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School of Fortune
by Janice Weber Amanda BrownA fun, fresh frolic of a novel starring a spoiled but lovable Texas heiress out to reclaim her fortunePippa Walker's wedding was to be huge—Texas huge—complete with twelve bridesmaids under contract from Pippa's mother to stay lean and long-haired, gondolas flown in from Venice, A- and B- guest lists. But when Pippa finds out her handsome husband-to-be isn't what she thought, she bolts from her own wedding, shocking society and getting herself disinherited. The only way she can get a piece of the family fortune back is to earn a degree from a school. Any school. It's a tough assignment for a girl who dropped out of SMU after pledging Kappa Kappa Gamma and shopping at Neiman's for a year.But Pippa is nothing if not up for a challenge. Attracting one hilarious misadventure after another, she tries to earn her sheepskin at: driving school, matchmaking school, even a circus academy. It's only when she hits rock-bottom—The Mountbatten Savoy School of Household Management—that things begin to look up. But can she really be falling in love with a…valet?"Great, silly fun, guaranteed to be seen at a beach near you." - Kirkus Reviews
School of Meanies
by Daren King'Ghost School is stupid and rubbish, and, um, I'm not going to Ghost School ever again!' Bumping is Humphrey Bump's best thing - even better than cakes and lollipops! But the nasty headmaster at ghost school doesn't agree. He expels Humphrey for - you've got it! - bumping. So the other ghosties - Agatha, Tabitha and Wither -find Humphrey a place at still-alive school. They are also on hand to help him make friends. Wither invisibly writes a spooky poem on the board, Agatha sends children whirling into the clouds, and they all whisp out of Humphrey's satchel during lessons. The still-alive children are so mean they only run away. But they are nothing compared to the still-alive headmaster who is the biggest bully ever. Can Humphrey gather all the ghosties together to fight the bully, save the school and make lots of new friends?
School of Meanies (Frightfully Friendly Ghosties #3)
by Daren King'Ghost School is stupid and rubbish, and, um, I'm not going to Ghost School ever again!' Bumping is Humphrey Bump's best thing - even better than cakes and lollipops! But the nasty headmaster at ghost school doesn't agree. He expels Humphrey for - you've got it! - bumping. So the other ghosties - Agatha, Tabitha and Wither -find Humphrey a place at still-alive school. They are also on hand to help him make friends. Wither invisibly writes a spooky poem on the board, Agatha sends children whirling into the clouds, and they all whisp out of Humphrey's satchel during lessons. The still-alive children are so mean they only run away. But they are nothing compared to the still-alive headmaster who is the biggest bully ever. Can Humphrey gather all the ghosties together to fight the bully, save the school and make lots of new friends?
School of Roars: Monster Book Day
by School of RoarsIt's time to go to the School of Roars! Join the monsters for a roarsome day.It's Monster Book Day and the monsters are having fun dressing up as their favourite book characters. But Icklewoo doesn't like her silly, frilly Cinderella dress. Can Wufflebump help her transform her outfit into something suitably monstrous? Brilliantly exploring first experiences and featuring themes of kindness, friendship and problem-solving, this School of Roars story is perfect for little monsters everywhere!Also available: School of Roars: Show and Tell, School of Roars: Bestest Friends and School of Roars: Icky Sticky Stickers
School's Out!
by Jack SheffieldAs the new school year begins, Jack Sheffield prepares for an even more eventful year than usual. A new teacher is appointed, and before long tongues start to wag.Meanwhile, five-year old Madona Fazackerly makes her mark in an unexpected way, life changes dramatically for Ruby the caretaker and, in the village Coffee Shop, Dorothy Humpleby plans a dirty weekend.It’s 1983 - the era of the new CD player, Microsoft Word, the McDonalds McNugget, cabbage patch dolls, the threat of a miners’ strike and a final farewell to the halfpenny piece.Jack has to manage a year of triumph and tragedy…
School's Out...Forever! (Dragon Slayers' Academy #20)
by Kate Mcmullan Bill Basso Stephen GilpinIt's Graduation Day at DSA! Fans have been requesting another DSA book for years. And here it is! While money-hungry headmaster Mordred is busy planning DSA's conversion into a deluxe casino, Wiglaf and his friends are on a mission to find their dragon buddy Worm. Unsuccessful in their quest, the group returns to see the school set up for a surprise graduation. Will Worm reunite with his friends before the doors close? And what comes next for the young knights in training? Find out in the much anticipated finale to McMullan's hilarious fantasy series.
School-Tripped (Babymouse Tales from the Locker #3)
by Jennifer L. HolmWatch out, Big City! Babymouse is on a field trip without a chaperone in the third book in the Babymousetastic, highly illustrated Babymouse: Tales from the Locker series.Babymouse's art class is headed to a museum in the Big City. And now that they're middle schoolers, she and her friends will be totally unsupervised! She can't wait to check out all the world-famous art...that is, until she overhears Felicia Furrypaws planning to ditch the museum and hit the town instead. Babymouse decides to test her freedom with an urban adventure of her own. Will she make it back to the museum before the bus leaves? Or will life in the Big City trip her up big-time?
School. Hasn't This Gone on Long Enough? (Dear Dumb Diary Year Two #1)
by Jim BentonBestselling author Jim Benton is back, with a brand-new spin on a favorite series!Bestselling author Jim Benton is back, with a brand-new spin on a favorite series!Dear Dumb Diary is a hilarious hit! Now after 12 books (each covering a month of her life), Jamie Kelly's upcoming diaries have a fresh look and a fun twist. It's Dear Dumb Diary: Year Two! The diary entries are still laugh-out-loud funny -- but this is a whole new beginning. Everything is another year dumber!As Jamie grapples with school, grades, and middle school's Big Questions, don't miss even more of her words of wisdom like, "If someone is really, really intelligent, it would be polite if they would ugly it up a bit before they left the house."(Jamie STILL has no idea that anybody is reading her diary. So please, please, please don't tell her.)
Schooled (Penworthy Picks Middle School Ser.)
by Gordon KormanIn this bestselling fish-out-of-water classic, a homeschooled kid must learn how to fit in at his new public school when he's elected to be class president as a prank. Capricorn Anderson (Cap for short) has never watched a television show. He&’s never tasted pizza. He&’s never heard of a wedgie. And he has never, even in his wildest dreams, thought he&’d live anywhere but the Garland Farm commune with his hippie grandmother and homeschool instructor, Rain. But all this changes when Rain is stuck in the hospital and Cap is sent to Claverage Middle School (dubbed C Average by the kids). Cap doesn't exactly fit in at school, with his long, ungroomed hair and hemp clothes; in fact, he's the biggest nerd around. But when he&’s elected eighth grade president as a joke, Cap is more puzzled than ever, and soon the joke grows into something more. Will Cap be the greatest president in the history of C Average or the biggest punch line? Rife with Gordon Korman&’s signature humor, Schooled is a heartwarming story about friendship, kindness, and finding your place—which may not always be where you think it is.
Schoolhouse of Secrets (Ponyville Mysteries #1)
by Penumbra QuillAt the Ponyville Schoolhouse, there's a new student! She's a young Unicorn named Lilymoon, and she's...well...different. She never smiles, her cutie mark is a spooky moon on top of a spell book, and she clearly seems to have no interest in making friends with anypony! One day, strange things start happening around the Schoolhouse, and Lilymoon is the prime pony suspect! Can the Cutie Mark Crusaders find out what Lilymoon wants before it's too late? ©2017 Hasbro. All Rights Reserved.
Schooling Around #1: Treasure Fever!
by Andy GriffithsThe literary genius behind the NY Times best-selling THE DAY MY BUTT WENT PSYCHO is back--with an original school-based series created just for Scholastic! Meet Henry McThrottle, a fifth-grader at Northwest Southeast Central School. Henry has an extremely active imagination--sometimes it's hard to tell where his imagination stops and the real world begins. His flights of fancy lead to adventures of the sort only Andy Griffiths could dream up: always hilarious, never predictable, sure to keep kids laughing and reading!
Schooling Around #2: Pencil of Doom!
by Andy GriffithsFrom the bestselling author of THE DAY MY BUTT WENT PSYCHO, a hilarious school-based series -- this time focusing on a very magical, insidious pencil. Henry McThrottle thought Northwest Southeast Central School was wacky. But then he comes across the Pencil of Doom ... and things get REALLY out of control. Another hilarious school story from NYT bestselling author Andy Griffiths!
Schooling Around #3: Mascot Madness!
by Andy GriffithsThe third wacky book in Andy Griffiths's hilarous new school series Henry McThrottle thought Northwest Southeast Central School was wacky. But then mascot madness takes over during the annual Sports Carnival competition against Northwest West Academy...and things get REALLY out of control. A third hilarious school story from NYT bestselling author Andy Griffiths!
Schooling Around #4: Robot Riot!
by Andy GriffithsThe fourth wacky book in Andy Griffith's new Schooling Around! series. Robots are running amok in Northwest Southeast Central school! It all started as a harmless science experiment meant to prove whether or not the new girl in school was in fact a robot. But now a robot of a different kind is chewing up the hallways and causing panic not seen in this area since Schooling Around #3! What are the students at Northwest Southeast Central going to do? RUN! And what are readers going to do? LAUGH!
Schooling the Viscount (Cotswold Confidential #1)
by Maggie Robinson“Schooling the Viscount is a charming, sexy romp through the English countryside. Readers will fall in love with the little town of Puddling-on-the-Wold. I did!” —Vanessa Kelly, USA Today bestselling authorWelcome to Puddling‑on‑the‑Wold, where the sons and daughters of Victorian nobility come for a little rest, recuperation, and “rehab,” in this brand-new series of rebellious romance from Maggie Robinson.After a harrowing tour of duty abroad, Captain Lord Henry Challoner fought to keep his memories at bay with two of his preferred vices: liquor and ladies. But the gin did more harm than good—as did Henry’s romantic entanglements, since he was supposed to be finding a suitable bride. Next stop: The tiny village of Gloucestershire, where Henry can finally sober up without distraction or temptation. Or so he thinks…A simple country schoolteacher, Rachel Everett was never meant to cross paths with a gentleman such as Henry. What could such a worldly man ever see in her? As it turns out, everything. Beautiful, fiercely intelligent Rachel is Henry’s dream woman—and wife. Such a match would be scandalous for his family of course, and Rachel has no business meddling with a resident at the famed, rather draconian, Puddling Rehabilitation Foundation. All the better, for two lost souls with nothing to lose—and oh so very much to gain. Praise for Maggie Robinson’s Lady Anne’s Lover“Robinson never fails to provide plenty of brio, banter, and interpersonal heat…Fans of humorous historicals will enjoy this delightful romp.” —Publishers Weekly“A charming, fun Regency romp that combines an innovative, compelling plot with characters that jump off the page and a hot, captivating romance that will tug at heartstrings.” —Kirkus Reviews“Lively repartee and steamy sensuality, yet maintains the mystery to the very end.” —RT Book Reviews, 4 Stars
Schoolyard Snickers: Classy Jokes That Make the Grade (Make Me Laugh)
by Sam SchultzFunny jokes about schools, teachers, homework and everything else in school.
Schottenfreude: German Words for the Human Condition
by Ben SchottSchottenfreude is a unique, must-have dictionary, complete with newly coined words that explore the idiosyncrasies of life as only the German language can.Ever thought, There should be a German word for that? Well, thanks to the brilliantly original mind behind Schott&’s Original Miscellany, now there is. In what other language but German could you construct le mot juste for a secret love of bad foods, the inability to remember jokes, Sunday-afternoon depression, the urge to yawn, the glee of gossip, reassuring your hairdresser, delight at the changing of the seasons, the urge to hoard, or the ineffable pleasure of a cold pillow? A beguiling, ideal gift book for the Gelehrte or anyone on your list—just beware of rapidly expanding (and potentially incomprehensible) vocabularies.
Schüttel den Zuckerbaum (The Der Zuckerbaum #1)
by Heike Reifgens Nick WilgusBuch 1 in der Serie - Der ZuckerbaumFlapsig und immer einen kessen Spruch auf den Lippen: Wiley Cantrell ist laut, rasant und unverschämt. Und das muss er im Tiefsten Süden der USA auch sein, um sich tiefreligiöse Nachbarn und Familienmitglieder gleichermaßen vom Leib zu halten. Ein verkrachter Schriftsteller, lebt Wiley von Lebensmittelmarken, arbeitet für den Mindestlohn und kann sich und seinen tauben Sohn Noah nur mit Mühe über Wasser halten. Noah ist ein Drogenbaby, mit allen Geburtsdefekten, die dazugehören. Er sieht, wie einsam sein Vater ist und versucht, einen festen Freund für ihn zu finden. Derweil bemüht Wiley sich, Noah eine Beziehung zu seiner inhaftierten Mutter zu ermöglichen, die der Ansicht ist, dass die beste Methode, ein Kind zu füttern, eine Steinschleuder ist. Es ist also nicht überraschend, dass Noah Wileys größter Befürworter wird, als sich Krankenpfleger Jackson Ledbetter aus Boston an Wileys Kasse anstellt und seinen Zuckerbaum in Brand setzt. Jackson verliebt sich Hals über Kopf in Wileys Sinn für Humor. Und während Wiley in vielerlei Hinsicht das Beste am Süden repräsentiert, verbirgt Jackson ein Geheimnis, dass die neu entstehende Familie bedroht. Wenn Nord auf Süd trifft, sind kulturelle Missverständnisse vorprogrammiert, und es gibt viel Gelächter und viele Tränen, aber wie sie unten in Dixie sagen: Alles gut.
Sci-Fi Junior High (Sci-Fi Junior High #1)
by James Patterson Scott Seegert John MartinPresented by James Patterson's new children's imprint, this gleefully illustrated space adventure is a laugh on every page. That's a lot of laughs!Kelvin Klosmo isn't just the new kid at school - he's the new kid in the galaxy! Welcome to Sci-Fi Junior High: an inter-galactic space station with students of all shapes, sizes, smells, and... slime content. As the son of Earth's two most famous geniuses, Kelvin isn't just the smartest kid in the world....he's the smartest kid in the UNIVERSE. At least, that's what everybody at Sci-Fi Junior High thinks. So, maybe Kelvin lied a little about being a genius to fit in. And maybe a mad scientist is about to take over the universe unless Kelvin can stop him. Maybe everyone is doomed. Well, at least Kelvin won't have to worry about math homework anymore.Sci-Fi Junior High is an out-of-this-world story about friendship, accepting our differences, and the fight against evil... bunnies. Yes, evil bunnies - don't ask.
Sci-Fi Junior High: Crash Landing (Sci-Fi Junior High #2)
by Scott Seegert John MartinMiddle school in space! An alien dog! A mad scientist! Hundreds of illustrations! Sci-Fi Junior High is galactically good! James Patterson presents a hilarious space adventure featuring an average human kid getting into a universe of trouble.Kelvin is the new kid at Sci-Fi Junior High--a floating space station filled with alien kids form across the universe. And he arrived just in time for the annual school dance: The Galactic Get Down!Kelvin is desperate to take luminous Luna (her species literally glows), but now that his secret about not being a Mega Supergenius is out, Kelvin doesn't have a shot. He has to think of a way to become super cool so everyone forgets he lied about his average intelligence...Cue mad scientist Erik Failenheimer's escape from his asteroid prison, an army of Pinions (any similarities to the MinionsTM is purely coincidental), and a battle to save Sci-Fi Junior High from imminent doom. Let's dance!"Saving the universe has never been so much fun!" -- Gordon Korman, #1 New York Times bestselling author of 39 Clues and Masterminds on Sci-Fi Junior High.
Science No Fair!: Project Droid #1 (Project Droid)
by Nancy Krulik Amanda Burwasser Mike MoranHilarious story about a slightly crazy science and engineering experimentLogan Applebaum tries to keep his new robot cousin, Java, a secretLogan’s science fair rivals steal Java, and Logan worries they’ll discover Java’s true identity If you thought your science fair experience was nerve-wracking, try being Logan Applebaum. One day, his inventor mother declares that she made a new robot cousin for Logan, Java. Java might be incredibly bright, but he’ll also be quite the handful. Logan had a picture of how the third grade would go. Java was not part of that picture. As the third grade science fair gets closer and the kids prepare for their experiments, Logan thinks Java will come in handy. He can at least help Logan beat the Silverspoon twins, who always win everything. Unfortunately for Logan, the twins Sherry and Jerry steal Java as their partner. Even worse, these kids become suspicious. Can Logan work quickly enough to keep a crazy experiment from becoming a crazier disaster? Join mother-daughter author duo Nancy Krulik and Amanda Burwasser as they introduce the comedic pair of Logan and Java. This first installment of their Project Droid #1 story reminds readers of Amelia Bedelia with a delightful modern edge. Science No Fair! is an excellent pre- bedtime book choice.
Science...For Her!
by Megan AmramMegan Amram, one of Forbes' "30 Under 30 in Hollywood & Entertainment," Rolling Stone's "25 Funniest People on Twitter," and a writer for NBC's hit show Parks and Recreation, delivers a politically, scientifically, and anatomically incorrect "textbook" that will have women screaming with laughter, and men dying to know what the noise is about.In the vein of faux expert books by John Hodgman and Amy Sedaris, Science...for Her! is ostensibly a book of science written by a denizen of women's magazines. Comedy writer and Twitter sensation Megan Amram showcases her fiendish wit with a pitch-perfect attack on everything from those insanely perky tips for self-improvement to our bizarre shopaholic dating culture to the socially mandated pursuit of mind-blowing sex to the cringe-worthy secret codes of food and body issues. Part hilarious farce, part biting gender commentary, Amram blends Cosmo and science to highlight absurdities with a machine-gun of laugh-inducing lines that leave nothing and no one unscathed. Subjects include: this Spring's ten most glamorous ways to die; tips for hosting your own big bang; what religion is right for your body type; and the most pressing issue facing women today: kale!!! Be prepared to laugh about anything in this outrageous satirical gem.
Sckraight From The Ghetto: You Know You're Ghetto If . . .
by Bertice Berry Joan CokerIs the only art you own on your fingernails? Do you consider kool-aid one of the five food groups?You know you're ghetto if:-Turning up the heat means turning on another burner on the stove-You think of paneling as a home improvement-You use a pair of pliers to change the channel on your TV-You run to get pots as soon as it rains-Your glasses and silverware come from a gas station-Your weave is longer than your torso-You have more than ten uses for Vaseline-and one of them is shoe polishGhetto is not where you live. Ghetto is not about income or social status. Ghetto is a state of mind.
Scones and Sensibility
by Lindsay ElandSeek tirelessly and you shall not find a contemporary heroine of middle-grade literature as refined and romantic as Miss Polly Madassa. Still swooning over the romantic conclusions of Pride & Prejudice and Anne of Green Gables, twelve-year-old Polly decides her purpose in life: helping along lonely hearts in search of love. Polly's only task this summer is to make deliveries for her parents' bakery, leaving ample time for this young cupid to find hearts to mend—beginning with the kite-store owner, Mr. Nightquist, who will pair perfectly with Miss Wiskerton (the unfairly labeled town curmudgeon). Polly's best friend Fran Fisk is in desperate need of a mother ever since hers ran off with a man she met on the Internet; Polly must find a match for Mr. Fisk. And while she's at it, it wouldn't hurt to find Clementine, Polly's teenaged sister, a beau worthy of her (so she can shed that brute, Clint). Polly's plans are in full swing, so she definitely cannot be bothered by the advances of classmate Brad Barker. But maybe Polly should have turned her attention to Miss Austen's Emma next, because she quickly learns the pitfalls of playing matchmaker. How will Polly patch up her own relationships, while ensuring that destined love can take its course?
Scooby-Doo and the Pirate Treasure (Little Golden Book)
by Golden BooksScooby-Doo, Shaggy, and the rest of the meddling kids return in a classic Little Golden Book!Join Scooby-Doo and Shaggy for a day at the beach that becomes a treasure hunt filled with spooky houses and ghostly pirates. Girls and boys ages 2 to 5 will enjoy this fun-filled adventure featuring their friends from Mystery Incorporated. First published in 1974, this classic Little Golden Book is sure to thrill new fans and collectors of all ages.