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Scary School #3: The Northern Frights
by Derek The GhostCharles Nukid and his friends--including new student Lattie, a tough ninja girl--take on their biggest challenge yet in this frighteningly funny addition to the Scary School series. When theyre chosen to attend Scream Academy as exchange students, theyll have to face: Rolf Meltington--the principal of Scream Academy and the abominable snowmanPolter-bears--part poltergeist, part polar bear . . . totally frighteningThe Headless Horseman--dont lose your head in his classBut theres something even scarier than going to school with yetis, ogres, and trolls: the Ice Dragon. As an ancient prophecy comes to pass, Charles finds himself destined to battle the monstrous Ice Dragon in order to save both Scream Academy and Scary School from destruction.
Scary Shark: A Jaw-some Halloween
by Mike LoweryEdgar and Lotta return with a scarily funny Halloween follow-up to Santa Shark and Pizza Shark, from New York Times bestselling creator Mike Lowery!It's Halloween night, and Edgar the Shark is frightened of all the scary creatures floating just outside his window. Luckily, his best friend Lotta is there to show him Halloween is just a day to pretend to be scary. Together they carve jack o'lanternfish, hang magni-fish-ent decorations, and choose the pretend-scariest costumes they can think of! But will that be enough to help Edgar prove he's not a scaredy-catfish?With laugh-out-loud humor and trick-or-treat themed fun, this is a can't-miss story perfect for readers looking for treats, not tricks, this Halloween! So get ready for a much-needed underwater adventure from New York Times bestselling and beloved creator, Mike Lowery!
Scat
by Carl HiaasenFrom Newbery Honoree Carl Hiaasen comes this New York Times bestseller in which an eccentric eco-avenger, a stuffed rat named Chelsea, a wannabe Texas oilman, and an angry panther can't stop two kids on a mission to find their missing teacher!When Mrs Starch, the most feared biology teacher in Florida, goes missing during a school trip to the Black Vine Swamp, her class is secretly relieved.The school principal tries to cover it up as a 'family emergency', but Nick and Marta just aren't convinced. They think it's much more likely to have something to do with Smoke, the local troublemaker - whose run-ins with Mrs Starch are infamous - and decide to do some investigating of their own.But there's more going on in Black Vine Swamp than either one of them could guess. And Nick and Marta must see off an eccentric eco-avenger, a stuffed rat named Chelsea, a crooked oil prospector, a singing substitute teacher, and an angry Florida panther before they really begin to see the big picture.
Scat
by Carl HiaasenCarl Hiaasen takes us deep in the Everglades with an eccentric eco-avenger, a ticked-off panther, and two kids on a mission to find their missing teacher. Florida—where the animals are wild and the people are wilder! Bunny Starch, the most feared biology teacher ever, is missing. She disappeared after a school field trip to Black Vine Swamp. And, to be honest, the kids in her class are relieved. But when the principal tries to tell the students that Mrs. Starch has been called away on a "family emergency," Nick and Marta just don't buy it. No, they figure the class delinquent, Smoke, has something to do with her disappearance. And he does! But not in the way they think. There's a lot more going on in Black Vine Swamp than any one player in this twisted tale can see. It&’s all about to hit the fan, and when it does, the bad guys better scat. &“Ingenious . . . Scat won&’t disappoint Hiaasenphiles of any age.&” —The New York Times &“Woohoo! It&’s time for another trip to Florida—screwy, gorgeous Florida, with its swamps and scammers and strange creatures (two- and four-legged). Our guide, of course, is Carl Hiaasen.&” —DenverPost.com
Scatalog
by Balloon Knot Productions Gary HallgrenTasteful middlebrow reproductions from the National Museum o' Fart Allegedly handcrafted items of a whimsical, organic, suburban-bohemian, high-colonic, holistic nature from New Age catalog Effluvia Tasteless novelties and highly impractical practical jokes from the Ushita catalog Upmarket gadgets and nifty, battery-operated devices from The Crapper Image
Scene of the Crime: A Thrilling FBI Romance
by Carla CassidyTwo FBI agents-and former lovers-team up to bring down a serial killer in New York Times bestselling author Carla Cassidy's latest crime scene book Seven people have disappeared and it's up to FBI agent Alexander Harkins and his team to bring them all home safely. But when he discovers his ex-wife, Georgina Beaumont, is part of that team, he's forced to make peace with his past in order to stay focused on the mission. Georgina is a stark reminder of the life he once had, and working together will mean trying to forget the woman he still loves. Then the killer shifts focus onto Georgina-forcing them to seek solace in one another-and Alexander is reminded just how much he stands to lose.
Scene of the Crime: Bridgewater, Texas
by Carla CassidyWhen Sheriff Matt Buchanan discovers FBI profiler Jenna Taylor snooping around his crime scene, he isn't pleased. The last thing he needs is the FBI meddling. But Jenna is determined to find her best friend's murderer, and she won't be bullied out of town. Then the madman strikes again. His calling card? A red rose.Realizing they're dealing with a serial killer, Matt accepts Jenna's help. But when Jenna becomes the madman's target, the danger—and their unrelenting attraction—is imminent. Will Jenna find safety in Matt's arms—or will the next rose she receives be her last?
Scene of the Crime: Widow Creek
by Carla CassidyLexie Forbes had come to Kansas looking for answers, but all she uncovered was a killer on her trail. Still, the FBI agent wasn't about to give up on her desperate search for the truth behind the suspicious death that sent her reeling...even if no one in the small, eerie town was talking. No one except sexy rancher Nick Walker.Nick had experienced his own share of tragedy and all he wanted was to be left alone. But refusing the gorgeous and persistent Lexie was tougher than roping cattle-especially once he realized they shared a very dangerous connection. Before long, Nick went from trying his best to ignore the sizzling tension between them to doing whatever he could to ensure Lexie didn't become the town's latest victim.
Scenes from the Epic Life of a Total Genius
by Stacey MatsonLights! Camera! Action! Arthur Bean is ready to have the best year any eighth grader has ever had. The awesome zombie movie he's writing with BFF Robbie Zack is definitely going to be a blockbuster. He even has a girlfriend. Yes, that's right, a GIRLFRIEND! With everything lined up so nicely, he's sure his teachers will start to appreciate his true genius this year. Except for the little problem of the movie camera Arthur and Robbie "borrowed" to film their upcoming blockbuster movie. And then Arthur's girlfriend gets jealous of his friendship with Kennedy. And there's the actual co-writing, producing, and directing of their film...Drama is definitely on the menu for this year. Arthur would just prefer it stay confined to his script.
Scenes of a Graphic Nature: 'A perfect page-turner' (Dolly Alderton) from the bestselling author of The Rachel Incident
by Caroline O'DonoghueTHE RACHEL INCIDENT - Caroline O'Donoghue's bestselling new novel* - is out nowCharlie's life isn't going forward - so she's decided to go back After a tough few years floundering around the British film industry and experimenting with amateur pornography, Charlie and her best friend Laura take a trip to her familial home on an island off the west coast of Ireland. Her father's health is rapidly declining and this could be the last chance to connect with her roots. But events on the island cause Charlie to doubt her father's childhood stories - and then there's her complicated relationship with Laura. Pursuing the truth will shatter everything she thought knew - but is that what it takes to grow up?'A gorgeous exploration of the messy and fragile nature of friendship and all the many forms of love' IRISH TIMES'A darkly humorous, keenly observed blend of millennial drift and murder mystery from a razor-sharp writer' RED'Witty, tender and insightful' GUARDIAN'A perfect page-turner. I loved it' DOLLY ALDERTON'Wonderful. Had me gripped' MARIAN KEYES*The Rachel Incident was a #2 bestseller in Ireland in June 2023
SchadenFreezers!: 56 Cruel Jokes in 12 Fun Flavors
by Matt Moore Jason KreherSadism on a stick!Get ready for the bitter taste of SchadenFreezers! This dark twist on your favorite frozen treat has some serious bite. From racist grandmas to underappreciated janitors, no one is safe in this compilation of colorfully depraved jokes!What kind of sandwich does a ballerina eat? (Yeah right.)Why did the circus close? (A long, chilling list of animal rights violations.)How many lives does a cat have? (Only one.)
Schadenfreude, A Love Story
by Rebecca Schuman“A wild and wonderful ride” from a comic memoirist “who writes brilliantly about Germany and Germans . . . and being young and insane. . . . just read it, ok?” (Dave Barry, Pulitzer Prize–winning, New York Times–bestselling author of Best. State. Ever).You know that feeling you get watching the elevator doors slam shut just before your toxic coworker can step in? There’s a word for this mix of malice and joy, and the Germans invented it. It’s Schadenfreude, deriving pleasure from others’ misfortune. Misfortune happens to be a specialty of Rebecca Schuman—and this is great news for the Germans. For Rebecca adores the Vaterland with a single-minded passion.Let’s just say the affection isn’t mutual.Schadenfreude is the story of a teenage Jewish intellectual who falls in love—with a boy (who breaks her heart), a language (that’s nearly impossible to master), a culture (that’s nihilistic, but punctual), and a landscape (that’s breathtaking when there’s not a wall in the way). Rebecca is a misunderstood 90’s teenager with a passion for Pearl Jam and Ethan Hawke circa Reality Bites, until two men walk into her high school Civics class: Dylan Gellner, with deep brown eyes and an even deeper soul, and Franz Kafka, hitching a ride in Dylan’s backpack. These two men are the axe to the frozen sea that is Rebecca’s spirit, and what flows forth is a passion for all things German.At once a snapshot of a young woman finding herself, and a country starting to stitch itself back together after nearly a century of war, Schadenfreude, A Love Story is a hilarious and heartfelt memoir proving that sometimes the truest loves play hard to get.“Spit-out-your-schnitzel funny.” —Pamela Druckerman, New York Times–bestselling author of Bringing Up Bébé
Schadenfreude: A Handy Guide to the Glee Found in Others' Misery
by Lawrence DorfmanScha den freu de: noun, often capitalized \'shä-d?n-?fro?i-d?\ Schadenfreude i/'???d?nfr??d?/ (German: ['?a?d?n?f???d?]): pleasure derived from the misfortunes of others."Revenge is a dish best served cold."We've all heard the phrase. It was made most famous in the Godfather movies. And some do credit this saying to the Mafia, dating back to the old country of Sicily. Others say it had its origins in Spain. Still others claim it for the Pashtuns, as a precursor to the Afghan way of life. And there are many who say its direct history stems from Kahless the Unforgettable, banished leader of the Klingons.Typically, the Germans beat the rest of the world hands down when it comes to conjuring a specific word that sums it up. And that word is Schadenfreude.Those of us that are human (most of the book-buying public), whether we will admit it or not, have at some point or another gained malicious delight from the misfortune of others. Most often tied to a vaguely biblical outlook, it is a perfect summing up of a perfectly human trait. Nobody wants to admit it, but we all do it . . . and, often times, gleefully.
Schmegoogle
by Daniel KleinSchmegoogle: n. : a person so insignificant that if you Google his name, nothing comes up.Schmegoogle: Yiddish Words for Modern Times is a hilariously useful lexicon of neologisms that capture the flavor of life as we live it today.This clever book introduces more than 200 new terms rooted in real Yiddish, accompanied funny use-it-in-a-sentence examples and entertaining etymology.• Yiddish has long enriched English language slang.• Covers subjects including technology, family, dating, anxiety, insults and more• All terms are a unique blend of classic Yiddish with modern topicsIn this fast-changing modern world experienced online and through apps, of foodies, legal weed, and shifting social constructs, our need for the expressive wonders of Yiddish has never been greater. Bothered by that unanswered drift of e-mail piling up (e-charazi), stuffed by food or worry (gifilted), feeling like the dating app sends in only clowns (a zhlub magnet)? Schmegoogle is here to help.• Hilarious useful Yiddish neologisms for the 21st century• Makes a great gift for Jewish holidays or anyone who loves Jewish humor, as well as language nerds.• Perfect to for any occasion• You'll love this book if you love books like Yiddish with Dick and Jane by Ellis Weiner and Barbara Davilman, Born to Kvetch: Yiddish Language and Culture in All of Its Moods by Michael Wex, and Yiddish with George and Laura by Ellis Weiner, Barbara Davilman.
Schokoladenschmelze
by Ian BillingsAls Maciii und sein neuer Freund J.B. versehentlich Agenten des MI3 (und ein bisschen) werden, sind sie kurze Zeit später dem gemeinsten Schuljungen der Welt, Oleg Blubberblase, und seinem Handlanger, Rotznase, auf der Spur. "SCHOKOLADE ZUM RUNTERLADEN" ist Blubberblases gemeiner Plan, jedem unwissenden Leckermäulchen auf der Welt die Taschen zu leeren. Aber wird sein Plan gelingen?
School Board
by Mike Freedman"School Board is a total joy to read, as full of sass and subversive brass as its 18-year-old hero, the political neophyte and Houston school board candidate Tucker 'Catfish' Davis ... I hope School Board is the first of many more to come from this gifted young writer."-Ben Fountain, author of National Book Critics Circle Award winner Billy Lynn's Long Halftime Walk and Brief Encounters with Che Guevara"Into the riotous cavalcade of great American literary characters tumbles a new class clown, Tucker 'Catfish' Davis, high school senior and aspiring politician. One part Ignatius J. Reilly from A Confederacy of Dunces, one part Hazel Motes from Wise Blood, and several parts Willie Stark from All the King's Men, Catfish Davis is a singular presence on the page. Mike Freedman hasn't just written the funniest book about a school board election, he's written the kind of David-and-Goliath story that gets all of us 'little people' cheering and laughing in equal measure."-David Abrams, author of Fobbit Houston, Texas, 1999. Enter Tucker "Catfish" Davis, a high school senior with high-flying political ambitions as the self-proclaimed heir to populist Louisiana Governors Huey and Earl Long. Armed with idealism and a fedora, he embarks on a quixotic campaign to get elected to the local school board in an effort to help the "little people" of Houston.In the wild days that follow, Catfish's long-shot bid gains traction through guerilla campaigning against a questionable tax deal supported by his opponent, a powerful executive at an Enron-esque energy company. With the help of his classmates, an indicted Louisiana governor, a gay journalist with nascent mayoral ambitions and an ex-Green Beret trained to wage unconventional warfare, Catfish makes it a race Houston will never forget.Based on an actual 1999 news story, School Board is an entertaining but satirical debut novel that revels in the diversity, madness and absurdities of the Bayou City.
School Days According to Humphrey (According to Humphrey #7)
by Betty G. BirneyHumphrey is excited to get back to Room 26 and see all his old classmates. <P><P>But on the first day of school, a bunch of strange kids arrive and no matter how loudly he squeaks up, they don't realize they're in the wrong room! <P><P>Once Humphrey gets over the shock of being with a whole new group of students, he gets busy learning all about them and their problems. <P><P>There's Rolling-Rosie, who can pop wheelies with her wheelchair, Tall-Paul and Small- Paul, who don't like to hear about their height, Hurry-Up-Harry, who loses track of time, and more. <P>He hasn't forgotten about his friends from last year, and of course they miss him a ton. <P> But when they start talking about taking him from Mrs. Brisbane's room, Humphrey gets unsqueakably nervous. How could he say good-bye to Mrs. Brisbane and Og for good?
School Fever
by Brod BagertA kid's-eye view of school, crammed with enough funny to fill a big yellow bus!Snappy and hilarious in true Brod Bagert style, these goofy poems are united by their kid authenticity and quirky school themes. From a computer virus that one kid claims is sure to keep him homesick until summer vacation, to the librarian who tames "the savage beast" (a mouse run amok in the library), to a superhero recruited to scare off the school bully, this is most definitely not your typical poetry collection. Robert Neubecker's bright, dynamic artwork propels each poem into another stratosphere of funny. By the end, kids will have contracted a different strain of school fever altogether."Kids will appreciate the humor and will see themselves in the high-energy narrator"—Booklist
School Spirit! (My Little Pony)
by Louise AlexanderAnother school day ends, and the Cutie Mark Crusaders are disappointed that they still don't have their cutie marks. What are their special talents? Then, Apple Bloom has an idea! Maybe writing is their talent. The Crusaders join the staff of the school newspaper, The Foal Free Press. But their editor, Diamond Tiara, only wants "juicy" stories, so the Crusaders have to work hard under the pen name Gabby Gums to deliver Ponyville gossip. Will they go too far and end up covered in ink?© 2015 Hasbro. All Rights Reserved.
School Yard Jokes
by Hinkler BooksSplit your sides laughing and entertain your family and friends for hours with this hilarious book of school yard jokes! Full of comical illustrations by Glen Singleton, School Yard Jokes will keep you laughing for hours.
School Year Jitters (The Jitters Series)
by Julie DannebergIn this epistolary follow-up to the best-selling First Day Jitters and Last Day Blues, Mrs. Hartwell receives letters over the course of one school year from just about everyone.As every first-year teacher knows, a classroom full of second graders can be alarmingly unpredictable.The letters the children write to Mrs. Hartwell are sympathetic ("I figured you might be a little scared, just like me"); informative ("…most kids don't eat cauliflower"); encouraging ("Yesterday was THE BEST!"); and apologetic ("I'm sorry about throwing up all over your shoes"). Even a local firefighter writes to Sarah Jane.Fun, funny, and heart-warming, Danneberg&’s The Jitters series is sure to delight both teachers and children as they follow Mrs. Hartwell and her class through the year. With School Year Jitters, classes will be inspired to write letters to their own teachers about their favorite, or wildest, days of the year.
School of Fear (School of Fear #1)
by Gitty DaneshvariEveryone is afraid of something... Madeleine Masterson is deathly afraid of bugs, especially spiders. Theodore Bartholomew is petrified of dying. Lulu Punchalower is scared of confined spaces. Garrison Feldman is terrified of deep water. With very few options left, the parents of these four twelve year-olds send them to the highly elusive and exclusive School of Fear to help them overcome their phobias. But when their peculiar teacher, Mrs. Wellington, and her unconventional teaching methods turn out to be more frightening than even their fears, the foursome realize that this just may be the scariest summer of their lives.
School of Fear 3: The Final Exam (School of Fear #3)
by Gitty DaneshvariCheck out the laugh-inducing, phobia-reducing final book in the School of Fear trilogy! Is school out forever at the School of Fear? A nosy reporter is planning a scandalous expose on eccentric Mrs. Wellington and her unorthodox teaching methods, and the news is sure to put an end to the school. Madeleine, Theo, Lulu, Garrison, and the new student Hyacinth must convince Sylvie that their teacher and the school are perfectly normal. But how can they accomplish this when Mrs. Wellington is just so... odd? With the fate of their beloved school in their hands, the children now share a new fear--failure.
School of Fear: Book 1 (School of Fear)
by Gitty DaneshvariMadeleine Masterson is deathly afraid of bugs, especially spiders.Theodore Bartholomew is petrified of dying.Lulu Punchalower is scared of confined spaces.Garrison Feldman is terrified of deep water.Which is why this may be the scariest summer of their lives. Worse than detention or summer school. Worse even than the dentist. The foursome must face their phobias head-on at the exclusive and elusive School of Fear. The school is unusual, to say the least. But 'terrifying' would be a more accurate description. The curriculum is simple: Conquer your fears in six weeks or find out just how frightening failing can be.
School of Fear: Class Is Not Dismissed! (School of Fear #2)
by Gitty DaneshvariIn this hilarious follow-up to School of Fear, eccentric headmaster Mrs. Wellington demands requests the presence of Madeleine, Theo, Lulu, and Garrison for a mandatory summer of retraining after discovering that each of her former students has secretly regressed. Facing their fears was terrifying enough, but when the foursome learns they'll be joined by a fifth student, things start to get even scarier.To make matters worse, the students quickly find themselves tasked with saving their school. And because failing means spending the rest of their lives with unresolved phobias, this is one test they all plan to ace.