- Table View
- List View
Snail & Worm Again: Three Stories About Two Friends (Snail and Worm Ser.)
by Tina KüglerA trio of &“cheerfully screwy stories . . . delivers a steady stream of laughs&” in this Geisel Honor Winner from the author of the Fox Tails books (Publishers Weekly). In this silly sequel to Snail and Worm, the dynamic duo are back for more fun and giggles in three new comic shorts brimming with quirky humor and unflappable friendship. At turns clever and sweet, these laugh-out-loud stories are perfect for readers coming out of their own shells and making the transition between picture books and chapter books. &“Themes of acceptance, self-love, and appreciation make this an excellent choice for early readers or a one-on-one storybook for older prereaders.&”—Booklist &“The friends&’ banter is light and humorous, and their foibles and misunderstandings will provoke laughter as surely as the expressive, multimedia cartoon illustrations will.&”—Kirkus Reviews
The Snake Has All the Lines
by Jean KerrThe #1 New York Times–bestselling author of Please Don&’t Eat the Daisies offers another hilarious look at home life, show business, and more. Jean Kerr played many roles in her life, from exasperated mother to Broadway playwright and keen observer of mid-twentieth century suburbia. She also became one of America&’s most beloved humorists by sharing her insights and anecdotes in a series of popular newspaper columns. In The Snake Has All the Lines, Kerr explores topics ranging from family vacations and modern convenience to the trials and tribulations of opening a new play. With her inimitable wit, she reminds us that while life may be a day at the beach, a day at the beach with small children can have you questioning your life choices in no time.
Snake Oil: A Novel
by Kelsey Rae Dimberg“A brisk and fun thriller… This is a novel with a lively, churning plot, about which nothing more can be said without revealing its deftly constructed twists. Blending soap-operatic thrills and boardroom intrigue, Snake Oil is consistently satisfying, a reminder that it might be intoxicating to watch bubbles grow, but it’s always more memorable when they burst.” — San Francisco ChronicleA razor-sharp literary thriller about three women vying for power at a wellness startup, where the cost of ambition might be deadlyOne woman’s elixir is another woman’s poisonRhoda West is Silicon Valley’s favorite female CEO: the luminously charismatic founder of the fast-growing startup Radical, a wellness company whose core mission is the betterment of women’s lives. Rhoda’s Instagram page offers intimate glimpses of her personal life alongside promotions for the cult-status products developed in the Well, Radical’s secretive lab.Dani Lang is a “quester,” as Rhoda calls her most avid followers. Dani found Radical at a low point in her life, and took an entry level job just to get in the door. When she volunteers to test a controversial new supplement, Dani wins an opportunity to rise in the company, even to work with Rhoda herself.Cecelia Cole is a “quasher.” She grinds away at the Customer Worship queue, resenting the entitled customers, the woo-woo Radical jargon, and Rhoda’s smiling hypocrisy. Cecelia, who suffers from a miserable chronic illness, knows that the remedies Rhoda sells can’t cure real sickness.Just as Rhoda announces another fundraising round that could turn Radical into a billion-dollar unicorn, an anonymous Twitter account begins spilling snarky gossip from inside the startup. Is Rhoda really the nurturing leader she presents to the world, or a fraud? Or is this just another case of a woman in business being punished for her strength and audacity?Tensions rise and loyalties clash, then tragedy strikes during a company party. In the aftermath of what looks more and more like a crime, even the most faithful questers begin to wonder to what lengths Rhoda will go to protect her company.Part page-turning suspense, part darkly comic skewering of startup culture, Snake Oil is a gripping exploration of ambition and authenticity, shining a revealing light on the wellness world.
Snap: A Novel
by Susin NielsenA laugh-out-loud novel about the consequences of being pushed to the edge—and plummeting right over itFrances Partridge, fifty-five, is a beloved children’s author. Geraint Blevins, forty-one, is an auto mechanic and devoted family man. Parker Poplawski, twenty-three, is just starting her career as a wardrobe assistant on a hit TV show. What do these people have in common? Nothing, that’s what. Until each of them reaches a breaking point and snaps in spectacular fashion. They meet in a court-mandated anger management class: three very different people, forced to spend a lot of time together, who slowly end up bonding and helping one another in unexpected ways, whether it’s to move on or to exact revenge. Lighthearted, timely, and funny, Snap is Nielsen at the top of her storytelling game, delivering flawed but relatable characters whose heartaches, foibles, and choices will make you cringe as you laugh out loud.
Snapcat: The Cats Who Love to Snap (and Chat)
by Rosie RyderJoin the cats who snap, and discover the candid stories of their daily lives. These cool kitties have a lot to say, and whether it’s with a cheeky filter or a sassy caption, they say it with style. You’ll see your fur-miliar friends through a whole new lens.
Snapcat: The Cats Who Love to Snap (and Chat)
by Rosie RyderJoin the cats who snap, and discover the candid stories of their daily lives. These cool kitties have a lot to say, and whether it’s with a cheeky filter or a sassy caption, they say it with style. You’ll see your fur-miliar friends through a whole new lens.
Snapped (Playbook, The #4)
by Alexa MartinOne of PopSugar's Best Romances of OctoberWith the stakes this high, it&’s no longer just a game for the Mustang&’s quarterback in this romance by the author of Blitzed. Elliot Reed is living her best life—or pretending to. She owes it to her dad&’s memory to be happy and make the most of her new job as Strategic Communications Manager for the Denver Mustangs. Things are going well until star quarterback Quinton Howard Jr. decides to use the field as his stage and takes a knee during the national anthem. As the son of a former professional athlete, Quinton knows the good, the bad, and the ugly about football. He's worked his entire life to gain recognition in the sport, and now that he has it, he&’s not about to waste his chance to change the league for better. Not even the brilliant but infuriating Elliot, who the Mustangs assign to manage him, will get Quinton back in line. A rocky initial meeting leads to more tension between Quinton and Elliot. But as her new job forces them to spend time together, Elliot realizes they may have more in common than she could've imagined. With her job and his integrity on the line, this is one coin toss that nobody can win.
Snapper (Vintage Contemporaries)
by Brian KimberlingA great, hilarious new voice in fiction: the poignant, all-too-human recollections of an affable bird researcher in the Indiana backwater as he goes through a disastrous yet heartening love affair with the place and its people. Nathan Lochmueller studies birds, earning just enough money to live on. He drives a glitter-festooned truck, the Gypsy Moth, and he is in love with Lola, a woman so free-spirited and mysterious she can break a man's heart with a sigh or a shrug. Around them swirls a remarkable cast of characters: the proprietor of Fast Eddie's Burgers & Beer, the genius behind "Thong Thursdays"; Uncle Dart, a Texan who brings his swagger to Indiana with profound and nearly devastating results; a snapping turtle with a taste for thumbs; a German shepherd who howls backup vocals; and the very charismatic state of Indiana itself. And at the center of it all is Nathan, creeping through the forest to observe the birds he loves and coming to terms with the accidental turns his life has taken.er edition.
Snarf Attack, Underfoodle, and the Secret of Life: The Riot Brothers Tell All
by Mary AmatoMove over, Captain Underpants, a couple of new pranksters are in town. Narrated by fifth-grader Wilbur and featuring his third-grade brother, Orville, this hilarious story follows the antics of two boys with overactive imaginations and a comfortable sibling relationship. The action is divided into three "books," with six chapters each. In the first, the brothers are determined to catch a crook. They make a windfall by giving lessons in being annoying to their classmates, are reprimanded by the principal (who is also their mother), and still manage to foil a bank robber on the way home from school. Next, while searching for treasure, they find a mysterious box in the closet. After they finally open it, they discover that the contents, although not worth money, are still valuable. The final installment has the duo building a catapult designed to overthrow a king and using it instead to defeat a bully. Illustrations described.
Snarf Attack, Underfoodle, and the Secret of Life: The Riot Brothers Tell All (The Riot Brothers)
by Mary Amato Ethan LongMove over, Captain Underpants, a couple of new pranksters are in town. Narrated by fifth-grader Wilbur and featuring his third-grade brother, Orville, this hilarious story follows the antics of two boys with overactive imaginations and a comfortable sibling relationship. The action is divided into three "books," with six chapters each. In the first, the brothers are determined to catch a crook. They make a windfall by giving lessons in being annoying to their classmates, are reprimanded by the principal (who is also their mother), and still manage to foil a bank robber on the way home from school. Next, while searching for treasure, they find a mysterious box in the closet. After they finally open it, they discover that the contents, although not worth money, are still valuable. The final installment has the duo building a catapult designed to overthrow a king and using it instead to defeat a bully.
The Snark Bible: A Reference Guide to Verbal Sparring, Comebacks, Irony, Insults, and So Much More
by Lawrence DorfmanThe lord of snark, Lawrence Dorfman, is back! With this treasury of backhanded compliments, sarcastic insults, and catty comebacks, Dorfman gives us transformative wisdom that's sure to change your life-or at least induce a light chuckle.One question plagues us all: How do we survive all the Sturm und Drang of everyday life? The answer is but one word: snark."She wears her clothes as if they were thrown on by a pitchfork." -Jonathan Swift"Why don't you get a haircut? You look like a chrysanthemum." -P. G. Wodehouse"He's a mental midget with the IQ of a fence post." -Tom Waits"They hardly make 'em like him anymore-but just to be on the safe side, he should be castrated anyway." -Hunter S. Thompson"He has a Teflon brain . . . nothing sticks" -Lily Tomlin"He has no more backbone than a chocolate éclair." -Theodore RooseveltSnark will keep the wolves at bay (or at least out on the porch). Snark, much like a double scotch, will help you deal with relatives, shopping, and rudeness; it is an outlet for the unleashed vitriolic bile that's saved itself up over the months. Like a shield, it will protect you while you go about your life. Snark is your answer!
The Snark Handbook: A Reference Guide to Verbal Sparring (Snark Series)
by Lawrence DorfmanIt's impossible to go a full day without using snark, so why fight it? Snark is everywhere, from television to movies to everyday life. This lively collection provides hours of entertainment--better than an Etch A Sketch, and more fun than Silly Putty! At the heart of it, being in a state of snark can be one of the most useful tools at one's disposal and hence (yes, I used "hence"), a powerful way to get what you want. With snark, you can catch people completely off-guard, and royally piss them off. Included here is the Snark Hall of Fame, the Best Snarky Responses to Everyday Dumbassness, and much more. It's a book that will make you laugh. It's a book that will make someone else cry. It's a book every student of the American psyche (that's all of us, Sparky) needs to have. Let loose. Let your inner anger become a positive rather than a negative, but most of all, have fun. (Yeah, like that's something you know how to do.)
The Snark Handbook: A Reference Guide to Verbal Sparring (Snark Series)
by Lawrence DorfmanIt’s impossible to go a full day without using snark, so why fight it? Snark is everywhere, from television to movies to everyday life. This lively collection provides hours of entertainment—better than an Etch A Sketch, and more fun than Silly Putty! At the heart of it, being in a state of snark can be one of the most useful tools at one’s disposal and hence (yes, I used “hence”), a powerful way to get what you want. With snark, you can catch people completely off-guard, and royally piss them off. Included here is the Snark Hall of Fame, the Best Snarky Responses to Everyday Dumbassness, and much more. It’s a book that will make you laugh. It’s a book that will make someone else cry. It’s a book every student of the American psyche (that’s all of us, Sparky) needs to have. Let loose. Let your inner anger become a positive rather than a negative, but most of all, have fun. (Yeah, like that’s something you know how to do.)
The Snark Handbook: Overused Buzzwords, Hackneyed Phrases, and Other Misuses of the English Language
by Lawrence DorfmanCLICHÉ: nounEtymology: French, literally, printer's stereotype, from past participle of clichér, to stereotype, of imitative originDate: 18921 : a trite phrase or expression; also : the idea expressed by it2 : a hackneyed theme, characterization, or situation3 : something that has become overly familiar or commonplace In the words of Stephen Fry, "It is a cliché that most clichés are true, but then like most clichés, that cliché is untrue." Clichés are like rationalizations: try going a week without using one. It can't be done! They are the hobgoblin of little minds. For most of us, once you begin to take notice, they are fingernails on a chalkboard.From Shakespeare to Shakira; in music, on television, at the movies; in the boardroom, on a conference call, online or in person, clichés have taken over the world. While some nitwits might say they're just misunderstood, they didn't start out that way. There was a time when they were new and vibrant, clever and pithy. Now they're just predictable--a vapid collection of much-too-familiar descriptions or metaphors that often replace smart conversation, speech, or writing.This book is a collection of the most overused phrases of all time. Hopefully, it'll make you laugh. Hopefully, it'll make them think. And at the end of the day, if the early bird catches the worm and the slow and steady win the race . . . Please . . . kill . . . me . . . now.
The Snark Handbook: Politics and Government Edition (Snark Series)
by Lawrence DorfmanAnother political year is upon us . . . a year in which we elect another useless figurehead to piss off the masses, confuse the classes, and, above all, reward the jackasses. It will be a time of fear, angst, and anger, the perfect moment for The Snark Handbook: Politics and Government Edition. Filled with quotes, jokes, and timeless snarks, this brave foray into the political theater, old and new, will serve as a priceless source of sanity as you navigate the asylum. In the same inimitable style as the previous bestselling Snark titles, this timely entry is guaranteed to amuse and entertain. The wit and humor of Lawrence Dorfman shines in this collection, where he highlights the ineptitude and malice that is American democracy. You'll see first-hand the shenanigans that started with our Founding Fathers and still continue bravely on today. Hail to the Chief!
The Snark Handbook: Insult Edition (Snark Series)
by Lawrence DorfmanAuthor Lawrence Dorfman claims: "I love it when someone insults me. That means that I don't have to be nice anymore." In this latest incarnation of his bestselling series, Dorfman is in delicious form, dishing it out without any real consequences. The sharp-witted buyer (and that's you, my friend) may be wondering right about now: "Hey, how is this book any different from the first? That was full of insults, too." Yes, but these insults are different, and the author's retorts and taunts are so much more vitriolic than in the previous book. Readers will find more material to actually use in day-to-day life, including streamlined instructions on when and how to mock your peers; how to use retorts with your spouse and children; and how our late, great ancestors used insults throughout history. This is not a mere collection of quotations. Dorfman speaks directly to his audience, serving as teacher, ringleader, and historian. After all, not all insults are snarky, and not all snark is insulting. It takes a certain genius to define and navigate the fine line between idiotic commentary and intelligent snark, a genius that has been isolated and packaged with aplomb in the new Snark Handbook: Insult Edition.
The Snark Handbook: Sarcasm, Bitterness, and the Holiday Season (Snark Series)
by Lawrence DorfmanBah! Humbug! It&’s that time of year again….Time to spend too much, drink too much, eat too much, smile falsely, dig down deep to try and find &“good cheer,&” battle crowds, try to find parking in over-crowded lots, ignore surly clerks, bartenders, waiters, valets, and parking lot attendants, all in the pursuit of that moment of happiness known throughout the world as…dun, dun, dun: the Holidays. Has there ever been a time more suited to tapping into snark? With commentary, jokes, and quotes regarding Thanksgiving, Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanza, New Year&’s; on bad presents, worse in-laws, horrible children, and much more glorious excess. Enjoy such rotten sugar plums as: • &“Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people once a year.&”—Victor Borge • &“If someone screws up on their gift, there are seven more days to correct it...No awkward explanations of virgin birth...No Irving Berlin songs.&”—Among the Top Ten Reasons to Love Hanukkah • &“What I don&’t like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day.&”—Phyllis DillerThe Snark Handbook: Christmas Edition is destined to be a holiday classic.
Snarky As F*ck: A Sassy, Irreverant Guide for Dealing with People's Bullsh*t
by Lawrence DorfmanLearn how to become the most glorious a**shole the world has ever seen. Are you tired of everyone&’s bullsh*t? Responding to their dumba** questions? Making boring small talk and offering robotic replies? Can&’t take one more monotonous, people-pleasing conversation with a distant family member or a friend&’s friend? If you have no f*cks left to give and want to dish out some serious snark, grab a copy Snarky as F*ck, the premiere guide to all things sarcastic and sardonic. Explore topics such as: Sex and Romance (Responses to D*ck Pics, Mansplaining, and More) Geography (Snarkiest States in the US!) 21st Century Snark (Curse Word Definitions, Inspirational Bullsh*t, etc.) In the Workplace (Snarky Replies, Sotto Voce Things to Say to Your Boss) Family, Friends, and other Influencers (Greeting Cards for Bastards, and Insults for Around the Dinner Table!) Movies, Television, and Music (&“I&’m clapping because it&’s finished, not because I like it.&”) Politics and Government (Presidential Insults and Your New Favorite Game: Match the Scandal!) In the News (Florida Man, Karen and Brad, Idiots on Wheels, et al) Hear wit, sarcasm, and offhanded comments from masters like Dorothy Parker, Groucho Marx, H. L. Mencken, Oscar Wilde, Robert Benchley, George Bernard Shaw, Jules Feiffer, Bill Hicks, Bill Maher, Phyllis Diller, Édith Piaf, W. C. Fields, Mark Twain, Voltaire, Charles Bukowski, to name a few. This lofty tome promises to fulfill the need to chuckle, guffaw, titter, groan, and belly laugh as readers dip in and out of the great minds in literature, comedy, movies, music, and more. Proceed with caution, but know you&’ll come out the other side one snarky motherf*cker, ready to take on the world, one idiot at a time.
Snarky Sharky
by Bethan ClarkeA hilarious picture book for children ages 3-7 that's filled with quick wit, puns, and the antics of a brilliantly-snarky main character, Snarky Sharky.While most of the fish in the ocean are small fry, Snarky Sharky rules. But life in his underwater home is starting to annoy him. He is convinced that the dolphins are chirpy &“on porpoise&” to get on his nerves...and that the sea stars are &“always missing the point.&” One day, he decides to leave the reef and strike out on his own. Will he find something bigger and better? Readers will giggle at Snarky Sharky&’s quick wit, puns, and hilarious facial expressions, all the while absorbing the gentle lessons of learning to be humble and appreciating what you have.
Snatched (The Bloodwater Mysteries)
by Pete Hautman Mary LogueFrom award-winning author Pete Hautman and Mary Logue comes a lively mystery series. When high school student Alicia Camden suddenly disappears, the small town of Bloodwater is in shock. And it's up to Roni Delicata, reporter for the school's Bloodwater Pump, and her brilliant sidekick, Brian Bain, to figure out what's going on. With suspects all around them and suspicions high, Roni and Brian risk their lives -- and a few groundings from their parents -- to get to the bottom of things. But can they find Alicia and solve the mystery before it's too late? Full of suspense and humor, readers will love to watch the hilarious relationship between Roni and Brian as they save the day.
Snatched from Earth
by Bruce CovilleTim Tomkins has always wanted to visit outer space -- but he didn't plan to go as the captive of a mysterious alien! But that's just what Tim, Pleskit, Maktel, and Linnsy have become -- captives in an interstellar struggle for control of the galaxy. Can four kids from two very different planets learn to work together? They're going to have to, if they want to survive on the strange new world where they've been trapped. But even if they do survive, how will they ever find their way back home? Join Pleskit and his friends for a race against time and incredible danger -- with the fate of the galaxy hanging in the balance!
Snatched from Earth (Sixth-Grade Alien #8)
by Bruce CovilleTim and Pleskit are abducted in this eighth book in the hilarious, fast-paced, and accessible sci-fi series Sixth Grade Alien from the bestselling author of Aliens Ate My Homework and My Teacher Is an Alien, Bruce Coville.Tim Tompkins has always wanted to visit outer space—though he didn&’t plan to go as a captive of a mysterious alien! But that&’s just what Tim, Pleskit, Maktel, and Linnsy have become: captives in an interstellar struggle for control of the galaxy. Can four kids from two very different planets learn to work together? They&’re going to have to if they want to survive on the strange new world where they&’ve been trapped. But even if they can stay safe, how will the ever find their way back home?
Snazzy Cat Capers: Meow or Never (Snazzy Cat Capers Ser. #3)
by Deanna KentOphelia von Hairball V, the world’s #1 cat burglar, is ready to make hiss-tory with her latest and greatest heist in Deanna Kent's third book of this cat-tastic middle grade series, featuring black-and-white illustrations on almost every page by Neil Hooson!Ophelia and her inventor sidekick Oscar F. Gold are deep in preparations for the biggest challenge the FFBI (Furry Feline Burglary Institute) has to offer: The M.E.O.W. competition!The fur-and-fin duo show up with the most valuable treasure they can find—and Ophelia’s cousin Pierre von Rascal beats them to the punch with a priceless painting that puts their loot to shame. But Ophelia is certain the expensive artwork is an elaborate fake!Ophelia will need every pawful of her singular style, winning wit, and purr-fect poise to prove Pierre’s nothing but a wannabe cheetah—before he steals her prize!Adventure, heists, and teamwork abound in this fun, witty chapter book series brimming with cat-tastic black-and-white illustrations, including graphic novel-style pages!Check out the whole Snazzy Cat Capers series!Snazzy Cat CapersSnazzy Cat Capers: The Fast and the FurriestSnazzy Cat Capers: Meow or NeverAn Imprint Book“Fabulous, funny, and fin-tastic fun!”—Mo O’Hara, New York Times-bestselling author of My Big Fat Zombie Goldfish
Snazzy Cat Capers (Snazzy Cat Capers Ser. #1)
by Deanna Kent"I want to be Ophelia when I grow up!! And I want Oscar to be my BFF—Best Fishy Friend! Snazzy Cat Capers is fabulous, funny and fin-tastic fun with illustrations that pounce off the page."—Mo O’Hara, New York Times bestselling author of the My Big Fat Zombie Goldfish seriesLife is short. Diamonds are fur-ever.Internationally famous cat burglar Ophelia von Hairball V adores jewels—the only thing she loves more is a challenge. She's never met a safe she couldn't crack.Now the Furry Feline Burglary Institute (FFBI) offers her the ultimate caper: steal the giant Himalayan diamond and win their top award!There's a catch! The FFBI sends an enthusiastic inventor to help Ophelia...but this cat works alone, and Oscar Fishgerald Gold smells fishy.Can the smartest, stealthiest, and snazziest of cats learn to work with a fintastic sidekick and prove she's still the world's most purr-fect burglar?Adventure, heists, and teamwork abound in this fun, witty middle grade series brimming with cat-tastic black-and-white illustrations.Includes graphic novel-style pages!This book has Common Core connections.Check out the whole Snazzy Cat Capers series!Snazzy Cat CapersSnazzy Cat Capers: The Fast and the FurriestAn Imprint Book
Snazzy Cat Capers: The Fast and the Furriest (Snazzy Cat Capers Ser. #2)
by Deanna Kent"I want to be Ophelia when I grow up!! And I want Oscar to be my BFF—Best Fishy Friend! Snazzy Cat Capers is fabulous, funny and fin-tastic fun with illustrations that pounce off the page."—Mo O’Hara, New York Times bestselling author of the My Big Fat Zombie Goldfish seriesSave the world. Live to tell the tail.Ophelia von Hairball V of Burglaria, international kitty of mystery, is always fishing for a new mission im-paws-ible.So when a thief steals a dangerous artifact from its vault, the Furry Feline Burglary Institute (FFBI) puts Ophelia in charge of stealing it back.But when the cat’s away, the dogs will play. The Central Canine Intelligence Agency (CCIA) is hot on her tail—and they want the artifact for themselves!She’ll need some dashing disguises, great gadgets, and even a robo-dog to save the world in style!Adventure, heists, and teamwork abound in this fun, young middle grade series brimming with cat-tastic black-and-white illustrations by Deanna Kent with illustrations from Neil Hooson. Includes graphic novel-style pages by illustrator Neil Hooson. This book has Common Core connections.Check out the whole Snazzy Cat Capers series!Snazzy Cat CapersSnazzy Cat Capers: The Fast and the FurriestAn Imprint Book