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Tales from a Not-So-Dorky Drama Queen (Dork Diaries #9)
by Rachel RussellNikki Maxwell's worst nightmare comes true in book nine of the #1 New York Times bestselling Dork Diaries series!A certain member of the CCP girls Dork fans know all about has gotten her hands on Nikki's diary and has decided to share some thoughts of her own...Find out what happens when Nikki's worst nightmare becomes a reality. Welcome to Mackenzie's world!!
Tales from a Not-So-Friendly Frenemy: Tales from a Not-So-Friendly Frenemy (Dork Diaries #11)
by Rachel Renée Russell<P>It's a frenemy showdown in the eleventh installment in the blockbuster #1 New York Times bestselling Dork Diaries series! <P>Nikki Maxwell has the worst luck. Of all the schools she could have been assigned to for the student exchange week program, she's stuck at North Hampton Hills, her arch nemesis MacKenzie Hollister's new school. Even worse, there might just be someone at NHH who can out-MacKenzie MacKenzie! At least Nikki can write about every moment of drama in her diary, so readers won't miss a moment of it. Can the queen of dorks survive a week at the head CCP's new school or will it be a dorky disaster?
Tales from a Not-So-Glam TV Star: Tales from a Not-So-Glam TV Star (Dork Diaries #7)
by Rachel RussellEveryone's been rooting for Nikki Maxwell and her crush, Brandon--and fans will finally learn if they had their first kiss in this seventh book of the New York Times bestselling Dork Diaries series!Nikki's juggling a lot this month. A reality TV crew is following Nikki and her friends as they record their hit song together, plus there are voice lessons, dance practice, and little sister Brianna's latest wacky hijinks. Nikki's sure she can handle everything, but will all the excitement cause new problems for Nikki and Brandon, now that cameras are everywhere Nikki goes? The Dork Diaries series has more than 13 million copies in print worldwide!
Tales from a Not-So-Happy Heartbreaker: Tales from a Not-So-Happy Heartbreaker (Dork Diaries #6)
by Rachel RussellLove--and crushes--are in the air for Nikki Maxwell in this sixth book of the New York Times bestselling Dork Diaries series.It's the biggest dance of the year and Nikki Maxwell is hoping her crush, Brandon, wants to be her date. But time is running out. What if he doesn't want to go with her? Or worse--what if he ends up going with Mackenzie?!! In the sixth book in the blockbuster Dork Diaries series--now with more than 8 million copies in print--join Nikki, Chloe and Zoey as they tackle the topic of love, Dork Diaries style!
Tales from a Not-So-Smart Miss Know-It-All: Tales from a Not-So-Smart Miss Know-It-All (Dork Diaries #5)
by Rachel RussellNikki Maxwell authors an advice column for the school newspaper in this fifth book of the New York Times bestselling Dork Diaries series.Nikki Maxwell develops a sudden interest in student journalism that may or may not (okay, definitely does) have to do with the fact that mean girl Mackenzie has started writing a gossip column. And there just might be some juicy info involving Nikki's crush, Brandon, that Nikki doesn't want Mackenzie reporting to the world. So Nikki joins the school newspaper staff--and ends up as an advice columnist! It's fun at first, answering other kids' letters. But when Miss Know-It-All's inbox is suddenly overflowing with pleas for guidance, Nikki feels in need of some help herself. Fortunately she has BFFs Chloe and Zoey on her side--and at her keyboard!
Tales From a West Australian Cop
by Bob MacdonaldReal life police drama is okay...but true stories of police emergencies that make you laugh out loud--as well as shudder--are better! Experience what it's like to be involved in a high-speed car chase. Learn how to cope with the stress of telling someone of the death of a loved one. What is life like on a remote Australian desert aboriginal community? How do police deal with tribal 'pay-back' spearing incidents? Experience the anguish of working in a war zone...and why controlling your imagination is so crucial, when you find yourself alone facing a deranged man armed with a weapon. Stare death in the face at the hands of drunken or drug crazed people...and live to tell the tale. Laughter helps the mind, heals the body and is a critical survival tool for all who work on the frontline of death, dying and disaster. Take a peek inside this diary of a West Australian Police Officer who knows that it's okay to laugh at yourself and the world around you. A natural storyteller, Bob MacDonald's writing is refreshing and makes easy reading. MacDonald spent thirty years serving as a police officer; working his way through the ranks--from a raw recruit through to a commissioned officer attached to the Internal Investigation Branch of the Professional Standards Portfolio. His duties included time with the United Nations Civilian Police blue beret peacekeepers, based on the island nation of Cyprus during the Greek/Turkish conflict, as well as extensive service in Australian outback locations; Papua New Guinea and North Solomon Islands.
Tales From A Honeymoon Hotel: Number 3 in Series
by Sheila Olivia RyanThree newly-wed couples. Three honeymoons. One hotel. And the ultimate question: will true love really conquer all? Hotel Angelo, Croatia. Offers temptingly romantic views, unexpected exes and some serious doubts after 'I Do' Gemma and Andy Collins are childhood sweethearts and madly in love. Gemma is determined to have the perfect honeymoon after their perfect wedding - except that nothing seems to be going to plan. Soon she discovers that they are not the only honeymooners at the hotel, nor the only ones with a secret lying between them . . .Jo and Mark Weston, a young couple who should have stars in their eyes, seem oddly subdued - and strangely matched, while older couple Ruby and Harold Dimmock are finally free to enjoy their lives together, but guilty consciences cast a shadow on their golden years. Over their holiday, all three couples will discover that an immediate post-wedding happy-ever-after is not always guaranteed, but also that true love is worth fighting for . . .
Tales From A Honeymoon Hotel: a warm and witty holiday read about life after 'I Do' (Honeymoon)
by Sheila Norton Ryan)'An addictive summer read' Closer - 4* Three newly-wed couples. Three honeymoons. One hotel. And the ultimate question: will true love really conquer all?Hotel Angelo, Croatia. Offers temptingly romantic views, unexpected exes and some serious doubts after 'I Do' Gemma and Andy Collins are childhood sweethearts and madly in love. Gemma is determined to have the perfect honeymoon after their perfect wedding - except that nothing seems to be going to plan. Soon she discovers that they are not the only honeymooners at the hotel, nor the only ones with a secret lying between them . . .Jo and Mark Weston, a young couple who should have stars in their eyes, seem oddly subdued - and strangely matched, while older couple Ruby and Harold Dimmock are finally free to enjoy their lives together, but guilty consciences cast a shadow on their golden years. Over their holiday, all three couples will discover that an immediate post-wedding happy-ever-after is not always guaranteed, but also that true love is worth fighting for . . .Praise for Sheila Norton (writing as Olivia Ryan): 'Like a good cappuccino, there's more to this book than just an enjoyable, witty read' Katie Fforde'This is a delightful novel that many women will relate to' Woman's Weekly Fiction Special
Tales From A Not-So-Perfect Pet Sitter (Dork Diaries #10)
by Rachel Renée RussellNikki and her friends Brandon, Chloe, and Zoey are teamed up on an important mission in the tenth book in the #1 New York Times bestselling Dork Diaries series. Nikki has to hide seven ADORKABLE puppies from two parents, one nosy little sister, an entire middle school, and…one mean girl out for revenge, MacKenzie Hollister. If anyone can do it, it’s Nikki…but not without some hilarious challenges along the way!
Tales from Outer Suburbia
by Shaun TanBreathtakingly illustrated and hauntingly written, Tales from Outer Suburbia is by turns hilarious and poignant, perceptive and goofy. Through a series of captivating and sophisticated illustrated stories, Tan explores the precious strangeness of our existence. He gives us a portrait of modern suburban existence filtered through a wickedly Monty Pythonesque lens. Whether it’s discovering that the world really does stop at the end of the city’s map book, or a family’s lesson in tolerance through an alien cultural exchange student, Tan’s deft, sweet social satire brings us face-to-face with the humor and absurdity of modern life.
Tales from the Back Row: An Outsider's View from Inside the Fashion Industry
by Amy OdellA keenly observed collection of personal essays about what it’s like to be a young woman working in the fashion industry, Amy Odell’s Tales from the Back Row offers “a backstage pass to the intimidating, backbiting industry” (US Weekly).In the “funny, insightful” (Harper’s Bazaar) Tales from the Back Row, Cosmopolitan.com editor Amy Odell takes readers behind the stage of New York’s hottest fashion shows to meet the world’s most influential models, designers, celebrities, editors, and photographers. But first, she has to push her way through the crowds outside and weave her way through the packed venue, from the very back row to the front. And as Amy climbs the ladder (with tips about how you can, too), she introduces an industry powered by larger-than-life characters: she meets the intimidating Anna Wintour and the surprisingly gracious Rachel Zoe, not to mention the hilarious Chelsea Handler, and more. As she describes the allure of Alexander Wang’s ripped tights and Marchesa’s Oscar-worthy dresses, Amy layers in something else: how the fashion industry is an exaggerated mirror of human fallibility—reflecting our desperate desire to belong, to make a mark. In her “light-hearted, cocktail-hour confession from someone who is…sober enough to recognize insanity for what it is” (The Washington Post), Amy is the first to admit that as much as she is embarrassed by the thrill she gets when she receives an invitation to an exclusive after-party, she can’t help but RSVP “yes.” Welcome to the weird and wonderful world of high fashion: “Whether you’re interested in pursuing a career in publishing, public relations, or design, or you’re just fascinated with what really goes on behind-the-scenes without the usual sugarcoating, we’d say this is required reading” (Fashionista.com).
Tales from the Brothers Grimm and the Sisters Weird
by Vivian Vande VeldePresents thirteen twisted versions of such familiar fairy tales as Red Riding Hood, Jack and the Beanstalk, Hansel and Gretel, and the Three Billy Goats Gruff.
Tales from the Crib: Adventures of an Over-sharing, Stressed-Out, Modern-Day Mom
by Deedee FiliatreaultTales from the Crib will make all parental units feel better about themselves-no vegetables required.Let's be honest. Nobody wants to sit next to that chipper mom at playgroup who knows everything. Please. You want to plop down by the mom who's just as clueless and cranky as you are and have a good, hearty, conspiratorial laugh together. Because that mom gets it. That mom makes you feel better. That mom isn't afraid to admit that chicken nuggets are one of her household's major food groups (though she is fraught with guilt over it). That mom is just like you.That mom is DeeDee Filiatreault-a regular housewife with fairly normal kids (if there is such a thing). But unlike you, she writes all her ridiculous family stuff down (for her newspaper column and blog) with wit, snark, heart, faith, and far fewer swear words than she's probably thinking. Her writings have yet to appear in the New Yorker or HuffPo, she doesn't go on morning shows to dole out parenting advice (mainly because she doesn't really have any), and she doesn't have a weird, new hook for a "mom-oir"-like how she survived a year of family dumpster-diving or co-parenting her children with wolves. She doesn't have eighteen kids either, just two. And oh yeah, only one husband (as required by state law).This collection of DeeDee's favorite columns and writings spans her first near-decade in the mom business. Reading it is like plunking down next to that funny mom at playgroup. You'll laugh. You'll cry. You'll feel less lonely in this thing. And you may even feel a little superior. (That alone might be worth the price tag.) Just come and sit down next to her.
Tales from the Dugout: 1,001 Humorous, Inspirational and Wild Anecdotes from Minor League Baseball
by Tim HagertyA wild bull on the field, a fly ball caught by a train conductor, a pitcher taking the mound barefoot—Minor League Baseball has been played across the country in cities large and small for more than a century, and there are thousands of entertaining and improbable stories to tell from it.Join professional baseball broadcaster Tim Hagerty for a journey through the zaniest Minor League stories in Tales from the Dugout. Given its long history, it is no surprise that the game has encountered some bizarre things over the years. This humorous and outlandish collection of stories is sourced from newspaper archives and the Baseball Hall of Fame Library in Cooperstown, New York, and includes a foreword by former MLB All-Star Billy Butler. Whether you're a baseball fanatic or just a fan of sports history, this book captures the spirit of the game.This compendium of minor league shenanigans includes:HOLE IN ONE: In 1942, a Milwaukee Brewers batter hit a low line drive that bounced down the right field line. He rounded the bases while confused Louisville Colonels fielders searched for the ball. They eventually found it inside a gopher hole.MONKEYING AROUND: A chimp's escape turned a Southern Association game into pandemonium on July 17, 1909. "Henry the Chimpanzee," the New Orleans Pelicans' official mascot, busted from his cage and chased players around the field. The chimp then went after fans, who ran from him screaming. The game was delayed a few minutes while Henry was restrained.HEADLESS CRUSHER: A police department in Ohio got a call about a missing head. The Lake Erie Crushers' mascot's head was stolen in 2011, forcing the mascot to miss a few home games. After learning through media reports that police were investigating, the thief returned the head by inconspicuously placing it under the ballpark's tarp.
Tales from the Dyke Side
by Jorjet HarperFrom the Table of Contents: Breakfast Cereal Monogamy Sex in monogamous relationships has a finite shelf life. If the Shoe Fits Was Cinderella a broom-closet Lesbian? Northern Exposure Is Santa Claus a very special fairy? Animal Crackers Coming out to mom-a long process. Going by the Book Halloween costumes and gays in the Bible. When reading this book, be prepared to laugh--out loud--and to think; to ponder and to enjoy.
Tales from the Land of Ooo
by Stephen Reed Max BrallierTales from the Land of Ooo takes the reader on a unique journey into the world of Adventure Time in this 64-page collection of original, off-the-wall short stories featuring full-color illustrations and a flexi-bound cover.
Tales from the Teachers' Lounge: What I Learned in School the Second Time Around -- One Man's Irreverent Look at Being a Teacher Today
by Robert WilderFrom the critically acclaimed author of "Daddy Needs a Drink" comes a series of irreverent, wickedly observant essays about what it really means to be a teacher today. By turns heartwarming, eye-opening, and uproariously funny, these pitch-perfect essays offer priceless lessons in life.
Tales from the Trails
by T. Duren JonesT. Duren Jones gets out into the wilderness as often as possible—camping, fishing, hiking, desert trail trekking and &“bagging&” peaks—and does he have stories to tell! He&’s hiked hundreds of trails, completed the nearly 500 miles of the Colorado Trail, and has summited all 54 of Colorado&’s 14,000-ft peaks. He loves the outdoors—and check-off lists. He&’s kinda crazy that way. He&’ll often drag friends and family on his wilderness quests...and most of them have survived his escapades. Tales from the Trails—part adventure journal, part travelogue, part motivational encouragement, part stand-up comedy—includes 26 mostly-true outdoor stories from trails and climbs around the American West. This book is for anyone who loves spending time in the outdoors, who wish they could be outdoors more, or who simply enjoy reading about other nuts who spend time outdoors.
Tales from the Treehouse: Too Silly to Be Told . . . Until NOW! (The Treehouse Books)
by null Andy GriffithsInternational author-illustrator superstar duo Andy Griffiths and Terry Denton are back, and this time they've cooked up a hilarious book of 13 standalone stories to complement their beloved chapter book series. A lot of stuff happens in our ever-expanding treehouse.Not everything gets into the books.These are some other things that happened to us…Surreal, funny and supremely silly—all with the spirit of the Treehouse—come on up to hear some Tales from the Treehouse.
Tales from the Vulgar Unicorn: Thieves' World, Tales From The Vulgar Unicorn, And Shadows Of Sanctuary (Thieves' World® #2)
by Joe Haldeman John Brunner Philip José FarmerBelly up to Thieves&’ World®&’s favorite bar for tales told by such fantasy stars as Philip José Farmer, David Drake, Janet Morris, and others. In the second shared-world anthology of the Thieves&’ World® series, we see &“the gods themselves taking a hand in the fight for the hearts, minds and souls of the citizens of Sanctuary&” (Fantasy-Faction). Via contributions from Philip José Farmer, David Drake, Lynn Abbey, A.E. van Vogt, Janet Morris, Andrew J. Offutt, and Robert Lynn Asprin, you&’ll revisit the nefarious characters of Sanctuary, including One-Thumb, the proprietor of the Vulgar Unicorn; Regli, a nobleman; Illyra, the seer; Hanes, the thief; the crime lord, Jubal; and introducing Tempus Thales, the immortal mercenary. &“It&’s the best kind of sequel, the kind which was not meticulously planned from the start, unlike the deliberate megafranchises being created today, which may be plotted out for a decade in advance of the launch. . . . An important book in the series . . . Many elements which will be exploited to huge degree and cast a huge shadow over later pages are introduced here for the first time. . . . In some ways, it provides an anticipatory, even direct, model for the grimdark of the nineties which would follow.&” —World of Antra
Tales From Tiger Bay
by Alexander CordellThe people who inhabited the dockland area of Cardiff, know as Tiger Bay,have engraved their personalities on the very air of Bute Street and, under Alexander Cordell's vivid pen, the streets are crammed again with everycreed and nationality; from priests and nuns to dockers and drunks; boxers,rugby fanatics, concubines and Bute Street ladies. The place comes alive in all its bawdy strength and colour.
Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing (Fudge Ser. #1)
by Judy BlumeLiving with his little brother, Fudge, makes Peter Hatcher feel like a fourth grade nothing. Whether Fudge is throwing a temper tantrum in a shoe store, smearing smashed potatoes on walls at Hamburger Heaven, or scribbling all over Peter's homework, he's never far from trouble. He's a two-year-old terror who gets away with everything—and Peter's had enough. When Fudge walks off with Dribble, Peter's pet turtle, it's the last straw. Peter has put up with Fudge too long. How can he get his parents to pay attention to him for a change?
Tales of a Pet Vet: Stories from the Clinic and House Calls
by Dr. Dawn FilosIn stories tailor-made for pet lovers, a seasoned veterinarian shares her good, bad, and messy days on the job—and highlights the undeniable magic of the human-animal bond.Dr. Dawn Filos has always had a passion for animals—and with a lot of hard work and perseverance, she turned that passion into a career. Here, with emotional honesty, Dr. Dawn shares her colorful, memorable journey from nervous novice to seasoned, self-assured doctor. This modern-day James Herriot ultimately finds her niche as a house-call vet, where she creates a way to practice on her own terms with the privilege of unique, intimate access into the homes and lives of her beloved patients and their human families. Sometimes heartwarming, sometimes sad, and often hilarious, Tales of a Pet Vet will resonate deeply with pet lovers everywhere.
Tales of Bunjitsu Bunny (Bunjitsu Bunny Ser. #1)
by John HimmelmanIntroducing Isabel, aka Bunjitsu Bunny! She is the BEST bunjitsu artist in her school, and she can throw farther, kick higher, and hit harder than anyone else! But she never hurts another creature . . . unless she has to. This series of brief stories about Isabel's adventures are a beguiling combination of child-friendly scenarios and Eastern wisdom perfect for the youngest readers.
The Tales of Marigold: Once Upon a Marigold, Twice Upon a Marigold, Thrice Upon a Marigold (Upon a Marigold)
by Jean FerrisThe acclaimed Marigold series in one volume. &“A mixture of fantasy, romance, comedy, and coming-of-age . . . and it&’s all great fun.&” —School Library Journal Once upon a Marigold, a fairy tale turned upside down, inside out, and completely over the top! Join Christian and Marigold through their one-of-a-kind adventures in this trilogy of tales that&’s part comedy, part love story, part everything-but-the-kitchen-sink. With echoes of William Goldman&’s modern classic The Princess Bride, Jean Ferris&’s hilarious parody of &“Once upon a time . . .&” overflows with oddball characters and sage observations to create a happily-ever-after that&’s just the beginning. Once Upon a Marigold was named an ALA Notable Children&’s Book, an ALA Best Book for Young Adults, and a New York Public Library 100 Books for Reading and Sharing title. Praise for the Marigold series &“In a gratifying fantasy that contains elements of classic fairy tales, Ferris breathes new life into archetypal characters by adding unexpected and often humorous dimensions to their personalities.&” —Publishers Weekly &“Cold indeed is the heart not made warm by this bubbly fairy-tale romance.&” —Kirkus Reviews &“Ferris leisurely combines elements of adventure, fantasy, romance, and humor.&” —Booklist &“An upbeat fairy-tale adventure.&” —School Library Journal