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The Ones Volume 1
by Brian Michael BendisFrom the writer who brought you Marvel&’s Illuminati, New Avengers, Uncanny X-Men, comes the next, best awesome super team to end all super teams… THE ONES!Every single person in every mythology that was told they were THE ONE are brought together for the first time to defeat.... THE ONE. The actual one. The real actual one.This amazing new vision is brought to life by wunderkind artist and co-creator Jacob Edgar (Batman, Army of Darkness). Watch as he brings explosive comics splendor to this big new world! Think Good Omens meets Ghostbusters meets The Adam Project meets The Goonies meets Everything Everywhere All at Once meets, um, anything else you&’ve ever liked!
The Onion and Philosophy: Fake News Story True Alleges Indignant Area Professor
by Sharon M. KayeThis book is full of ballsy commentary from internationally acclaimed super-intellectuals on all of the best Onion articles.
The Onion Magazine: The Iconic Covers that Transformed an Undeserving World
by The OnionCovers That Matter For People Who Don'tFrom America's Finest News Source comes a compilation of the most important, most influential, and glossiest magazine covers ever produced by the hand of humankind. Seen by tens of billions worldwide, these are the unforgettable Onion Magazine covers that altered the course of human history and radically redefined your trivial life anew every weekend. Profound philosophical questions, the thoughts of leading cultural luminaries, harsh truths of existence, remorseless personal attacks -- you will encounter full-color graphical representations of all of these within this handsome volume. Whether you are a connoisseur of pretty pictures or are new to looking at images, The Onion Magazine: The Iconic Covers That Transformed an Undeserving World is sure to give you, the feebleminded consumer, far more pleasure than you have any earthly right to experience.
The Onion Presents: Christmas Exposed
by The Onion StaffChristmas wouldn't be Christmas without impulse-priced holiday gift books--and now The Onion has unleashed its award-winning team of investigative journalists upon the genre. Christmas Exposed features more than one hundred shocking tales of Secret Santas, shopping mall mayhem, dysfunctional family dinners, and much, much more.From the Trade Paperback edition.
Only a Memory Away
by Madeline St. ClaireA dark, mysterious stranger...even to himselfJudd Maxwell had no memories. No past. He had nothing to call his own-except a recurring nightmare that left him sweat drenched and shaken...and certain that his nightly terrors would come true.Social worker Karen Thomas was assigned to help "John Doe" regain his memory, but nothing about Judd Maxwell added up. Every clue she uncovered to his past resulted in another question. The only sure thing was that she was falling in love with a stranger....Judd asked Karen for just one night of rapture, but his constant fear remained: when his memory returned, would the nightmare of doubt end, or had he unwittingly put her life-and his-in jeopardy?
Only and Forever (The Bergman Brothers #7)
by Chloe LieseIt&’s a room-mance for the books in this tender, steamy story about unexpectedly finding love and being brave enough to let it revise life&’s narrative in the final book in the beloved Bergman Brothers series. Viggo Bergman, hopeless romantic, is thoroughly weary of waiting for his happily ever after. But between opening a romance bookstore, running a romance book club, coaching kids' soccer, and adopting a household of pets—just maybe, he&’s overcommitted himself?—Viggo&’s chaotic life has made finding his forever love seem downright improbable. Enter Tallulah Clarke, chilly cynic with a massive case of writer&’s block. Tallulah needs help with her thriller&’s romantic subplot. Viggo needs another pair of hands to keep his store afloat. So they agree to swap skills and cohabitate for convenience—his romance expertise to revive her book, her organizational prowess to salvage his store. They hardly get along, and they couldn&’t be more different, but who says roommate-coworkers need to be friends? As they share a home and life, Tallulah and Viggo discover a connection that challenges everything they believe about love, and reveals the plot twist they never saw coming: happily ever after is here already, right under their roof.
Only Ants for Andy
by Jashar AwanThis funny, satisfying picture book from the author of What a Lucky Day! gives a fresh spin to a familiar childhood theme: trying new things. I’m Andy And I like what I like! Andy is a very particular anteater. He has his favorite toys, his favorite song, his favorite food . . . Ants! They’re the best! But when Andy goes for a sleepover with his favorite friend, Sam Sloth, he’s faced with unfamiliar things to play with—and strange new foods for dinner. Jashar Awan’s winning and gently funny story celebrates trying something new and finding out it might be more fun—and tastier—than it looks.
Only Begotten Daughter (Legend Bks.)
by James MorrowThe World Fantasy Award–winning novel of a female deity trying to save a modern world gone mad—&“Invites comparisons with Vonnegut and even Rushdie&” (The Washington Post). Rejoice! A new messiah has come, and her name is Julie. Born to Murray Katz, the solitary (and celibate) keeper of an abandoned lighthouse on the Jersey shore, our protagonist arrives on Earth boasting supernatural abilities evocative of her divine half brother, Jesus. As a child, she revels in her talent for walking on water, resurrecting dead crabs, and treating fireflies as luminous alphabet blocks. But after she reaches adolescence, her life becomes as challenging and ambiguous as any mortal&’s. Not only is Julie Katz obliged to deal with a silver-tongued devil and self-righteous neo-Christian zealots, she must also figure out what sort of mission her mother—the female Supreme Being—has in mind for her. At once outrageous and affirming, this Nebula Award finalist is a magnificent work of contemporary satire that holds a mirror up to human nature, astutely reflecting our species&’ failings, foibles, and often misguided affections.
Only Big Bumbum Matters Tomorrow: A Novel
by Damilare KukuFrom the bestselling author of Nearly All the Men in Lagos Are Mad comes a powerful polyphonic novel about family secrets, judgmental aunties, and Brazilian butt lifts. Freshly out of university, 20-year-old Temi has a clear plan for her future: she is going to surgically enlarge her backside like all the other Nigerian women, move from Ile-Ife to Lagos, and meet a man who will love her senseless. When she finally finds the courage to tell her mother, older sister, and aunties, at the funeral of her beloved father, her announcement causes an uproar - because in Nigerian families, none of your business is private. Not even if it&’s about your bumbum. But as each of the other women try to cure Temi of what they consider to be insanity, the long-buried secrets that bind and separate them are spilled in the process. In the end, it seems like Temi might be the sanest of them all…In Only Big Bumbum Matters Tomorrow, Damilare Kuku brings her signature humor, boldness, and compassion to each member of this loveable but exasperating family, whose lives reveal the ways in which a woman&’s physical appearance can dictate her life and relationships and show just how sharp the double-edged sword of beauty can be.Praise for Only Big Bumbum Matters Tomorrow: 'Damilare Kuku, queen of the banging book title, knows how complicated it is to be a Nigerian woman. This book explores themes weightier than any BBL but never preaches. Kuku made me giggle and gasp. I loved it' Nikki May, author of Wahala and This Motherless Land 'In her latest work Only Big Bumbum Matters Tomorrow, Kuku paints a vibrant intergenerational portrait of the female condition in Nigeria... Funny, fierce, and heartfelt!' Chioma Okereke, author of Bitter Leaf & Water Baby &‘Both tender and hilarious, Only Big Bumbum Matters Tomorrow addresses the impossible decisions that women in patriarchal societies have to make. Damilare Kuku is an enthralling storyteller, handling the boisterous harmony of this multigenerational cast of female characters with compassion and flair&’ Jendella Benson, author of Hope & Glory
Only Children
by Rafael YglesiasA loving satire of new parenthood and its attendant joys and blunders from a master of contemporary American fictionThe Golds and the Hummels live in the same wealthy Manhattan neighborhood, but as both couples prepare for the arrival of their first child, they share little in terms of parenting philosophy. The Golds plunge into natural birth without bothering to first set up a nursery. The Hummels schedule a C-section and fill out hospital admissions paperwork weeks in advance. Both couples, however, are grappling with the transformations they know parenthood will immediately bring. Set in a milieu of material excess and limitless ambition, Only Children skewers new parents who expect perfect lives, but also offers an intimate look at the trials all new parents face as they learn how to nurture. This ebook features a new illustrated biography of Rafael Yglesias, including rare photos and never-before-seen documents from the author&’s personal collection.
Only Dead on the Inside: A Parent's Guide to Surviving the Zombie Apocalypse
by James BreakwellIt's not easy being a parent these days. There are bills to pay. Kids to feed. And hordes of undead monsters to keep at bay. There are plenty of guides out there about how to survive the zombie apocalypse. All of them assume readers are young, fit, and unencumbered by children. In that scenario, the only living humans left will be smug, outdoorsy Millennials. That's hell on earth, even without the zombies. Only Dead on the Inside is the answer for the rest of us. Written by professional comedy writer and amateur father-of-four James Breakwell (@XplodingUnicorn), Only Dead on the Inside blends traditional parenting advice with zombie survival tips, bringing together two totally unrelated genres in a book no one asked for but everyone needs. This step-by-step manual teaches you how to raise happy, healthy children in a world overrun by the undead. Motivated moms and dads want it all, and that won't change at the end of the world. There's no reason you can't be a zombie killing machine AND parent of the year, but you have to work for it. If you want to make sure your family is apocalypse-ready, Only Dead on the Inside is your best―and only―chance at survival. No pressure, but if you don't read this book, your children will die.
Only Dull People Are Brilliant at Breakfast (Penguin Little Black Classics)
by Oscar Wilde'It would be unfair to expect other people to be as remarkable as oneself'Wilde's celebrated witticisms on the dangers of sincerity, duplicitous biographers, the stupidity of the English - and his own genius. One of 46 new books in the bestselling Little Black Classics series, to celebrate the first ever Penguin Classic in 1946. Each book gives readers a taste of the Classics' huge range and diversity, with works from around the world and across the centuries - including fables, decadence, heartbreak, tall tales, satire, ghosts, battles and elephants.
Only for the Holidays: Cuddle up with a cosy happy-ever-after this Christmas!
by Abiola BelloThe Spanish Love Deception meets The Holiday in this fake dating romance about a city girl and country boy&’s lives colliding at Christmas. City girl Tia Solanké is dreading the festive period. She&’s on a break with her boyfriend and the last thing she wants to do is spend Christmas away from London. Arriving at Saiyan Hedge Farm, Tia takes an instant disliking to it. She falls in horse manure, is chased by sheep and the Wi-Fi sucks. How is she meant to stalk her ex now and concoct a foolproof plan to win him back? Country boy Quincy Parker and his family run the farm, and this year they&’ve been selected to host the biggest event in the town's calendar – the Winter Ball. Preparations are underway, and Quincy is working around the clock to make it a success. The only problem is, he&’s told everyone he has a date to the ball, when in reality that couldn&’t be further from the truth. At first, Tia and Quincy don&’t see eye to eye, until they realise they both have something to gain by pretending to be a couple. But when a snowstorm threatens to cancel the Winter Ball, their fake relationship is put to the test. Will Tia and Quincy be able to keep up the pretence and save the day, or will real feelings get in the way? PRAISE FOR ABIOLA BELLO'S LOVE IN WINTER WONDERLAND: &‘A screen-worthy holiday romance.&’ Joya Goffney, author of Excuse Me While I Ugly Cry &‘Gorgeous writing, witty dialogue, a magical setting and two characters you'll fall head over heels for.&’ Jennifer Niven, author of All the Bright Places &‘I devoured this delicious YA rom-com. A treat to read any time of year.&’ Katherine Webber, author of Twin Crowns &‘A wonderfully warm love story.&’ Candice Brathwaite, author of Cuts Both Ways &‘A warm and cosy read that pulls you into the perfect winter romance. Abiola has given us all a gift to swoon over.&’ Benjamin Dean, author of The King is Dead
The Only Gaijin in the Village: A Year Living in Rural Japan
by Iain MaloneyIn 2016 Scottish writer Iain Maloney and his Japanese wife Minori moved to a village in rural Japan. This is the story of his attempt to fit in, be accepted and fulfil his duties as a member of the community, despite being the only foreigner in the village. Even after more than a decade living in Japan and learning the language, life in the countryside was a culture shock. Due to increasing numbers of young people moving to the cities in search of work, there are fewer rural residents under the retirement age – and they have two things in abundance: time and curiosity. Iain’s attempts at amateur farming, basic gardening and DIY are conducted under the watchful eye of his neighbours and wife. But curtain twitching is the least of his problems. The threat of potential missile strikes and earthquakes is nothing compared to the venomous snakes, terrifying centipedes and bees the size of small birds that stalk Iain’s garden. Told with self-deprecating humour, this memoir gives a fascinating insight into a side of Japan rarely seen and affirms the positive benefits of immigration for the individual and the community. It’s not always easy being the only gaijin in the village.
The Only Game in Town
by Lacie Waldon'A swoonworthy romance that left me grinning for days' Angie HockmanOne small town, one big prize, one handsome stranger...Nothing ever changes in Redford, Georgia. That's what freelance editor Jess Reid loves about her hometown-and part of what keeps her from leaving. Content taking care of her father, a car mechanic who singlehandedly raised her after her mom skipped out, Jess is resigned to a safe, unremarkable existence...until Jasper Wilhelm, the town's eccentric benefactor, dies suddenly and leaves behind the opportunity of a lifetime.Financial advisor Carter Barclay has been too busy to visit his grandfather in Redford, but he's heard countless stories about the town and its zany residents from Jasper. A small, insular town in Georgia is the last place Carter expects to be spending his summer-but it seems his grandfather had one final trick up his sleeve. At the funeral, it's revealed that Jasper has devised a massive, high-stakes game for the people of Redford, with the winning duo taking home his entire fortune. The catch? He's already taken the liberty of pairing them up. As tensions of all kinds rise between Jess and Carter, and the life-changing prize looms closer, the two must decide what they're willing to risk to change their lives. A love story full of spirit and hijinks, The Only Game in Town is a funny, quirky homage to the people we get to call home.An unforgettable and heartfelt romantic comedy from the author of The Layover.Why readers love Lacie Waldon . . .'Delicious, slow-burning romance, sizzling banter and crackling chemistry? Swoon' Angie Hockman, author of Shipped'A super fun, witty, and romantic enemies-to-lovers rom-com that had me flying through the pages. A lovely escape full of sun, swoons, and sexual tension' Kerry Winfrey, author of Waiting for Tom Hanks'A highly recommended read for fans of enemies-to-lovers and anyone who feels the pull of wanderlust' Sarah Hogle, author of You Deserve Each Other'Witty banter, sizzling chemistry, and perfect pacing had me flying through The Layover. A must read for rom-com fans!' Samantha Young, author of Fight or Flight'The Layover is an ideal escape - a fun and irresistible romance that soars' Libby Hubscher, author of Meet Me in Paradise
The Only Girl in School (Scholastic Press Novels)
by Natalie StandifordShe's the only one who knows what it's like to be the only one.When Claire's best friend, Bess, moves away, she becomes the only girl left in her entire school. At first, she thinks she'll be able to deal with this -- after all, the girls' bathroom is now completely hers, so she can turn it into her own private headquarters and draw on the walls. When it comes to soccer games or sailing races, she can face off against any boy. The problem is that her other best friend, Henry, has begun to ignore her. And Webby, a super-annoying bully, won't leave her alone. And Yucky Gilbert, the boy who has a crush on her, also won't leave her alone.It's never easy being the only one -- and over the course of a wacky school year, Claire is going to have to make it through challenges big and small. The boys may think they rule the school, but when it comes to thinking on your feet, Claire's got them outnumbered.
Only Human
by Tom Holt'When Tom Holt's on form, the world seems a much cheerier place' - SFX'...both intimate and ambitious - not only human, but also divine' - DAILY TELEGRAPHSomething is about to go wrong. Very wrong. What do you expect if the Supreme Being decides to get away from it all for a few days, leaving his naturally inquisitive son to look after the cosmic balance of things?A minor hiccup with a human soul and a welding machine soon leads to a violent belch, and before you know it the human condition - not to mention the lemming condition - is tumbling down the slippery slope to chaos.A dazzling comic fantasy novel from one of Britain's sharpest, funniest writers.Books by Tom Holt:Walled Orchard SeriesGoatsongThe Walled OrchardJ.W. Wells & Co. SeriesThe Portable DoorIn Your DreamsEarth, Air, Fire and CustardYou Don't Have to Be Evil to Work Here, But It HelpsThe Better MousetrapMay Contain Traces of MagicLife, Liberty and the Pursuit of SausagesYouSpace SeriesDoughnutWhen It's A JarThe Outsorcerer's ApprenticeThe Good, the Bad and the SmugNovelsExpecting Someone TallerWho's Afraid of BeowulfFlying DutchYe Gods!OvertimeHere Comes the SunGrailblazersFaust Among EqualsOdds and GodsDjinn RummyMy HeroPaint your DragonOpen SesameWish you Were HereAlexander at World's EndOnly HumanSnow White and the Seven SamuraiOlympiadValhallaNothing But Blue SkiesFalling SidewaysLittle PeopleSong for NeroMeadowlandBarkingBlonde BombshellThe Management Style of the Supreme BeingsAn Orc on the Wild Side
Only Human
by Tom Holt'When Tom Holt's on form, the world seems a much cheerier place' - SFX'...both intimate and ambitious - not only human, but also divine' - DAILY TELEGRAPHSomething is about to go wrong. Very wrong. What do you expect if the Supreme Being decides to get away from it all for a few days, leaving his naturally inquisitive son to look after the cosmic balance of things?A minor hiccup with a human soul and a welding machine soon leads to a violent belch, and before you know it the human condition - not to mention the lemming condition - is tumbling down the slippery slope to chaos.A dazzling comic fantasy novel from one of Britain's sharpest, funniest writers.Books by Tom Holt:Walled Orchard SeriesGoatsongThe Walled OrchardJ.W. Wells & Co. SeriesThe Portable DoorIn Your DreamsEarth, Air, Fire and CustardYou Don't Have to Be Evil to Work Here, But It HelpsThe Better MousetrapMay Contain Traces of MagicLife, Liberty and the Pursuit of SausagesYouSpace SeriesDoughnutWhen It's A JarThe Outsorcerer's ApprenticeThe Good, the Bad and the SmugNovelsExpecting Someone TallerWho's Afraid of BeowulfFlying DutchYe Gods!OvertimeHere Comes the SunGrailblazersFaust Among EqualsOdds and GodsDjinn RummyMy HeroPaint your DragonOpen SesameWish you Were HereAlexander at World's EndOnly HumanSnow White and the Seven SamuraiOlympiadValhallaNothing But Blue SkiesFalling SidewaysLittle PeopleSong for NeroMeadowlandBarkingBlonde BombshellThe Management Style of the Supreme BeingsAn Orc on the Wild Side
Only in Your Dreams: A Novel (Oakwood Bay #1)
by Ellie K WildeA spicy small-town, brother&’s best friend, sports romance &“packed with sizzling tension, heat, and sweet, swoon-worthy moments&” (Peyton Corinne, author of TikTok sensation Unsteady) between a college football coach and the one that got away that you&’ll want to devour in one sitting. If he can prove he loved her then, and he loves her still, this time might be different.Ten years after one of the most heartbreaking nights of her life, Melody Woods is back in her small hometown of Oakwood Bay, broke, jaded, and unceremoniously dumped by her big-city boyfriend. To top it all off, her twin brother, Parker, is pushing her to take his spot on a camping trip with the one guy she&’s spent a decade avoiding.For college football coach Zac Porter, his best friend&’s twin sister, Melody, has always been off-limits. And after fumbling his chance ten years ago, a devastated Zac was sure he&’d lost Melody for good. So, when Melody shows up at the campsite instead of Parker, Zac realizes that now is the time to prove to her that they were always meant to be, no matter how long it takes to make up for his teenage self&’s mistake.Reeling from the truth of her last relationship, Melody plans to stay in town just long enough to get back on her feet. Then, she&’s gone again. Meanwhile, Zac is facing an uphill battle to coach his team to its first winning game in years, to show Melody how she deserves to be loved, and to keep Parker from ever finding out. Maybe then, being with her will be more than just a dream.
Only in Your Dreams: A Novel (Oakwood Bay #1)
by Ellie K WildeA spicy small-town, brother&’s best friend, sports romance &“packed with sizzling tension, heat, and sweet, swoon-worthy moments&” (Peyton Corinne, author of TikTok sensation Unsteady) between a college football coach and the one that got away that you&’ll want to devour in one sitting.If he can prove he loved her then, and he loves her still, this time might be different. Ten years after one of the most heartbreaking nights of her life, Melody Woods is back in her small hometown of Oakwood Bay, broke, jaded, and unceremoniously dumped by her big-city boyfriend. To top it all off, her twin brother, Parker, is pushing her to take his spot on a camping trip with the one guy she&’s spent a decade avoiding. For college football coach Zac Porter, his best friend&’s twin sister, Melody, has always been off-limits. And after fumbling his chance ten years ago, a devastated Zac was sure he&’d lost Melody for good. So, when Melody shows up at the campsite instead of Parker, Zac realizes that now is the time to prove to her that they were always meant to be, no matter how long it takes to make up for his teenage self&’s mistake. Reeling from the truth of her last relationship, Melody plans to stay in town just long enough to get back on her feet. Then, she&’s gone again. Meanwhile, Zac is facing an uphill battle to coach his team to its first winning game in years, to show Melody how she deserves to be loved, and to keep Parker from ever finding out. Maybe then, being with her will be more than just a dream.
Only Joking: What's So Funny About Making People Laugh?
by Jimmy Carr Lucy GreevesBritain's hottest young comedian presents a seriously funny, up-close look at joking matters'from the social origins of laughter, to the art and craft of humor, to why we can never remember the punch line'featuring over 300 jokes. As the host of the hit game show "Distraction" (now in its third season on Comedy Central) and one of the premier stand-up acts working today, award-winning comedian Jimmy Carr has won over millions of fans around the world with his trademark rapier wit, laced with ?exquisitely economical and perfectly timed one-liners? ("The Guardian"). For this book he teams up with friend and fellow comedy writer Lucy Greeves to take an in-depth look at where humor comes from and how it works, through exploring its purest form: the joke. "Only Joking" begins with the mechanism of laughter'how it happens and why even infants do it'then delves into the power of the punch line, exploring the basics of all jokes, from the use of shock and surprise to advanced stand-up techniques such as the ?pull-back/reveal. ' Carr and Greeves go on to explore taboo humor, jokes that bomb, and the psychology of finding something funny. They look into the long-standing connection between politics and humor, and discuss the survival prospects for contentious jokes in the current political climate. Throughout the book they conjure up a supporting cast of colorful joke enthusiasts, from Sigmund Freud to Lenny Bruce, and discuss their influence on the jokes we tell today. Surveying across national, ethnic, and gender divides, this rollicking analysis of why joking will always be close to the human heart is an irresistible exploration of humor that makes clear why we need a good laugh nowmore than ever.
The Only King to Claim Her: An Uplifting International Romance (The Kings of California #4)
by Millie AdamsAn innocent royal will test her billionaire husband&’s limits in this powerful story by Millie Adams!A king in name only Until he claims his queen… Finally freed from her captors, new queen Annick faces her looming coronation. She knows there are still those looking to destroy her, so she needs help—fast. Turning to dark-hearted Maximus King is the answer, but Annick is shocked when he proposes a much more permanent solution: marriage! Maximus is her adviser, protector—and now her king. He introduces innocent Annick to all of life&’s delights, except one… Then their electric wedding night leaves her transformed and fighting to claim a passion—and a future—she's only dreamed of!From Harlequin Presents: Escape to exotic locations where passion knows no bounds. Read all The Kings of California books:Book 1: Stealing the Promised PrincessBook 2: Crowning His Innocent AssistantBook 3: The Only King to Claim Her
Only Lover: A Blackmail Romance
by Carole MortimerRead this classic romance by USA Today bestselling author Carole Mortimer, now available for the first time in e-book!A deal for a mistress…Farrah knows her father's career will be ruined unless she intervenes—and quickly! One simple, human error shouldn't be held against him and she's sure his employer, darkly handsome and dynamic Joel Falcone, will understand… But Joel's hard-headed response shocks her—as does the powerful attraction between them!—and she's uneasy at the cold calculation behind his offer. Yet with no other choice, Farrah must take his deal… Joel will help Farrah, on one condition: she must pretend to be his mistress! Originally published in 1979
Only Mostly Devastated: A Novel
by Sophie GonzalesOllie and Will were a summer fling; now they're classmates. But only one of them is out...SIMON VS THE HOMO SAPIENS AGENDA meets a modern-day, queer re-imagining of GREASE.It was the very last Wednesday of August when I realized Disney had been lying to me about Happily Ever Afters. Because, you see, I was four days into mine, and my prince was nowhere to be found. "Please don't lose contact. I need to see you again," he'd said. So why was I here, banging my head against a metaphorical wall, weighing up the pros and cons of sending another message? This wasn't a big deal. It was just a guy texting another guy. A guy who knew all my biggest secrets, and had Seen. Me. Naked™. A guy who'd convinced me he really, really liked me. A guy who'd better have been abducted by goddamn aliens...When Ollie meets Will over the summer break, he thinks he's found his Happily Ever After. But once summer's ended, Will stops texting him back, and Ollie finds himself short of his fairy-tale ending.A family emergency sees Ollie uprooted and enrolled at a new school across the country - Will's school - and Ollie finds that the sweet, affectionate and comfortably queer guy he knew from summer isn't the same one attending Collinswood High. This Will is a class clown, a basketball jock and, well, a bit of a jerk.Ollie isn't going to pine after a guy who isn't ready for a relationship. But as school life repeatedly throws them together, from music class to the lunch table, Ollie finds his resolve weakening.With the noisy drama of their friends as the backdrop - from ambitious Juliette and frosty Lara, to big-hearted Darnell and king-jock Matt - Ollie has a decision to make.The last time he gave Will his heart, Will handed it back to him trampled and battered. Ollie would have to be an idiot to trust him with it again. Right? *Don't miss the new queer YA rom-com from Sophie Gonzales - PERFECT ON PAPER is out in March 2021!*
Only Mostly Devastated
by Sophie GonzalesOllie and Will were a summer fling; now they're classmates. But only one of them is out...SIMON VS THE HOMO SAPIENS AGENDA meets a modern-day, queer re-imagining of GREASE.It was the very last Wednesday of August when I realized Disney had been lying to me about Happily Ever Afters. Because, you see, I was four days into mine, and my prince was nowhere to be found. "Please don't lose contact. I need to see you again," he'd said. So why was I here, banging my head against a metaphorical wall, weighing up the pros and cons of sending another message? This wasn't a big deal. It was just a guy texting another guy. A guy who knew all my biggest secrets, and had Seen. Me. Naked™. A guy who'd convinced me he really, really liked me. A guy who'd better have been abducted by goddamn aliens...When Ollie meets Will over the summer break, he thinks he's found his Happily Ever After. But once summer's ended, Will stops texting him back, and Ollie finds himself short of his fairy-tale ending.A family emergency sees Ollie uprooted and enrolled at a new school across the country - Will's school - and Ollie finds that the sweet, affectionate and comfortably queer guy he knew from summer isn't the same one attending Collinswood High. This Will is a class clown, a basketball jock and, well, a bit of a jerk.Ollie isn't going to pine after a guy who isn't ready for a relationship. But as school life repeatedly throws them together, from music class to the lunch table, Ollie finds his resolve weakening.With the noisy drama of their friends as the backdrop - from ambitious Juliette and frosty Lara, to big-hearted Darnell and king-jock Matt - Ollie has a decision to make.The last time he gave Will his heart, Will handed it back to him trampled and battered. Ollie would have to be an idiot to trust him with it again. Right?(P)2020 Macmillan Audio