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The Navy's Night Before Christmas: Read & Listen Edition
by Christine Ford Trish HollandThis story, written for military families, is about a visit from &“the Santa of Sailors&” to those who can&’t be home for Christmas. &’Twas the night before Christmas, when way out to sea Not a creature was stirring to windward or lee. The sailors were nestled all snug in their racks Like orders of pancakes, so tight were the stacks. One Christmas Eve out at sea, some homesick sailors are paid a visit by Master Chief Claus, the Santa of Sailors. This lively and poignant tale was inspired by Clement C. Moore&’s classic yuletide poem.This Read & Listen edition contains audio narration.
The Nearly-Wed Handbook
by Dan ZevinTogether you've entered a strange new world of deranged caterers, militant photographers, and prima donna florists. You find yourselves incapable of discussing anything non-nuptial, and you won't rest until you've registered for those perfect pewter grape scissors. Are the two of you going nuts? Nope, you're just planning a wedding..."If you're caught up in the furor of planning a wedding, Nearly Wed could help you maintain a sense of humor long enough to at least have one." -Entertainment Weekly, Erik EsckilsenDan Zevin's latest book is Dan Gets a Minivan: Life at the Intersection of Dude and Dad (Scribner, 2012), which has been optioned by Adam Sandler's Happy Madison Productions along with his previous book, The Day I Turned Uncool. A finalist for the Thurber Prize for American Humor, Dan has followed his readers through each phase of life, from post-college coping (Entry-Level Life) to tying the knot (The Nearly-wed Handbook) to developing a disturbing new interest in lawn care and wine tastings (Uncool). And that was all before he had kids. Which leads us back to this minivan situation.Dan has been a comic commentator for NPR, a humor columnist for The New York Times, and a contributor to print and digital publications including Rolling Stone, The New Yorker, Maxim, Details, Real Simple, and Parents. He also wrote an original sitcom pilot for CBS and Warner Brothers. His latest project is Star Vehicle, a YouTube talk show he hosts inside his minivan.Dan lives with his wife, kids, and pet rabbit in the suburbs of New York, where he has become an active member of his local Costco.
The Nearly-Weds: The Sunday Times bestselling enemies to lovers, grumpy boss, romcom - the perfect laugh out loud spring read
by Jane CostelloRNA Romantic Comedy Novel of the Year Award winner! After being dumped on her wedding day, Zoe jumps on a plane to Boston, USA, to find work as a nanny and leave the drama at home in England behind her. She&’s finds two lovely kids but a hellish boss in dad Ryan, who is so wrapped up in grief after the death of their mom that he barely registers their existence. But as Zoe attempts to inject some fun back into the children&’s lives – and remind handsome, broken Ryan where his priorities lie – she glimpses a side of him that is entirely unexpected. She&’s no Mary Poppins. He&’s no Employer of the Year. With the stakes so high, will they ever start to understand each other? The Sunday Times bestselling enemies to lovers, grumpy boss, romcom - the perfect laugh out loud spring read. &‘Heart-warming and hilarious - the funniest novel we&’ve read in years&’ Heat
The Necronomnomnom: A Cookbook Of Eldritch Horror
by Red Duke Games, LLC Mike SlaterA Lovecraft-inspired cookbook with recipes to whet your appetite and threaten your sanity Reading about the slime- covered, non- Euclidean ruins of the sunken city of R’lyeh or the squamous, tentacled deity who slumbers there would make anyone hungry. Starting with the puns and working from there, authors Mike Slater and Thomas Roache have summoned forth 50 funny, bizarre, and horrible dishes such as: • The Deep Fried Deep One • Nog Sothoth • Cthus-Koos • The Great Old Buns • The Gin and Miskatonic Like H. P. Lovecraft’s Necronomicon, the legendary and forbidden book of the dead that is “alien to all sane and balanced readers,” this cookbook contains many dark (but still delicious) secrets within its pages. The book comes infested with sanity- melting and mouth- watering illustrations, as well as annotations full of crazed discoveries and desperate warnings about the recipes that brave readers will undertake.
The Neddiad: How Neddie Took the Train, Went to Hollywood, and Saved Civilization
by Daniel PinkwaterWhen shoelace heir Neddie Wentworthstein and his family take the train from Chicago to Los Angeles in the 1940s, he winds up in possession of a valuable Indian turtle artifact whose owner is supposed to be able to prevent the impending destruction of the world, but he is not sure exactly how.
The Neddiad: How Neddie Took the Train, Went to Hollywood, and Saved Civilization
by Daniel PinkwaterBestselling author Daniel Pinkwater's story of how Neddie, a shaman, a ghost, three pals, and a maneuver known as the French substitution determine the fate of the world.Melvin the Shaman. Sandor Eucalyptus. Billy the Phantom Bellboy. Daniel Pinkwater's weird and wonderful tale of Neddie Wentworthstein's quest to save civilization features some of the most unique heroes and villains a reader could hope to meet. Despite the heavy responsibility that Neddie must carry (not every kid is charged with rescuing humankind from doom), his story is hilarious, warm, welcoming, and sweet.
The Negro Grandsons of Vercingetorix (Global African Voices Ser.)
by Alain MabanckouThe award-winning author of Black Moses is at his satiric best in this novel the catalogs the pain and suffering caused by the ravages of civil war.Set in the imaginary African Republic of Vietongo, The Negro Grandsons of Vercingetorix begins when conflict breaks out between rival leaders and the regional ethnic groups they represent. Events recorded in a series of notebooks under the watchful eye of Hortense Lloki show how civil war culminates in a series of outlandish actions perpetrated by the warring parties’ private militias—the Anacondas and the Romans from the North who have seized power against Vercingetorix (named after none other than the legendary Gallic warrior who fought against Caesar’s army) and his Little Negro Grandsons in the South who are eager to regain control. Translated into English for the first time, this novel provides a gritty slice of life in an active war zone.“Nearly twenty years removed from its French publication, Mabanckou’s aptitude for characterization and his unflinching glimpse of plight echo within every movement of Vercingetorix . . . With The Negro Grandsons of Vercingetorix, Mabanckou stresses that even as violence is an accomplice to life, perseverance is synonymous.” —World Literature Today
The Neighbor Favor
by Kristina ForestA shy bookworm enlists her charming neighbor to help her score a date, not knowing he&’s the obscure author she&’s been corresponding with, in this sparkling and heart-fluttering romance by Kristina Forest.Shy, bookish, and admittedly awkward, Lily Greene has always felt inadequate compared to the rest of her accomplished family, who strive for Black excellence. She dreams of becoming a children&’s books editor, but she&’s been frustratingly stuck in the nonfiction division for years without a promotion in sight. Lily finds escapism in her correspondences with her favorite fantasy author, and what begins as two lonely people connecting over email turns into a tentative friendship and possibly something else Lily won&’t let herself entertain—until he ghosts her without a word. Months later, Lily is still crushed, but she&’s determined to get a hold of her life, starting with finding a date to her sister&’s wedding. And the perfect person to help her is Nick Brown, her charming, attractive new neighbor, who she feels drawn to for reasons she can&’t explain. But little does she know, Nick is an author—her favorite fantasy author. Nick, who has his reasons for using a pen name and pushing people away, soon realizes that the beautiful, quiet girl from down the hall is the same Lily he fell in love with over email months ago. Unwilling to complicate things even more between them, he agrees to set her up with someone else, though this simple favor between two neighbors is anything but—not when he can't get her off his mind...
The Neil Gaiman Reader: Selected Fiction
by Neil Gaiman'This collection is [like] the Beatles' "White Album": massive in size and scope, with individually brilliant pieces presented together because the only context they need is how good they are' MARLON JAMESA captivating collection of fiction from one of the world's most beloved writers, introduced with a foreword by Booker Prize-winning author, Marlon James.With a writer as prolific as Neil Gaiman, where do you begin? Or how do you know what to try next? Spanning his career to date, this collection of ambitious, groundbreaking and endlessly imaginative fiction will be your guide.Curated within this book are nearly fifty of Gaiman's short stories and novellas, interposed with excerpts from his five novels for adults - Neverwhere, Stardust, American Gods, Anansi Boys and The Ocean at the End of the Lane.It is both an entryway to his oeuvre and a literary trove Gaiman fans old and new will return to time and again. Start where it suits you. There aren't any rules.NEIL GAIMAN.WITH STORIES COME POSSIBILITIES.(P)2020 HarperAudio
The Neonatal Doc's Baby Surprise: The perfect read for Mother's Day! (Miracles in the Making #2)
by Susan CarlisleFrom temporary fling……to baby bump!Labor and delivery nurse Amanda is in Sydney for work, not to be distracted by “the baby whisperer”—neonatal specialist Dr. Lucius West. But Amanda loves a challenge—especially an intriguing, handsome one. Their fiery clashes in the OR soon turn into passion in the bedroom. But there are consequences to Amanda and Lucius’s insatiable desire…and they’ll have nine months to face them!A Miracles in the Making novelMiracles in the Making duetBook 1 — Risking Her Heart on the Single Dad by Annie O’NeilBook 2 — The Neonatal Doc’s Baby Surprise “With its interesting setting, original characters, and very engrossing storyline, Highland Doc’s Christmas Rescue is constantly engaging…a highly entertaining medical romance that will long be remembered.”—Goodreads“I absolutely love Ms. Carlisle’s writing style. It’s sublime and every book I’ve read by her has been captivating, fast-paced, filled with wonderful characters that have kept me entertained from start to finish…. Really, right from the beginning of this story I was completely hooked….”—Harlequin Junkie on The Sheikh Doc’s Marriage Bargain
The Nerdiest, Wimpiest, Dorkiest I Funny Ever (I Funny #6)
by James Patterson Chris GrabensteinEverybody's favorite kid comic, Jamie Grimm, is out to conquer the world--with laughter, of course!Comedian Jamie Grimm can't help feeling like he's reached the top--he has his own smash hit TV show and he's won a national funny-kid competition. But now he's taking his fame and fortune to international levels by competing in the upcoming world kid comic contest! Will Jamie prove that he's the funniest kid on earth--or does he stand (or sit!) to lose his crown?
The Nerdist Way: How to Reach the Next Level (In Real Life)
by Chris HardwickWELCOME YOUR NEW NERD OVERLORD Attention, Nerds: You don't have to be a stereotypical geekwad to appreciate the tenets of Nerdism and to make your innate talents for over-analysis and hyper-self-awareness work for you instead of agin you. Join Nerd superstar Chris Hardwick as he offers his fellow "creative-obsessives" the crucial information needed to come out on top in the current Nerd uprising. As a lifelong member of "The Nerd Herd," Chris Hardwick has learned all there is to know about Nerds. He's studied them, lived with them, and has endeavored to milk their knowledge nectar and isolate its curative powers for what ails you. Thus, he has founded a philosophical system (and blog) called The Nerdist, and here he shares his hard-earned wisdom about turning seeming weaknesses into world-dominating strengths. From keeping your heart rate below hummingbird levels to ignoring your brain, Hardwick reveals the secrets that can help you accomplish what you want by tapping into your true nerdtastic self. Remember, success is the most satisfying--and legal--form of vengeance there is. And you can achieve it...when you follow the Nerdist Way.
The Nerdy Dozen
by Jeff MillerWhen Neil Andertol and a motley crew of video-gaming whizzes accidentally download top-secret training software and are recruited by the military to restore a botched aircraft mission, they're no longer playing for points--they're playing to save the world! Part action movie, part slapstick comedy, debut author Jeff Miller's Nerdy Dozen is a madcap adventure for the middle grade set.
The Nerdy Dozen #2: Close Encounters of the Nerd Kind
by Jeff MillerIn this exciting sequel to The Nerdy Dozen, Neil Andertol and his gang of dorky gamers are once again called on to fly a top-secret mission--one that is literally out of this world. This time, rescuing mankind means heading into outer space. A top-secret spacecraft has been stolen, and NASA needs the best pilots in the universe to get it back--the Nerdy Dozen. It's a race against time to stop an earth-shattering disaster. Can the twelve geeks save the day again--or will it be game over?
The Nerdy Dozen #3: 20,000 Nerds Under the Sea
by Jeff MillerCan the nerds handle the high seas? It's anchors aweigh for this motley crew of middle grade, video-gaming heroes. In the exciting third book of the Nerdy Dozen series, Neil Andertol and his friends are in for their toughest mission yet!Neil and his crew have reunited at Reboot Robiski's video-game convention in order to try the brand-new underwater game Captain Jolly's Shark Hunt. Except that their win only leads to trouble.Neil, Sam, and Biggs are captured by the real Captain Jolly, who needs their video-game skills so she can destroy the world. As they embark on an underwater adventure, can the Nerdy Dozen save the day before everything is KO'd?
The Nerviest Girl in the World
by Melissa WileyA feisty girl from a family of ranchers lands a job as a daredevil stunt girl in the early days of silent film in this adventurous and funny cross between Wild Hearts Can't Be Broken and Ramona.Pearl lives on a ranch where her chores include collecting eggs and feeding ornery ostriches. She has three older brothers, who don't coddle her at all. And she knows a thing or two about horses, too.One day, Pearl's brothers get cushy jobs doing stunts for this new form of entertainment called "moving pictures." They're the Daredevil Donnelly Brothers, a Death-Defying Cowboy Trio. Before she knows it, Pearl has stumbled into being a stunt girl herself--and dreams of becoming a star. The only problem is, her mother has no idea what she's up to. And let's just say she wouldn't be too happy to find out that Pearl's been jumping out of burning buildings in her spare time.Filled with action, humor, and heart--not to mention those pesky ostriches--The Nerviest Girl in the World introduces a spunky heroine whose adventures will have kids on the edge of their seats and whose sense of humor will have them laughing until the very last line.
The Neurotic Parent's Guide to College Admissions
by J. D. RothmanAdmissions rates of 6 percent? Kids applying to thirty-two colleges? Sixteen-year-olds with more impressive resumes than Fortune 500 CEOs? Has the nation lost its mind? Why yes, it has! J.D. Rothman, the Neurotic Parent of blog fame, takes readers on a hilarious satiric journey through today's insane college admissions process. The vividly illustrated book takes you from the Itsy-Bitsy Fiske Guide and Junior Kumon Tips for Preschoolers through Rejection Letters from the Heart and Bed Bath & Bye-Bye.
The New Adventures of Curious George
by Margret ReyThis collection includes eight full-length stories including Curious George Goes to a Chocolate Factory, Curious George and the Puppies, Curious George Makes Pancakes, Curious George Feeds the Animals, Curious George Goes to a Movie, Curious George and the Hot Air Balloon, Curious George in the Snow, and Curious George’s Dream.
The New Archies (Archie Graphic Novels #1)
by Archie SuperstarsTake a trip back in time to Riverdale Middle School with The New Archies! Archie, Betty, Veronica and the whole gang were just as goofy then as they are now as high school students! Can Ms. Grundy keep her class under control? Revisit these fun tales in this graphic novel collection featuring select stories.
The New Baby (9 Months Later)
by Brenda MottWhat they’ve both lostAmanda Kelly has come to Boone’s Crossing, Tennessee, to recover from the loss of her baby. She finds a kindred spirit in Ian Bonner, a man who, in his teens, gave up a son for adoption. Ian is so wonderful, so kind, so handsome, but Amanda won’t let herself get emotionally involved. Because the one thing he wants she can never give him-a baby.What they find-togetherWith a little luck and some hard work, Ian and Amanda find Ian’s son. Years of heartache disappear and Ian forges a new relationship with the boy. Their connection-their new family-warms Amanda to the core. Almost enough to crumble the protective barrier around her heart...
The New Blue Media: How Michael Moore, MoveOn.org, Jon Stewart and Company Are Transforming Progressive Politics
by Theodore HammA look at the journalists and satirists who&’ve helped transform the political landscape in the twenty-first century. The New Blue Media traces the rise during the Bush years of new media stars: the news-saturated satire of The Onion, The Daily Show, and The Colbert Report; the polemical assaults of Michael Moore and Air America; and the instant-messaging politics of MoveOn, Daily Kos, and the netroots. With the exception of Air America, all of these new media outlets have found commercial success—marking, says Hamm, a new era in liberal politics. Does this new media matter? In 2004, both Michael Moore and MoveOn became major players; more recently, the influence of the netroots has sparked upheaval and debate within the Democratic Party. The New Blue Media examines this phenomenon in depth, and the reshaping of both the style and the substance of progressivism.
The New Book of Snobs: A Definitive Guide to Modern Snobbery
by D.J. Taylor'Hugely enjoyable' AN Wilson, Sunday Times'Thoughtful, entertaining and enjoyable' Michael Gove, Book of the Week, The TimesInspired by William Makepeace Thackeray, the first great analyst of snobbery, and his trail-blazing The Book of Snobs (1848), D. J. Taylor brings us a field guide to the modern snob. Short of calling someone a racist or a paedophile, one of the worst charges you can lay at anybody's door in the early twenty-first century is to suggest that they happen to be a snob. But what constitutes snobbishness? Who are the snobs and where are they to be found? Are you a snob? Am I? What are the distinguishing marks? Snobbery is, in fact, one of the keys to contemporary British life, as vital to the backstreet family on benefits as the proprietor of the grandest stately home, and an essential element of their view of who of they are and what the world might be thought to owe them.The New Book of Snobs will take a marked interest in language, the vocabulary of snobbery - as exemplified in the 'U' and 'Non U' controversy of the 1950s - being a particular field in which the phenomenon consistently makes its presence felt, and alternate social analysis with sketches of groups and individuals on the Thackerayan principle. Prepare to meet the Political Snob, the City Snob, the Technology Snob, the Property Snob, the Rural Snob, the Literary Snob, the Working-class Snob, the Sporting Snob, the Popular Cultural Snob and the Food Snob.
The New Dad Dictionary: Everything He Really Needs to Know - from A to Z
by Chris IlluminatiParenting techniques and theories--on Dad's terms!Are you ready for cluster feedings and cradle cap? How about meconium and jaundice? With The New Dad Dictionary, you no longer have to page through parenting tomes to understand what everyone is talking about. From engorgement to independent play, author Chris Illuminati offers a crash course in today's parenting language, guiding you through the foreign territory of doctor visits, magazines, and conversations with Mom. Featuring hundreds of real-life explanations for popular words and phrases, each entry not only translates these textbook terms into plain English, but also teaches you what changes to expect from your baby--and Mom--during this time.So stop banging your head against the wall and discover everything you need to know about raising your child with The New Dad Dictionary!
The New Girl (Allie Finkle's Rules for Girls #2)
by Meg CabotAllie Finkle's starting her first day of school at Pine Heights Elementary! Plus, she's getting a new kitten, the first pick of show cat Lady Serena Archibald's litter! <p><p> But being the New Girl is turning out to be scary, too, especially since one of the girls in Allie's new class, Rosemary, doesn't like her. In fact, Rosemary says she's going to beat Allie up after school. <p><p> Everyone seems to have an opinion on how Allie should handle the situation. How can Allie tell who's right? Who knew it was going to be so hard being the New Girl?
The New Girl: A Graphic Novel (New Girl Ser.)
by Cassandra CalinInstagram sensation and Tapas webcomic superstar Cassandra Calin makes her long-form debut with this funny, feel-good middle-grade graphic novel about change.Goodbye, old life...Lia and her family are waiting to board a flight across the Atlantic, leaving behind family, friends, and Romania -- the only home Lia has ever known. But Lia's heartache is overshadowed by the discomfort of her first period. As if things weren't difficult enough! Now Lia is thrust into a world where everything is different: her home, her language, and even her body. With so many changes happening at once, Lia struggles with schoolwork, has trouble communicating with classmates, and has no idea how to manage her unpleasant periods. Will she ever feel like herself again?Inspired by the author's own immigration experience, The New Girl is a comically charming story about change and acceptance.