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Awards for Good Boys: Tales of Dating, Double Standards, and Doom
by Shelby Lorman“Shelby and her art are extremely my shit. You need this book.” —Samantha Irby, New York Times bestselling author of We Are Never Meeting in Real LifeA wickedly funny illustrated look at living and dating in a patriarchal culture that celebrates men for displaying the bare minimum of human decency, from the creator of the wildly popular Instagram account @AwardsForGoodBoysSurely you’re familiar with good boys. They’re the ones who put “feminist” in their Tinder bio but talk overyou the entire date. They ghost you, but they feel momentarily guilty. They once read a book by a woman author. (It was required, but they thought it was “okay.”) And of course, they bravely condemn sexual harassment (except when the perpetrator is their buddy Chad).This book explores why so-called and self-proclaimed good boys are actually not so great, breaking down our obsession with celebrating male mediocrity and rewarding those who clear the very low bar of not being outwardly awful. Through clever illustrations and written vignettes, Awards for Good Boys makes literal the tendency to applaud men for doing the absolute least and offers hilarious and cathartic cultural commentary through which we may begin to unravel our own assumptions about gender roles and how we treat each other, both on and offline.
Away From It All: a delightful, light-hearted and heart-warming novel about finding the right life for you…
by Judy AstleyFans of Trisha Ashley, Jenny Colgan and Milly Johnson will love this irresistible and uplifting read in which two differing world views collide from much-loved and ever-popular author Judy Astley. You'll be hooked!'Warm, funny, and unerringly true to life' - Katie Fforde'A laugh out loud read' - Woman's Own'Wickedly funny' - Daily Mail'A lively laughter-packed riot of a story' - Heat'I bought "Away From It All" on the spur of the moment and liked it so much that I will buy another Judy Astley title immediately.' -- ***** Reader review'Great escapism' -- ***** Reader review'A fun read' -- ***** Reader review***********************************************************************************IS HER LIFE REALLY GOING THE WAY SHE WANTS IT TO?Alice has a scrupulously organised, comfortable life in West London with Noel - her second husband whose main ambition in life is to sharpen his golf handicap in time for retirement. But when her mother Jocelyn, residing in shabby splendour in a crumbling house on a clifftop in Cornwall, becomes ill, Alice and the family goes to look after her.What she finds there appals her: her glorious childhood home falling into decay. Noel, helpfully, thinks Jocelyn should offload the house ('She's sitting on a goldmine, you know') and move into sensible sheltered accommodation.But their children love the freedom and beauty that they discover in Cornwall, and Alice begins to wonder whether her chosen way of life is necessarily the right one . . .
Away in a Star Sled (Geronimo Stilton Spacemice #8)
by Geronimo StiltonSpacemouse Geronimo Stiltonix's adventures are out of this world!Each year on the Night of Dancing Stars, the elfix aliens distribute gifts to all the creatures of the galaxy. But this year, the holiday is fast approaching, and the spacemice discover that the elfix have all disappeared! Can Geronimo Stiltonix and his crew find them before their special night?
Away with Words: An Irreverent Tour Through the World of Pun Competitions
by Joe Berkowitz"[Away with Words] is low wit in its highest form. . . Mr. Berkowitz is sensitive throughout to the evanescence and contingency of punning and to the fleeting chemistry of a live pun-on-pun matchup crackling with energy." –Wall Street JournalFast Company reporter Joe Berkowitz investigates the bizarre and hilarious world of pun competitions from the Punderdome 3000 in Brooklyn to the World competition in Austin.When Joe Berkowitz witnessed his first Punderdome competition, it felt wrong in the best way. Something impossible seemed to be happening. The kinds of jokes we learn to repress through social conditioning were not only being aired out in public—they were being applauded. As it turned out, this monthly show was part of a subculture that’s been around in one form or another since at least the late ‘70s. Its pinnacle is the O. Henry Pun Off World Championship, an annual tournament in Austin, Texas. As someone who is terminally self-conscious, Joe was both awed and jealous of these people who confidently killed with the most maligned form of humor. In this immersive ride into the subversive world of pun competitions, we meet punsters weird and wonderful and Berkowitz is our tour guide. Puns may show up in life in subtle ways sometimes, but once you start thinking in puns you discover they’re everywhere. Berkowitz’s search to discover who makes them the most, and why, leads him to the professional comedian competitors on @Midnight, a TV show with a pun competition built into it, the writing staff of Bob’s Burgers, the punniest show on TV, and even a humor research conference. With his new unlikely band of punster brothers, he finally heads to Austin to compete in the World Championship. Of course, in befriending these comic misfits he also ended up learning that when you embrace puns you become a more authentic version of yourself.
Awesome Achievers in Science: Super and Strange Facts about 12 Almost Famous History Makers (Awesome Achievers #2)
by Alan Katz Chris JudgePart of a super fun middle grade series, Awesome Achievers in Science puts the spotlight on lesser-known heroes and their contributions in major scientific fields.Everyone has heard the names Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin, but what about Michael Collins--the third brave Apollo 11 astronaut who didn't get to walk on the moon? Many of the most relevant figures in scientific history have remained in the shadows, but not any longer! From Alan Katz's new Awesome Achievers series, Awesome Achievers in Science gives kids a look behind the scenes at 12 lesser-known scientists whose contributions are personally relevant to their lives today. Each figure is given a traditional biography but is also subject to Katz's unique brand of silliness, with humorous elements such as imagined poems, song lyrics, and diary entries by or about the not-so-famous figure accompanying each bio. Spot illustrations throughout add to the lighthearted and appreciative humor each figure receives. Reluctant readers and budding scientists alike will delight in this imaginative and engaging continuation of a new series of laugh-out-loud biographies.
Awesome Achievers in Technology: Super and Strange Facts about 12 Almost Famous History Makers (Awesome Achievers)
by Alan Katz Chris JudgePart of a super fun middle grade series, Awesome Achievers in Technology puts the spotlight on lesser-known heroes and their contributions in tech.Everyone has heard the name Steve Jobs, but what about Nolan Bushnell--Jobs's boss before the invention of Apple, and the founder of the first major video game, Pong? Many of the most relevant figures in tech history have remained in the shadows, but not any longer! From Alan Katz's new Awesome Achievers series, Awesome Achievers in Technology gives kids a look behind the scenes at 12 lesser-known inventors whose contributions to tech are personally relevant to their lives today. Each figure is given a traditional biography but is also subject to Katz's unique brand of silliness, with humorous elements such as imagined poems, song lyrics, and diary entries by and about the not-so-famous figure accompanying each bio. Spot illustrations throughout add to the lighthearted and appreciative humor each figure receives. Reluctant readers and budding tech enthusiasts alike will delight in this imaginative and engaging introduction to a new series of laugh out loud biographies.
Awesome Bill from Dawsonville: My Life in NASCAR
by Bill Elliott Chris MillardIn this long-awaited autobiography, the legendary Bill Elliott details his childhood in rural North Georgia, building cars from scratch, struggling on the anonymous small-time tracks of the South to his against-the-odds rise to the pinnacle of NASCAR stardom: Winston Cup Champion. From Daytona to Talladega, from Bristol to Sonoma, ride shoulder to shoulder with Elliott as he battles Dale Earnhardt, Darrell Waltrip, Ricky Rudd, Rusty Wallace, and Alan Kulwicki for NASCAR's ultimate prize. Through Elliott's eyes we meet the colorful cast of old-school characters who built NASCAR: Cale Yarborough, Junior Johnson, the Allisons, Carl Kiekhaefer, and, of course, the France family. We join Bill in the car (and under it) as he sets the all-time record for the fastest official speed ever recorded in a stock car (a record he still holds today). Learn the secret—revealed for the first time—behind the Elliott family's unquestioned mastery of the sport's super speedways. Watch NASCAR grow from a southern diversion into a national phenomenon, and see Bill Elliott grow with it, ultimately becoming one of the sport's most popular heroes. In 1985 Elliott captured the inaugural Winston Million and became the first NASCAR driver ever to appear on the cover of Sports Illustrated. Three years later he captured the Winston Cup Championship. He went on to be voted NASCAR Driver of the Decade for the 1980s by NASCAR fans. He was also voted Most Popular Driver sixteen times. Elliott also shares his thoughts on the dark side of the racing life: the stresses it can place on relationships, the ever-present physical risks, and the weight of fame. He addresses the racing-related deaths of competitors and friends. He is candid and critical in discussing the intense rivalry between him and the late Dale Earnhardt, and he sheds new light on their storied relationship as well as on Earnhardt's shocking death. Elliott discusses the future of NASCAR with critiques of its management and restrictor plates, and he takes on the controversial issues of track and driver safety. A window into the compelling personality of Bill Elliott, as well as a primer on the ascent of America's fastestgrowing sport, this is the definitive insider's view of the rising NASCAR nation.
Awesome Dinosaur Jokes for Kids
by Bob PhillipsDinosaur knock, knock jokes; ding-a-ling dinsoaur jokes; woolly mammoth jokes; and dignified, delightful, dashing, dinky and dangerous dinosaur jokes
Awesome Dog 5000 (Awesome Dog 5000 #1)
by Justin DeanHeads up, DOG MAN lovers! Watch out, readers of BAD GUYS! Robotic dog AWESOME DOG 5000 is in the neighborhood and he's. . . well, he's awesome.Marty, Ralph, and Skyler might make the ultimate secret combo when battling alien-slime ninjas in their favorite video game, but in real life they're just regular kids. That is, until the three best friends discover Awesome Dog 5000, a robotic dog with very real power-ups. Awesome Dog can "bark" a sonic boom, "walk" at speeds over three hundred miles per hour, and "fetch" with an atomic cannon. Life for Marty, Ralph, and Skyler just got a major turbo-boost!Attention, readers! AWESOME DOG 5000 is a wild action-comedy told through a mix of text and black-and-white illustrations, with a mystery to solve at the end. Can you handle the awesomeness?
Awesome Dog 5000 vs. The Kitty-Cat Cyber Squad (Awesome Dog 5000 #3)
by Justin DeanHeads up, DOG MAN lovers! Watch out, readers of BAD GUYS! Robotic dog AWESOME DOG 5000 is back in his third action-packed adventure!Evil Cat vs. Awesome Dog! Get ready to meet Awesome Dog's number one fan--Tina Tinkerwith. Tina's an obsessed toy designer who'll stop at NOTHING to get close to her idol, even if it means becoming a SUPERVILLAIN herself! Find out what happens when Awesome Dog and his pals face off against Tina and her army of robotic kitty toys in the AWESOMEST Awesome Dog yet! The claws are coming out to settle the age-old debate once and for all, which is better? Cats or dogs?Attention, readers! AWESOME DOG 5000 is a wild action-comedy told through a mix of text and black-and-white illustrations, with a mystery to solve at the end. Can you handle the awesomeness?
Awesome Dog 5000 vs. Mayor Bossypants (Awesome Dog 5000 #2)
by Justin DeanHeads up, DOG MAN lovers! Watch out, readers of BAD GUYS! Robotic dog AWESOME DOG 5000 is back in another action-packed adventure with some upgrades. . .just in time to battle a new supervillain!Time to level up the awesomeness! Ever since discovering Awesome Dog 5000, life for gamers Marty, Ralph, and Skyler has been one epic adventure! But Awesome Dog's spectacular hero work has made front page news -- and Mayor Bossypants is not happy about it. The mayor makes a plan to take down that robot dog. . . and anyone else who stands in his way. Which means Marty, Ralph, and Skyler are about to have a real-life Bossypants battle!Attention, readers! This is a wild action-comedy told through a mix of text and black-and-white illustrations, with a mystery to solve at the end. Can you handle the awesomeness?Want to replay the first adventure? Check out the first book: Awesome Dog 5000!
The Awesome Game: One Man's Incredible, Globe-Crushing Hockey Odyssey
by Dave HillOne man's search to answer the ultimate question in sports: Why is hockey so incredibly awesome?Dave Hill--author, actor, rock musician and stand-up comedian--is a truly outstanding American. For one thing, he's part Canadian (an advantage he explored in his previous book Parking the Moose). For another, and maybe this has something to do with his Canadian heritage, he's a totally obsessive fan of hockey. That makes him a minority within a minority: apparently only five percent of the US population admit to liking hockey more than any other sport.In his latest opus, Dave--who's from Cleveland, which hasn't had an NHL team since 1978--tackles this hockey conundrum with full force, drilling down into what makes hockey so damn important in so many parts of the world, despite the average American not recognizing the sport's preeminent greatness. His search for the very soul of hockey has taken him across the globe, from Poland to LA to Kenya, and brought him into contact with many of the sport's great and good. Humorous but heartfelt, Bill Bryson-like but hipper, this is arguably the greatest book ever written about hockey and definitely the one to be asking for at Christmas.
The Awesome Guide to Life: Get Fit, Get Laid, Get Your Sh*t Together
by Jason Ellis Mike TullyIn the same inimitable, uncensored, and hilarious style that has made him one of the most popular voices on satellite radio, Jason Ellis unleashes his no-holds-barred words of advice on diet and exercise, cultivating your signature look, partying, getting laid, maintaining a relationship—and more!Maybe—like Jason Ellis—you want to have sex with multiple partners and then talk about it on the radio while wearing cheetah pants . . .Or maybe you have some goals of your own. Whatever the case may be, Jason believes it's all about getting off your ass and maximizing the opportunities that life has to offer. It's about remembering that you are alive, right now, and that won't always be the case. So do something. Anything. Enjoy the ride. Go outside and get naked.Jason can tell you how to handle every situation life throws at you and play it like a champ: how to look, how to act, how to pick up a stripper—you name it.But that's just for starters. Jason believes that to get what you really want out of life, you have to have confidence. And true confidence is something you have to earn, by deciding what you want from life and then pursuing your passion until you make your dreams a reality.This book will show you how to develop the positive attitude that will allow you to truly make things happen.
The Awesome, Impossible, Unstoppable Gadget
by Kevin Kelly Rebecca KellyThe Awesome, Impossible, Unstoppable Gadget is an inspiring picture book from Kevin Kelly and Rebecca Kelly about incredible inventions going haywire illustrates that with persistence, anyone can be awesome, impossible, and unstoppable. Trixie O’Toole is super-excited to be at Camp Create, where she can invent whatever she likes. But when a boy nicknamed “Professor” von Junk gets all the attention, Trixie feels left out. Still, she persists in following her own inspiration. When von Junk’s Invention Inventor goes out of control, everyone is horrified. Is Trixie’s own invention sufficiently awesome, impossible, and unstoppable to save the day?Trixie’s triumph will inspire future inventors and mad scientists to believe in themselves, and show that all good ideas deserve a chance.An Imprint Book“Bold animation-style illustrations bring Camp C.R.E.A.T.E. and its Gadgets Galore Competition to life ... An action-packed story.” —Kirkus Reviews
Awesome Man: The Mystery Intruder
by Michael ChabonAwesome Man, our favorite superhero, is back, and in this fantastic sequel from New York Times bestselling author Michael Chabon, he must prepare for his greatest threat yet! Awesome Man’s secret identity has stayed safe, and he’s still the coolest superhero around. He loves protecting the people of Awesome City from evildoers, like the giant Plutonian octolizard, with his trusty sidekick, Moskowitz. But there have been reports that a new hero is coming to town soon. What if the people of Awesome City no longer need Awesome Man? With 40 pages of awesome text and illustrations, this book is a great gift for the superhero-obsessed and any kid adjusting to life with a new sibling!
The Awful Orphan Elf: Book 4 (Monster Hospital #4)
by Gillian JohnsonAlfonse, a one-eyed orphan elf, has arrived at Monster Hospital by helicopter. He's a football star, but a troll sat on his head and now he's seeing double! Can four naughty children help him get better - and rescue him from his greedy leprechaun manager?This book follows the first three Monster Hospital adventures, THE BIG, FAT, SMELLY OGRE, THE DISASTROUS LITTLE DRAGON and THE YUCKY YODELLING YETI, and is written and illustrated by the acclaimed author-illustrator of the THORA books.
An Awfully Big Adventure: Shortlisted for the Booker Prize, 1990
by Beryl Bainbridge'This is one of Bainbridge's best books. The close observation and hilarity are underlain by a sense of tragedy as deep as any in fiction' The TimesSHORTLISTED FOR THE BOOKER PRIZE IN 1990It is 1950 and the Liverpool repertory theatre company is rehearsing its Christmas production of Peter Pan, a story of childhood innocence and loss. Stella has been taken on as assistant stage manager and quickly becomes obsessed with Meredith, the dissolute director. But it is only when the celebrated O'Hara arrives to take the lead, that a different drama unfolds. In it, he and Stella are bound together in a past that neither dares to interpret.
Awkwafina's NYC
by Nora LumWalking shoes? Check. Metrocard? Check. Sombrero? (Just a suggestion.) ONWARD! Let Awkwafina--the Queens-born rap artist of "NYC Bitches" fame--be your guide to the hidden gems of New York City (natives, we're talking to you, too.) with 10 walking tour adventures that you don't need a trust fund to enjoy. Travel back in time exploring revolutionary-era Tottenville or Louis Armstrong's house in Corona. Gorge yourself on the haute-cuisine of the street-savvy, from authentic pierogi in Little Poland to steam dumplings in Flushing. Roll with Awkwafina, and she'll show you the neighborhoods you never knew you were missing (and a few you were missing the point of). This edition includes enhaced features that allow you to connect to a map from each checkpoint and plot your next moves at the click of a button.
Awkward.: What To Do When Life Makes You Cringe--a Survival Guide
by Sam ScholfieldNo One Is Safe from Awkward! Ending a first date that falls flat. Drunk-texting your boss. Walking in when your roommate is getting it on. Running into the person you just dumped . . . in the grocery store, an hour after it went down. Awkward bombs can drop anytime, anywhere, and with anyone—people you don’t know, people you see occasionally, and people you see every day. They can sneak up on you and explode in the most unexpected of places, so they’re basically impossible to avoid. The vast majority of us don’t have the wherewithal to gracefully handle the truly and totally awkward as it unfolds. We only realize what we should have said after the fact—when the damage has already been done and we’re a hot mess of embarrassment, red ears, and nervous sweat stains. But author Sam Scholfield has survived more than two decades of embarrassing encounters—and now, in an act of extreme generosity, has set down a wealth of witty comebacks, surefire distraction techniques, and suave evasion strategies so that future generations may take heed and dodge the Awkward Monster before it strikes! So how do you avoid the epic cluster of drama that can result when awkward situations are handled badly? You read this book.
Awkward Family Holiday Photos
by Doug Chernack Mike BenderFrom the authors of the New York Times bestsellers Awkward Family Photos and Awkward Family Pet Photos comes a celebration of those special times throughout the year when our families embarrass us the most . . . the holidays.Holidays. They're those momentous occasions when we gather with family to eat, drink, celebrate, and, of course, pose for photographs. From Mom's homemade Halloween costumes to re-creating a Nativity scene for the Christmas card to that overly patriotic uncle who literally wears the flag on the Fourth, holidays make for humiliating memories that we carry in our hearts for years to come. Whether your family loves Valentine's Day, St. Patrick's Day, Easter, July Fourth, Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, or Hanukkah, this book pays homage to all of the holidays' most uncomfortable moments.
Awkward Family Pet Photos
by Doug Chernack Mike BenderThe authors of the New York Times bestseller Awkward Family Photos are back with a hilarious tribute to the unbreakable and sometimes uncomfortable bond between people and their pets.There are few things more rewarding than having a pet. They love us unconditionally, shower us with attention, and because of them, we actually live longer. So, what can possibly be awkward about our animal BFFs? Well . . . nothing. In fact, we're the awkward ones. We adore our pets, but let's face it--sometimes L-O-V-E makes us go a little overboard. Like giving them middle names, throwing them elaborate birthday parties, and making them a Christmas sweater to match with the rest of the family. Truth is, what they cherish most is our companionship. And maybe that's the reason we care about them so much--because for such simple pleasures, they allow us to be as awkward as we want.From the Trade Paperback edition.
Awkward Family Photos
by Doug Chernack Mike BenderWith twenty-five new photographs for the eBook edition, the New York Times bestseller is now more awkward than ever Based on the hit website, AwkwardFamilyPhotos.com ("painful, regrettable, horrifyingly awesome snaps of family bonding, you will laugh so hard that people in adjoining offices will ask what's wrong with you"--Esquire), this full color book features never-before-seen photos and hilarious personal stories covering everything from uncomfortable moments with relatives, teen angst, sibling rivalry, and family vacations from hell. Cringe at the forced poses, bad hair, and matching outfits--all prompting us to look at our own families and celebrate the fact that we're not alone. Nothing says awkward better than an uncomfortable family photograph!
The Awkward Path to Getting Lucky: A Novel
by Summer HeacockIn thirty-four days, it will have been exactly two years to the day since I’ve had sex. Having sex wasn’t exactly high on Kat Carmichael’s priority list while her successful bakery was taking off, especially since things hadn’t been working very well in that department. And the last time she and her boyfriend, Ryan, even attempted the act, they found it to be physically impossible—resulting in pain and disappointment for Kat instead of sunshine and orgasms.With just over a month until their four-year anniversary, Kat calls for a break in her relationship with Ryan, encouraging him to see other people while she throws herself into physical therapy. Yet even with the well-intentioned (but wildly inappropriate) attempts at help from her best friends, Kat quickly discovers that a solo mission may not be the best approach.Fortunately, physical therapist Ben Cleary, the shop’s best (looking) customer, volunteers to help out—strictly as a friend, of course. But as the line between love and friendship begins to blur, Kat stands to lose much more than a functioning set of lady bits if she can’t figure out what to hang on to…and what to let go.
The Awkward Squad (MacLehose Press Editions #3)
by Sophie HénaffSuspended from her job as a promising police officer for firing "one bullet too many", Anne Capestan is expecting the worst when she is summoned to H.Q. to learn her fate. Instead, she is surprised to be told that she is to head up a new police squad, working on solving old cold cases.Though relieved to still have a job, Capestan is not overjoyed by the prospect of her new role. Even less so when she meets her new team: a crowd of misfits, troublemakers and problem cases, none of whom are fit for purpose and yet none of whom can be fired.But from this inauspicious start, investigating the cold cases throws up a number a number of strange mysteries for Capestan and her team: was the old lady murdered seven years ago really just the victim of a botched robbery? Who was behind the dead sailor discovered in the Seine with three gunshot wounds? And why does there seem to be a curious link with a ferry that was shipwrecked off the Florida coast many years previously?Translated from the French by Sam Gordon
The Awkward Squad
by Sophie HénaffSuspended from her job as a promising police officer for firing "one bullet too many", Anne Capestan is expecting the worst when she is summoned to H.Q. to learn her fate. Instead, she is surprised to be told that she is to head up a new police squad, working on solving old cold cases.Though relieved to still have a job, Capestan is not overjoyed by the prospect of her new role. Even less so when she meets her new team: a crowd of misfits, troublemakers and problem cases, none of whom are fit for purpose and yet none of whom can be fired.But from this inauspicious start, investigating the cold cases throws up a number a number of strange mysteries for Capestan and her team: was the old lady murdered seven years ago really just the victim of a botched robbery? Who was behind the dead sailor discovered in the Seine with three gunshot wounds? And why does there seem to be a curious link with a ferry that was shipwrecked off the Florida coast many years previously?Translated from the French by Sam Gordon