie, to find out what&’s going on, and launch a rescue . . . Can they handle vampire squids, a suspicious villain, a secret island full of traps and a trip into space? And – more importantly – will they ever get their parents back? The funniest, zaniest, most out-of-this-world adventure you&’ll read all year!
How to Swear: An Illustrated Guide
by Stephen WildishEven the most profane practitioner of the vulgar tongue must sometimes wonder, "Am I doing it right?" This highly entertaining and crucially informative visual guide to the art of swearing employs a variety of quick-read charts and helpful strategies to take salty skills to the next level. Offering history and etymology along with guidance, quips, insults, answers to lingering questions, and much more, How to Swear celebrates the rude ingenuity of using a naughty word to express surprise, excitement, anger, joy, or disgust, limited only by the imagination. It's inspiring. It's educational. It's dirty. It's here to change lives or, at the very least, add some f*#&ing color to the conversation.
How to Swear Around the World
by Jason SacherWith this helpful guide, learn to tell people off like a native no matter where you are in the world.An essential phrasebook for the world traveler, How to Swear Around the World features dozens of favorite curses, insults, and sayings from all over the globe. Get rid of a pesky hanger-on in Brazil by telling him to dig for potatoes—vai ceifar batatas. To express disgust toward your brown-nosing German friend, accuse him of being a bicycle-rider—radfahrer, or tell someone off in Laos by letting him know you think his mother enjoys keeping intimate company with dogs—Ma see mea mung! Make new friends and enemies abroad with this handy guide filled with fighting words, scatological expressions, dozens of ways to insult someone’s mother, and many other suitably offensive phrases.Also features phonetic pronunciations and handy illustrations to provide guidance to these colorful exclamations.“As useful as it is hilarious, Sacher’s How to Swear Around the World teaches readers all kinds of vulgar phrases in dozens of different languages. Feel free to call Expedia and curse out their airfare prices using any of the book’s quotes.” —Complex.com
How to Take Over the World: Practical Schemes and Scientific Solutions for the Aspiring Supervillain
by Ryan North&“Comic book fans will fall hard for this delightfully daffy guidebook. . . . Exuberant, optimistic, and just plain fun, How to Take Over the World will both surprise and delight.&” —EsquireA book this informative should be a crime!Taking over the world is a lot of work. Any supervillain is bound to have questions: What&’s the perfect location for a floating secret base? What zany heist will fund my wildly ambitious plans? How do I control the weather, destroy the internet, and never, ever die? Bestselling author and award-winning comics writer Ryan North has the answers. In this introduction to the science of comic-book supervillainy, he details a number of outlandish villainous schemes that harness the potential of today&’s most advanced technologies. Picking up where How to Invent Everything left off, his explanations are as fun and elucidating as they are completely absurd. You don&’t have to be a criminal mastermind to share a supervillain&’s interest in cutting-edge science and technology. This book doesn&’t just reveal how to take over the world—it also shows how you could save it. This sly guide to some of the greatest threats facing humanity accessibly explores emerging techniques to extend human life spans, combat cyberterrorism, communicate across millennia, and finally make Jurassic Park a reality.
How to Take the Ex Out of Ex-Boyfriend
by Janette RallisonBoyfriends are supposed to be loyal, caring, and handsome. Giovanna's boyfriend, Jesse, has perfected the last two. But when her twin brother, Dante, runs for student body president, Jesse doesn't support Dante, choosing to campaign for his opponent instead. Shouldn't the fact that Jesse is Giovanna's boyfriend count for something? So Giovanna dumps Jesse and becomes Dante's campaign manager. But as the political debates heat up, Giovanna begins to regret breaking up with Jesse, and realizes that maybe her decision wasn't the political strategy she should have used. . . .
How to Take Your Time: from How Proust Can Change Your Life
by Alain De BottonCuriously practical—this no-nonsense blend of literary biography and self-help unravels how interesting life can be if only you could resist the impulse to rush through the mundane rituals of modern life. Every morning, Marcel Proust sipped his two cups of strong coffee with milk, ate a croissant from one boulangerie, dunking it in his coffee as he slowly read the day’s paper with great care—poring over each headline and section. Only Alain de Botton could have pulled so many useful insights from the oeuvre of one the world’s greatest literary masters. Fascinating and vital, How to Take Your Time will urge you to find the wisdom in defying “the self-satisfaction felt by ‘busy’ men—however idiotic their business—at ‘not having time’ to do what you are doing.” A Vintage Shorts Wellness selection. An ebook short.
How to Talk Dirty and Influence People: An Autobiography
by Lenny Bruce Lewis Black Howard ReichDuring the course of a career that began in the late 1940s, Lenny Bruce challenged the sanctity of organized religion and other societal and political conventions and widened the boundaries of free speech. Critic Ralph Gleason said, "So many taboos have been lifted and so many comics have rushed through the doors Lenny opened. He utterly changed the world of comedy.” He died in 1966 at the age of 40. His influence on the worlds of comedy, jazz, and satire is incalculable, and How to Talk Dirty and Influence People--now republished to coincide with the 50th anniversary of Lenny Bruce's death--remains a brilliant existential account of his life and the forces that made him the most important and controversial entertainer in history.
How to Talk Like a Chicken
by Charlie GrandyFrom the duo behind How to Talk Like a Bear comes a hilarious new picture book!You may think talking like a chicken is all clucking and bawking and flapping your arms, but it's actually far more complicated than that. Like all languages, it has many intricacies. For example, chickens also peep and ruffle their feathers. Very complex.Told in the same fourth-wall-breaking style of How to Talk Like a Bear, a hilarious little chicken guides the reader through important phrases and situations so that all readers are prepared to wow their family members and various farm animals with their perfect chicken prose. It may even come in handy in the off chance a peaceful farm is threatened by a menacing fox!How to Talk Like a Chicken is a perfect read-aloud and a great gift for any child looking to expand their worldview into the vast culture of the Chicken language.
How to Talk Minnesotan: Revised for the 21st Century
by Howard MohrA revised edition of the hilarious Minnesotan culture guide from a former writer for A Prairie Home Companion Fans of the Minnesota-set movie Fargo will love this uproarious culture guide to all-things Minnesotan. With his dry wit and distinctive voice, Howard Mohr won millions of fans across the country on Garrison Keillor’s radio show A Prairie Home Companion. His popular commercials and ad spots, including one for “Minnesota Language Systems,” became the best of the best of Minnesota humor. Now, Mohr has updated his classic guide, How to Talk Minnesotan, to advise visitors on the use of Twitter and Facebook, cell phone etiquette, and more while in the Land of 10,000 Lakes. .
How to Talk to a Widower: A Novel
by Jonathan Tropper"Beautifully crafted", "Fantastically funny." "Compulsively readable." Jonathan Tropper has earned wild acclaim---and comparisons to Nick Hornby and Tom Perrotta--for his biting humor and insightful portrayals of families in crisis and men behaving badly. Now the acclaimed author of The Book of Joe and Everything Changes tackles love, lust, and lost in the suburbs--in a stunning novel that is by turns heartfelt and riotously funny.Doug Parker is a widower at age twenty-nine, and in his quiet suburban town, that makes him something of a celebrity--the object of sympathy, curiosity, and, in some cases, unbridled desire. But Doug has other things on his mind. First there's his sixteen year-old stepson, Russ: a once-sweet kid who now is getting into increasingly serious trouble on a daily basis. Then there are Doug's sisters: his bossy twin, Clair, who's just left he husband and moved in with Doug, determined to rouse him from his Grieving stupor. And Debbie, who's engaged to Doug's ex-best friend and manically determined to pull off the perfect wedding at any cost.Soon Doug's entire nuclear family is in his face. And when he starts dipping his toes into the shark-infested waters of the second-time around dating scene, it isn't long before his new life is spinning hopelessly out of control, cutting a harrowing and often hilarious swath of sexual missteps and escalating chaos across the suburban landscape.From the Hardcover edition.
How to Talk to Dads
by Alec Greven Kei AcederaNever underestimate the power of the father! You may think you know all the tricks, but ten-year-old Alec Greven knows that when it comes to dads, you have to be on your toes. Some dads are strict, and some are easygoing, but they all have a good side and a bad side. What you get totally depends on Dad's mood and your attitude. So no matter how old you are or how tight you are with the big guy, trust Alec to help you get down to the bottom of what makes your dad tick. Tips: There is an 80 percent chance your dad will say yes when your mom says no. Video games calm Dad down and put him in a better mood. If you think Dad is going to let you run wild, you are wrong!
How to Talk to Girls
by Alec Greven Kei AcederaAre you smart enough to take over a girl's heart? Leave it to a nine-year-old to get down to the basics about how to win victory with a girl. How to talk to girls is for boys of all ages--from eight to eighty--and the girls they like. So read this book and then you're ready. Good luck! Tips: Comb your hair and don't wear sweats Control your hyperness (cut down on the sugar if you have to) Don't act desperate
How to Talk to Moms
by Alec Greven Kei AcederaSometimes your mom seems like the most wonderful woman in the world. Sometimes you think she is mean and wants to ruin your life. Really, it is both. No matter how well you know your mom, chances are she's got a few tricks up her sleeve. Alec Greven may only be ten, but he will set you straight when it comes to figuring out the most important woman in your life. Tips: Don't use your shirt as a napkin or a Kleenex. Don't bring loose wildlife into the house-ever! Your mom will always love you no matter what.
How to Talk to Santa
by Alec Greven Kei AcederaHow do you control your greed, still get what you want, and spread the cheer? Get ready. Santa's almost here! Ten-year-old Alec Greven is the boy to turn to for advice about the jolly guy in the red suit. He knows it's easy to go wild when Santa is on his way and explains how to avoid Santa-trouble. But there's more to Christmas than want, want, want, and Alec reminds us of the greater meaning--giving to others and spreading joy! Tips: There is a 99.999999999% chance that you will never catch Santa. My advice is: Don't risk it! Don't whine now--whine later. December 26 is National Whiners' Day. You can be 100 and still believe.
How To Talk To A Widower: A Richard and Judy bookclub choice
by Jonathan TropperA stunning novel of love, loss, laughter and too much bourbon from the author of THIS IS WHERE I LEAVE YOU.When Doug married Hailey - beautiful, smart and ten years older - he left his carefree Manhattan life to live in the suburbs with Hailey and her teenage son, Russ. Three years later, at 29, Doug has been a widower for twelve months and just wants to drown himself in self-pity and Jack Daniels. But his family has other ideas...Russ is furious with Doug for not adopting him, and has fallen in with a bad crowd. Claire, Doug's irrepressible, pregnant twin sister, has left her husband and, uninvited, moved in with Doug. And their sister Debbie is determined to have the perfect wedding, at any cost. Soon, Doug finds himself trying to forge a relationship with Russ, reconnect with his own eccentric family, and reluctantly edges back into the complicated world of dating...
How To Talk To A Widower: A Richard and Judy bookclub choice
by Jonathan TropperWhen Doug married Hailey - beautiful, smart and ten years older - he left his carefree Manhattan life to live in the suburbs with Hailey and her teenage son, Russ. Three years later, at 29, Doug has been a widower for twelve months and just wants to drown himself in self-pity and Jack Daniels. But his family has other ideas...Russ is furious with Doug for not adopting him, and has fallen in with a bad crowd. Claire, Doug's irrepressible, pregnant twin sister, has left her husband and, uninvited, moved in with Doug. And their sister Debbie is determined to have the perfect wedding, at any cost. Soon, Doug finds himself trying to forge a relationship with Russ, reconnect with his own eccentric family, and reluctantly edges back into the complicated world of dating...(p) 2007 Brilliance Audio
How to Talk to Your Cat About Gun Safety: And Abstinence, Drugs, Satanism, and Other Dangers That Threaten Their Nine Lives
by Zachary AuburnThe cats of America are under siege! Long gone are the good old days when a cat's biggest worries were mean dogs or a bath. Modern cats must confront satanists, online predators, the possibility of needing to survive in a post-apocalyptic wasteland, and countless other threats to their nine lives. For over four decades, the American Association of Patriots have stood at the vanguard of our country's defense by helping to prepare our nation's cat owners for the difficult conversations they dread having with their pets. Written in a simple Q&A format, How to Talk to Your Cat About Gun Safety answers crucial questions such as, "What is the right age to talk to my cat about the proper use of firearms?" and "What are the benefits of my cat living a lifestyle of abstinence?" and especially "Why does my cat need to use the internet? Can't he just play with yarn like cats used to do?" Our country--and our cats--stand at a precipice. It will take courage, and it will take hard work, but armed with the knowledge within these pages, we can make our cats--and America--great again!From the Trade Paperback edition.
How to Talk to Your Cat About Gun Safety: and Abstinence, Drugs, Satanism, and Other Dangers That Threaten Their Nine Lives
by Zachary AuburnLong gone are the good old days when a cat's biggest worries were mean dogs or a bath. Modern cats must confront satanists, online predators, the possibility of needing to survive in a post-apocalyptic wasteland, and countless other threats to their nine lives.For over four decades, the American Association of Patriots have stood at the vanguard of our country's defense by helping to prepare our nation's cat owners for the difficult conversations they dread having with their pets. Written in a simple Q&A format, HOW TO TALK TO YOUR CAT ABOUT GUN SAFETY answers crucial questions such as, 'What is the right age to talk to my cat about the proper use of firearms?' and 'What are the benefits of my cat living a lifestyle of abstinence?' and especially 'Why does my cat need to use the internet? Can't he just play with yarn like cats used to do?'America - and our cats - stand at a precipice. It will take courage, and it will take hard work, but armed with the knowledge within these pages, we can make our cats - and America - great again!
How to Tame Your Cat: Tongue-in-Cheek Advice for Keeping Your Furry Friend Under Control
by Sam HartA fully illustrated book of tongue-in-cheek advice for cat parents who struggle to tame their cat's inner beastHaving a cat can be such a joy. Little compares to the delight of cuddles on the couch, the sound of gentle purring, or the fun of playtime. But what do you do when your furry friend starts scratching all the furniture, ruining the flower beds, stealing your food and generally wreaking havoc?Luckily, this entertaining guide is here with top tips and tricks to tame your cat when the wild beast comes out, so you can spend more time giving head scritches and less time worrying about the state of your curtains.Become an elite cat parent with these nuggets of wisdom: If you're worried about items crashing to the floor, attach ornaments with string and they won't make such a satisfying "THUNK" noiseCity cats love the daily discipline of being taken for a walk; give it a try and observe the calming effect it has on themInstall a security-grade toilet-paper guard to avoid unsolicited homemade confetti
How to Tame Your Cat: Tongue-in-Cheek Advice for Keeping Your Furry Friend Under Control
by Sam HartA fully illustrated book of tongue-in-cheek advice for cat parents who struggle to tame their cat's inner beastHaving a cat can be such a joy. Little compares to the delight of cuddles on the couch, the sound of gentle purring, or the fun of playtime. But what do you do when your furry friend starts scratching all the furniture, ruining the flower beds, stealing your food and generally wreaking havoc?Luckily, this entertaining guide is here with top tips and tricks to tame your cat when the wild beast comes out, so you can spend more time giving head scritches and less time worrying about the state of your curtains.Become an elite cat parent with these nuggets of wisdom: If you're worried about items crashing to the floor, attach ornaments with string and they won't make such a satisfying "THUNK" noiseCity cats love the daily discipline of being taken for a walk; give it a try and observe the calming effect it has on themInstall a security-grade toilet-paper guard to avoid unsolicited homemade confetti
How to Teach Classics to Your Dog: A Quirky Introduction to the Ancient Greeks and Romans
by Philip WomackIt should have been a beautiful moment between a man and his dog. Philip Womack made a quip about Cerberus, the three-headed hell-hound, but for Una, the beloved lurcher, it was all Greek. Then she ran off after a squirrel. And Womack was left to wonder what else she didn&’t know about the great civilisations of the past. The Greeks and the Romans laid the foundations of so much of what we read, listen to and watch today, from the baked pies of Game of Thrones to the Lotus-eaters of Love Island. In this unique introduction, Womack leads Una and us on a fleet-footed odyssey through the classical world. You&’ll learn to tell your Odysseus from your Oedipus, your Polyxena from your Polydorus…but the story of the hunting dogs that tore their own master apart may be best left for another day.
How to Teach Philosophy to Your Dog: Exploring The Big Questions In Life
by Anthony McGowanBecause man’s best friend deserves to know the secrets of how to live a good life, too. Monty was just like any other dog. A scruffy and irascible Maltese terrier, he enjoyed barking at pugs and sniffing at trees. But after yet another dramatic confrontation with the local Rottweiler, Anthony McGowan realizes it’s high time he and Monty had a chat about what makes him a good or a bad dog. Taking his lead from Monty’s canine antics, McGowan takes us on a hilarious and enlightening jaunt through the major debates of philosophy. Will Kant convince Monty to stop stealing cheesecake? How long will they put up with Socrates poking holes in every argument? In this uniquely entertaining take on morality and ethics, the dutiful duo set out to uncover who—if anyone—has the right end of the ethical stick and can tell us how best to live one’s life.