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The Self-Preservation Society
by Kate HarrisonFrom the bestselling author of THE STARTER MARRIAGE and BROWN OWL'S GUIDE TO LIFE - a brilliantly entertaining novel about one woman's mission to go from cowardly to courageous...Staying alive in the 21st century is a full-time job - one which self-confessed scaredycat Jo Morgan takes very seriously indeed. As a little girl growing up near Greenham Common Air Base, she stockpiled baked beans in case of nuclear holocaust; now she works in accident prevention, trying to protect the rest of us from conker injuries, killer tea-cosies and death by chocolate. But she's happy - well, as happy as anyone can be in these dangerous times. Fortunately her boyfriend shares her outlook on life, so everything they do together involves the minimum possible risk. From their social lives to their sex lives, spontaneity is not in their vocabulary. Yet when Jo survives a hit and run accident, she realises she's beaten the odds. Maybe a bit of living dangerously is just what Jo needs. But un-learning a lifetime of fears and phobias won't be easy. Jo has a choice: she can carry on living half a life, or leave behind the people she loves. It's the scariest decision she'll ever have to make...
The Self-Preservation Society
by Kate HarrisonFrom the bestselling author of THE STARTER MARRIAGE and BROWN OWL'S GUIDE TO LIFE - a brilliantly entertaining novel about one woman's mission to go from cowardly to courageous...Staying alive in the 21st century is a full-time job - one which self-confessed scaredycat Jo Morgan takes very seriously indeed. As a little girl growing up near Greenham Common Air Base, she stockpiled baked beans in case of nuclear holocaust; now she works in accident prevention, trying to protect the rest of us from conker injuries, killer tea-cosies and death by chocolate. But she's happy - well, as happy as anyone can be in these dangerous times. Fortunately her boyfriend shares her outlook on life, so everything they do together involves the minimum possible risk. From their social lives to their sex lives, spontaneity is not in their vocabulary. Yet when Jo survives a hit and run accident, she realises she's beaten the odds. Maybe a bit of living dangerously is just what Jo needs. But un-learning a lifetime of fears and phobias won't be easy. Jo has a choice: she can carry on living half a life, or leave behind the people she loves. It's the scariest decision she'll ever have to make...
The Sellamillion
by Adam RobertsTHE SELLAMILLION is NOT a parody of Tolkien's THE SILMARILLION. That would be pointless because although all Tolkien fans have a copy, only three of them have read past page 40.It is, however, a parody of all that Tolkien created as he worked on LORD OF THE RINGS. The history of the elderly days. Early missing drafts of LORD OF THE RINGS. A correspondence between the author and publisher on whether it should be a Bellybutton Stud of Doom rather than a Ring of Power. An experimental version of LOTR as if written by Dr Seuss.That sort of thing. It'll be funny. Possibly hilarious. The author's told us it will be. Promised even. And he did write THE SODDIT. And that was quite funny.
The Sellamillion
by Adam RobertsTHE SELLAMILLION is NOT a parody of Tolkien's THE SILMARILLION. That would be pointless because although all Tolkien fans have a copy, only three of them have read past page 40.It is, however, a parody of all that Tolkien created as he worked on LORD OF THE RINGS. The history of the elderly days. Early missing drafts of LORD OF THE RINGS. A correspondence between the author and publisher on whether it should be a Bellybutton Stud of Doom rather than a Ring of Power. An experimental version of LOTR as if written by Dr Seuss.That sort of thing. It'll be funny. Possibly hilarious. The author's told us it will be. Promised even. And he did write THE SODDIT. And that was quite funny.
The Sellout
by Paul Beatty<P>A biting satire about a young man's isolated upbringing and the race trial that sends him to the Supreme Court, Paul Beatty's The Sellout showcases a comic genius at the top of his game. It challenges the sacred tenets of the United States Constitution, urban life, the civil rights movement, the father-son relationship, and the holy grail of racial equality―the black Chinese restaurant.<P> Born in the "agrarian ghetto" of Dickens―on the southern outskirts of Los Angeles―the narrator of The Sellout resigns himself to the fate of lower-middle-class Californians: "I'd die in the same bedroom I'd grown up in, looking up at the cracks in the stucco ceiling that've been there since '68 quake." Raised by a single father, a controversial sociologist, he spent his childhood as the subject in racially charged psychological studies. He is led to believe that his father's pioneering work will result in a memoir that will solve his family's financial woes. But when his father is killed in a police shoot-out, he realizes there never was a memoir. All that's left is the bill for a drive-thru funeral.<P> Fuelled by this deceit and the general disrepair of his hometown, the narrator sets out to right another wrong: Dickens has literally been removed from the map to save California from further embarrassment. Enlisting the help of the town's most famous resident―the last surviving Little Rascal, Hominy Jenkins―he initiates the most outrageous action conceivable: reinstating slavery and segregating the local high school, which lands him in the Supreme Court.<P> <P><b>Winner of the 2015 National Book Critics Circle Award in Fiction <P>Named one of the best books of 2015 by The New York Times Book Review and the Wall Street Journal <P>Winner of the Man Booker Prize<br> <P>Winner of the National Book Critics Circle Award in Fiction <P>Winner of the John Dos Passos Prize for Literature <P>A New York Times Bestseller <P>Los Angeles Times Bestseller <P>Named One of the 10 Best Books of the Year by The New York Times Book Review <P>Named a Best Book of the Year by Newsweek, The Denver Post, BuzzFeed, Kirkus Reviews, and Publishers Weekly <P>Named a "Must-Read" by Flavorwire and New York Magazine's "Vulture" Blog</b>
The Sellout: A Novel
by Paul BeattyA biting satire about a young man's isolated upbringing and the race trial that sends him to the Supreme Court, Paul Beatty's The Sellout showcases a comic genius at the top of his game. It challenges the sacred tenets of the United States Constitution, urban life, the civil rights movement, the father-son relationship, and the holy grail of racial equality—the black Chinese restaurant. Born in the "agrarian ghetto" of Dickens—on the southern outskirts of Los Angeles—the narrator of The Sellout resigns himself to the fate of lower-middle-class Californians: "I'd die in the same bedroom I'd grown up in, looking up at the cracks in the stucco ceiling that've been there since '68 quake." Raised by a single father, a controversial sociologist, he spent his childhood as the subject in racially charged psychological studies. He is led to believe that his father's pioneering work will result in a memoir that will solve his family's financial woes. But when his father is killed in a police shoot-out, he realizes there never was a memoir. All that's left is the bill for a drive-thru funeral. Fueled by this deceit and the general disrepair of his hometown, the narrator sets out to right another wrong: Dickens has literally been removed from the map to save California from further embarrassment. Enlisting the help of the town's most famous resident—the last surviving Little Rascal, Hominy Jenkins—he initiates the most outrageous action conceivable: reinstating slavery and segregating the local high school, which lands him in the Supreme Court.
The Semi-Attached Couple
by Emily EdenThe worst thing to happen to the season’s perfect couple: marriage When the young and gorgeous Helen Eskdale met the wealthy aristocrat Lord Teviot, everything clicked. This was a couple that was meant to be—the match of the year, if not the ages. But in the rush to the altar, there was no time for bride and groom to actually get to know each other. Now the question is: Can they keep their marriage from falling apart?The Semi-Attached Couple explores the upstairs-downstairs intrigues and comic misunderstandings central to the classic English romance with all the wit, style, and charm of a Jane Austen novel. This ebook has been professionally proofread to ensure accuracy and readability on all devices.
The Senility of Vladimir P.: A Novel
by Michael HonigA biting satire of a particular despot and a haunting allegory of the fragility of goodness and the contagion of unchecked power. Set twenty-odd years from now, it opens on Patient Number One--Vladimir Putin, largely forgotten in his presidential dacha, serviced by a small coterie of house staff, drifting in and out of his memories of the past. His nurse, charged with the twenty-four-hour care of his patient, is blissfully unaware that his colleagues are using their various positions to skim money, in extraordinarily creative ways, from the top of their employer's seemingly inexhaustible riches. But when a family tragedy means that the nurse suddenly needs to find a fantastical sum of money fast, the dacha's chef lets him in on the secret world of backhanders and bribes going on around him, and opens his eyes to a brewing war between the staff and the new housekeeper, the ruthless new sheriff in town. A brilliantly cast modern-day Animal Farm, The Senility of Vladimir P. is a coruscating political fable that shows, through an honest man slipping his ethical moorings, how Putin has not only bankrupted his nation economically, but has also diminished it culturally and spiritually. It is angry, funny, page-turning, and surprisingly moving.
The Senses of Humor: Self and Laughter in Modern America
by Daniel WickbergWhy do modern Americans believe in something called a sense of humor, and how did they come to that belief? Daniel Wickberg traces the relatively short cultural history of the concept to its British origins as a way to explore new conceptions of the self and social order in modern America. More than simply the history of an idea, Wickberg's study provides new insights into a peculiarly modern cultural sensibility. The expression "sense of humor" was first coined in the 1840s, and the idea that such a sense was a personality trait to be valued developed only in the 1870s. What is the relationship between medieval humoral medicine and this distinctively modern idea of the sense of humor? What has it meant in the past 125 years to declare that someone lacks a sense of humor? Why do modern Americans say it is a good thing not to take oneself seriously? How is the joke, as a twentieth-century quasi-literary form, different from the traditional folktale? Wickberg addresses these questions among others and in the process uses the history of ideas to throw new light on the way contemporary Americans think and speak about humor and laughter. The context of Wickberg's analysis is Anglo-American; the specifically British meanings of humor and laughter from the sixteenth century forward provide the framework for understanding American cultural values in the nineteenth and twentieth centuries. The genealogy of the sense of humor is, like the study of keywords, an avenue into a significant aspect of the cultural history of modernity. Drawing on a wide range of sources and disciplinary perspectives, Wickberg's analysis challenges many of the prevailing views of modern American culture and suggests a new model for cultural historians.
The Serious Goose
by Jimmy KimmelMeet a very Serious Goose in late-night host Jimmy Kimmel's first fun and funny picture book! There is nothing silly about this goose. You CANNOT make her laugh, so DON'T EVEN TRY!Written, illustrated, and lettered by Jimmy Kimmel, this picture book challenges young readers to bring the silly out of a very Serious Goose. Inspired by Jimmy&’s nickname for his kids, The Serious Goose reminds us to be silly in a serious way. Challenge your little comedians to make this no-nonsense goose smile. This delightful read-aloud is guaranteed to create gaggles of giggles time and time again! Kimmel&’s proceeds from sales of THE SERIOUS GOOSE will be donated to Children&’s Hospital Los Angeles (CHLA) and children&’s hospitals around the country.
The Serpent of Venice: A Novel
by Christopher MooreVenice, a long time ago. Three prominent Venetians await their most loathsome and foul dinner guest, the erstwhile envoy from the Queen of Britain: the rascal-Fool Pocket.This trio of cunning plotters--the merchant, Antonio; the senator, Montressor Brabantio; and the naval officer, Iago--have lured Pocket to a dark dungeon, promising an evening of sprits and debauchery with a rare Amontillado sherry and Brabantio's beautiful daughter, Portia.But their invitation is, of course, bogus. The wine is drugged. The girl isn't even in the city limits. Desperate to rid themselves once and for all of the man who has consistently foiled their grand quest for power and wealth, they have lured him to his death. (How can such a small man, be such a huge obstacle?). But this Fool is no fool . . . and he's got more than a few tricks (and hand gestures) up his sleeve.Greed, revenge, deception, lust, and a giant (but lovable) sea monster combine to create another hilarious and bawdy tale from modern comic genius, Christopher Moore.
The Setup
by Lizzy DentFrom the author of The Summer Job comes a laugh-out-loud, heartwarming story about one woman&’s impulsive fib that jump starts a summer of reinvention and learning about love, life, and what it means to accept yourself. She has a plan. Fate has other ideas. The last place very average thirty-one-year-old Mara Williams thought she&’d be is on a solo vacation impersonating her fortune teller when she finally meets the one. Josef, a gorgeous Austrian cellist, sits down for a reading and before she knows it, she&’s telling him his destiny will be sitting in a pub in the English seaside town of Broadgate on the last Friday of August. And her name is Mara. Enter Project Mara: three months to turn herself into the stylish, confident woman she&’s always hoped to be. Meanwhile, the crumbling, formerly glamorous beachside pool club where she works is under threat and her eccentric colleagues enlist her help to save it, just as a handsome new housemate casts doubts on her ideas about &“the one.&” Can Mara pull off the transformation of a lifetime? And by summer&’s end, will she know who is her destiny?
The Seven Deadly Sins: Seven Scars They Left Behind (The\seven Deadly Sins Ser. #6)
by Nakaba Suzuki Shuka MatsudaThe Seven Deadly Sins—a legendary order that once served the Kingdom of Liones as the mightiest of its Holy Knights—stand accused of treason and have fled the realm. Princess Margaret and young Gilthunder, the slain commander Zaratras’ son, know the terrible truth about the betrayal but dare not speak of it, not even to each other.The aftermath of the event that shook Britannia comes to life in seven prose chapters that provide a superb introduction to the rich world of the original comic and satisfy longtime fans’ craving for more. Illustrated in a classic, warm style by the creator himself, Seven Scars They Left Behind walks the royal road of fantasy.
The Seven Good Years
by Etgar KeretA brilliant, life-affirming, and hilarious memoir from a "genius" (The New York Times) and master storyteller.The seven years between the birth of Etgar Keret's son and the death of his father were good years, though still full of reasons to worry. Lev is born in the midst of a terrorist attack. Etgar's father gets cancer. The threat of constant war looms over their home and permeates daily life.What emerges from this dark reality is a series of sublimely absurd ruminations on everything from Etgar's three-year-old son's impending military service to the terrorist mind-set behind Angry Birds. There's Lev's insistence that he is a cat, releasing him from any human responsibilities or rules. Etgar's siblings, all very different people who have chosen radically divergent paths in life, come together after his father's shivah to experience the grief and love that tie a family together forever. This wise, witty memoir--Etgar's first nonfiction book published in America, and told in his inimitable style--is full of wonder and life and love, poignant insights, and irrepressible humor.From the Hardcover edition.
The Seven Keys of Balabad
by Mark Zug Paul HavenInspired by the years he spent in Afghanistan and Pakistan as bureau chief with The Associated Press, Paul Haven's intricately crafted tale is filled with details of everyday life in this remote and frequently overlooked part of the world. Loosely based on the legendary Golden Hoard of Bactria--the renowned hidden treasure discovered in northern Afghanistan in 1978--this fast-paced middle-grade novel will appeal to readers who like their twists and turns filled with mysterious characters, exotic locales, and an utterly relatable protagonist. Welcome to Balabad, birthplace of the international secret society known as the Brotherhood of Arachosia--and rumored hiding place of the grandest riches the world has ever known. Balabad is also the country Oliver Finch has called home ever since his father was reassigned to this dull, war-torn dust bowl. Each day runs into the next for Oliver until a five-hundred-year-old sacred carpet is stolen. Then one of the few friends he has disappears. Oliver is determined to figure out what exactly is going on. But in order to do that he'll have to consult with a one-eyed warrior, track down the far-flung members of the Brotherhood, and unlock a centuries-old secret! Suddenly, life in Balabad for Oliver has become a whole lot more interesting . . . and dangerous.
The Seven Moons of Maali Almeida
by Shehan KarunatilakaAn Instant National Bestseller • One of the New York Times's 100 Notable Books of 2022 • An NPR Book We Loved in 2022 • Named a Best Fiction Book of 2022 by the Washington Post, Times (UK), Financial Times, and The Guardian. Winner of the 2022 Booker Prize, The Seven Moons of Maali Almeida is a searing satire set amid the mayhem of the Sri Lankan civil war. Colombo, 1990. Maali Almeida—war photographer, gambler, and closet queen—has woken up dead in what seems like a celestial visa office. His dismembered body is sinking in the serene Beira Lake and he has no idea who killed him. In a country where scores are settled by death squads, suicide bombers, and hired goons, the list of suspects is depressingly long, as the ghouls and ghosts with grudges who cluster round can attest. But even in the afterlife, time is running out for Maali. He has seven moons to contact the man and woman he loves most and lead them to the photos that will rock Sri Lanka. Ten years after his prize-winning novel Chinaman established him as one of Sri Lanka’s foremost authors, Shehan Karunatilaka is back with a “thrilling satire” (Economist) and rip-roaring state-of-the-nation epic that offers equal parts mordant wit and disturbing, profound truths.
The Seven Sneezes (A\golden Classic Ser.)
by Golden Books Bruce IngmanA classic Golden Book, with lots of kid appeal, is back in print!What happens when the local rag man sneezes? The kitten's ears end up on the bunny. The bunny's ears end up on the kitten. The dog meows, the cat barks. "No barnyard will have me!" crows the rooster, whose tail feathers now sprout out of his head. But with a little concentration--and a lot of pepper--the rag man tries to sneeze everything right: "Katchoo! Katchim! Katcham! Katchibble! Fumadiddle! Skedaddle! Fiddle-faddle!" Hilariously reillustrated by Bruce Ingman, this classic Golden Book will delight a new generation.From the Hardcover edition.
The Seven Torments of Amy and Craig (A Love Story): A Love Story
by Don ZolidisJanesville, Wisconsin (cold in the sense that there is no God)1994The best thing that's ever happened to Craig is also the worst: Amy. Amy and Craig never should've gotten together. Craig is an awkward Dungeons & Dragons-playing geek, and Amy is the beautiful, fiercely intelligent student-body president of their high school. Yet somehow they did?until Amy dumped him. Then got back together with him. Then dumped him again. Then got back together with him again. Over and over and over. Unfolding during their senior year, Amy and Craig's exhilarating, tumultuous relationship is a kaleidoscope of joy, pain, and laughter as an uncertain future-and adult responsibility-loom on the horizon. Craig fights for his dream of escaping Janesville and finding his place at a quirky college, while Amy's quest to uncover her true self sometimes involves being Craig's girlfriend?and sometimes doesn't. Seven heartbreaks. Seven joys.Told nonsequentially, acclaimed playwright Don Zolidis's debut novel is a brutally funny, bittersweet taste of the utterly unique and universal experience of first love.
The Seven Year Bitch
by Jennifer BelleFrom the bestselling author of High Maintenance and Going Down comes a witty, heartfelt comic novel about marriage, motherhood, and discovering that the life you have is exactly the one you want. What’s a fabulous New York City girl supposed to do when she finds herself fantasizing about the Grim Reaper more than she fantasizes about her husband? When she can’t help but give him the finger on the set of Sesame Street? And when she doesn’t exactly hope for a safe landing when he goes away on business? No, ex-hedge fund manager and new mom Isolde Brilliant hasn’t got the seven year itch-taking care of her baby and husband and having a growing suspicion that she’s living life in captivity has turned her into a seven year bitch. That’s New York author Jennifer Belle’s deliciously provocative phrase for the boredom, anger, and hurt that can creep into even the best of marriages-and affect even the most saintly of wives. In the tradition of Jennifer Weiner and Meg Wolitzer, Belle delivers a dead-on, raw and hilarious novel about motherhood and marriage and discovering the life you have is exactly the one you wanted. .
The Seven Year Slip
by Ashley Poston"A gorgeous love story from one of the finest romance writers out there." —Carley Fortune, New York Times bestselling author of Every Summer AfterA New York Public Library Best Book of 2023A Most Anticipated Book by Entertainment Weekly ∙ Harper's Bazaar ∙ PopSugar ∙ Real Simple ∙ BookRiot ∙ and more!An overworked book publicist with a perfectly planned future hits a snag when she falls in love with her temporary roommate…only to discover he lives seven years in the past, in this witty and wise new novel from the New York Times bestselling author of The Dead Romantics.Sometimes, the worst day of your life happens, and you have to figure out how to live after it.So Clementine forms a plan to keep her heart safe: work hard, find someone decent to love, and try to remember to chase the moon. The last one is silly and obviously metaphorical, but her aunt always told her that you needed at least one big dream to keep going. And for the last year, that plan has gone off without a hitch. Mostly. The love part is hard because she doesn&’t want to get too close to anyone—she isn&’t sure her heart can take it.And then she finds a strange man standing in the kitchen of her late aunt&’s apartment. A man with kind eyes and a Southern drawl and a taste for lemon pies. The kind of man that, before it all, she would&’ve fallen head-over-heels for. And she might again.Except, he exists in the past. Seven years ago, to be exact. And she, quite literally, lives seven years in his future.Her aunt always said the apartment was a pinch in time, a place where moments blended together like watercolors. And Clementine knows that if she lets her heart fall, she&’ll be doomed.After all, love is never a matter of time—but a matter of timing.
The Seventh Day
by Yu Hua Allan H. BarrFrom the acclaimed author of Brothers and To Live: a major new novel that limns the joys and sorrows of life in contemporary China. Yang Fei was born on a moving train. Lost by his mother, adopted by a young switchman, raised with simplicity and love, he is utterly unprepared for the tempestuous changes that await him and his country. As a young man, he searches for a place to belong in a nation that is ceaselessly reinventing itself, but he remains on the edges of society. At age forty-one, he meets an accidental and unceremonious death. Lacking the money for a burial plot, he must roam the afterworld aimlessly, without rest. Over the course of seven days, he encounters the souls of the people he's lost. As Yang Fei retraces the path of his life, we meet an extraordinary cast of characters: his adoptive father, his beautiful ex-wife, his neighbors who perished in the demolition of their homes. Traveling on, he sees that the afterworld encompasses all the casualties of today's China--the organ sellers, the young suicides, the innocent convicts--as well as the hope for a better life to come. Yang Fei's passage maps the contours of this vast nation--its absurdities, its sorrows, and its soul. Vivid, urgent, and panoramic, The Seventh Day affirms Yu Hua's place as the standard-bearer of modern Chinese fiction.From the Hardcover edition.
The Seventh Function of Language: A Novel
by Laurent Binet“A cunning, often hilarious mystery for the Mensa set and fans of Umberto Eco’s The Name of the Rose and Tom Stoppard’s Arcadia.” —Heller McAlpin, NPRParis, 1980. The literary critic Roland Barthes dies—struck by a laundry van—after lunch with the presidential candidate François Mitterand. The world of letters mourns a tragic accident. But what if it wasn’t an accident at all? What if Barthes was . . . murdered?In The Seventh Function of Language, Laurent Binet spins a madcap secret history of the French intelligentsia, starring such luminaries as Jacques Derrida, Umberto Eco, Gilles Deleuze, Michel Foucault, Judith Butler, and Julia Kristeva—as well as the hapless police detective Jacques Bayard, whose new case will plunge him into the depths of literary theory (starting with the French version of Roland Barthes for Dummies). Soon Bayard finds himself in search of a lost manuscript by the linguist Roman Jakobson on the mysterious “seventh function of language.”A brilliantly erudite comedy, The Seventh Function of Language takes us from the cafés of Saint-Germain to the corridors of Cornell University, and into the duels and orgies of the Logos Club, a secret philosophical society that dates to the Roman Empire. Binet has written both a send-up and a wildly exuberant celebration of the French intellectual tradition.“Binet juxtaposes car chases with highbrow in-jokes and ruminations. The book is a love letter to the power of language—the most dangerous weapon is the tongue.” —The New Yorker“An affectionate send-up of an Umberto Eco–style intellectual thriller that doubles as an exemplar of the genre, filled with suspense, elaborate conspiracies, and exotic locales.” —Esquire
The Several Lives of Orphan Jack
by Sarah EllisWinner of the Mr. Christie's Book Award and the IODE Violet Downey Book Award For young Jack, life is tough at the Opportunities School for Orphans. But Jack is good at staying out of trouble. He has skipped over trouble, danced around trouble, slid under trouble, melted away from trouble, talked his way out of trouble and slipped between two close troubles like a cat through a picket fence. When Jack turns twelve, he is given the biggest opportunity of all, but suddenly his life is nothing but trouble. Still, he is a clever and resilient boy, and eventually he makes his way into the big world. Jack is rich in ideas, and soon he finds there is a place for an enterprising boy who has whims, concepts, plans, opinions, impressions, notions and fancies to spare. In the tradition of Natalie Babbitt, Sarah Ellis brings her quirky sense of humor and imagination to bear in this witty, warm fable. Bruno St-Aubin's evocative black-and-white illustrations capture perfectly the dreadful Schoolmaster Bane, the crowlike accountant Mr. Ledger, Lou the skinny bun merchant, and Christabel, the miller's little daughter.
The Sex Lives of Cannibals: Adrift in the Equatorial Pacific
by J. Maarten TroostFantasized about quitting the 9-5? Walking away from credit card debt and student loans? Think living in the South Pacific for two years sounds like a perfect solution and perhaps even a winning idea for your first novel? Maarten Troost does just that, setting up as a devil-may-care islander while his girlfriend, Sylvia, gets to work on saving the planet, or at least a little part of it on an end-of-the-world atoll, Tarawa. Life on Tarawa resembles not so much paradise as a theatre of the absurd where planes fly with the aid of masking tape, Coconut Stalinism prevails as national government and Sylvia is co-opted by the CIA to spy on the Chinese. But abandoning continental hang-ups like barbequeing the local dogs and watching on as international industrial fishing trawlers plunder the world's richest tuna supply aren't so easy.
The Sex Lives of Siamese Twins
by Irvine WelshThe famed--some would say notorious--author of Trainspotting and many other brilliant offenses against common literary decency comes at last to America, with a dark and twisted tale of personal training and abject codependency in the fading glitter of Miami's South Beach, with a novel that asks the provocative question: Why would you want to be "the Biggest Loser" anyway? When Lucy Brennan, a Miami Beach personal-fitness trainer, disarms an apparently crazed gunman chasing two frightened homeless men along a deserted causeway at night, the police and the breaking-news cameras are not far behind. Within hours, Lucy becomes a hero. Her celebrity is short-lived, though: the "crazed gunman," turns out to be a victim of child sexual abuse and the two men are serial pedophiles. The solitary eye-witness, the depressed and overweight Lena Sorenson, thrilled by Lucy's heroism and decisiveness, becomes obsessed with the trainer and enrolls as a client at her Bodysculpt gym. It quickly becomes clear that Lena is more interested in Lucy's body than her own. Then, when one of the pedophiles she allowed to escape carries out a heinous sex attack, Lucy's transition from hero to villain is complete. When Lucy imprisons Lena, and can't stop thinking about the sex lives of Siamese twins, the real problems start. In Lucy and Lena, Irvine Welsh has created two of his most memorable female protagonists, and one of the most bizarre, sadomasochistic folie à deux in contemporary fiction. The Sex Lives of Siamese Twins taps into two great obsessions of our time--how we look and where we live--and tells a story so subversive and dark it blacks out the Florida sun.From the Hardcover edition.