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Aliens for Lunch
by Stephanie Spinner Jonathan Etra Steve BjorkmanRichard Bickerstaff and his friend Henry are prisoners on Grax, a hostile planet. Aric, their tiny alien friend, has been taken from them--perhaps forever. And now they're eating lunch in a Graxian jail, face to face with a Turinga Death Machine! Can life get any more dangerous? Kids will love this very funny Stepping Stones HUMOR title!From the Trade Paperback edition.
Aliens in Disguise (The Intergalactic Bed and Breakfast)
by Clete Barrett SmithBook 3 in the warm-hearted, hilarious Intergalactic Bed & Breakfast series.When David's grandma wins a hotelier award and goes to accept it on another planet, security officer Tate assumes full control of the Intergalactic Bed & Breakfast. His decision to put the alien tourists on total lockdown doesn't go over well, however, and most of the guests vacate. Tate decides to retrieve Grandma, leaving David and his friend Amy home alone. Running the B& B when there are only a few guests should be a breeze, especially for two kids who saved the universe just a few weeks ago. But soon David and Amy (and alien pooch, Snarflle) are faced with such problems as a lost alien, a pair of gate-crashers, and a potential horde of UFO-watchers descending on the inn. Middle grade readers will be over the moon about this third kooky comedy featuring an assortment of hapless humans and admirable aliens.
Aliens on Vacation (The Intergalactic Bed and Breakfast #1)
by Clete Barrett Smith13-year-old David discovers that his grandmother's inn is a portal for comical aliens from all over the universe---a secret that, until now, she has been able to keep from her small town.Scrub isn't happy about having to spend the summer with his hippie grandmother in "Middle of Nowhere," Washington. When he arrives at her Intergalactic Bed & Breakfast, he's not surprised by its 1960s-meets-Star Wars decor; but he is surprised by the weird looking guests. It turns out that each room in the inn is a portal and his grandma is the gatekeeper, allowing aliens to vacation on Earth. She desperately needs Scrub's help with disguising the tourists as humans. As if that weren't difficult enough, the town sheriff is already suspicious of Granny. One wrong move and Scrub could blow Grandma's cover, forcing the B&B to shut down forever. And when it comes to aliens, every move seems wrong . . .Full of cosmic chaos and mind-bending mayhem, Scrub's summer adventure will leave readers wanting to make a return trip.
Aliens, Underwear, and Monsters (Sixth-Grade Alien #11)
by Bruce CovillePleskit and Tim are the butt of the joke in this eleventh book in the hilarious, fast-paced, and accessible sci-fi series Sixth-Grade Alien from the bestselling author of Aliens Ate My Homework, Bruce Coville!When Tim comes home and finds a two-foot-tall orange alien named Beebo Frimbat sitting on his desk, he knows he&’s in for a hard time. After all, Beebo is a dedicated mischief maker who thinks trouble is the spice of life. But even Beebo&’s past pranks don&’t prepare Tim for finding his underwear flying from the school flagpole. Still, it&’s all in good fun. Or is it? Do Beebo&’s pranks have anything to do with the plan to derail the mission of The Fatherly One? And is it really just an accident when Beebo locks Pleskit&’s bodyguard in an alternate dimension populated by man-eating monsters? Previously titled There&’s an Alien in My Underwear.
Aliento perruno (Spanish Language Edition of Dog Breath): El horrible problema de Hali Tosis
by Dav PilkeyFrom Dav Pilkey, creator of the New York Times bestselling Dog Man and Captain Underpants series, comes Hally Tosis, the adorable dog that will take your breath away!Hali Tosis es una perra magnífica, pero hay algo podrido en ella: ¡su aliento! Este apesta tanto que los dueños de Hali planean buscarle un nuevo hogar. Los niños, desesperados por conservar a su querida mascota, intentan de todo para deshacerse del apestoso aliento de Hali. La llevan a ver unas vistas maravillosas y una película emocionante, y también a dar un paseo en la montaña rusa, todo lo cual debería dejarla sin aliento, ¡pero la respiración putrefacta de Hali se mantiene! ¡Solo un milagro podría salvarla ahora!Hally Tosis is a great family dog, but there is one rotten thing about her: her breath! It is so smelly, Hally's pet parents want to find a new home for her. The children, desperate to keep their beloved pet, try everything to rid Hally of her stinky stench. They take her for a breathtaking view, a movie that would leave her breathless, and a ride on a roller coaster that would make her lose her breath, but Hally's putrid panting persists! Only a miracle could save her now!
Alistair and Kip's Great Adventure!
by John SegalOne bossy cat. One nervous beagle. Two best friends. When Alistair and Kip set out to sea, they quickly find themselves in deep water. Who will come to the rescue? Join them and have a whale of a time in John Segal's charming tale of adventure and friendship.
Alive and Wells: A Wells Ranch Novel
by Bailey HannahA city girl fleeing an abusive marriage suddenly finds herself working on a cattle ranch with a sexy but grumpy rancher as her boss in this spicy cowboy romance from the author of Seeing Red and Change of Hart.He&’s worried she won&’t stay. She&’s worried she will.City girl Cecily Kennedy never expected to step foot on a cattle ranch, but when her already strained marriage takes a violent turn, a kind friend offers her a job and refuge at Wells Ranch.Ranch life is hard enough without her new boss, Austin Wells, sending mixed signals about whether he wants her or hates her. But Cecily can&’t risk getting involved with her grumpy yet alluring employer—she has nowhere else to go, and getting over her ex by getting under Austin isn&’t worth the potential fallout.As far as Austin&’s concerned, Cecily won&’t be sticking around for long. He&’s learned the hard way that nobody ever stays, and the indent on her ring finger makes him certain the sexy city gal is no exception.But when Cecily&’s troubled past threatens her safe haven, Austin realizes that somewhere between their trail rides and late night talks, she&’s branded herself on his heart. He desperately wants her to stay, and whether or not she feels the same, he&’ll be damned if he lets anyone or anything hurt her under his watch.Don&’t miss any of Bailey Hannah&’s steamy Wells Ranch series: ALIVE AND WELLS • SEEING RED • CHANGE OF HART
Alive and Wells: A Wells Ranch Novel - Book 1
by Bailey HannahA city girl fleeing an abusive marriage suddenly finds herself working on a cattle ranch with a sexy but grumpy rancher as her boss in this spicy cowboy romance from the author of Seeing Red and Change of Hart.He's worried she won't stay. She's worried she will.City girl Cecily Kennedy never expected to step foot on a cattle ranch, but when her already strained marriage takes a violent turn, a kind friend offers her a job and refuge at Wells Ranch.Ranch life is hard enough without her new boss, Austin Wells, sending mixed signals about whether he wants her or hates her. But Cecily can't risk getting involved with her grumpy yet alluring employer—she has nowhere else to go, and getting over her ex by getting under Austin isn't worth the potential fallout.As far as Austin's concerned, Cecily won't be sticking around for long. He's learned the hard way that nobody ever stays, and the indent on her ring finger makes him certain the sexy city gal is no exception.But when Cecily's troubled past threatens her safe haven, Austin realizes that somewhere between their trail rides and late night talks, she's branded herself on his heart. He desperately wants her to stay, and whether or not she feels the same, he'll be damned if he lets anyone or anything hurt her under his watch.Don't miss any of Bailey Hannah's steamy Wells Ranch series: ALIVE AND WELLS • SEEING RED • CHANGE OF HART
All Aboard!
by Rebecca Kai DotlichFrom the creators of What Can a Crane Pick Up? comes a train-ride adventure—perfect for fans of Thomas the Tank Engine and Goodnight, Goodnight, Construction Site. In this inviting, rhyming read-aloud, two kids become travel buddies as they watch cities and landscapes and other hard-working trains rush by, and also observe the conductor and funny goings-on inside the train, all illustrated in a fresh, hip, colorful style. Hop aboard!"The chugga-chugga beat and appealing anthropomorphized trains will charm young train-lovers in this entertaining title that&’s a perfect fit for storytime."--Booklist
All About Evie
by Matson TaylorEVIE EPWORTH IS TEN YEARS OLDER. BUT IS SHE ANY WISER?! 'An absolute ray of sunshine of a book' Libby Page, author of The LidoPraise for The Miseducation of Evie Epworth &‘Tight, clever and riddled with wit. Like discovering Adrian Mole or Bridget Jones for the first time.&’ Joanna Nadin, author of The Queen of Bloody Everything &‘A sweet, fizzy sherbet dib-dab of a book - deliciously nostalgic, hugely funny and ultimately heartwarming. The perfect book for our times.&’ Veronica Henry &‘Such a joyful and uplifting read. Just the sort of thing that people will want to be reading right now.&’ Anita Rani, Radio 2 Book Club 'Full of fabulous characters, sprinkled with joy and drenched in wit.' Milly Johnson 1972. Ten years on from the events of The Miseducation of Evie Epworth and Evie is settled in London working for the BBC. She has everything she's ever dreamed of (a career, a leatherette briefcase, an Ossie Clark poncho) but, following an unfortunate incident involving Princess Anne and a Hornsea Pottery mug, she finds herself having to rethink her life and piece together work, love, grief and multiple pairs of cork-soled platform sandals. Ghosts from the past and the spirit of the future collide in a joyous adventure that sees Evie navigate the choppy waters of her messy twenties. Can a 1960s miseducation prepare her for the growing pains of the 1970s? Big-hearted, uplifting, bittersweet and tender, All About Evie is a novel fizzing with wit and alive to the power of friendship in all its forms.
All About Me!: My Remarkable Life in Show Business
by Mel BrooksAt 95, the legendary Mel Brooks continues to set the standard for comedy across television, film, and the stage. Now, for the first time, this EGOT (Emmy, Grammy, Oscar, Tony) winner shares his story in his own words. <P><P>“Laugh-out-loud hilarious and always fascinating, from the great Mel Brooks. What else do you expect from the man who knew Jesus and dated Joan of Arc?&”—Billy Crystal <P><P>For anyone who loves American comedy, the long wait is over. Here are the never-before-told, behind-the-scenes anecdotes and remembrances from a master storyteller, filmmaker, and creator of all things funny. <P><P>All About Me! charts Mel Brooks’s meteoric rise from a Depression-era kid in Brooklyn to the recipient of the National Medal of Arts. Whether serving in the United States Army in World War II, or during his burgeoning career as a teenage comedian in the Catskills, Mel was always mining his experiences for material, always looking for the perfect joke. His iconic career began with Sid Caesar’s Your Show of Shows, where he was part of the greatest writers&’ room in history, which included Carl Reiner, Neil Simon, and Larry Gelbart. After co-creating both the mega-hit 2000 Year Old Man comedy albums and the classic television series Get Smart, Brooks’s stellar film career took off. He would go on to write, direct, and star in The Producers, The Twelve Chairs, Blazing Saddles, Young Frankenstein, Silent Movie, High Anxiety, and Spaceballs, as well as produce groundbreaking and eclectic films, including The Elephant Man, The Fly, and My Favorite Year. Brooks then went on to conquer Broadway with his record-breaking, Tony-winning musical, The Producers. All About Me! offers fans insight into the inspiration behind the ideas for his outstanding collection of boundary-breaking work, and offers details about the many close friendships and collaborations Brooks had, including those with Sid Caesar, Carl Reiner, Gene Wilder, Madeleine Kahn, Alfred Hitchcock, and the great love of his life, Anne Bancroft. Filled with tales of struggle, achievement, and camaraderie (and dozens of photographs), readers will gain a more personal and deeper understanding of the incredible body of work behind one of the most accomplished and beloved entertainers in history. <P><P><b>A New York Times Best Seller</b>
All About the Trolls (Step into Reading)
by Kristen L. DepkenTROLLS hits theaters everywhere on November 4, 2016!DreamWorks Animation&’s TROLLS is an irreverent comedy extravaganza with incredible music! From the genius creators of SHREK, TROLLS stars Poppy, the optimistic leader of the Trolls, and her polar opposite, Branch.Together, this unlikely pair of Trolls must embark on an adventure that takes them far beyond the only world they&’ve ever known. This Step 3 Step into Reading leveled reader is perfect for boys and girls ages 4 to 6!
All Alone in a Sea of Romance
by B. G. ThomasI'm Jude Parks, writer of gay romances. Even though I'm good at what I do, the irony is that I haven't exactly been lucky in love. My friend Jeannie says it's because I settle for Mr. Right Now instead of holding out for Mr. Forever. I say I'd rather regret what I have done than what I haven't. I only came to Romantic Voyages, the biggest romance convention in the country, for business. Yet in no time I got mixed up with a gorgeous cover model, weeping artists, drag queens, and crazy housewives--and became the prime suspect in a murder investigation. Well, they say any press is good press. Maybe I should've stayed home. But then I never would've met Tommy Smith, the craziest, most outrageous, silly, sexy man I've ever known--a man who makes me wonder if it may be worth holding out for Mr. Forever. A man who might turn my rotten luck around. But only if we survive the weekend and I clear my name....
All American Girl
by Meg Cabot<P>Top Ten Reasons Samantha Madison is in Deep Trouble -- <br>10. Her big sister is the most popular girl in school. <br>9. Her little sister is a certified genius. <br>8. She's in love with her big sister's boyfriend. <br>7. She got caught selling celebrity portraits in school. <br>6. And now she's being forced to take art classes. <br>5. She's just saved the president of the United States from an assassination attempt. <br> 4. So the whole world thinks she is a hero. <br> 3. Even though Sam knows she is far, far from being a hero. <br>2. And now she's been appointed teen ambassador to the UN. <P>And the number-one reason Sam's life is over? <br>1. The president's son just might be in love with her.
All Black Cats are Not Alike
by Peter Arkle Goldwasser AmyEvery cat owner knows that no two cats are alike. This pitch-perfect illustrated book proves this simple fact by diving whiskers first into the unique personality, charisma, and character of 50 real all-black cats. From Alfie, who "has no tolerance for wet humans or being ignored," to Sashi, who "enjoys freeze-dried chicken by candlelight and full-on body rubs," each cat comes to life through a lovingly hand-drawn portrait and quick-witted profile. Delightfully quirky and utterly charming, this motley crew of black cats will win over anyone with a dry sense of humor.
All By My Selves
by Jeff Dunham"The most popular standup comic in the U. S. " --Time Whether he's breathing life into Walter, an old curmudgeon; Peanut, an over-caffeinated purple maniac; or Achmed, a screaming, skeletal, dead terrorist, comedian and ventriloquist Jeff Dunham is the straight man to some of the wildest, funniest partners in show business. All By My Selves is the story of one pretty ordinary guy, one interesting hobby, one very understanding set of parents, and a long and winding road to becoming America's favorite comedian. With wit, honesty, and lots of great show business detail, Dunham shares all the major moments in his journey to worldwide fame and success. .
All Cats Are Introverts
by Francesco MarciulianoFrom the author of the #1 New York Times bestseller I Could Pee on This: Poems by cats who just need a little “me time.”Have you ever been labeled as “antisocial” because you’d rather stay home on the couch, “shy” because you don’t like big parties, or “lost in your own thoughts” because you don’t realize someone’s been calling your name 148 times? The cats understand. All Cats Are Introverts is a collection of self-reflective poetry from cats that clearly shows them to be the insightful, often alert, crowd-averse, personally engaging, probably napping-as-we-speak introverts of the animal kingdom. Enjoy this completely relatable and hilarious book, and perhaps you will soon see the cat—and even yourself—in a whole new light.
All Dressed Up
by Lucy HepburnA hunt for her sister’s wedding dress leads a woman from Paris to Venice—and into an unexpected romance—in this delightfully entertaining tale . . . Molly Wright is in Paris, in a romantic restaurant, with the moonlight dancing over La Seine, sitting next to her long-term boyfriend Reggie . . . and desperately hoping he doesn’t propose. She’s not sure they want the same things anymore—he wants the big time, all she wants to do is design clothes. Molly gets her wish: Reggie doesn’t propose. Instead, he breaks up with her . . . Despite her doubts, Molly is brokenhearted. Then she’s interrupted by a frantic message from her sister who needs a teeny tiny favor: She’s getting married in Venice in two days, and she wants Molly to pick up the all-important dress from the Parisian designer. But the dress seems determined to get away from her, and transportation keeps letting her down. When filmmaker Simon Foss decides to tag along for the ride, Molly thinks he’s just one more distraction she doesn’t need. Especially when she finds herself falling for him . . .
All Dressed Up and Nowhere to Go: Cuts, All Dressed Up And Nowhere To Go, And Doctor Criminale
by Malcolm BradburyMalcolm Bradbury's humorous look at Britain's transition to midcentury modernity After spending a year teaching in an American university in the 1950s, Malcolm Bradbury returned to England only to realize that his native country had become nearly as mystifying to him as the American Midwest. As Britain marched toward a new decade, much of the country was changing inexorably, its agrarian past paved over by suburban developers, its quiet traditionalism replaced by beehive hairdos and shiny, glass-walled office buildings. And so, to confront this curious moment in British history, Bradbury turned to the sharpest tool in his arsenal: humor. In All Dressed Up and Nowhere to Go, he writes of a country balancing precariously on the boundary of two worlds, with the wry wit and keenly observant eye that have made him one of the twentieth century's greatest satirists.
All Ears (FunJungle)
by Stuart GibbsIn the ninth novel in New York Times bestselling author Stuart Gibbs&’s FunJungle series, resident sleuth Teddy Fitzroy is on the case to find a missing elephant and clear his friend of vandalism.When a herd of elephants interrupts the big Friday night football game, the police enlist Teddy and his father to assist them in getting the animals safely back home to the elephant sanctuary. Only when they arrive, their owners realize one of the elephants has gone missing! The lone African elephant, Tanzy, is still out there somewhere. Then Teddy&’s best friend, Xavier, is accused of vandalizing a bulldozer in protest of a builder ruining a beloved piece of land they call TurtleTown. Teddy is torn. His best friend needs him but so does Tanzy. Can Teddy crack both cases before someone gets hurt?
All Eyes on Thumbs (Fountas & Pinnell Classroom, Guided Reading)
by Bill Basso Michael SullivanNIMAC-sourced textbook. Will He Dare? Thumbs has written an insulting song for the talent show. Will he really sing it in front of the whole school?
All Fired Up
by Dylan NewtonAfter one wild night together, two complete opposites plan to stay firmly in the friend zone, but life has other plans in this delightful romantic comedy, perfect for fans of Emily Henry and Abby Jimenez. As a successful book publicist, Imani Lewis works night and day to promote her authors. It&’s her dream job, but she&’s become a total workaholic. So when her grandmother invites her to stay for the summer as she recovers from surgery, Imani happily agrees. But being back in the same small town as her one-night stand may not be quite the relaxing break she envisioned… Zander Matthews wakes up every day determined to enjoy the present because he knows from his time in the Marines that tomorrow isn&’t guaranteed. But he&’s never gotten over the beautiful woman who blew through town a year ago, then disappeared. And he doesn&’t want to be hurt again. So they agree to a deal: he&’ll help Imani fix up her grandmother&’s house as long as they stay firmly in the friend zone. Whether it&’s repairing tiles in his ceramics studio, dodging nosy neighbors, or soothing the most obnoxious parrot ever, Zander never fails to make Imani laugh. And soon their friendly banter is turning ever flirtier. But since Imani&’s stay is temporary and Zander can&’t be tied to anything beyond the most tenuous plans, will she be able to handle it when things get all fired up?"All Fired Up is a delightful second chance, opposites attract, small-town romantic comedy [that] would be perfect for fans of the Bergman Brothers series by Chloe Liese, the Brown Sisters trilogy by Talia Hibbert, the Hot and Hammered trilogy by Tessa Bailey, and the Written in the Stars trilogy by Alexandria Bellefleur." --The Nerd Daily
All Fired Up
by M. K. England&“A red-hot sapphic romance that&’s perfect for Ali Hazelwood fans.&”—Timothy Janovsky, USA Today bestselling author of The (Fake) Dating GameA fire-starting scientist and a bi firefighter team up to save their best friend from an epic mistake in this celebration of queer joy, perfect for fans of Casey McQuiston and Ashley Herring Blake.Nicole Wells left Seattle two years ago for a master&’s in fire dynamics and some much-needed space. Now she&’s back, ready to hit reset on her life…and take one last chance on best friend/unrequited love Skylar Clark. But Nic&’s plans crumble when Skylar announces she&’s quitting her job and moving to Fiji for secret reasons—another typical Skylar disaster in the making. It&’s a giant red flag, and Nic feels like she&’s the only one who sees it… Until she meets Kira.Kira McKinney stepped in as Skylar&’s safety net friend while Nic was away. She&’s got plenty of her own problems—can&’t get promoted, cancels all her dates, her fire chief father&’s legacy—but when Skylar makes her announcement, Kira knows she&’s needed again. Fortunately, Kira finds an ally in Nic, and when talking to Skylar doesn&’t work, there&’s only one option left: shenanigans. But as all their efforts go up in smoke, one thing becomes wildly clear. The situation between Nic and Kira is heating up…but they&’ll have to let go of the past first if they don&’t want to get burned.&“Hilarious and heartfelt. I couldn&’t turn the pages fast enough!&”—Carlyn Greenwald, author of Director&’s Cut
All Fired Up (Pokémon Chapter Books)
by Jennifer Johnson Jennifer L. JohnsonCatch this action-packed adventure about Ash, Pikachu, and their friends! This chapter book features classic characters featured on Netflix and in Pokémon Go.Ash wants to be a great Pokémon Trainer. But sometimes Trainers have to make big sacrifices. Charizard can only get stronger if it leaves Ash -- forever. But that means Ash has no Fire-type Pokémon at all. Have his dreams of becoming a Pokémon Master gone up in flames? This chapter book is based on a thrilling storyline from the top-rated animated series now on Netflix. Black-and-white illustrations throughout.
All Fired Up: Tales of a Country Fireman
by Malcolm CastleA unique and gloriously nostalgic account of one eventful year in the fire service for readers who loved books such as CALL THE MIDWIFE and TRUST ME, I'M A VET.Nothing about the county fire service was quite what Malcolm expected when he joined the watch in Shrewsbury. As the newest member of the service he was first in line when swans terrorised the high street - and when a flock of owls got stuck on the roof of his local pub. Eighteen years old and more than ready to rush into burning buildings to save fair damsels in distress, young Malcolm soon realised he was more likely to be jumping into slurry pits and rivers to rescue any number of unfortunate animals. But for all the embarrassing situations Malcolm found himself in there were heart-stopping dramas too - and tragic farm and house fires. As he learns on the job and begins to win the respect of the old-timers, Malcolm starts to feel that maybe, one day, he just might make it as a fireman. But first he has to catch the eye of the smiley secretary in the office opposite the station ... Funny, moving and gloriously nostalgic, All Fired Up paints a unique portrait of rural Britain - and shows just how surprising a fireman's life can be.