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Three Men in a Boat (To Say Nothing of the Dog): A Novel
by Jerome K. JeromeOne of the best-loved and most entertaining comic novels ever penned, Three Men in a Boat has been a classic since it was first published in 1889. J., George, and Harris (not forgetting Montmorency, the mischievous, irascible fox terrier)—our young heroes—take a boating holiday along the Thames. Their aim is to escape the weary work-a-day world and improve their health, but they are ill prepared for the various escapades, difficulties and vicissitudes that they encounter along the watery way. The adventures of these incompetent innocents abroad are magnified to epic proportions by the storyteller, J., whose narration gives the book not only a wonderful endearing freshness but also a series of hilarious moments of timeless comedy. Penguin Random House Canada is proud to bring you classic works of literature in e-book form, with the highest quality production values. Find more today and rediscover books you never knew you loved.
Three Men on a Diet: A Very English Approach to Losing Weight
by George Courtauld'An excellent stocking filler' SpectatorThree Men on a Diet is the very funny and brutally honest story of three mighty men with nothing to gain and so much to lose: a diet book with a difference.Three Men on a Diet is the story of George, Reggie and Sebastian, three middle-aged friends and food- and drink-lovers, learning how to lower their calorie intake without losing their joie de vivre.Determined to improve his looks and health before it's too late (and after being told that he looked like a pregnant bulldog), Reggie persuades the others to join him on a five-month quest to shed three stone. Each has his own degree of cynicism, commitment and willingness to compromise on breakfast, parties and alcohol.Amidst the bewildering array of information on offer (what is a carb? What is saturated fat? How many units in a bottle of wine?), together they learn how to navigate stumbling blocks such as mayonnaise, chocolate and cheese, and support each other through fortnightly weigh-ins and varied levels of success with the Fast Diet, the Atkins Diet and others. At the very least, they hope to give up snoring and rekindle their love lives.Join the trio on their journey as they learn the truth about dieting. This hilarious and realistic guide rips up the rule books: it is an anti-diet book for those who enjoy the finer things in life.
Three Men on a Plane
by Mavis CheekA single mom finds her romantic life is up in the air—and getting turbulent—in this “intelligent, hard-nosed comedy” (The Observer). Pamela Pryor is free. Her son has, at last, left home. Her business is thriving. But she’s feeling strangely restless, and there’s the small matter of the missing Mr. Right. There have been three significant men in her life: her ex-husband, Peter; Douglas, the style guru turned perfect post-divorce romance; and Dean, the younger man as wildly handsome as he is completely inappropriate. All three are suddenly back in Pamela’s life and, as luck and air travel would have it, about to board the same flight. Pamela felt she was ready for a new man, but not three, not now . . . and not on one plane. “An ingenious story-line affording ample scope for the sly humor at which Mavis Cheek excels.” —The Observer “A marvellous writer whose characters are beautifully drawn, whose observations on the absurd behavior of the middle aged invariably hit the mark and who makes you laugh out loud.” —Daily Mail
The Three Ninja Pigs
by Corey Rosen SchwartzPractice makes perfect in this kick-butt fractured fairy tale. Why does this wolf think he can come to town and blow all the houses down? These three little pigs just aren't going to take it from that bully anymore! The first starts aikido lessons---he'll make mincemeat out of that wolf! His brother learns a little jujitsu--he'll chop that guy to pieces! But when the wolf actually appears, it turs out these two pigs aren't quite ready after all. Good thing their sister has been training every day to master some serious karate moves that save the day. KIYA! Corey Rosen Schwartz serves up a fun combination of smart-aleck dialogue and tongue-in-cheek rhymes that'll have kids howling, and rising star Dan Santat's spunky illustrations are sure to pack a punch!
Three of Diamonds (Diamond Brothers Omnibus)
by Anthony HorowitzWhat would Tim Diamond, the world's worst private detective, dowithout his quick-thinking brother Nick? The bumbling detective and his kid brother are at it again in these three hilarious, fast-paced mysteries. Whether it's finding out who flattened a philanthropist with a steamroller in The Blurred Man, outsmarting Parisian drug smugglers on a vacation gone miserably wrong in The French Confection, or catching the murderer behind a deadly class reunion in I Know What You Did Last Wednesday, there's never a dull moment with this crimesolving duo around. Find out if Nick can get to the bottom of these mysteries before Tim messes everything up, or worse, gets them both killed.
Three Pickled Herrings: The Detective Agency's Second Case (The Fairy Detective Agency #2)
by Sally GardnerAt the Wings & Co. Fairy Detective Agency, Emily Vole and her friends are beginning to worry. It's five months since their official opening and they still haven't had one case. Then local landowner Sir Walter Cross dies suddenly and mysteriously. The detectives suspect fairy meddling. And when Mr Rollo the tailor mysteriously loses everything and Pan Smith's wedding plans are ruined the night before her big day, they're convinced there must be magic at play. Now they have not one, but three pickled herrings to deal with! Can they solve the mystery of who is stealing people's luck before the meddling fairy goes too far?Read by Simon Russell Beale. Simon Russell Beale has starred on stage, screen and TV and has been described as one of the greatest stage actors of his generation. He has been in numerous roles for The Royal Shakespeare Company and has won the Lawrence Olivier Theatre Award 3 times. In 2003 he was appointed a CBE. In 2008 Simon made his début as a television presenter, fronting the BBC Four series Sacred Music with Harry Christophers. He has read numerous audiobooks including Orion's Don't Cook Cinderella by Francesca Simon.(P)2004 Orion Publishing Group.Ltd
The Three Pigs
by David WiesnerWinner of the 2002 Caldecott Medal This picture book begins placidly (and familiarly) enough, with three pigs collecting materials and going off to build houses of straw, sticks, and bricks. But the wolf&’s huffing and puffing blows the first pig right out of the story . . . and into the realm of pure imagination. The transition signals the start of a freewheeling adventure with characteristic David Wiesner effects—cinematic flow, astonishing shifts of perspective, and sly humor, as well as episodes of flight. Satisfying both as a story and as an exploration of the nature of story, The Three Pigs takes visual narrative to a new level. Dialogue balloons, text excerpts, and a wide variety of illustration styles guide the reader through a dazzling fantasy universe to the surprising and happy ending. Fans of Tuesday&’s frogs and Sector 7&’s clouds will be captivated by old friends—the Three Pigs of nursery fame and their companions—in a new guise.
Three Rotten Eggs (Hamlet Chronicles #5)
by Gregory MaguireThe students of Miss Earth's class in rural Vermont experience an eventful spring when they become involved with a bullying new student, a competitive egg hunt, and genetically altered chicks.
Three Score and Ten (The Barsetshire Novels)
by Angela ThirkellBarsetshire gathers to celebrate a milestone birthday at the Old Bank House in this conclusion to the much-loved, long-running series.A home is saved from destruction, a budding romance takes steps toward the altar, a doctor experiences the return of a former love—and the fine people of Barsetshire make plans for a festive extravaganza to mark Mrs. Morland’s seventieth birthday . . . “Triumphantly completed” by Angela Thirkell’s close friend C. A. Lejeune after Thirkell’s death, Three Score and Ten features a host of new and old friends from the author’s acclaimed series spanning decades of English country life (The New York Times). “Her writing celebrates the solid parochial English virtues of stiff-upper-lippery, good-sportingness, dislike of fuss, and low-key irony. . . . Light, witty, easygoing books.” —The New Yorker“Where Trollope would have been content to arouse a chuckle, [Thirkell] is constantly provoking us to hilarious laughter. . . . To read her is to get the feeling of knowing Barsetshire folk as well as if one had been born and bred in the county.” —Kirkus Reviews
Three Shrinking Tales: A Matter-of-Fact Magic Collection by Ruth Chew
by Ruth ChewFor decades, Ruth Chew's classic chapter books full of everyday magic have enchanted early readers. Now a new generation can fall under her spell and fall in love with reading. This e-collection turns tiny magic into big surprises! In Do-It-Yourself Magic, a special "Build Anything" kit makes imagined settings come to life. In Earthstar Magic, a slow summer turns upside down when a clumsy witch's spells go awry. And in Mostly Magic, enchanted objects lead two siblings and a mysterious cat into a series of miniature adventures. "Ruth Chew's classic books capture the joy of everyday magic." -- Mary Pope Osborne, author of the Magic Tree House series
The Three Silly Girls Grubb
by John HassettSkippity-skip-skip. One after the other, three silly sisters skip over a bridge on their way to school. But before she can cross to safety, each sister must face Ugly-Boy Bobby, a bully who hides in a hole beneath the bridge. Ugly-Boy Bobby was "the kind of boy who ate bugs, tossed stones at cats, and drank from puddles-the muddier the better. ” But even a boy like Bobby hungers for something other than bugs and mud puddles from time to time. What he craves the most are jelly donuts, the very ones each sister carries in her lunch! Just when it seems that Ugly-Boy Bobby will stop at nothing to get those donuts, the biggest sister turns the tables on him with just one simple, little request . . . Zany illustrations, full of fun details to discover, enliven this humorous take on the classic children’s story, "The Three Billy Goats Gruff. ”
Three Things About Emmy Crawford
by Allison L. BitzIn this coming-of-age novel perfect for fans of Lynn Painter and Rebecca Lynn Solomon, nothing can derail Emmy Crawford, the type-A daughter of a senator, from relentlessly pursuing her dreams—not Crohn’s disease, the paparazzi, or even heartbreak. "Emotional, sweet, and ridiculously swoony, this book is a must-read." —Lynn Painter, New York Times Bestselling Author of Better Than the MoviesThere are three things high school senior Emmy Crawford will accomplish, no matter what: Taking Nationals in debate this season.Shielding her sister, Issy, from anything that could hurt her, especially her anxiety.Representing her family well, since her mom may be the next president.And nothing can get in Emmy's way. Not Crohn’s disease, even if her gut has been acting up. Not the paparazzi, who snap any photos they can get of the daughters of a presidential candidate. And definitely not her feelings for Gabe Castillo, the only debater in DC who stands a chance at beating her—and who she used to be on secret kissing terms with, before he ghosted her. When Gabe unexpectedly returns to the debate scene and Issy starts crushing on him, Emmy works harder than ever to keep her eyes on winning and off her aching heart and body, because the alternative means losing the three things that matter most.
Three Times A Day, Doctor (The Dr Clifford Chronicles)
by Dr Robert CliffordThree Times a Day, Doctor? combines the first three books in this humorous and heartwarming doctor series: Just Here Doctor; Not There Doctor; and What Next, Doctor? Together the paint a richly entertaining portrait of life in a small West Country community as seen through the eyes of its G.P.We read of the time he rode off on a horse to tend to a hunting casualty - and rode back in an ambulance as the casualty; of the craziest, most drunken rugby tour of France ever undertaken; of the pregnant woman whose X-rays revealed a medical phenomenon; of the elderly couple who turned out to be mother and son - the son being eighty-one . . .Teeming with colourful places and curious characters, by turns comic, dramatic and tragic, these tales provide an immensely entertaining slice of life delivered with a warmth and humour that will make them a real delight to read.
Three Times Lucky (Mo & Dale Mysteries #1)
by Sheila TurnageRising sixth grader Miss Moses LoBeau lives in the small town of Tupelo Landing, NC, where everyone's business is fair game and no secret is sacred. She washed ashore in a hurricane eleven years ago, and she's been making waves ever since. Although Mo hopes someday to find her "upstream mother," she's found a home with the Colonel--a café owner with a forgotten past of his own--and Miss Lana, the fabulous café hostess. She will protect those she loves with every bit of her strong will and tough attitude. So when a lawman comes to town asking about a murder, Mo and her best friend, Dale Earnhardt Johnson III, set out to uncover the truth in hopes of saving the only family Mo has ever known. <P><P> Full of wisdom, humor, and grit, this timeless yarn will melt the heart of even the sternest Yankee.<P> Newbery Medal Honor book
Three To Get Deadly (Stephanie Plum #3)
by Janet EvanovichStephanie Plum, the brassy babe in the powder blue Buick is back and she's having a bad hair day - for the whole month of January. She's been given the unpopular task of finding Mo Bedemier, Trenton's most beloved citizen, arrested for carrying concealed, gone no-show for his court appearance. And to make matters worse, she's got Lula, a former hooker turned file clerk - now a wannabe bounty hunter - at her side, sticking like glue. Lula's big and blonde and black and itching to get the chance to lock up a crook in the trunk of her car. Morelli, the New Jersey vice cop with the slow-burning smile that undermines a girl's strongest resolve is being polite. So what does this mean? Has he found a new love? Or is he manipulating Steph, using her in his police investigation, counting on her unmanageable curiosity and competitive Jersey attitude? Once again, the entire One for the Money crew is in action, including Ranger and Grandma Mazur, searching for Mo, tripping down a trail littered with dead drug dealers, leading Stephanie to suspect Mo has traded his ice-cream scoop for a vigilante gun. Cursed with a disastrous new hair color and an increasing sense that it's really time to get a new job, Stephanie spirals and tumbles through Three to Get Deadly with all the wisecracks and pace her fans have come to expect.
Three Weeks with a Princess (The Improper Princesses #2)
by Vanessa KellyIn Vanessa Kelly’s captivating series, three young women are descended from royalty—in the most improper way. But that doesn’t stop them from pursuing lives rich in adventure. . .Lia Kincaid, illegitimate daughter of the Duke of York, comes from a long line of notorious women. Raised by her grandmother, formerly mistress to the late Marquess of Lendale, she has little hope of a respectable marriage. But the new marquess, her childhood friend, Jack Easton, would make a very desirable protector . . . if he weren’t too honorable to take her to bed.It’s bad enough being saddled with a title he never desired. Now Jack must resist the beautiful woman he desires far too much. Duty calls, and he is duty-bound to choose a wealthy bride. But then Lia makes another outrageous suggestion: asking Jack to devise some tests to find her the perfect paramour. Tests that involve flirting, kissing, and other pleasurable pursuits. Tests that, in a matter of weeks, could transform friendship into the ton’s greatest scandal, igniting a passion even duty can’t deny. . .
Three Wishing Tales: A Matter-of-Fact Magic Collection by Ruth Chew
by Ruth ChewFor decades, Ruth Chew's chapter books about matter-of-fact magic have enchanted early readers. Now a new generation of fantasy fans can discover the magic in these Stepping Stones books.What should be in a book about magic? Pirates? Merlin? Becoming tiny? Time travel? A giant? How about all of the above? In The Wishing Tree, The Magic Coin, and The Magic Cave, magical adventures lie around every corner. From a coin that becomes a boat and a backyard pool that becomes an ocean, to a cave that leads to another land, it's anchors away to fun!Ruth Chew has a remarkable way of turning the average day into a fantastic voyage. Here are three of her best tales that will capture the imagination of any reader who is willing to take a little risk.
Three Witch Tales: A Matter-of-Fact Magic Collection by Ruth Chew
by Ruth Chew"Ruth Chew's classic books perfectly capture the joy of everyday magic."--Mary Pope Osborne, bestselling author of the Magic Tree House seriesRuth Chew's chapter books are full of simple, matter-of-fact magic that's sure to enchant budding fantasy readers.Did that cat just talk to me? Did that button just move? Is that flower petal flying? In Witch's Cat,The Witch's Buttons, and The Witch's Garden, children learn lots of things about magic . . . from traveling to the time of knights and ladies, to shrinking to the size of a blade of grass. Magic is fun, but it's also hard, and there always seem to be consequences. Ruth Chew's children loved stories about witches, and she figured that other children would love them too . . . and they do. Here are three of her best, each full of fanciful fun and magical mayhem.
Three's a Crowd (CatKid)
by Brian JamesCatKid is super excited to meet Kristie, the new girl in school. CatKid's best friend Maddie has been chosen to show the new girl around -- and best friends share everything, right? Wrong! CatKid thinks the new girl is trying to steal Maddie away so she tries to find an even better best friend. When the new girl has a birthday party, CatKid can't wait to go so she can show off her new best friend in front of Maddie! But when the plan backfires, can CatKid and Maddie become best friends again? It'll take one cool cat to prove that friendship is forever.
Three's A Crowd: 'If ever a book was a mood-lifter, it's this one. I cried laughing!' MILLY JOHNSON
by Simon BookerA FATHER. HIS SON. ONE MASSIVE MISUNDERSTANDING. 'If ever a book was a mood-lifter, it&’s this one. Full of caustic wit, I cried laughing!' MILLY JOHNSON, Sunday Times bestselling author 'Smart, clever and engaging - the perfect &‘what-if&’ novel' PENNY PARKES 'What a treat this novel is! Compulsively readable, and with surprising twists and turns right to the end. And who knew that such a nightmarish situation could be so funny?' DEBORAH MOGGACH 'Fun, fresh and endlessly entertaining!' HEIDI SWAIN, Sunday Times bestselling author 'A witty twisty romp that leaps from the page. Perfect for lifting the spirits' FANNY BLAKE 'Funny, sad, uplifting and clever - pure escapism!' SUSI HOLLIDAY &‘An absolute romp that managed to be sharp, funny and tender all at once – I loved it&’ LAURA BAMBREY &’What an incredible read - tender, engrossing and extremely funny. I was laughing from the first page!' LISA CUTTS &‘A beautifully executed, laugh-out-loud ride through the complex fluctuations of a father/son relationship and an unwittingly shared love interest&’ OLIVIA LICHTENSTEIN &‘I can&’t begin to tell you how much I loved this funny, clever and surprisingly touching novel. Pitch perfect, it had me howling with laughter from beginning to end&’ HOLLY MARTIN 'Punchy and pacey, witty and engaging with entertainment by the bucketload. I absolutely LOVED it' KIM NASH 'A fresh funny and modern take on the romcom' CLAIRE McGOWAN A hilariously laugh out loud, romantic comedy, perfect for fans of Something to Live For (Richard Roper), Love, Unscripted (Owen Nicholls), The Love Square (Laura Jane Williams), and Us (David Nicholls).?What happens when an estranged father and son unwittingly fall in love with the same woman? Out-of-work actor Harriet is recuperating from a crash-and-burn affair with Damian – aka &‘Cockweasel&’ – and making ends meet as a barista when she meets two rather lovely men. Tom is a regular at the café, and seems like such a nice guy. Smooth-talking DJ Richard is older, but in great shape – a real silver fox. Deciding to take a chance on both of them, Harriet doesn&’t realise at first that she is actually dating father and son. Tom and Richard aren&’t on speaking terms, and don&’t share a last name – so how was she to know? By the time everyone finds out, both Tom and Richard are truly madly deeply in love with Harriet, and she&’s faced with an impossible choice. But as the battle for her affections intensifies, &‘Cockweasel&’ makes an unexpected reappearance and begs her to give him another chance…
Thrice Upon a Marigold: A Royal Kidnapping Caper (Upon a Marigold #3)
by Jean FerrisPrincess Poppy, the bouncing baby daughter of Queen Marigold and King Christian of Zandelphia-Beaurivage, is in terrible danger. The kingdom's former torturer-in-chief and poisoner-in-chief have joined forces to kidnap the baby as an act of revenge for their exile! Can a ragtag parade of rescuers--including the king and queen, the evil kidnappers' mortified children, five dogs, a white elephant, and a washed-up wizard--save Princess Poppy in time?
The Thrifty Guide to Ancient Greece: A Handbook for Time Travelers (The Thrifty Guides #3)
by Jonathan W. StokesThe only guidebook you need for your next time travel vacation!The Thrifty Guide to the Ancient Greece: A Handbook for Time Travelers is a snappy, informative travel guide containing information vital to the sensible time traveler: * How can I find a decent tunic that won't break my bank account? * Where can I score cheap theater tickets in ancient Athens? * What do I do if I'm being attacked by an army of one million Persians?This two-color book is filled with humorous maps, reviews of places to stay and top attractions (Don't miss the first-ever Olympics!), and tips on who to have lunch with (Alexander the Great and his horse, Bucephalus, naturally). If you had a time travel machine and could take a vacation anywhere in history, this is the only guidebook you would need.
The Thrifty Guide to Ancient Rome: A Handbook for Time Travelers (The Thrifty Guides #1)
by Jonathan W. StokesFrom the publishing house that brought you the Who Was? books comes the next big series to make history approachable, engaging, and funny!The Thrifty Guide to Ancient Rome contains information vital to the sensible time traveler: • Where can I find a decent hotel room in ancient Rome for under five sesterces a day? Is horse parking included? • What do I do if I’m attacked by barbarians? • What are my legal options if I’m fed to the lions at the Colosseum? All this is answered and more. There is handy advice on finding the best picnicking spots to watch Julius Caesar’s assassination at the Roman Forum in 44 BC, as well as helpful real estate tips to profit from the great Roman fire of AD 64. There are even useful recommendations on which famous historical figures to meet for lunch, and a few nifty pointers on how to avoid being poisoned, beheaded, or torn apart by an angry mob. If you had a time travel machine and could take a vacation anywhere in history, this is the only guidebook you would need!
The Thrifty Guide to Medieval Times: A Handbook for Time Travelers (The Thrifty Guides)
by Jonathan W. StokesThe kid-friendly series that makes history approachable, engaging, and funny! From the publishing house that brought you the Who Was? books.The Thrifty Guide to Medieval Times: A Handbook for Time Travelers is a snappy, informative, illustrated travel guide with everything the sensible time traveler needs to know, like: * Where I can find the best hovel? * What are my healthcare options if I catch the Black Plague? * How can I avoid being attacked by pillaging Huns? * And most importantly, why on earth would anyone want to travel back to medieval times?This book is designed as a parody of Fodor's guides, complete with humorous maps, reviews of places to stay and top attractions (don't miss a jousting tournament . . . but watch out for lances!), and tips on whom to have lunch with (murderous Queen Olga of Kiev, naturally--just don't eat or drink anything around her!). If you had a time travel machine and could take a vacation anywhere in history, this is the only guidebook series you would need.