- Table View
- List View
The Secret Cipher
by Whitaker RingwaldThe Secret Cipher is the sequel to The Secret Box, a rollicking adventure full of family rivalry, magic, questing, and laugh-out-loud humor that's perfect for fans of Dan Gutman, Wendy Mass, and Trenton Lee Stewart.Jax Malone and her cousin Ethan Hoche were not expecting one of Jax's birthday presents to contain a dangerous magical object from a mythical past: an urn with the dark power to suck hope out of the world.Though the first urn is safely hidden, there are two more urns that could rid humanity of both faith and love. And powerful enemies who want to find them and use them to control the world. Now, even though they were never meant to open the present and discover its secret, Jax and Ethan must race to find and destroy the two remaining urns before it's too late.
Secret Club: Book 2 (Horrid Henry #2)
by Francesca SimonNumber One for Fiendish Fun!This book contains the FIENDISH Nurse Needle, a secret club, an ANNOYING brother and a birthday party!Four utterly hilarious and totally brilliant Horrid Henry stories by Francesca Simon, with illustrations by Tony Ross. An irresistible introduction to reading for pleasure.
Secret Confessions of the Applewood PTA: A Novel
by Ellen MeisterWhen a Hollywood location scout comes to Applewood, Long Island, and announces that the local elementary school might make the perfect backdrop for an upcoming George Clooney movie, the PTA's decorum crumbles like a cookie from last week's bake sale. Enter Maddie, Ruth, and Lisa, three women who become the glue that holds the project together, forging a bond of friendship stronger than anyone could imagine. And not a moment too soon, as marriage woes, old flames, and scandalously embarrassing family members threaten to tear each of them apart. Is their powerful alliance strong enough to overcome the obstacles to getting the movie made in their town? And will their friendship be enough to mend their hearts and homes? Join them as they reach for the stars . . . and try to pull off a Hollywood ending of their own. At once tender and hilarious, Secret Confessions of the Applewood PTA is a captivating story that turns suburbia upside down . . . with more humor, heartache, and heat than one PTA can hold.
Secret Dad
by Raye MorganSECRET MARRIAGE?She called herself "Charlie Smith," and only Denver McCaine remembered her as Adrianna Charlyne Chandler. But Charlie was no longer the aloof-but-beautiful heiress a rugged mercenary like him could only dream about. Now she was a struggling single mom who'd run from the husband her wealthy family had chosen for her. And her new life was wonderful-until her family found her....The only way Charlie could keep her happy home was if she pretended to be Denver's wife. But her son secretly longed to make Denver his real dad. And soon Charlie wondered how much tender loving protection she could take before dreams of happily-ever-after took hold of her wistful heart....
The Secret Daughter
by Catherine SpencerThe baby deceptionSoon after rebel Joe Donnelly's sizzling night with debutante Imogen Palmer, she had fled. But ten years later, she was back-just as exquisite as ever. And Joe wanted answers. For he had stumbled upon the secret behind her hasty departure-she'd been pregnant with his child....In search for the truth, Joe was about to uncover an astonishing story that would culminate in a heart-rending reunion with the daughter he never knew he had, and her beautiful mother, Imogen-a woman he should never have allowed to get away....
Secret Dead Men
by Duane SwierczynskiA smart-talking supernatural noir, full of twists and turns, delivered at a whipalong pace about a dead investigative-journalist-turned-soul-collector on the trail of his nemesis – and murderer. Perfect for fans of Ben Aaranovitch and Richard Kadrey.&“Secret Dead Men is the most inventive, uplifting, hilarious, moving novel since Catcher in the Rye&” – Ken BruenDel Farmer isn&’t your ordinary hardboiled private eye. Instead of collecting fingerprints or clues, he collects souls of the recently dead. His latest dead guy, Brad Larsen, might just be the key to destroying Farmer&’s long-time nemesis, The Association.Of course, Farmer is sadly mistaken. An FBI agent unstuck in time is toying with him. A mysterious couple keeps trying to kill him. Another job―a mundane babysitting gig that pays the bills―is threatening to steer him way off course into a violent hell of sexual deceit, fractured identities, and cheap apartment toilets.With only a head packed full of nagging ghosts, Farmer realises this case might just drive him out of his mind, literally.
The Secret Diary of a British Muslim Aged 13 3/4
by Tez Ilyas'Essential...A complex blend of overexcited Adrian Mole-like anecdotes mixed with shocking moments of racism and insights into Muslim religious practices' Sunday TimesThe hilarious and pubescent debut book from your favourite British Muslim comedian (that's Tez Ilyas, by the way) is coming to a shop near you. You may know and love Tez from his stand-up comedy, his role as Eight in Man Like Mobeen, his Radio 4 series TEZ Talks, or panel shows such as Mock the Week and The Last Leg. Where you won't know him from is 1997 when he was 13 ¾. (But now you will - because that's what the book is about.) In this suitably dramatic rollercoaster of a teenage memoir, Tez takes us back to where it all began: a working class, insular British Asian Muslim community in his hometown of post-Thatcher Blackburn. Meet Ammi (Mum), Baji Rosey (the older sister), Shibz (the fashionable cousin), Was (the cool cousin), Shiry (the cleverest cousin) and a community with the most creative nicknames this side of Top Gun.Running away from shotgun-wielding farmers, successfully dodging arranged marriages, getting mugged, having front row seats to race riots and achieving formative sexual experiences doing stomach crunches in a gym, you could say life was fairly run of the mill. But with a GCSE pass rate of 30% at his school, his own fair share of family tragedy around the corner and 9/11 on the horizon, Tez's experiences of growing up as a British Muslim wasn't the fun, Jihad-pursuing affair the media wants you to believe. Well ... not always.At times shalwar-wettingly hilarious and at others searingly sad, The Secret Diary of a British Muslim Aged 13¾ shows 90s Britain at its best, and its worst.
The Secret Diary of a British Muslim Aged 13 3/4
by Tez IlyasThe hilarious and pubescent debut book from your favourite British Muslim comedian (that's Tez Ilyas, by the way) is coming to a shop near you. You may know and love Tez from his stand-up comedy, his role as Eight in Man Like Mobeen, his Radio 4 series TEZ Talks, or panel shows such as Mock the Week and The Last Leg. Where you won't know him from is 1997 when he was 13 ¾. (But now you will - because that's what the book is about.) In this suitably dramatic rollercoaster of a teenage memoir, Tez takes us back to where it all began: a working class, insular British Asian Muslim community in his hometown of post-Thatcher Blackburn. Meet Ammi (Mum), Baji Rosey (the older sister), Shibz (the fashionable cousin), Was (the cool cousin), Shiry (the cleverest cousin) and a community with the most creative nicknames this side of Top Gun.Running away from shotgun-wielding farmers, successfully dodging arranged marriages, getting mugged, having front row seats to race riots and achieving formative sexual experiences doing stomach crunches in a gym, you could say life was fairly run of the mill. But with a GCSE pass rate of 30% at his school, his own fair share of family tragedy around the corner and 9/11 on the horizon, Tez's experiences of growing up as a British Muslim wasn't the fun, Jihad-pursuing affair the media wants you to believe. Well ... not always.At times shalwar-wettingly hilarious and at others searingly sad, The Secret Diary of a British Muslim Aged 13¾ shows 90s Britain at its best, and its worst.
The Secret Diary of a British Muslim Aged 13 3/4 (Karen Pirie #71)
by Tez Ilyas'Essential...A complex blend of overexcited Adrian Mole-like anecdotes mixed with shocking moments of racism and insights into Muslim religious practices' Sunday TimesThe hilarious and pubescent debut book from your favourite British Muslim comedian (that's Tez Ilyas, by the way) is coming to a shop near you. You may know and love Tez from his stand-up comedy, his role as Eight in Man Like Mobeen, his Radio 4 series TEZ Talks, or panel shows such as Mock the Week and The Last Leg. Where you won't know him from is 1997 when he was 13 ¾. (But now you will - because that's what the book is about.) In this suitably dramatic rollercoaster of a teenage memoir, Tez takes us back to where it all began: a working class, insular British Asian Muslim community in his hometown of post-Thatcher Blackburn. Meet Ammi (Mum), Baji Rosey (the older sister), Shibz (the fashionable cousin), Was (the cool cousin), Shiry (the cleverest cousin) and a community with the most creative nicknames this side of Top Gun.Running away from shotgun-wielding farmers, successfully dodging arranged marriages, getting mugged, having front row seats to race riots and achieving formative sexual experiences doing stomach crunches in a gym, you could say life was fairly run of the mill. But with a GCSE pass rate of 30% at his school, his own fair share of family tragedy around the corner and 9/11 on the horizon, Tez's experiences of growing up as a British Muslim wasn't the fun, Jihad-pursuing affair the media wants you to believe. Well ... not always.At times shalwar-wettingly hilarious and at others searingly sad, The Secret Diary of a British Muslim Aged 13¾ shows 90s Britain at its best, and its worst.
The Secret Diary of a Grumpy Old Woman
by Judith HolderThe highly successful Grumpy Old Woman returns - and this time she's even grumpier!'It feels like only yesterday I was the youngest person in the room, I had my whole life in front of me. I had time to burn, I spent my whole day snogging boys and backcombing my hair. I was a young thing, with a lovely body, life was fun, and I hadn't a care in the world. Now - it feels like two minutes later - I'm a little bit old. OK, I'm not in elasticated stockings or on Meals on Wheels whizzing down the stairs on my stairlift, but my life is more than half over. I've been there, done that, got the packamac. I'm so old that I remember dances with drum solos, the arrival of unisex hairdressers and had a crush on Ilya Kuryakin. I am up at the top of the hill, and over the other side again. What all this means, is that I am grumpy. But I've earnt it... I lived through Boney M and leg warmers and the Crossroads Motel.Obviously in a book this size I wouldn't be able to share with you ALL of my grumps. But I've decided to write down some of the secret thoughts that beset a woman of a certain age, some of the wicked things that occur to a woman who takes a lot of things to the dry cleaners, has to have her roots done every four weeks and finds it hard to wear high heels. And guess what: they still fancy people, still have silly little crushes on people at work, still - shock horror - have sex. You will discover that women of a certain age are just as provocative and turned on as women in their twenties. Probably more so. So get over it. Middle-aged women are sexy, funny and infinitely lovable. They are also taking over the world.'
The Secret Diary of a Grumpy Old Woman
by Judith HolderThe highly successful Grumpy Old Woman returns - and this time she's even grumpier!'It feels like only yesterday I was the youngest person in the room, I had my whole life in front of me. I had time to burn, I spent my whole day snogging boys and backcombing my hair. I was a young thing, with a lovely body, life was fun, and I hadn't a care in the world. Now - it feels like two minutes later - I'm a little bit old. OK, I'm not in elasticated stockings or on Meals on Wheels whizzing down the stairs on my stairlift, but my life is more than half over. I've been there, done that, got the packamac. I'm so old that I remember dances with drum solos, the arrival of unisex hairdressers and had a crush on Ilya Kuryakin. I am up at the top of the hill, and over the other side again. What all this means, is that I am grumpy. But I've earnt it... I lived through Boney M and leg warmers and the Crossroads Motel.Obviously in a book this size I wouldn't be able to share with you ALL of my grumps. But I've decided to write down some of the secret thoughts that beset a woman of a certain age, some of the wicked things that occur to a woman who takes a lot of things to the dry cleaners, has to have her roots done every four weeks and finds it hard to wear high heels. And guess what: they still fancy people, still have silly little crushes on people at work, still - shock horror - have sex. You will discover that women of a certain age are just as provocative and turned on as women in their twenties. Probably more so. So get over it. Middle-aged women are sexy, funny and infinitely lovable. They are also taking over the world.'
The Secret Diary of a Grumpy Old Woman
by Judith HolderIt feels like only yesterday I was the youngest person in the room, I had my whole life in front of me. I had time to burn, I spent my whole day snogging boys and backcombing my hair. I was a young thing, with a lovely body, life was fun, and I hadn't a care in the world. Now - it feels like two minutes later - I'm a little bit old. OK, I'm not in elasticated stockings or on Meals on Wheels whizzing down the stairs on my stairlift, but my life is more than half over. I've been there, done that, got the packamac. I'm so old that I remember dances with drum solos, the arrival of unisex hairdressers and had a crush on Ilya Kuryakin. I am up at the top of the hill, and over the other side again. What all this means, is that I am grumpy. But I've earnt it... I lived through Boney M and leg warmers and the Crossroads Motel.Obviously in a book this size I wouldn't be able to share with you ALL of my grumps. But I've decided to write down some of the secret thoughts that beset a woman of a certain age, some of the wicked things that occur to a woman who takes a lot of things to the dry cleaners, has to have her roots done every four weeks and finds it hard to wear high heels. And guess what: they still fancy people, still have silly little crushes on people at work, still - shock horror - have sex. You will discover that women of a certain age are just as provocative and turned on as women in their twenties. Probably more so. So get over it. Middle-aged women are sexy, funny and infinitely lovable. They are also taking over the world.'Read by Judith Holder(p) 2008 Orion Publishing Group
The Secret Diary of Adrian Mole, Aged 13 3/4
by Sue TownsendThe book is written in a diary style by Adrian Mole, a thirteen year old boy who, although writes confidently, often misinterprets and does not understand the events that go on around him. The book follows him through the year of 1981 and a bit of 1982, starting with his new year's resolutions including "stopping squeezing my spots" and "vowing to never drink alcohol... after hearing disgusting noises from downstairs last night." Mole is a self-described intellectual who writes unreliably about the events he goes through and his troubles as an adolescent - resulting in a light-hearted and amusing book.
The Secret Diary of Adrian Mole, Aged 13 3/4: 'one Of Literature's Most Endearing Figures' (The Adrian Mole Series #1)
by Sue TownsendBritish adolescent angst has never been so &“laugh-out-loud funny&” as in this first encounter with a sharp-witted, pining, and achingly honest underdog (The New York Times). Perhaps when I am famous and my diary is discovered, people will understand the torment of being a 13¾-year-old undiscovered intellectual. Adrian Mole is approaching fourteen, and like all radical intellectuals he must amass his grievances: His acne vulgaris is grotesque; his crush, Pandora, received seventeen Valentine&’s Day cards; his PE teacher is a sadist; he fears his parents&’ marriage is over since they no longer smoke together; his dog has gone AWOL; no one appreciates his poetry; and Animal Farm has set him off pork for good. If everyone were as appalled as Adrian Mole, it would be a better world. Introducing &“one of literature&’s most endearing figures&”: a luckless adolescent of great expectations and dwindling patience who knows all—or believes he does—and tells all (The Observer). First published in 1982, Adrian&’s chronicle of angst has sold more than twenty million copies worldwide, spawned seven sequels, and been adapted for television and staged as a musical. Here&’s where it all began.
The Secret Diary of Boris Johnson Aged 13¼
by Lucien Young**STRICTLY UNOFFICIAL**'Deliciously funny and highly impudent' - Jon Culshaw The newly discovered diary of Boris Alexander de Pfeffel Johnson, aged 13¼, provides a fascinating glimpse into how Boris, a lazy, bumptious and overweening child, comes to believe he should be Prime Minister. Along the way, we see him hone the techniques and persona that will one day hoodwink a nation. ***Extract from 13-year-old Boris's TEN RULES FOR LIFE:It's not lying if you don't bother to learn the truth. Many people - politicians, for instance - make the mistake of going about laden with facts and statistics. However, when studiously ignorant of the aforementioned, one may argue one's case with total conviction.A friend is just an enemy you haven't yet made. Some say there's no 'I' in 'team'. Well, I say you can't spell 'friend' without 'fiend'. No matter how dear your chum, you never know what sort of treachery they harbour inside. After all, there are many people who consider me a friend!
The Secret Diary of Boris Johnson Aged 13¼
by Lucien Young**STRICTLY UNOFFICIAL**'Deliciously funny and highly impudent' - Jon CulshawThe newly discovered diary of Boris Alexander de Pfeffel Johnson, aged 13¼, provides a fascinating glimpse into how Boris, a lazy, bumptious and overweening child, comes to believe he should be Prime Minister. Along the way, we see him hone the techniques and persona that will one day hoodwink a nation. ***Extract from 13-year-old Boris's TEN RULES FOR LIFE:It's not lying if you don't bother to learn the truth. Many people - politicians, for instance - make the mistake of going about laden with facts and statistics. However, when studiously ignorant of the aforementioned, one may argue one's case with total conviction.A friend is just an enemy you haven't yet made. Some say there's no 'I' in 'team'. Well, I say you can't spell 'friend' without 'fiend'. No matter how dear your chum, you never know what sort of treachery they harbour inside. After all, there are many people who consider me a friend!
The Secret Diary of Boris Johnson Aged 13¼
by Lucien Young**STRICTLY UNOFFICIAL**'Deliciously funny and highly impudent' - Jon Culshaw The newly discovered diary of Boris Alexander de Pfeffel Johnson, aged 13¼, provides a fascinating glimpse into how Boris, a lazy, bumptious and overweening child, comes to believe he should be Prime Minister. Along the way, we see him hone the techniques and persona that will one day hoodwink a nation. ***Extract from 13-year-old Boris's TEN RULES FOR LIFE:It's not lying if you don't bother to learn the truth. Many people - politicians, for instance - make the mistake of going about laden with facts and statistics. However, when studiously ignorant of the aforementioned, one may argue one's case with total conviction.A friend is just an enemy you haven't yet made. Some say there's no 'I' in 'team'. Well, I say you can't spell 'friend' without 'fiend'. No matter how dear your chum, you never know what sort of treachery they harbour inside. After all, there are many people who consider me a friend!
The Secret Diary of Hendrik Groen: 83 1/4 Years Old (Hendrik Groen #1)
by Hester Velmans Hendrik GroenINTERNATIONAL BESTSELLER!For fans of A Man Called Ove comes a funny, big-hearted tale about an old man who is young at heart."Tears were streaming down my face - from laughing so hard. I couldn't stop grinning for three days." - Ouderenjournaal (Holland)Hendrik Groen may be old, but he is far from dead and isn't planning to be buried any time soon. Granted, his daily strolls are getting shorter because his legs are no longer willing and he has to visit his doctor more than he'd like. Technically speaking he is...elderly. But surely there is more to life at his age than weak tea and potted geraniums?Hendrik sets out to write an exposé: a year in the life of his care home in Amsterdam, revealing all its ups and downs--not least his new endeavor the anarchic Old-But-Not-Dead Club. And when Eefje moves in--the woman Hendrik has always longed for--he polishes his shoes (and his teeth), grooms what's left of his hair and attempts to make something of the life he has left, with hilarious, tender and devastating consequences.The Secret Diary of Hendrik Groen will not only delight older readers with its wit and relevance, but will charm and inspire those who have years to go before their own expiry date.
The Secret Diary of Jeremy Corbyn: A Parody
by Lucien YoungIn the grand tradition of The Diary of a Nobody comes the secret diary of the twenty-first century’s most unlikely leader: Jeremy Corbyn.Jeremy Corbyn is a committed allotment holder, expert jam maker, dedicated manhole cover inspector… oh, and occasional Leader of Her Majesty’s Opposition. When not cycling around his beloved Islington or tending to his courgettes, he spends his time frantically dodging MPs, spin doctors and vicious journalists craving his opinion on Brexit. In these tumultuous times, everyone wants a piece of the beardy firebrand. So who is the man behind the corduroy?The Secret Diary of Jeremy Corbyn plunges readers into a world of dizzying highs, crushing lows, fervent loyalty and bitter treachery – and that’s just the section about the Highbury Pottery Club. Readers will be moved, amused and astonished by the wit and insight of politics’ greatest outsider: the man, the legend, Jeremy Corbyn.
The Secret Diary of Mario Balotelli
by Bruno Vincent'He's a total rock 'n' roller. There's a bit of Mario in all of us - well, maybe not Gary Neville - but the rest of us most definitely.' Noel Gallagher <P><P>He may be football's latest superstar, but Mario Balotelli is just as famous off the pitch for his eccentricity and extraordinary antics. <P> From the time he let off fireworks in his bathroom to the notorious bib incident, he's rarely out of the news. <P>But in his secret diary* (not his actual secret diary), as we follow Mario through one turbulent football season and the trail of mayhem he leaves in his wake, we discover that the headlines only tell half the story. <P>Whether he's hiding Silvio Berlusconi in his basement, patrolling the streets of Manchester as a caped crusader or trying to be the first Premiership footballer to go to the moon, the truth is stranger, and much funnier, than we could have expected.
The Secret Diary of Mario Balotelli
by Bruno Vincent'He's a total rock 'n' roller. There's a bit of Mario in all of us - well, maybe not Gary Neville - but the rest of us most definitely.' Noel GallagherHe may be football's latest superstar, but Mario Balotelli is just as famous off the pitch for his eccentricity and extraordinary antics. From the time he let off fireworks in his bathroom to the notorious bib incident, he's rarely out of the news. But in his secret diary*, as we follow Mario through one turbulent football season and the trail of mayhem he leaves in his wake, we discover that the headlines only tell half the story. Whether he's hiding Silvio Berlusconi in his basement, patrolling the streets of Manchester as a caped crusader or trying to be the first Premiership footballer to go to the moon, the truth is stranger, and much funnier, than we could have expected.*not the actual diary of Mario Balotelli
The Secret Diary of Mona Hasan
by Salma HussainMona learns to find her voice over the course of a year that sees her immigrating from Dubai to Canada in this novel for fans of Front Desk by Kelly Yang.Mona Hasan is a young Muslim girl growing up in Dubai, United Arab Emirates, when the first Gulf War breaks out in 1991. The war isn&’t what she expects — &“We didn&’t even get any days off school! Just my luck&” — especially when the ground offensive is over so quickly and her family peels the masking tape off their windows. Her parents, however, fear there is no peace in the region, and it sparks a major change in their lives. Over the course of one year, Mona falls in love, speaks up to protect her younger sister, loses her best friend to the new girl at school, has summer adventures with her cousins in Pakistan, immigrates to Canada, and pursues her ambition to be a feminist and a poet.
The Secret Dream World of a Shopaholic (Shopaholic #1)
by Sophie KinsellaRebecca is a shopaholic who hides her bills and believes that if she never opens them, she's not liable for them. She persuades herself that she's actually saving money by buying a luxurious scarf that's on sale.
The Secret Fire
by Whitaker RingwaldThe third and final book in the critically acclaimed Secret Box trilogy, a series pitch-perfect for fans of humorous mystery capers like Escape from Mr. Lemoncello's Library and the Mysterious Benedict Society.Who knew that insisting on opening a strange birthday present would lead to being kidnapped by an evil Greek god determined to conquer the world? Jax Malone certainly didn't. But now she's trapped in the back of a limo bound for Epimetheus's secret lair. He wants to control the three ancient urns that used to belong to Pandora's daughter. Magical urns that can suck hope, faith, and love out of the world.Now Jax, Ethan, and Tyler's only chance to fight Epimetheus's formidable power might be to find a secret weapon--and to realize that their family ties are stronger than any magic.
Secret Games
by Jeanie LondonMarriage counselor Maggie James has a problem—she doesn'tbelieve in commitment! So when her patients claim that a sexyresort has cured their commitment woes, she decides to uncoverthe resort's secret—for her patients…and for herself. But to getin she'll need a lover—a pretend lover. And she can't think of abetter man for the job than her best friend, Sam Masters.Sam has loved Maggie for years, but he could never bringhimself to tell her. Now he has a chance to show her. He'llstimulate her senses…then seduce her senseless! He'll prove toher just how incredible the sex between them can be. Maggiemay think this is just a weekend of play, but Sam knows that withthe right moves, their sensual game can be for keeps.…