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The Unexpected Pregnancy (Secret Passions)
by Catherine GeorgeHarriet Verney crossed paths again withbillionaire tycoon James Devereux when shereluctantly sold him her precious home. She was friendswith his younger brother, but had always felt intimidatedby James's rugged looks and powerful authority.Now his presence made Harriet's pulse race faster forother reasons, especially one night in Tuscany, whenshe woke to find James at the end of her bed!James soon discovered there was nothingstanding in the way of their attraction—or of Harriet conceiving their child….
The Unexpected and Fictional Career Change of Jim Kearns
by David MunroeJim Kearns, a career manual labourer, struggles to overcome stifling cynicism brought on by missed opportunities and mid-life discord - then he loses his job for punching out a Hollywood action star in a bizarre job-site confrontation. In an effort to salvage not only Jim’s sanity but also their unravelling family, his wife, Maddy, assigns him a series of life-affirming tasks to complete while he suffers through unemployment and his fifteen minutes of fame. Through the pages of his journal, we get an often humorous and sometimes touching view of one man’s life journey.At once compelling and hilarious, The Unexpected and Fictional Career Change of Jim Kearns is the most refreshing novel of the 2005.
The Unfaithful Wife (Presents Plus Ser. #53)
by Lynne GrahamA young woman is desperate to leave his sham marriage to a wealthy magnate in this classic contemporary romance by a USA Today–bestselling author.Leah’s marriage to powerful Greek businessman Nik Andreakis was an empty sham, and she was determined to get a divorce. But Nik didn’t want one. In the circumstances, Leah found that totally unbelievable. Why would he want to hang on to a wife he’d been blackmailed into marrying!Leah’s lonely wedding night had set the pattern for the past five years, but now she couldn’t sleep for wondering what motivated her husband. Why, all of a sudden, was he making advances to her when he had ignored her for so long?Originally published in 1995.
The Unflushables
by James Patterson Ron BatesJames Patterson presents: The Titans of the Toilet! The Wonders from Down Under! Nitro City's very own sewer superheroes: The Plumbers! Super Mario Bros meets Captain Underpants in this action-packed comedy sure to make a splash!Thirteen-year-old Sully Stringfellow has always admired the great plumber heroes of Nitro City. These wrench-wielding warriors guarded the sewers--until they were discredited by the powerful Ironwater Corporation, which has a sinister scheme to take over the city. Without the plumbers, Nitro is being overrun by mutant creatures--and things are about to go totally nuclear thanks to the potentially explosive 50th Anniversary Burrito Festival!It's up to Sully and a league of long-forgotten plumber heroes to save the day, making it safe for all to flush again. It's a dirty job, but someone's got to do it!
The Unforgettable Party
by Noemi VolaA hilarious, quirky picture book about the power of imagination and learning to enjoy your own company, for fans of Carson Ellis and Jon Klassen.Caterpillar is SO bored. But everyone knows the best cure for boredom: a marvelous, super-long, super-fun, unforgettable party! He already has everything he needs: apple juice, confetti, decorations, party hats and star stickers to stick on your face. Everything is perfect, except for one missing ingredient: FRIENDS.Unfortunately, none of Caterpillar's friends are available. Caterpillar is SO sad. But then he comes up with an ingenious solution: using a marker, he creates six new friends . . . on himself! After introducing themselves and shaking each others' hands (or feet), it's time for the party to begin. They dance, they play, they put on costumes and even eat seven feet of pizza. It's a marvelous time!But what happens when the party is over? Will Caterpillar's new friends leave him? Find out in this delightfully quirky picture book.
The Unfortunate Importance of Beauty: A Novel
by Amanda Filipacchi"A sure comic touch...smart and sweet...a tribute to the pleasures of friendship." --The New Yorker "Readers who'd like to spend a little time at the corner where a brisker Haruki Murakami meets a drier '30 Rock' would do well to seek out Filipacchi's radiantly intelligent and very funny novel." --San Francisco Chronicle A magical and comedic take on modern love, the power of friendship, and the allure of disguise. In the heart of New York City, a group of artistic friends struggles with society's standards of beauty. At the center are Barb and Lily, two women at opposite ends of the beauty spectrum, but with the same problem: each fears she will never find a love that can overcome her looks. Barb, a stunningly beautiful costume designer, makes herself ugly in hopes of finding true love. Meanwhile, her friend Lily, a brilliantly talented but plain-looking musician, goes to fantastic lengths to attract the man who has rejected her--with results that are as touching as they are transformative. To complicate matters, Barb and Lily discover that they may have a murderer in their midst, that Barb's calm disposition is more dangerously provocative than her beauty ever was, and that Lily's musical talents are more powerful than anyone could have imagined. Part literary whodunit, part surrealist farce, The Unfortunate Importance of Beauty serves as a smart, modern-day fairy tale. With biting wit and offbeat charm, Amanda Filipacchi illuminates the labyrinthine relationship between beauty, desire, and identity, asking at every turn: what does it truly mean to allow oneself to be seen?
The Unfortunate Miss Fortunes: A Novel
by Anne Stuart Jennifer Crusie Eileen DreyerYou're invited to spend the weekend with three extraordinary sisters…When she was sixteen, Dee Fortune kidnapped her two younger sisters and ran from danger. Now twenty-nine, she's still trying to control her shape-shifting power—no easy task when Danny James shows up one Friday morning with his deadly smile and dangerous questions about the past.Lizzie is determined to save her family from financial ruin by turning straw into gold; now if she could only stop turning forks into bunnies. Then Elric, a sorcerer, appears one Friday—annoyed with the chaos Lizzie is creating in the universe and in his heart. . . .The youngest Miss Fortune, Mare, towers above her sisters but her telekinetic power is dwarfed by their gifts. She spends her days at Value Video!! and her nights contemplating the futility of her existence. But then a gorgeous Value Video!! VP and Mare's long lost love turn up. . .and they all turn up the heat on a weekend that no Fortune will soon forget!
The Unfortunate Wishes of Nelly Young
by Beth GarrodFrom bestselling author Beth Garrod comes a fantastically funny wish fulfilment story. Perfect for fans of The Extremely Embarrassing Life of Lottie Brooks and The Amazing Edie Eckhart. Secondary school is ninety-eight days away, which means I&’m running out of time to break free from my totally embarrassing nickname Breaking News Nelly . . . Why did it have to be me who tripped playing netball and smashed a TV camera during the live report on our new sports hall opening?! I desperately need a relaunch, but it's hard when you have the worst luck in the world! At least I have my best friends Clara and Jas. Even though nothing ever seems to go right for us, we&’ve always been in it together. Like the time we wrote down our ultimate wishes but knew they wouldn&’t come true . . . until they did! Now more and more of our wishes are being granted, and we&’re having the best time ever! Maybe my fortunes have changed and I have the chance to ditch my old identity and become Totally Cool Nelly. Surely absolutely nothing is about to go wrong . . .?Praise for Sister Switch: 'Hilarious!' Jenny Valentine, author of A Girl Called Joy 'Blistering funny, this book is a joyous, sunny, heart-warming treat!' Simon James Green, author of Life of Riley &‘World-class and whip-smart comedy.&’ Sibéal Pounder, author of the Bad Mermaid series 'Beth Garrod is the queen of capturing those funny-awful-awkward teen moments and she creates such warm, loveable and relatable characters!' Perdita Cargill, author of Diary of an Accidental Witch
The Unfortunate Wishes of Nelly Young
by Beth GarrodA girl and her friends find their wishes coming true and their world turned upside down in this absurdly funny middle grade romp that&’s Dork Diaries meets The Wish by Gail Carson Levine.It&’s spring break, and twelve-year-old Nelly Young is determined to ditch the embarrassing nickname Breaking News Nelly and become Totally Cool Nelly. She&’s not quite sure how, but she&’s sure she&’ll figure it out…especially when she has her two best friends, Clara and Jas, by her side. Though nothing seems to go right for any of them, at least the three girls have each other. With nothing to lose, they&’re determined to make their own luck and write down their ultimate wishes. But to their surprise, the next morning they find their wishes starting to come true. But how?! They haven&’t got a clue, but soon the tides are turning for Nelly, Clara, and Jas, and all it takes is one wish…and then another…and another. Because when you have the power of unlimited wishes on your side, what could possibly go wrong?
The Unfortunates: A Novel
by J K ChukwuAn edgy, bitingly funny debut about a queer, half-Nigerian college sophomore who, enraged and exhausted by the racism at her elite college, sets out to find truth about The Unfortunates—the unlucky subset of Black undergrads who have been mysteriously dyingSahara is Not Okay. Entering her sophomore year at Elite University, she feels like a failure: her body is too curvy, her love life is nonexistent, her family is disappointed in her, her grades are terrible, and, well, the few Black classmates she has just keep dying. Sahara is close to giving up, herself: her depression is, as she says, her only &“Life Partner.&” And this narrative—taking the form of an irreverent, piercing &“thesis&” to the university committee that will judge her—is meant to be a final unfurling of her singular, unforgettable voice before her own inevitable disappearance and death. But over the course of this wild sophomore year, and supported by her eccentric community of BIPOC women, Sahara will eventually find hope, answers, and an unexpected redemption.
The Unhandsome Prince
by John MooreAnd they lived happily ever after…Caroline’s plan to live happily ever after has hit a snag. She’s spent months mapping the swamp, building tadpole nets, and kissing every wriggling frog she could get her hands on, and one has finally turned into a prince. Unfortunately, Prince Hal is not, as promised in the fairy tales, particularly handsome. In fact, he’s kind of dorky-looking.Hal himself isn’t very eager to marry a girl so obsessed with appearances, but he finds that a lot of people have a stake in his impending nuptials—including a sorceress in training, an irritating dwarf, and Hal’s own royal family, who seem to have misplaced large portions of the treasury. But the biggest reason for him to marry Caroline, true love be darned, is that if he doesn’t, it’s back to the lily pads for him—permanently…
The Unhoneymooners: The Unhoneymooners, Twice In A Blue Moon, The Honey-don't List (The\books Of Babel Ser.)
by Christina LaurenTHE INSTANT NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER! Starred reviews from Kirkus Reviews * Publishers Weekly * Library Journal Named a &“Must-Read&” by TODAY, Us Weekly, Bustle, BuzzFeed, Goodreads, Entertainment Weekly, Publishers Weekly, Southern Living, Book Riot, Woman&’s Day, The Toronto Star, and more! For two sworn enemies, anything can happen during the Hawaiian trip of a lifetime—maybe even love—in this romantic comedy from the New York Times bestselling authors of Roomies.Olive Torres is used to being the unlucky twin: from inexplicable mishaps to a recent layoff, her life seems to be almost comically jinxed. By contrast, her sister Ami is an eternal champion...she even managed to finance her entire wedding by winning a slew of contests. Unfortunately for Olive, the only thing worse than constant bad luck is having to spend the wedding day with the best man (and her nemesis), Ethan Thomas. Olive braces herself for wedding hell, determined to put on a brave face, but when the entire wedding party gets food poisoning, the only people who aren&’t affected are Olive and Ethan. Suddenly there&’s a free honeymoon up for grabs, and Olive will be damned if Ethan gets to enjoy paradise solo. Agreeing to a temporary truce, the pair head for Maui. After all, ten days of bliss is worth having to assume the role of loving newlyweds, right? But the weird thing is...Olive doesn&’t mind playing pretend. In fact, the more she pretends to be the luckiest woman alive, the more it feels like she might be. With Christina Lauren&’s &“uniquely hilarious and touching voice&” (Entertainment Weekly), The Unhoneymooners is a romance for anyone who has ever felt unlucky in love.
The Unicorn Emergency #8 (Beasts Of Olympus Ser. #8)
by Lucy Coats Brett BeanHow will Demon, official Beast Keeper of Mount Olympus, heal a herd of sick unicorns before it's too late?Demon has just returned from a trip to Asgard when a brand-new set of disasters fall into his lap. Not only does he have a groggy volcano monster to deal with, but something seems to be wrong with the unicorns, too. Demon's only clue is a mysterious note saying "Unicorn Emergency!" left on his bed. What does it mean? And how will Demon figure out the problem and fix it before time runs out?
The Unicorn Girl: The Greenwich Village Trilogy Book Two
by Michael Kurland"Settle in for a trip to a wonderful half-real, half-imaginary era." — Richard A. Lupoff Mike and Chester, the alien-fighting hippies of The Butterfly Kid, have found their way from New York City to San Francisco — but that's just the first step of their odyssey. When Mike meets the girl of his dreams, he and Chester join her and her circus friends on a quest in search of a lost unicorn. Psychedelic hilarity ensues as they travel through time to encounter Victorian nudists, fire-breathing dragonettes, and live dinosaurs.Touted as a "brain-blowing science-fiction freak out" upon its 1969 publication, The Unicorn Girl is the second book in the Greenwich Village Trilogy, a shared-world scenario written by three different authors, all of whom appear in the books as characters. Dover Publications returns this cosmic adventure to print for the first time in nearly 40 years, along with its predecessor, The Butterfly Kid, and its sequel, The Probability Pad. This edition features an appreciative new Foreword by science-fiction author Richard A. Lupoff.
The Unicorn's Tale (Nathaniel Fludd, Beastologist, Book #4)
by R. L. LaFevers Kelly MurphyIs there no rest for the travel worn and weary? Not if you're Nathaniel Fludd, the world's youngest beastologist-in-training! All Nate really wants is to track down his missing parents, but when a unicorn falls mysteriously ill, Nate's Aunt Phil makes it clear where a beastologist's duty lies: to the beasts. And if taking care of the world's beasts isn't difficult enough, Nate and Aunt Phil must also keep them safe from the villainous Obediah Fludd, who intends to do them harm. With all this taking up every last bit of his energy and time, will Nate ever find the parents he is so absolutely convinced are alive?
The Unicorns Who Saved Christmas
by Mary Winn HeiderIn this delightful and hilarious holiday picture book, can a troop of unicorns really save Christmas?It's Christmas Eve, and Santa's reindeer are sick with the chicken pox. They can't pull his sleigh, so Santa needs some serious help. Will the unicorns save Christmas despite coming down with a case of hiccups? Or will Christmas have to be canceled?
The Uninvited Houseguests
by Pam BailesA young girl just moved to Arizona! She loves all the new wildlife that she gets to meet in the desert. When a family of bobcats moves onto her roof, her family must find a way to evict them.
The United States of Absurdity: Untold Stories from American History
by Patton Oswalt Dave Anthony Gareth ReynoldsThe creators of the podcast The Dollop present illustrated profiles of the weird, outrageous, NSFW, and downright absurd tales from American history that you weren't taught in school.The United States of Absurdity presents short, informative, and hilarious stories of the most outlandish (but true) people, events, and more from United States history. Comedians Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds cover the weird stories you didn't learn in history class, such as 10-Cent Beer Night, the Jackson Cheese, and the Kentucky Meat Shower, accompanied by full-page illustrations that bring each historical "milestone" to life in full-color.
The United States vs. Santa Claus: The Untold Story of the Actual War on Christmas
by Brian Sack Jack HelmuthThe comedic minds behind TheBlaze TV's hit show The B.S. of A. with Brian Sack bring you a hilarious illustrated account about the government's never-ending war on Christmas.'Twas right before ChristmasAnd in the White HouseA dread plan was hatchedTo make Santa a louseJoe Biden assisted, and Mike Bloomberg tooAnd before we all knew it, old Saint Nick was through.The comedic minds behind TheBlaze TV's hit show, The B.S. of A. with Brian Sack bring you their hilarious vision of Christmas Future--or possibly sooner.What happens when the Scrooge-iest Washington politicians take on the jolliest soul of all time? Can a scandal-plagued administration distract the American public by bringing Santa to his knees? Can a bumbling bureaucracy destroy the reputation of the most popular man in the Northern Hemisphere? Spoiler alert: YES! And faster than you can say ho-ho-ho! This is the sad story of the real war on Christmas--and how the NSA, IRS, OSHA and every other acronym in Washington came gunning for the man in red with everything they've got: two-thousand page reports on the environmental impact of reindeer farts...unionized elves...suspicious audits...character assassination...and all the other cruel and unusual tactics of an out-of-control government. Yes Virginia, there was a Santa Claus. This is his story.
The Universe According to G. K. Chesterton: A Dictionary of the Mad, Mundane and Metaphysical
by G. K. Chesterton Dale AhlquistFashion: An ideals that fails to satisfy.Water: A medicine. It should be taken in small quantities in very extreme cases; as when one is going to faint.Work: Doing what you do not like.This quirky, original compilation serves up the eccentric wit and thought-provoking aphorisms of one of the twentieth century's liveliest and most articulate minds. Assembled by the president of the American Chesterton Society, it features alphabetical entries of "Chesternitions"--pithy and poetic definitions of words in the spirit of Samuel Johnson. Great for casual browsing or cover-to-cover study, the volume includes more than two dozen of Chesterton's distinctive drawings.
The Universe Explained with a Cookie: What Baking Cookies Can Teach Us About Quantum Mechanics, Cosmology, Evolution, Chaos, Complexity, and More
by Geoff EngelsteinDid you know that the number of atoms in a cookie is about the same number of stars in the universe? Geoff Engelstein tackles the big questions of the universe and how it works using the sweet and simple chocolate cookie as guide. By exploring what goes into the cookie—the ingredients and the steps—we learn about how everything works, from the tiny world of subatomic particles to galactic clusters. Topics include: The Big Bang Explained with Chocolate ChipsQuantum Mechanics Explained with Milk and CookiesChaos Explained with VanillaAnd more!Filled with fascinating facts and laugh-out-loud moments, it's a richly visual and deeply fascinating scientific exploration of the world. And cookies.
The Universe versus Alex Woods: An UNFORGETTABLE story of an unexpected friendship, an unlikely hero and an improbable journey
by Gavin Extence*Perfect for fans of A BOY MADE OF BLOCKS***RICHARD AND JUDY summer bookclub read 2013, Amazon Rising star, and shortlisted for the Desmond Elliott Prize***** A funny and touching story of an unlikely friendship and an improbable journey***Alex Woods knows that he hasn't had the most conventional start in life. He knows that growing up with a clairvoyant single mother won't endear him to the local bullies. He also knows that even the most improbable events can happen - he's got the scars to prove it. What he doesn't know yet is that when he meets ill-tempered, reclusive widower Mr Peterson, he'll make an unlikely friend. Someone who tells him that you only get one shot at life. That you have to make the best possible choices. So when, aged seventeen, Alex is stopped at Dover customs with 113 grams of marijuana, an urn full of ashes on the passenger seat, and an entire nation in uproar, he's fairly sure he's done the right thing.A tale of an unexpected friendship, an unlikely hero and an improbable journey, Alex's story treads the fine line between light and dark, laughter and tears. And it might just strike you as one of the funniest, most heartbreaking novels you've ever read.
The Universe versus Alex Woods: An UNFORGETTABLE story of an unexpected friendship, an unlikely hero and an improbable journey
by Gavin ExtenceA tale of an unexpected friendship, an unlikely hero and an improbable journey, Alex's story treads the fine line between light and dark, laughter and tears. And it might just strike you as one of the funniest, most heartbreaking novels you've ever heard.Alex Woods knows that he hasn't had the most conventional start in life. He knows that growing up with a clairvoyant single mother won't endear him to the local bullies. He also knows that even the most improbable events can happen - he's got the scars to prove it. What he doesn't know yet is that when he meets ill-tempered, reclusive widower Mr Peterson, he'll make an unlikely friend. Someone who tells him that you only get one shot at life. That you have to make the best possible choices. So when, aged seventeen, Alex is stopped at Dover customs with 113 grams of marijuana, an urn full of ashes on the passenger seat, and an entire nation in uproar, he's fairly sure he's done the right thing . . .(P)2013 Hodder & Stoughton
The Unknowns: A Novel
by Gabriel RothEric Muller has been trying to hack the girlfriend problem for half his life. As a teenage geek, he discovered his gift for programming computers-but his attempts to understand women only confirm that he's better at writing code than connecting with human beings. Brilliant, neurotic, and lonely, Eric spends high school in the solitary glow of a screen.By his early twenties, Eric's talent has made him a Silicon Valley millionaire. He can coax girls into bed with ironic remarks and carefully timed intimacies, but hiding behind wit and empathy gets lonely, and he fears that love will always be out of reach.So when Eric falls for the beautiful, fiercely opinionated Maya Marcom, and she miraculously falls for him too, he's in new territory. But the more he learns about his perfect girlfriend's unresolved past, the further Eric's obsessive mind spirals into confusion and doubt. Can he reconcile his need for order and logic with the mystery and chaos of love?This brilliant debut ushers Eric Muller-flawed, funny, irresistibly endearing-into the pantheon of unlikely heroes. With an unblinking eye for the absurdities and horrors of contemporary life, Gabriel Roth gives us a hilarious and heartbreaking meditation on self consciousness, memory, and love.
The Unlikelies
by Carrie Firestone<p>Rising high school senior Sadie is bracing herself for a long, lonely, and boring summer. But things take an unexpected turn when she steps in to help rescue a baby in distress and a video of her good deed goes viral. <p>Suddenly internet-famous, Sadie's summer changes for the better when she's introduced to other "hometown heroes." These five very different teens form an unlikely alliance to secretly right local wrongs, but when they try to help a heroin-using friend, they get in over their heads and discover that there might be truth in the saying "no good deed goes unpunished." Can Sadie and her new friends make it through the summer with their friendships--and anonymity--intact? <p>This rich and thought-provoking novel takes on timely issues and timeless experiences with a winning combination of romance, humor, and wisdom. </p>