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The Disastrous Little Dragon: Book 2 (Monster Hospital #2)
by Gillian JohnsonBartholomew the dragon is brought to Monster Hospital by his fierce aunty Madge. He's got a terrible case of smoke inhalation because he can't breathe fire -- and he can't fly either! Can four naughty children - Sylvie, Dylan, Carolyn and Tom - help him, without getting cooked to a crisp by terrifying Aunty Madge? Maybe they can, if there's a princess involved...This book follows the first Monster Hospital adventure: THE BIG, FAT, SMELLY OGRE and is written and illustrated by the acclaimed author illustrator of the THORA books.
The Disastrous Magical Wishes of Classroom 13 (Classroom 13 #2)
by Joelle Dreidemy Honest Lee Matthew J. GilbertFor fans of Captain Underpants or Sideways Stories from Wayside School, this new chapter book series is perfect for reluctant readers. When unlucky teacher Ms. Linda LaCrosse finds a magic lamp, she releases a genie--um, I mean, a Djinn--who agrees to grant each of her students ONE WISH!You might think this was fantastic, but it was not. It was a frightful idea! With magic wishes come hungry dinosaurs, stinky pizza, photographing paparazzi, and other huge mistakes. As the students of Classroom 13 are about to learn, you should be careful what you wish for. What would YOU do with one magic wish? The final chapter of each book encourages young readers to write their OWN chapter and send it in to the author, Honest Lee!The Disastrous Magical Wishes of Classroom 13 is the second title in a new chapter book series of hilarious stories about a very unlucky classroom. Each story is full of humor, action, and fun that will prompt hours of conversation among friends, families, and classrooms.(Psst! Hey you. Yeah, YOU! Just between us, this book also has a secret code hidden in every book that kids will have to figure out to read a chapter. Kids'll love it!) ©2017 by Hachette Book Group, Inc.
The Discerning Gentleman's Guide: A Historical Romance
by Virginia HeathDon&’t miss this witty Regency rom com from Harlequin Historical. Perfect for fans of forced proximity, enemies to lovers and opposites attract. &“Choosing a wife is not a task that should be undertaken lightly.&” Bennett Montague, sixteenth Duke of Aveley, is seeking the perfect bride. He&’s narrowed his search to five worthy &‘Potentials&’…until the arrival of his aunt&’s companion unravels his carefully laid plans. Having fought for everything she has, Amelia Mansfield is incensed by Bennett&’s wife selection methods. But as she&’s forced to spend time in his company, she begins to see another side to Bennett – and that side is infinitely more tantalising and enticing…! Previously published.
The Discovery of America by the Turks
by Jorge AmadoFor the first time in English: legendary Brazilian author Jorge Amado's spirited novella about Arab immigrants to South America—published for the centennial of Amado's birth Two Arab immigrants—"Turks" as Brazilians call them—arrive in the rough Brazilian frontier on the same ship in 1903, hoping to find a future. They rub shoulders with gunslingers and plantation owners, and also tangle with merchants, one of whom is desperate to marry off his impossible daughter. Thus ensues a farcical drama that produces, in a humorous twist, the unlikeliest of suitors in this whimsical Brazilian take on The Taming of the Shrew. .
The Discreet Charm of the Big Bad Wolf: A Detective Varg Novel (4) (Detective Varg Series #4)
by Alexander McCall SmithIn the hilarious new novel in the best-selling Detective Varg series, Ulf Varg will need to resolve both a sensitive crime and his own delicate dilemma in the hopes of preserving the peace.The Department of Sensitive Crimes is downsizing in light of a recent downturn of sensitive crime, and staff members are wondering who among them will be transferred elsewhere. As the bickering between colleagues intensifies, Ulf tries his best to stay above the fray. But when Anna, a longtime friend and coworker, appears to blame him for an old case that went sideways, it seems she may be putting her own job prospects above their friendship.In the midst of all this, Ulf embarks on an important inquiry: a man's cabin has mysteriously disappeared and Ulf is tasked with finding out what happened. How exactly does one steal a house? And, more to the point, how does one track down a stolen house? Meanwhile, a promising veterinary treatment for deafness in dogs has been announced, and Ulf&’s dog, Martin, might be the perfect patient.This latest novel is another masterful, farcical installment in the series that defines the genre that Alexander McCall Smith is singlehandedly championing: Scandi blanc.
The Discreet Charm of the Big Bad Wolf: A Detective Varg Novel (4) (Detective Varg Series #4)
by Alexander McCall SmithIn the hilarious new novel in the bestselling Detective Varg series, Ulf Varg will need to solve both a sensitive crime and his own delicate dilemma if he hopes to preserve the peace.The Department of Sensitive Crimes is downsizing in light of a recent decrease in sensitive crime, and staff members are wondering who among them will be transferred elsewhere. As the bickering among colleagues intensifies, Detective Ulf Varg tries his best to stay above the fray. But when Anna, a longtime friend and coworker, appears to blame him for an old case that went sideways, it seems she may be putting her own job prospects above their friendship.In the midst of all this, Ulf embarks on an important inquiry: a man's cabin has mysteriously disappeared, and Ulf is tasked with finding out what happened. How exactly does one steal a house? And, more to the point, how does one track down a stolen house? Meanwhile, a promising treatment for deafness in dogs has been announced, and Ulf's dog, Martin, might be the perfect patient.This latest novel is another virtuoso, farcical installment in the series that defines the genre that Alexander McCall Smith is single-handedly championing: Scandi blanc.
The Discreet Pleasures of Rejection
by Martin PageAnother mordantly hysterical tale from the author of the cult favorite How I Became Stupid A funny yet poignant tour of one young man's existential crisis, The Discreet Pleasures of Rejection is another short novel from France's Martin Page. Virgil comes home from work one day to a message on his answering machine-his girlfriend is breaking up with him. This news should be devastating, but instead it's deeply troubling, because Virgil doesn't know the woman and doesn't have any memory of being in a relationship with her. The event sends Virgile into a tailspin of unrelenting self-analysis, causing him to question his memory, his sanity, even his worth as a lover. The seamless translation by Bruce Benderson perfectly captures Page's delicate, witty style, bringing this audacious gem of a novel to English-speaking audiences. .
The Disgraced Playboy (The Notorious Wolfes #7)
by Caitlin CrewsLucas... Playboy. Rebel. Rogue.No one denies Lucas anything. Women fall at his feet and into his bed at the click of his fingers. His life is charmed, reckless and carefree-he is definitely a bad boy.Grace Carter knows uncontrollable Lucas could ruin her career, and she won't tolerate his wayward behavior, despite their chemistry. But working with Lucas is thrilling, and after just a small dose of his magic, even Grace's prim-and-proper shell begins to splinter...
The Disobedient Bride (Wedlocked! #2463)
by Helen BianchinTwelve months ago their marriage was perfect...Then billionaire Tyler Benedict returns home to find his bed empty and Lianne, his wife, gone!Now Tyler will do anything to get his bride back!Tyler hires Lianne to be his personal lawyer--it's a deal she can't refuse. But this time Lianne is wise to Tyler's ways: he's after more than just a business arrangement; he wants her back where he feels she belongs...at his bidding!
The Disobedient Virgin (The Ramirez Brides #3)
by Sandra MartonShe's young, innocent and rich...Catarina Mendes, at twenty-one, is finally a free and independent woman. However, it's freedom at a price....Bound to a stranger...Jake Ramirez has become guardian to Cat. He must protect her from unscrupulous men and find her a husband.By her most precious gift!Jake is overwhelmed by Cat's beauty, but she's still a virgin. Can he resist bedding her--before he finds her a suitable husband...?
The Disobedient Wife
by Elizabeth PowerThe Charmer ...Ewen Fraser's rakish reputation went before him - Rosanna had read the newspapers, and could see with her own eyes his collection of girlfriends, past and present ...The Charmed ...But that didn't stop her falling for him - he was funny, tender, warm and sexy, and working closely with him was a joy ...The Trap ...Rosanna was tempted. Ewen was all that she'd ever wanted, but could she trust her instincts when they told her that Ewen, the infamous lover-and-leaver, had marriage at heart after all?
The Disreputable History of Frankie Landau-Banks (National Book Award Finalist)
by E. LockhartThe hilarious and razor-sharp story of how one girl went from geek to patriarchy-smashing criminal mastermind in two short years, from the #1 New York Times bestselling author of We Were Liars and Genuine Fraud.* National Book Award finalist ** Printz Honor * Frankie Landau-Banks at age 14:Debate Club.Her father's "bunny rabbit."A mildly geeky girl attending a highly competitive boarding school.Frankie Landau-Banks at age 15:A knockout figure.A sharp tongue.A chip on her shoulder.And a gorgeous new senior boyfriend: the supremely goofy, word-obsessed Matthew Livingston.Frankie Landau-Banks. No longer the kind of girl to take "no" for an answer.Especially when "no" means she's excluded from her boyfriend's all-male secret society.Not when she knows she's smarter than any of them.When she knows Matthew's lying to her.And when there are so many pranks to be done.Frankie Landau-Banks, at age 16:Possibly a criminal mastermind.This is the story of how she got that way.
The Dissertation: Tinieblas Book Two (Tinieblas #2)
by R. M. KosterThis novel posing as a dissertation on León Fuertes, the fictional president of a made-up Banana Republic is &“still fresh, funny, and disturbingly relevant&” (Publishers Weekly, starred review). To fulfill his PhD requirement, Camilo Fuertes decides to write about his father León, the martyred president of Tinieblas, a small country in Latin America. As Camilo traces his family&’s roots, we follow León along his twisted path through delinquency, learning, lust, and bravery to his historic position of leadership. At once a powerful vision of Latin American history and a brilliant parody of the academic form—complete with endnotes—The Dissertation is the second novel in Koster&’s acclaimed Tinieblas trilogy, and an essential postmodern novel in the tradition of Vonnegut, Barth, and Nabokov. &“One of the few books of the past 20 years that deserves to be called astonishing. It is a brilliant novel, structurally a marvel and, in all, a demonstration of elan as that quality seldom is experienced in a work of fiction.&” —The Des Moines Register &“Longtime Panama resident Koster portrays Latin America with a comedian&’s sense of timing, a scholar&’s sense of history, and a native&’s fond despair.&” —Publishers Weekly (starred review) &“Koster is that rare thing: a writer from the heart, passionate and uncompromising.&” —John le Carré
The Distance Travelled: A Novel
by Brett Alexander Savory“A completely unique take on life in hell. Snappy dialog and a bizarre backdrop set this adventure tale apart from the pack.” —Christopher Moore, New York Times–bestselling author of Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ’s Childhood Pal Why have certain denizens of Hell taken to throwing farm animals through innocent folks’ kitchen windows? How long does it take a dead, desiccated gas attendant to walk out to his pumps? What sort of relationship do the Lord of the Underworld and Hell’s Head Torturer have besides the obvious professional one? What kind of air conditioning units do they use down there? Do they listen to Cyndi Lauper? What is Hell’s official currency, and by what criteria did The Big Red Fella choose it? Can pigs eat cereal with a spoon? What nameless beast dwells in the flame pit near the hole to Upside? What is Upside, for that matter, and why should you care anyway? Within the pages of this book, you will find the answers to these pressing questions, as well as answers to other, significantly less pressing questions . . . “A raucous blood-and-guts pulper, complete with hardboiled mugs like PigBoy, Tom China, and Portnoy Spavin. By setting his hero’s mysterious quest in Hell itself, Brett Alexander Savory has started a whole new genre: Actual Underworld Noir.” —Stewart O’Nan, author of Snow Angels and Faithful, co-written with Stephen King “Distinctive and bizarre—and I mean that in a good way—this is a fine ride through some very unusual territories.” —Michael Marshall Smith, author of Spares and Only Forward
The Distractions
by Liza MonroySolitary tech worker Mischa Osborn is mourning the shelving of her passion project—an artificial intelligence algorithm capable of love—when a chance encounter with a social media celebrity leads her spiraling into an all-consuming obsession. Simultaneously, someone—or something—is watching.Mischa Osborn spends her days as a ProWatcher—keeping distracted people on task and lonely ones accompanied—from her Brooklyn Megabuilding, while eating PetriMeat Steax and working out with her favorite personal trainer, a straight-talking algorithm named Tory. Her carefully constructed, isolated existence is suddenly upended by a chance realspace encounter with a HighlightReel celebrity, Nicolás Adán Luchano. On their first date, hiking in Kuulsuits and watching DroneBeez pollinate flowers, Mischa experiences a brief but intense realspace connection. Mischa takes to relentlessly watching Nic onReel. As Mischa&’s ReelWatching spirals into an all-consuming obsession, and even realspace stalking, Mischa takes increasingly desperate measures to be seen and valued, sucking others into her vortex of obsession until she completely loses control. Meanwhile, someone is equally obsessed with Mischa, tracking her every move and perhaps even influencing her choices. A tale of how technology enables obsession, envy, and unrelenting comparison, told through an eccentric cast of interconnected characters, The Distractions invites us to reflect on who we are watching, and why.
The Diva’s Guide to Selling Your Soul
by Kathleen O'ReillyDon't hate me because I'm beautiful. . . Call me V. I used to be a nobody, just a girl from New Jersey who was probably going to hell anyway -- or worse, mediocrity and a size 14. Now I get whatever I desire just by casting a little spell. . . . a flawless body, a luxury penthouse, and a Fifth Avenue shop where rich women clamor for my overpriced handbags. Even better, I have power. I can taunt my ex-husband, break hearts without guilt, and love every minute of it. My secret? I lost the one thing I neverneeded in the first place: my soul. I sold it. And you'll never guess who's got it now. She's a devil in disguise. You know her as the dishiest gossip columnist in the city's trashiest tabloid. I call her Lucy. And our deal is this: the more clients I recruit for her Life Enrichment Program, the greater my rewards. But just between us, my fast track to heartless apathy has hit a few speed bumps -- lately, I've had the totally annoying impulse to do things that are. . . good. First there was rescuing a kid in the park. Then there was the date with the handsome, decent guy who wasn't even a celebrity. What's next, giving to charity or something? All I know is Lucy doesn't like it, not one little bit. And when she finds out, there will be hell to pay. . .
The Divine Comedy
by Craig RaineThe Divine Comedy is a fugue and a black comedy. In delicious and bawdy detail, an unnamed narrator offers snapshots into the lives and loves of an astonishing cast of philanderers and fuckups while along the way, the evidence amasses for a comic, cosmic conspiracy. Craig Raine's second novel, The Divine Comedy, is a voyeuristic meditation on sex and insecurity, God and the nature of the human body—its capacity for pleasure and pain, its desires, disappointments, and its many mortifying betrayals.
The Divine Farce
by Michael S. Graziano"A Dante/Beckett reduction of human struggle to its lowest common denominator."--Michael Mirolla, author of The Formal Logic of Emotion and Berlin"One of the most original and thought-provoking stories I have ever read...true literary art...Not a word is wasted in this masterpiece. Yes, I call it that. I have read many classics, and I can tell you that The Divine Farce should be counted among them; the finest in American literature."--GeekscribeThree strangers are condemned to live together in darkness, crushed together in a concrete stall so small that they can never sit down. Liquid food drips down from above. Waste drains through a grid on the floor. So begins one of the strangest, most surreal comments on the human experience, on love and hatred and the human ability to find good in any situation, no matter how difficult. Michael S. A. Graziano delights in the macabre and surreal, yet it is his optimism that lifts this little novel. Like The Love Song of Monkey, this book is deeply thought provoking, horrifying, and funny.Praise for The Love Song of Monkey:"Imaginative, intelligent narrative. Twin ideas of forgiveness and mercy twist through this strange, moving, patiently wrought novel."--Publishers Weekly"Fabulously imagined, seriously considered, and very funny. A kind of fairytale antithesis on the meaning of existence. . . . Fantastic."--Spirituality and Health Books"Strange but wonderful . . . like nothing I've read before. A very short book, but the scope is epic in detail. . . . I enjoyed the heck out of this book."--Geekscribe"Should be required reading in the writing grad schools. . . . There's nary a word wasted. What's left is comedy, retrospection, betrayal, tenderness, meditations on loneliness, a love story that survives all attempts to suppress it . . . not bad within 149 pages."--Barnstable PatriotMichael S. A. Graziano, Princeton University neuroscientist, is the author of the novella Hiding Places (New England Review, 1997), the novel The Love Song of Monkey (Leapfrog Press, 2008), and The Intelligent Movement Machine (Oxford University Press, 2008).
The Divorce Diet
by Ellen Hawley"Revenge is sweet. Reinventing yourself is even sweeter." --Cathy LambAbigail is sure the only thing standing between her and happiness is the weight she gained along with her beloved new baby. Until she instantly loses 170 pounds of husband.When Thad declares that "this whole marriage thing" is no longer working, a shell-shocked Abigail takes her infant daughter, Rosie, and moves back to her parents' house. Floundering, she turns to an imaginary guru and best friend, the author of her new weight-loss book. But surviving heartache, finding a job, and staying sane as a suddenly single new mom isn't easy, especially on a diet--sorry, life journey. Make an inventory of your skills, Abigail's guru instructs. Abigail loves cooking and preparing food--real food, not the fatless, joyless dishes her diet prescribes, or the instant-frozen-artificially flavored fare she finds in her mother's kitchen. So far, following everyone else's rules has led to being broke, lonely, and facing a lifetime of poached eggs, faux mayonnaise, and jobs in chain restaurants. What might happen if Abigail followed her own recipe for a good life instead?... Bitingly funny, wise, and insightful, Ellen Hawley's fresh new novel is an ode to food and self-discovery for any woman who's ever walked away from a relationship--or a diet--to find what true satisfaction is all about. "Food and love and loss and resilience--and a terrific narrative playfulness--are Hawley's recipe for a slyly entertaining and heartening novel." --Daniel Menaker, author of The Treatment
The Divorce Papers
by Susan RiegerWitty and wonderful, sparkling and sophisticated, this debut romantic comedy brilliantly tells the story of one very messy, very high-profile divorce, and the endearingly cynical young lawyer dragooned into handling it. Twenty-nine-year-old Sophie Diehl is happy toiling away as a criminal law associate at an old line New England firm where she very much appreciates that most of her clients are behind bars. Everyone at Traynor, Hand knows she abhors face-to-face contact, but one weekend, with all the big partners away, Sophie must handle the intake interview for the daughter of the firm's most important client. After eighteen years of marriage, Mayflower descendant Mia Meiklejohn Durkheim has just been served divorce papers in a humiliating scene at the popular local restaurant, Golightly's. She is locked and loaded to fight her eminent and ambitious husband, Dr. Daniel Durkheim, Chief of the Department of Pediatric Oncology, for custody of their ten-year-old daughter Jane--and she also burns to take him down a peg. Sophie warns Mia that she's never handled a divorce case before, but Mia can't be put off. As she so disarmingly puts it: It's her first divorce, too. Debut novelist Susan Rieger doesn't leave a word out of place in this hilarious and expertly crafted debut that shines with the power and pleasure of storytelling. Told through personal correspondence, office memos, emails, articles, and legal papers, this playful reinvention of the epistolary form races along with humor and heartache, exploring the complicated family dynamic that results when marriage fails. For Sophie, the whole affair sparks a hard look at her own relationships--not only with her parents, but with colleagues, friends, lovers, and most importantly, herself. Much like Where'd You Go, Bernadette, The Divorce Papers will have you laughing aloud and thanking the literature gods for this incredible, fresh new voice in fiction.
The Divorcee Said Yes! (The Wedding of the Year #2)
by Sandra MartonThree Brides, three grooms-and they all meet atTHE WEDDING OF THE YEARAnnie and Chase Cooper were reunited, reluctantly, for their daughter Dawn's wedding. But when Dawn got cold feet about her honeymoon, Chase had an idea. It was important that his daughter and her new husband should start life together believing love never dies, so why didn't he and Annie pretend they were reconciled? Just for a while...Enjoy the rekindled passion that sizzles between Annie and Chase. Is this to be the reconciliation of the year? Find out-in this, the second story in Sandra Marton's enthralling trilogy!
The Do-Gooder
by Jessie L. StarA college girl tries to make up for her bad karma by doing one good deed for anyone willing to ask—a witty, sweet romance perfect for fans of Christina Lauren and Abbi Glines.Lara Montgomery is no good. Having been scorned by her classmates since high school, she’s used to it. From where she’s sitting, the one with more notches on the bedpost has more fun anyway. At least, that’s what she tells herself. Really, a small part of her hopes that her massive amounts of bad karma can be neutralized by wearing her Do-Gooder hat—that thing she does where she’ll complete one good deed for anyone who asks. And she does an amazing job at it, if she does say so herself. Still, there’s one thing she knows she can’t make better, no matter how many problems she solves for other people: on the night her brother died, she was off hooking up with his not-so-single best friend, Fletch. It’s been three years since that night, and Fletch just wants her to let it go. To him, her persistence with the good deeds only serves to remind everyone in their small university town about what they did. As it is, they can’t help but get into a heated argument every time they run into each other on campus. And yet, neither of them can seem to stop that pesky electricity that runs between them whenever they get too close….
The Do-Over
by Bethany TurnerSometimes dreams come true. Other times, the best outcome begins with an epic fail.Career-driven McKenna Keaton has devoted her life to attaining the senior partnership at her law firm. So asking a man on a date should be nothing. But the past four days have been the worst of her life and have called everything she thought she knew about herself into question. Besides, she can&’t remember her last real date—one that didn&’t involve using a blind date as an opportunity to get a stranger&’s perspective on effective cross-examination techniques. (It&’s like sharing fondue with a jury!)But a real date? And with shy, nerdy Henry Blumenthal—McKenna&’s high school rival for valedictorian who once took three hours to beat her at chess? Scratch that. He&’s Hank Blume now, the famed documentarian, Durham&’s darling son, who has attained all his dreams and more. He also happens to look like he stepped out of an Eddie Bauer catalog.Whereas McKenna is a disgraced workaholic from New York on unpaid leave, accused of a white-collar crime she would never commit, succumbing to panic attacks, watching her dreams unravel. At age thirty-eight—and destined by the family curse to die before she turns forty, it appears—it&’s absolutely the wrong time to have a major crush on a man. Especially one who treasures his memories of McKenna as the girl Most Likely to Succeed.&“Pitch-perfect comedic timing, a relatable heroine, and a refreshing sweetness elevate this novel above the sea of modern rom-coms. The rare author who can make me laugh-out-loud, The Do-Over is Bethany Turner at her best.&” —Lauren Layne, New York Times bestselling author&“Bethany Turner has crafted a delightful, witty story with zippy dialogue, warmly relatable characters, and hilariously apt pop culture references. I found myself sneaking off to read just one more chapter. I&’m still smiling thinking about this book. Reading it felt like eating a big bowl of Lucky Charms mixed with Fruity Pebbles. A colorful explosion of happy.&” —Rachel Linden, bestselling author of The Enlightenment of BeesWitty and sweet contemporary romantic comedyStand-alone novelBook length: 99,000 wordsAlso by Bethany: Plot TwistIncludes discussion questions for book clubs
The Do-Over
by Lynn PainterA New York Times Bestseller In this &“unequivocally hilarious and delightful&” (Kirkus Reviews) young adult romp for fans of Recommended for You and A Cuban Girl&’s Guide to Tea and Tomorrow, a teen girl has the worst Valentine&’s Day ever—only to relive it over and over again. After living through a dumpster fire of a Valentine&’s Day, Emilie Hornby escapes to her grandmother&’s house for some comfort and a consolation pint of Ben & Jerry&’s. She passes out on the couch, but when she wakes up, she&’s back home in her own bed—and it&’s Valentine&’s Day all over again. And the next day? Another horrendous V-Day. Emilie is stuck in some sort of time loop nightmare that she can&’t wake up from as she re-watches her boyfriend, Josh, cheat on her day after day. In addition to Josh&’s recurring infidelity, Emilie can&’t get away from the enigmatic Nick, who she keeps running into—sometimes literally—in unfortunate ways. How many times can one girl passively watch her life go up in flames? And when something good starts to come out of these terrible days, what happens when the universe stops doling out do-overs?