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The Real Mrs. Brown: The Authorised Biography of Brendan O'Carroll
by Brian BeacomWho'd have thought a potty-mouthed Dublin mammy with a cream cardigan and elasticated tan tights could storm British TV screens and leave a nation helpless with laughter? Brendan O'Carroll performs to tens of thousands of people a night in packed-out stadiums across the country. In the last four years his TV show has become a number 1 ratings success and he's even making a movie. But Brendan has had to battle hard for success. The youngest of eleven children, his mother was Maureen O'Carroll, a former nun who went on to become the first woman to be elected to the Irish parliament. Brendan adored his strong, widowed mother - and she later became the inspiration for his indomitable character Agnes Brown. However, the family endured poverty reminiscent of Angela's Ashes and Brendan saw no option but to leave school at 12 to work. He married young and for decades struggled to make ends meet. Eventually, bankrupt and desperate, Brendan went to see a fortune teller who told him she could see his future achieving worldwide success as a comedian and actor. At first Brendan laughed at the notion, but then he thought of how much his friends loved his gags, and decided to give it a go... This is the magical story of how a loveable Irishman with a wig and a wit as caustic as battery acid surprised everyone - most of all himself - by becoming one of the best-loved comedians in the world. It is a story of hardship, heartbreak, and talent and will remind readers afresh that sometimes the facts can be even more extraordinary than the fiction.
The Real Mrs. Brown: The Authorised Biography of Brendan O'Carroll
by Brian BeacomWho'd have thought a potty-mouthed Dublin mammy with a cream cardigan and elasticated tan tights could storm British TV screens and leave a nation helpless with laughter? Brendan O'Carroll performs to tens of thousands of people a night in packed-out stadiums across the country. In the last four Mrs Brown's Boys has become a number 1 ratings success and he's even making a movie. But Brendan has had to battle hard for success. The youngest of eleven children, his mother was Maureen O'Carroll, a former nun who went on to become the first woman to be elected to the Irish parliament. Brendan adored his strong, widowed mother - and she later became the inspiration for his indomitable character Agnes Brown. However, the family endured poverty reminiscent of Angela's Ashes and Brendan saw no option but to leave school at 12 to work. He married young and for decades struggled to make ends meet. Eventually, bankrupt and desperate, Brendan went to see a fortune teller who told him she could see his future achieving worldwide success as a comedian and actor. At first Brendan laughed at the notion, but then he thought of how much his friends loved his gags, and decided to give it a go... This is the magical story of how a loveable Irishman with a wig and a wit as caustic as battery acid surprised everyone - most of all himself - by becoming one of the best-loved comedians in the world. It is a story of hardship, heartbreak, and talent and will remind readers afresh that sometimes the facts can be even more extraordinary than the fiction.
Real Pigeons Eat Danger (Real Pigeons #2)
by Andrew McDonaldIt&’s a bird! It&’s a plane! It&’s—wait, it really IS a bird! Take another look, because what looks like an ordinary pigeon might just be a hero saving your butt! The high-flying adventures continue in book 2 of this hilarious illustrated series perfect for fans of BAD GUYS and DOG MAN.What do Real Pigeons do? They EAT DANGER, of course! This squad of crime-fighting feathered friends is nonstop action and nonstop laughs. Watch them as they infiltrate a secret warehouse full of bottled birds and take down a truly criminal ostrich. The DANGER is REAL. And so are the REAL PIGEONS.
Real Pigeons Fight Crime (Real Pigeons #1)
by Andrew McDonaldIt&’s a bird! It&’s a plane! It&’s—wait, it really IS a bird! Take another look, because what looks like an ordinary pigeon might just be a hero saving your butt! Meet the crime-fighting pigeons secretly flying around chasing bad guys in this hilarious illustrated series perfect for fans of BAD GUYS and DOG MAN.What do REAL PIGEONS do? They fight crime, of course! Wait, what? You didn't know your town is protected by a secret squad of crime-fighting feathered friends? Well, you are about to get schooled. REAL PIGEONS solve mysteries! REAL PIGEONS fight bad guys! And REAL PIGEONS won't stop until your neighborhood is safe and the questions are all answered: Like, why have all the breadcrumbs disappeared? And which food truck smells the best?
Real Pigeons Nest Hard (Real Pigeons #3)
by Andrew McDonaldIt&’s a bird! It&’s a plane! It&’s—wait, it really IS a bird! Take another look, because what looks like an ordinary pigeon might just be a hero saving your butt! The crime-fighting adventures continue in book 3 of this hilarious illustrated series perfect for fans of BAD GUYS and DOG MAN.What do REAL PIGEONS do? They nest, of course! And when they nest, they nest HARD. Protecting their city from crime is tiring work after all! But the squad can't rest yet, not with a bone-crunching vulure on the loose, a wild child running amok, and a long-lost family to find! Will the REAL PIGEONS ever find the perfect nest to take the perfect nap?
Real Pigeons Peck Punches (Real Pigeons #5)
by Andrew McDonaldIt's a bird! It's... another bird? Well, actually it's a whole flock of crime-fighting pigeons! The hilarity continues in this reluctant-reader favorite, perfect for fans of BAD GUYS and DOG MAN.With the Real Pigeons World Wild Network, more pigeons are fighting crime than ever before! But that doesn't mean the squad can rest. There are still thieves to catch and endangered birds to protect! But what will the Real Pigeons do when they find a traitor in their own nest?!
Real Pigeons Splash Back (Real Pigeons #4)
by Andrew McDonaldIt&’s a bird! It&’s a plane! It&’s—wait, it really IS a bird! Take another look, because what looks like an ordinary pigeon might just be a hero saving your butt! Don't miss this hilarious illustrated series perfect for fans of DOG MAN.The REAL PIGEONS are ready for anything. A MONSTER who is draining every bath in the city? A breeze! A PRANKSTER causing trouble in a beach town? Psh! A shadowy BAD GUY who wants to take over the world? Not a problem...right? No one can protect a city like this team of crime-fighting heroes. But who will protect the Real Pigeons when they don't even know how to SWIM? This isn't the REAL PIGEONS' first time fighting crime! Start here, but don't forget to read about their other adventures in REAL PIGEONS FIGHT CRIME, REAL PIGEONS EAT DANGER, and REAL PIGEONS NEST HARD.
Real Ponies Don't Go Oink!
by Patrick F. McManusA collection of humorous essays on bobcat encounters, birding, and other outdoorsmen misadventures from the Outdoor Life columnist hailed as “a treasure” (The Atlantic).“Bestselling outdoor humorist McManus bags another in this collection of yarns featuring irascible woodsman Rancid Crabtree, ‘Phantom of the Woods’ Retch Sweeney, boyhood pal Crazy Eddie, and others of McManus’s acquaintance. Also meet hunting dog Strange, dog delinquent, whose prey of choice is year-old roadkill. Readers of McManus’s humor column in Outdoor Life will enjoy his observations on the joys of pig-back riding, workshop puttering, and Sasquatch ducking. So will those who, like McManus’s wife Bun, appreciate nature most from the window of a seven-story luxury hotel.” —Library Journal“McManus is a brilliant humorist, particularly in describing human reactions to the unexpected . . . Certain pieces will appeal only to hunters and anglers, but other entries are so notable that the book deserves a wide audience.” —Publishers WeeklyPraise for Patrick F. McManus“Everybody should read Patrick McManus.” —The New York Times Book Review“A style that brings to mind Mark Twain, Art Buchwald, and Garrison Keillor.” —People“Describing Patrick F. McManus as an outdoor humorist is like saying Mark Twain wrote books about small boys . . . the funniest writer around today—indoors or outdoors.” —The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
The Real Riley Mayes
by Rachel ElliottFunny and full of heart, this debut graphic novel is a story about friendship, identity, and embracing all the parts of yourself that make you special. Fifth grade is just not Riley’s vibe. Everyone else is squaded up—except Riley. Her best friend moved away. All she wants to do is draw, and her grades show it.One thing that makes her happy is her favorite comedian, Joy Powers. Riley loves to watch her old shows and has memorized her best jokes. So when the class is assigned to write letters to people they admire, of course Riley’s picking Joy Powers!Things start to look up when a classmate, Cate, offers to help Riley with the letter, and a new kid, Aaron, actually seems to get her weird sense of humor. But when mean girl Whitney spreads a rumor about her, things begin to click into place for Riley. Her curiosity about Aaron’s two dads and her celebrity crush on Joy Powers suddenly make more sense.Readers will respond to Riley’s journey of self-discovery and will recognize themselves in this character who is less than perfect but trying her best. And creative kids will recognize themselves in her love of art and drawing.While often funny and light, Riley’s exploration of what it feels to be an outsider and how hard it can be to make a friend break your heart in the best way. And with all of Riley’s hijinks and missteps, this story is laugh-out-loud funny from start to finish.
The Real Rio D'Aquila (Orsini Brides #2)
by Sandra MartonItalian by birth, this street urchin lived a life of extreme poverty until he escaped to Brazil-where he cast off his roots, took a new name and pulled himself up from the streets.Now Rio D'Aquila is beyond wealthy, with a reputation for being uncompromising in business...and incomparable in bed! But on meeting vulnerable Isabella Orsini, he feels something deep within him stir, and he finds himself pretending to be that long-forgotten man.Passion flares and their affair spirals, but Isabella still doesn't know that her lover has lied to her. Who is the real Rio D'Aquila?
The Real Thing: A Novel
by Cassie MaeIn this electrifying novel from Cassie Mae, two close friends surprise themselves by shifting from platonic love to sexual attraction. Eric Matua has one friend--his best friend and childhood sweetheart, who needs a place to stay for the summer. Mia Johnson has thousands of friends--who live in her computer. Along with her email chats and Facebook notifications, Mia also devours romance novels, spending countless hours with fictional characters, dreaming of her own Romeo to sweep her off her feet. When she starts receiving supersweet messages from a stranger who thinks she's someone else, Mia begins to believe that real love is possible outside her virtual world. When the two friends become roommates, Mia finds herself falling harder than she ever thought she could. But Eric keeps his desires locked away, unsure of himself and his ability to give his best friend what she deserves in a boyfriend. As her advances are continually spurned, Mia splits her time between Eric and her computer. But she soon realizes she's about to lose the only real thing she's ever had.
Real Ultimate Power: The Official Ninja Book
by Robert HamburgerDear Stupid Idiots, A lot of you have been saying that I don't know anything about REAL ninjas. But that's a bunch of bull crap! You dummies don't know anything. And maybe YOU should get a life. I bet a lot of you have never even seen a girl naked! You idiots believe that ninjas had some "code of honor." Yeah right! If by "code of honor," you mean "code to flip out and go nuts for absolutely no reason at all even if it means that people might think you are totally insane or sweet," then you are right. But if you mean a "code to be nice and speak nicely while sharing and not cutting off heads," then you're the biggest idiot ever!!!!!! So if you have any brains, you will shut up and get a life. So go shut up, you stupid idiot. No thank you, Robert Hamburger
Real Vintage Maverick (Montana Mavericks: Back in the Saddle #3)
by Marie FerrarellaThunder Canyon NuggetFound: One genuine cowboy, in need of a cowgirl!Folks in Thunder Canyon all remember the broad-shouldered, blond cowpoke with the green eyes and somber expression. We haven't seen Cody Overton smile much in the years since he lost his wife.But there's been a strange discovery inside Catherine Clifton's new secondhand boutique, Real Vintage Cowboy. Rumor has it that the eldest Clifton sister has found Cody Overton's heart! Is it true that cutie Catherine has put the spring back in Cody's boot-scootin' step? Stay tuned, smart shoppers, and find out whether Catherine and Cody can seal the deal-and what other surprises the sassy shopkeeper might have in store!
Realidad a la piedra
by Joaquín Reyes CanoRealidad a la piedra es el nuevo y desternillante libro de Joaquín Reyes. «Realidad a la piedra es un libro protagonizado por piedras. Pero a pesar de ser todas ellas duras, compactas, firmes, constantes también tienen sentimientos y se enamoran y sufren y tienen anhelos y sienten envidia. Y ahora os dejo que me estoy haciendo las ingles brasileñas.»Joaquín Reyes Piedras célebres que se hacen fotos con guijarros desconocidos, primos que se sacan oposiciones como piedras -mecheros, piedras exorcistas, piedras fotogénicas, piedras cotillas, piedras preciosas, preciosas Piedras, en definitiva, que tienen su corazoncito.
Reality: The Novel
by Jeff HavensTrent Tucker, the protagonist of this hilarious satire, hates reality TV. Unfortunately, his job at Nova Consulting involves the creation of new reality shows that are even more outrageous and excessive than those now on television.Surrounded by colleagues who could easily be characters in the own reality show—dumb blonde, angry black man, flamboyant homosexual, frosty bitch, fast-talking Sicilian and their megalomaniacal boss, P.T. Beauregard—Trent's immersion is complete.The characters in Reality: the novel, behave a lot like their television counterparts as they bicker with each other incessantly, backstab their co-workers, find themselves on a deserted island and become involved in a murder plot—all good, clean fun that mimics the fantasy lives they feverishly try to create for their anxious network clients.
Reality: And Other Stories
by John LanchesterA Kirkus Reviews Best Short Fiction of 2021 Selection Ghost stories for the digital age by the Booker Prize–longlisted author of The Wall.In 2017, inspired in part by Henry James’ The Turn of the Screw, the acclaimed English novelist John Lanchester published a ghost story in The New Yorker. "Signal," an eerie story of contemporary life and the perils of technology, was a sensation among readers—and since then Lanchester has written several more.Reality and Other Stories gathers the best of these, taking readers to an uncanny world familiar to fans of The Twilight Zone or Black Mirror. Household gizmos with a mind of their own. Mysterious cell-phone calls from unknown numbers. Reality TV shows and the creeping suspicion that none of this is real…Reality and Other Stories is a book of disquiet that captures the severe disconnection and distraction of our time.
Reality by Other Means: The Best Short Fiction of James Morrow
by James MorrowThis short story anthology by the author of The Godhead Trilogy “reveals him to be one of the wittiest writers of contemporary speculative fiction” (Publishers Weekly, starred review).Join the Abominable Snowman as, determined to transcend his cannibalistic past, he studies Tibetan Buddhism under the Dalai Lama. Pace the walls of Ilium with fair Helen as she tries to convince both sides to abandon their absurd Trojan War. Visit the nursery of Zenobia Garber, born to a Pennsylvania farm couple who accept her for the uncanny little biosphere she is. Scramble aboard the raft built by the passengers and crew of the sinking Titanic—and don’t be surprised when the vessel transmutes into a world even more astonishing than the original Ship of Dreams. Reality by Other Means offers readers the most celebrated results from James Morrow’s decades-long career designing fictive thought experiments. Anchored by seven previously uncollected stories, this omnibus ranges from social satire to theological hijinks, steampunk escapades to philosophical antics.
Reality (Can Be Okay, but Mostly It) Bites: Original aphorisms and other philosophical fragments with teeth
by Gordon HutchisonEveryone knows reality can really bite. Now you can bite back with this original collection of 400 aphorisms, laugh-out-loud one-liners, and other intellectually and linguistically titillating nuggets that zero in on homo sapiens being himself in politics, sex, love, marriage, family, economics, youth, old age, and more. From thought-provoking to downright irreverent, these seductive verbal twists and turns offer insights, entertainment, and, if you're frustrated with the mess the world is in, the comfort of knowing you're not alone. So if you need help connecting with an audience, sounding smarter to your friends, or just making it through another day, this is a resource you can really sink your teeth into
Reality Check
by A.M. GoldsherBad-gal singer Jenn Bradford is living the dream. But when her latest album gets distinctly un-dreamy reviews she comes down to earth with a crash. Jenn desperately needs a muse to get her music back on track. But who's going to inspire her? Elliot, the music journo who's tailing her around town? Kevin, her no-good but so good-looking ex? Surely not her boringly clean-cut and conservative neighbour Porter! He doesn't dig music - at least not Jenn's kind. But is it possible that he might just dig Jenn...?
The Reality Shows
by Ann Pellegrini Karen Finley Kathleen Hanna"Ms. Finley hasn't lost the power to disturb."-Ben Brantley, The New York TimesNo other contemporary performing artist has captured the psychological complexity of this decade's political and social milestones as Karen Finley has in the past ten years. In her inimitable style, Finley has embodied some of the most troubling figures to cast a long shadow on the public imagination, and has envisioned a kind of catharsis within each drama: Liza Minnelli responds to the September 11 attacks; Terri Schaivo explains why Americans love a woman in a coma; Martha Stewart dumps George W. Bush during their tryst on the eve of the Republican National Convention; Silda Spitzer tells the former governor why "I'm sorry" just isn't enough; Jackie O cries, "Please stop looking at me!"The Reality Shows is a revelation of a decade by one of our greatest interpreters of popular and political culture.Karen Finley's raw and transgressive performances have long provoked controversy and debate. She has appeared and exhibited her visual art, performances, and plays internationally. The author of many books, including A Different Kind Of Intimacy, George & Martha, and Shock Treatment, she is a professor at the Tisch School of Art and Public Policy at NYU.Kathleen Hanna, activist and writer, was the lead singer of the punk band Bikini Kill before fronting the dance-punk band Le Tigre. She released a solo album under the name Julie Ruin.
Reality Wedding (Reality Star #3)
by Laura Heffernan<p>SAY ‘I DO’—OR ELSE When Jen Reid escaped a reality TV cruise with her relationship intact—if not her hair—she swore she was done with the cameras for good. <p>Sure, she and Justin met, had their first kiss, and got engaged with tape rolling, but manufactured drama and ruthless producers have shaken them up more times than she can count. <p>With Jen’s reality-themed bakery just getting started and her brand-new lawyer fiancé in a pile of debt, they’re a long way from glitz and glamour, and that’s fine by Jen. <p>Until the Network calls and tells her that unless she says “I do” to a wedding special, Justin will be out of a job. <p>Now Jen has two weeks to plan an all-expenses-paid “dream wedding”—and dodge the tricks and traps of a showrunner happy to mess up her future in the name of ratings. Luckily for Jen, she’s got plenty of experience with cake and popcorn. But when real-life drama and reality TV twists collide, the cliffhangers may just follow her right down the aisle . . .
Really?: The World According To Clarkson
by Jeremy ClarksonJEREMY CLARKSON'S LATEST - AND MOST OUTRAGEOUS - TAKE ON THE WORLDCLARKSON'S BACK - AND THIS TIME HE'S PUTTING HIS FOOT DOWNFrom his first job as a travelling sales rep selling Paddington Bears to his latest wheeze as a gentleman farmer, Jeremy Clarkson's love of cars has just about kept him out of trouble.But in a persistently infuriating world, sometimes you have to race full-throttle at the speed-bumps.Because there's still plenty to get cross about, including:· Why nothing good ever came out of a meeting· Muesli's unmentionable side effects · Navigating London when every single road is being dug up at once· People who read online reviews of dishwashers· ****ing driverless carsBuckle up for a bumpy ride - you're holding the only book in history to require seatbelts . . .Praise for Jeremy Clarkson: Brilliant . . . Laugh-out-loud' Daily Telegraph'Outrageously funny . . . Will have you in stitches' Time Out 'Very funny . . . I cracked up laughing on the tube' Evening Standard
Really Bad Dad Jokes: More Than 400 Unbearable Groan-Inducing Wisecracks Sure to Make You the Funniest Father With a Quip
by Joe Kerz<p>Bring out the groans with Really Bad Dad Jokes! <p>Do you enjoy making puns about the most random things you can think of? Do you enjoy inducing embarrassment and eye-rolling from your family? Do you often crack yourself up with your own jokes? Then Really Bad Dad Jokes is for you! <p>In this follow-up to Dad Jokes, you’ll find a multitude of the ultimate dad jokes, such as: <p> <li>If prisoners could take their own mug shots, would they be called cellfies? <li>Dogs can’t operate MRI machines. . . but catscan! <li>What did one plate say to the other? “Lunch is on me!” <li>What does a martial arts expert drink? Kara-tea. And many, many more! <p> <p>With over 400 unbearably funny puns, quips, and one-liners, Really Bad Dad Jokes is your secret to mastering one of the most groanworthy arts of being a dad.</p>
Really Cute People
by Markus Harwood-JonesA little domestic bliss never hurt anyone…right? Charlie Dee is headed for burnout. They&’ve been burned before, both by their bio family and the now-defunct queer collective they once called home. So when they&’re asked to take a work trip outside the city, they jump at the chance. Sure, it&’s additional work with no additional pay, but it&’s also an excuse to get out of town—and out of their own head.That dream is shattered when Charlie opens the door to their supposedly private rental. There&’s a bird on the loose, circling the living room as it&’s chased by a cat, who is chased by a small child. The girl&’s parents, Hayden and Buffy, only manage to add to the chaos. They promise to leave first thing in the morning, but when a massive snowstorm rolls in, this overnight trip becomes a weeklong affair.Reluctantly charmed by this unfiltered—if forced—look at a loving, healthy family, Charlie begins to develop feelings for both Hayden and Buffy. And they both seem to be flirting back. But when a potential promotion lures Charlie back to the city, all three will have to decide where they go from here—and what it means to truly feel at home.
The Really Dead Wives of New Jersey: A Novel
by Astrid DahlA propulsive page-turning thriller following the hit reality TV show Garden State Goddesses where secrets are uncovered, intense rivalries surface, and a startling murder propels a producer on a riveting quest for the truth.On this season of Garden State Goddesses: Getting canceled means getting killed.When Hope Bennett marries Carmela&’s brother, Leo, she becomes not only a Fontana, but a Garden State Goddess—and not everyone is happy. Secrets will be revealed, decades-long rivalries will surface, and a sudden murder will lead to a reality reckoning no one is prepared for—least of all the show&’s producer, Eden, who must race to catch a killer and save the most dramatic season of all time.&“Juicy, gossipy, and deliciously vicious, one thing is certain: this New Jersey neighborhood has enough secrets to guarantee renewal. Readers will be clamoring for season two of this funny, dark guilty pleasure.&” —KATY HAYS, New York Times bestselling author of The Cloisters &“Like the best, most addictive reality TV, The Really Dead Wives of New Jersey is about people behaving badly—lying, cheating, back-stabbing, and worse. I started reading for all the juicy drama, but it was the murder mystery that had me racing through pages at the end.&” —ANA REYES, New York Times bestselling author of The House in the Pines &“Secrets, gallows humor, campy reality TV stars, and an Instagram gossip account called Shady Di—Astrid Dahl&’s The Really Dead Wives of New Jersey is the kind of book I wanted to live inside. LOLing and gasping my way through, I nearly wished I&’d written it myself!&” —ANNA DORN, author of Perfume & Pain