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Texas-Sized Temptation (Stetsons And Ceos Ser. #5)
by Sara OrwigA Santerre-a sexy one-dared trespass on oil magnate Jake Benton's ranch? The Santerre and Benton families had been feuding for generations. Yet here was Caitlin Santerre, standing inches away, asking nicely for the land that Jake had bought out from under her. Just how far would she go to get what she wanted?Illegitimate daughter of a billionaire, Caitlin had never been accepted by her family. But now, she was determined to hang on to the land that meant so much to her-even if she had to bargain with a Benton. Even if she ended up in his bed.
A Texas Thanksgiving (Homecoming Heroes #5)
by Margaret DaleyA frozen turkey dinner is just fine for former soldier and widower Evan Paterson. But his five-year-old daughter deserves better. So when she invites her best friend and her single mother to the Double P ranch for the holiday meal, Evan agrees. But not to a fix-up. Social worker Julia Saunders knows as much about heartache as he does, but Evan isn't ready to love again. Until a duo of pint-sized matchmakers show two stubborn grown-ups what being thankful truly means.
Texas Tycoon's Christmas Fiancée (Stetsons & CEOs #4)
by Sara OrwigJust how far was he willing to go? Dallas tycoon Nick Rafford had to get his black-sheep brother's baby back into the family fold. But the child's beautiful guardian was resistant to his initial offers. Nick could tell that changing Grace's mind would not be easy. He also knew she was not immune to his charms.Yet seduction would only get him so far. The oil mogul had to make the single mom an offer she couldn't refuse....
Text Appeal: A Novel
by Amber RobertsSTEM gets steamy when a coder takes up sexting to pay the bills in this daring debut novel, perfect for fans of Olivia Dade and Kate Stayman-London.As the only woman programmer at her firm, Lark is thrilled to land an account for a huge client. But her dream job quickly becomes a nightmare when she accidentally projects a scandalous (and completely unsolicited) picture from her phone onto the screen during a presentation. Before she can recover, her coworkers jump in to steal the account, leaving Lark jobless and broke.When a friend suggests text message–based sex work as a stopgap between jobs, Lark is dubious. She's all about sex positivity, but carrying out sexual fantasies—even digitally and anonymously—with complete strangers is daunting. How will she explain how she&’s earning a living—especially to Toby, her good friend and longtime hopeless crush?Still, she needs the money, and after a few (embarrassing and hilarious) false starts, she actually starts to like sexting—especially with one particularly charming and nerdy client who keeps popping up in her DMs. But as Lark and Toby grow closer, she finds herself with a decision to make: tell Toby she&’s a sex worker—and try to forget the anonymous client who has her struggling to separate work from real feelings—or keep the secrets that are piling up in her inbox.Sure to appeal to readers of Helen Hoang and Jen DeLuca, Amber Roberts&’s Text Appeal celebrates women in STEM, friends becoming lovers, and finding lasting love in the digital age.
Texting, AutoCorrect, and a Prius
by M. A. ChurchClay McDonald finds the perfect car on Craigslist and is quick to send the seller a text: Is your penis still for sale? AutoCorrect strikes again. Damn—he should’ve proofread. How embarrassing. Luckily Darrell Anderson, a mechanic and the owner of the Prius, is more amused than offended, and the two men agree to meet. When they do, the attraction is instant, and a date is arranged. But a series of mishaps, misunderstandings, and misplaced assumptions sorely test the new relationship. In a contemporary romantic comedy about the perils of technology and dating in the modern world, a text that went so wrong might just lead to something so right—but only if Clay can refrain from jumping to conclusions and give love the benefit of the doubt.
Texts from Bennett
by Mac LethalA family story for the twenty-first century, based on the phenomenally popular Texts from Bennett Tumblr blog, this epistolary novel chronicles the year that Bennett and the rest of his freeloading family moved into his cousin Mac's household.Hardworking Kansas rapper Mac has a problem, and its name is Bennett. His wannabe gangster cousin is seventeen, uses drugs and foul language, treats women worse than Charlie Sheen, and has just moved in. For the sake of aiding his addled aunt and trying to put Bennett on the straight and narrow, Mac dutifully takes them into his house when they lose their own. Through their interactions and legendary text message exchanges, one thing becomes absolutely clear: Bennett views the world differently than most. (Partly because he's looking through smoke-filled glasses). In a year of ups and downs, Mac and Bennett need to stick together and make this new family unit work. From stealing cats, to legendary fights with the uncontrollable Mercedes, to his "11 commandmints of gittin bitchez," Bennett's going to make that more than a little difficult. But if Mac pays enough attention, maybe, just maybe he'll learn something along the way himself. Regardless of whether they survive their time together, one thing's for sure, though: Bennett is no ordinary teenager, and certainly not one you'll soon forget.
Texts From Dog: The Dog Delusion
by October JonesIn April 2012, English animator Joe Butcher discovered he could send text messages to HIMSELF on his mobile phone. Naturally, Butcher decided that the best use for this feature would be to send passive aggressive messages to his fictional alter ego October Jones, under the guise of Cooper, his British Bulldog. A classic tale of Man & Dog for the gadget driven internet generation. After taking screenshots of his canine conversations, Butcher posted them to his 10,000 Twitter followers, then created a Tumblr, which attracted over 80,000 followers in a month. Now the further exploits of Dog and his weary owner have been brought together in this hilarious book, which includes over 100 texts not seen on the website.
Texts from Dog
by October JonesHe&’s a dog with a phone . . . My dog sends me texts. Yeah. It&’s weird. When October Jones figured out he could send text messages to himself on his mobile phone, he naturally decided that the best use of this discovery was to send passive-aggressive messages to himself under the guise of his bulldog. And so the exasperating, slightly delusional, and utterly endearing Dog and his alter-ego, BatDog, were born. Texts from Dog features Dog&’s attempts to keep the neighborhood safe from the likes of Mr. Postman and his arch-nemesis Cat-Cat—he has managed to only smash three TVs and a patio door in the process. And in between crime fighting sprees and run-ins with the squirrel mafia, there are romantic interludes with pillows, fetch sessions gone terribly awry, and the abusive banter only a bromance between man and his text-savvy dog can spawn. For those of us who have ever had a conversation with a pet in our heads, Texts from Dog will make you laugh out loud and perhaps even make you think twice about leaving your pet home alone for the day.
Texts From Dog: The Dog Delusion
by October JonesDog is back - the Bark Knight has risen. Unfortunately for weary owner October Jones (but luckily for us), that means there is a brand new selection of the funniest, most bizarre texts from his insane canine companion. There is also the welcome return of Batdog and CatCat (half cat, half cat), and a new 'friend' in Benedict, the creepiest pug in the world.
Texts from Jane Eyre: And Other Conversations with Your Favorite Literary Characters
by Daniel M. LaveryHilariously imagined text conversations—the passive aggressive, the clever, and the strange—from classic and modern literary figures, from Scarlett O'Hara to Jessica WakefieldDaniel M. Lavery, the co-creator of the cult-favorite website The Toast, presents this whimsical collection of hysterical text conversations from your favorite literary characters. Everyone knows that if Scarlett O'Hara had an unlimited text-and-data plan, she'd constantly try to tempt Ashley away from Melanie with suggestive messages. If Mr. Rochester could text Jane Eyre, his ardent missives would obviously be in all-caps. And Daisy Buchanan would not only text while driving, she'd text you to pick her up after she totaled her car. Based on the popular web-feature, Texts from Jane Eyre is a witty, irreverent mashup that brings the characters from your favorite books into the twenty-first century.
Texts from Jane Eyre: And other conversations with your favourite literary characters
by Daniel Mallory OrtbergMallory Ortberg presents...Texts from Jane Eyre is a whimsical collection of sharp, satirical and side-splittingly funny text message conversations from your favourite literary characters. Of course if Scarlett O'Hara had an unlimited data plan, she'd be sexting Ashley Wilkes at all hours; and if Mr Rochester could text Jane Eyre, his ARDENT MISSIVES would be in ALL-CAPS; and Daisy Buchanan would text you from behind the wheel - and then text you to come pick her up after the car crash. Texts from Jane Eyre is a witty, original and very clever kind of mashup that brings your favourite authors and literary characters right into the twenty-first century.Mallory Ortberg is a genius.
Texts From Jane Eyre: And Other Conversations With Your Favorite Literary Characters
by Mallory OrtbergHilariously imagined text conversations--the passive aggressive, the clever, and the strange--from classic and modern literary figures, from Scarlett O'Hara to Jessica Wakefield Mallory Ortberg, the co-creator of the cult-favorite websiteThe Toast, presents this whimsical collection of hysterical text conversations from your favorite literary characters. Everyone knows that if Scarlett O'Hara had an unlimited text-and-data plan, she'd constantly try to tempt Ashley away from Melanie with suggestive messages. If Mr. Rochester could text Jane Eyre, his ardent missives would obviously be in all-caps. And Daisy Buchanan would not only text while driving, she'd text you to pick her up after she totaled her car. Based onthe popular web-feature,Texts from Jane Eyre is a witty, irreverent mashup that brings the characters from your favorite books into the twenty-first century.
Texts From Last Night
by Lauren Leto Ben BatorEver texted after one too many? Ever texted the wrong person by mistake? Ever fired off a message before double-checking your predictive spelling? You are not alone! Texts From Last Night is a celebration of the best, worst and weirdest texts that have ever been sent. Humiliating for the sender but hilarious for the rest of us, it includes gems such as: - I am coming home for anal - "a nap" - before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl," i was - I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen making spaghetti From the website textsfromlastnight. com, which has 4 million daily users, these are genuine, text-sized windows onto hilarious cringeful real-life moments. Once you've read Texts From Last Night you might think twice before pressing send on that mistyped message to the wrong person in the middle of the night after one too many. Then again, you might not. . .
Texts from Mittens: A Cat Who Has an Unlimited Data Plan...and Isn't Afraid to Use It
by Angie BaileyTexts from Mittens is a series of text message conversations between a snappy, self-absorbed housecat named Mittens and his long-suffering human, a single woman who works away from home during the day. Mittens relentlessly hassles his human all day long, while only taking breaks to watch Judge Judy, hang with his best friend Stumpy, complain about the antics of Drunk Patty the neighbor, ask Grandma for money to buy useless items from QVC, and harass the "filthy beast" dog, Phil. Angie Bailey is an award-winning writer and blogger, humorist, and professional member of the Cat Writers' Association. Her primary blog, Catladyland, has won many awards, and her humor writing is featured nearly daily on Catster.com, one of the most popular cat sites on the Web. She loves to photograph her cats in silly poses and sleeps with one eye open. And yes, she has three cats. "Each installment of Texts From Mittens is like a little gift to brighten your day!" -Kate Benjamin, Hauspanther founder and co-author of Catification with Jackson Galaxy "Texts From Mittens makes me wish my cat had thumbs! This is a hilarious book; Angie Bailey has done it again!" -Jeremy Greenberg, Author of Sorry I Barfed on Your Bed "We all knew that cats were hilarious, but Ms. Bailey's sardonic cat quips really take their mannerisms, attitude and occasional apathy to another level." -Susan Michals, Curator of Cat Art Show Los Angeles Come home! There's an emergency! What?? Are you OK? My dish is half empty! I'll be home soon. You wish starvation upon me! Stop being dramatic. Am weeak. Caan hasrdly tyyppe. Are you going to wear those black pants on your bed? Yes. I have a date. They're comfortable. Mittens, get off my pants! FYI: Poly-blend makes your butt look big
Thank You, Amelia Bedelia (I Can Read! #Level 2)
by Peggy ParishMrs. Rogers is glad Amelia Bedelia can help get everything ready for the guests. Stripping sheets, taking spots out of dresses, and checking shirts are just some of what Amelia does.
Thank You for Coming to Hattiesburg: One Comedian's Tour of Not-Quite-the-Biggest Cities in the World
by Todd BarryFrom the veteran comedian and actor from The Wrestler and Louie comes a hilarious book of travel essays from his time on tour through secondary markets in the US, Canada, and Israel.Hello. It’s Todd Barry. Yes, the massively famous comedian. I have billions of fans all over the world, so I do my fair share of touring. While I love doing shows in the big cities (New York, Philadelphia), I also enjoy a good secondary market (Ithaca, Bethlehem). Performing in these smaller places can be great because not all entertainers stop there on tour; they don’t expect to see you. They’re appreciative. They say things like “Thank you for coming to Hattiesburg” as much as they say “Nice show.” And almost every town has their version of a hipster coffee shop, so I can get in my comfort zone. My original plan was to book one secondary market show in all fifty states, in about a year, but that idea was funnier than anything in my act. So, instead of all fifty states in a year, my agent booked multiple shows in a lot of states, plus Israel and Canada. Thank You For Coming to Hattiesburg is part tour diary, part travel guide, and part memoir (Yes, memoir. Just like the thing presidents and former child stars get to write). Follow me on my journey of small clubs, and the occasional big amphitheater. Watch me make a promoter clean the dressing room toilet in Connecticut, see me stare at beached turtles in Maui, and see how I react when Lars from Metallica shows up to see me at a rec center in Northern California. I’d love to tell you more, but I need to go book a flight to Evansville, Indiana.
Thank You for Listening: A Novel
by Julia WhelanFrom the author of My Oxford Year, Julia Whelan’s uplifting novel tells the story of a former actress turned successful audiobook narrator—who has lost sight of her dreams after a tragic accident—and her journey of self-discovery, love, and acceptance when she agrees to narrate one last romance novel.For Sewanee Chester, being an audiobook narrator is a long way from her old dreams, but the days of being a star on film sets are long behind her. She’s found success and satisfaction from the inside of a sound booth and it allows her to care for her beloved, ailing grandmother. When she arrives in Las Vegas last-minute for a book convention, Sewanee unexpectedly spends a whirlwind night with a charming stranger. On her return home, Sewanee discovers one of the world’s most beloved romance novelists wanted her to perform her last book—with Brock McNight, the industry’s hottest, most secretive voice. Sewanee doesn’t buy what romance novels are selling—not after her own dreams were tragically cut short—and she stopped narrating them years ago. But her admiration of the late author, and the opportunity to get her grandmother more help, makes her decision for her. As Sewanee begins work on the book, resurrecting her old romance pseudonym, she and Brock forge a real connection, hidden behind the comfort of anonymity. Soon, she is dreaming again, but secrets are revealed, and the realities of life come crashing down around her once more.If she can learn to risk everything for desires she has long buried, she will discover a world of intimacy and acceptance she never believed would be hers.
Thank You for Sharing: A Novel
by Rachel Runya KatzOur new favorite trope: Childhood friends. To enemies. To lovers. In a chemistry-filled debut romance.Daniel Rosenberg and Liyah Cohen-Jackson’s last conversation—fourteen years ago at summer camp—ended their friendship. Until they find themselves seated next to each other on a plane, and bitterly pick up right where they left off. At least they can go their separate ways again after landing... That is, until Daniel's marketing firm gets hired by the Chicago museum where Liyah works as a junior curator, and they’re forced to collaborate with potential career changing promotions on the line.With every meeting and post-work social gathering with colleagues, the tension (and chemistry) between Daniel and Liyah builds until they’re forced to confront why they broke apart years ago at camp. But as they find comfort in their shared experiences as Jews of color and fumble towards friendship, can they ignore their growing feelings for each other?With sexy charm and undeniable wit, Rachel Runya Katz's sparkling debut, Thank You For Sharing, proves that if you're open to love, anything is possible."[An] excellent, multilayered look at the experiences of Jews of color in this deftly woven story...Katz successfully portrays how romance meets real life in this terrific debut." - Library Journal (starred review)"Rachel Runya Katz’s Thank You for Sharing is a magical love story. This is a poignant, sharp and sexy romance with the kind of complex, big-hearted characters and emotional honesty readers will adore. I loved it!" - Carley Fortune, New York Times bestselling author of Every Summer After"This book wrapped a fist around my heart and refused to let go. Gorgeously written, with two magnetic leads, an irresistible group of friends, and a warmth that radiates from every page. Rachel Runya Katz is a true talent." - Rachel Lynn Solomon, New York Times bestselling author of The Ex Talk"Impossible to put down! A delicious pressure-cooker-style slow burn of a romance, Thank You for Sharing contains the greatest ‘only one bed’ scene I’ve ever had the pleasure of reading. Not only is the romance delightful, but Rachel Runya Katz handles the complexity of grief and trauma with the tenderest of touches, creating a safe, welcoming space for her characters and readers alike. I have no doubt that readers will fall head over heels for Liyah and Daniel!" - Alexandria Bellefleur, bestselling, Lambda award-winning author of Written in the Stars and The Fiancée Farce
Thank You for Smoking: A Novel
by Christopher BuckleyNobody blows smoke like Nick Naylor. He's a spokesman for the Academy of Tobacco Studies-in other words, a flack for cigarette companies, paid to promote their product on talk and news shows. The problem? He's so good at his job, so effortlessly unethical, that he's become a target for both anti-tobacco terrorists and for the FBI. In a country where half the people want to outlaw pleasure and the other want to sell you a disease, what will become of the original Puff Daddy?From the Trade Paperback edition.
Thank You for the Music: Stories
by Jane McCaffertyThis collection of short stories, linked by the theme of music, is a gorgeous follow-up to One Heart, award-winning writer Jane McCafferty’s critcially acclaimed debut novelIn 14 original stories, Jane McCafferty illuminates modern life weaving her love of music throughout the lives and stories of her characters. From two middle-aged strangers who meet in an empty baseball stadium during a rainstorm, to a 23-year-old man who brings his 62-year-old wife home to meet his parents, to a young couple who live next door to an unemployed clown and his wife, these stories are at once unexpected and enthralling.
Thank You, Goodnight: A Novel
by Andy AbramowitzIn Thank You, Goodnight, hailed by Billboard as &“High Fidelity and About a Boy with a dose of Music & Lyrics thrown in,&” the lead singer of a one-hit wonder 90s band tries for one more swing at the fence.Teddy Tremble is nearing forty and has settled into a comfortable groove, working at a stuffy law firm and living in a downtown apartment with a woman he thinks he might love. Sure, his days aren’t as exciting as the time he spent as the lead singer of Tremble, the rock band known for its mega-hit “It Feels Like a Lie,” but that life has long since passed its sell-by date.But when Teddy gets a cryptic call from an old friend, he’s catapulted into contemplating the unthinkable: reuniting Tremble for one last shot at rewriting history. Never mind that the band members haven’t spoken in ten years, that they left the music scene in a blazing cloud of indifference, and that the only fans who seem to miss them reside in an obscure little town in Switzerland.If Teddy manages to snooker his band mates out of their adult lives, can a once immature, self-involved fallen idol find his way back to the top—and possibly back to the one who got away? Thank You, Goodnight is debut novelist Andy Abramowitz’s hilarious, honest, and “unfailingly heartfelt” (The Washington Post) story about love, lyrics, and finding one’s legacy in the unlikeliest of places.
Thank You, Jeeves
by P. G. Wodehouse"P. G. Wodehouse wrote the best English comic novels of the century." --Sebastian Faulks Bertram Wooster's interminable banjolele playing has driven Jeeves, his otherwise steadfast gentleman's gentleman, to give notice. The foppish aristocrat cannot survive for long without his Shakespeare-quoting and problem-solving valet, however, and after a narrowly escaped forced marriage, a cottage fire, and a great butter theft, the celebrated literary odd couple are happy to return to the way things were.
Thank You, Jeeves
by P. G. WodehouseA Jeeves and Wooster novel. Thank You, Jeeves is the first novel to feature the incomparable valet Jeeves and his hapless charge Bertie Wooster - and you've hardly started to turn the pages when he resigns over Bertie's dedicated but somewhat untuneful playing of the banjo. In high dudgeon, Bertie disappears to the country as a guest of his chum Chuffy - only to find his peace shattered by the arrival of his ex-fiancée Pauline Stoker, her formidable father and the eminent loony-doctor Sir Roderick Glossop. When Chuffy falls in love with Pauline and Bertie seems to be caught in flagrante, a situation boils up which only Jeeves (whether employed or not) can simmer down...
Thank You, Mr Panda (Mr Panda #3)
by Steve AntonyLearn to say 'Thank You' with Mr Panda in this charmingly funny picture book. Mr Panda has surprise presents for his friends. Some are too big, some are too heavy, and some are simply bizarre... But remember, it's the thought that counts! "Definitely silly, but with plenty of opportunity for a discussion about manners afterwards should you so wish." The Bookbag Look out for more books starring the grumpy (but loveable!) Mr Panda. Over half a million copies sold to date! Please Mr Panda I'll Wait Mr Panda Goodnight Mr PandaMr Panda's ColoursMr Panda's Feelings
Thank You, Next
by Andie J. ChristopherOne of Amazon's Best Romances of June!Alex Turner is never The One—but always the last one an ex dates before finding love—and now she&’s determined to find out why in this hilarious new rom-com. Single divorce attorney Alex Turner is watching reality TV when she sees her latest ex&’s new fiancée picking out her wedding dress. Yet again, the guy she dumped went on to marry (or at least seriously commit to) the next person he dates after her. Fed up with being the precursor to happily ever after, she decides to interview all her exes to find out why. Up-and-coming chef Will Harkness mixes with Alex like oil and vinegar, but forced proximity growing up means their lives are forever entwined. When Will learns Alex and her friends are going on a wild romp through Los Angeles to reconnect with her ex-boyfriends, he decides to tag along. If he can discover what her exes did wrong, he can make sure he doesn&’t make the same mistake with Alex. On this nonstop journey through the streets of LA, Alex realizes the answer to her question might be the man riding shotgun…