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Tweet Land of Liberty
by Elinor LipmanElinor Lipman (@elinorlipman) chronicles the 2012 election season with a poem a day--all in 140 characters or less.Judy Blume "It's nice to see that Lipman's wit has escaped the hell of Twitter and collected itself in a book." --Jonathan Franzen, author of Freedom "A devotion of fearless, sassy, sublime insights, that should be carried into the voting booth of our daily lives--each poem read again and again--before any lever is pulled." --Nikky Finney, winner of the 2011 National Book Award for Poetry "So it has come to this! Of thee I zing. I love it." --Lois Lowry "The only sane, smart and witty thing to come out of the Republican primaries." --Stephen McCauley "Jon Stewart in 140 characters -- and in the morning. What could be better?" --Stacy Schiff "Winsome, witty and winning! I don't know how she does it!! " --Anita Shreve "Elinor Lipman tweets like a nightingale with an eagle eye." --Cathleen Schine "Dorothy Parker, Ogden Nash, Calvin Trillin, and Elinor Lipman!!" --Mameve Medwed "Elinor Lipman is to tweets what Shakespeare is to sonnets." --Firoozeh Dumas "There once was a Lipman on Twitter, who made every liberal titter." --Michael Lowenthal "I'm beset with Lipmania." --Henry Alford "Wise and sassy and too fun to miss!" --Jill McCorkle
Tweet This Book: The 1,400 Greatest Quotes of All Time in 140 Characters or Less
by Compiled;edited by Sayre Van Young;Marin Van YoungTweetable-length quotes that are clever, cool, smart, touching, wise, funny, and more from the author of The Unofficial Harry Potter Vocabulary Builder.Brevity may be the soul of wit, but 280 characters is the absolute limit on Twitter! Luckily, Tweet This Book allows you to spice up their microblog with the greatest quotes of all time. Each one is not only brief—it is officially tweetable. The quick, punchy quotes in this wonderfully diverse collection come from all circles and include literary greats; politicians like Abe Lincoln, Winston Churchill, and Barack Obama; and sports figures, musicians, and celebrities like Yogi Berra, Tupac Shakur, and Hunter S. Thompson. With an easy-to-use, A-to-Z organization by topic, you can quickly find the perfect quote for anything you want to tweet about.“You’d be surprised how much it costs to look this cheap.” —Dolly Parton“Why go out for hamburger when you have steak at home?” —Paul Newman“The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you’re still a rat.” —Lily Tomlin“Giving birth is like taking your lower lip and forcing it over your head.” —Carol Burnett“The only time to eat diet food is while you’re waiting for the steak to cook.” —Julia Child“Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.” —Oscar Wilde“Life is too short to blend in.” —Paris Hilton“Whatever you are, be a good one.” —Abraham Lincoln“Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place.” —Billy Crystal“Fasten your seat belts. It’s going to be a bumpy night.” —Bette Davis (in All About Eve)
Tweeting in Tuk-Tuks: Digital Enlightenment in India
by Stefan Mey Anthea HeyesThe story of a man who came to India to work and then found very different, unusual things there. The book is written in the form of short exerpts in the social media age known as the 21st century. We hear the Om but don't recognise it; somewhere beside a pooing cow, a middle-class Indian is busy checking in with Foursquare while self-discovery tourists are searching for salvation. People are tweeting everywhere. This is a story of social media self-discovery - probably the first in the entire known universe. It took shape during travel, while all sorts of things were constantly happening around the author; while he was actually trying to land an important deal in India - or maybe not? India has never been so digital, but at the same time nor so colourful or so real. This book tells us why the aspiring country can still confuse us, even in the age of Facebook. It's a must-have for anyone who's had enough of traditional self-discovery literature.
Twelfth Knight
by Alexene Farol FollmuthFrom the author of The Atlas Six (under the penname Olivie Blake) comes Twelfth Knight, a YA romantic comedy and coming of age story about taking up space in the world and learning what it means to let others in. <P><P> Viola Reyes is annoyed. <P><P> Her painstakingly crafted tabletop game campaign was shot down, her best friend is suggesting she try being more “likable,” and her school's star running back Jack Orsino is the most lackadaisical Student Body President she’s ever seen, which makes her job as VP that much harder. Vi’s favorite escape from the world is the MMORPG Twelfth Knight, but online spaces aren’t exactly kind to girls like her—girls who are extremely competent and have the swagger to prove it. So Vi creates a masculine alter ego, choosing to play as a knight named Cesario to create a safe haven for herself. <P><P> But when a football injury leads Jack Orsino to the world of Twelfth Knight, Vi is alarmed to discover their online alter egos—Cesario and Duke Orsino—are surprisingly well-matched. <P><P> As the long nights of game-play turn into discussions about life and love, Vi and Jack soon realise they’ve become more than just weapon-wielding characters in an online game. But Vi has been concealing her true identity from Jack, and Jack might just be falling for her offline… <p> <b>New York Times Bestseller</b>
Twelfth Night Proposal (Shakespeare in Love)
by Karen Rose SmithTo love, or not to love?That is the question for widower Leo Montgomery, a boat designer who'd do anything to make his little .girl happy-except let himself fall for her sweet-faced nanny. Even if that nanny is staying in the bedroom riext door. And even if he can't keep khis mind off Verity Sumpter. Because beneath her drab clothes and plain-Jane glasses he senses there is a beautiful woman who could fill his heart with joy. And a woman who seems as wary of embracing love as he is. Still, can Leo find the courage to put a new spin on this beloved old play...?
The Twelve Chairs (Northwestern World Classics)
by Ilya Ilf Evgeny Petrov Anne O. FisherWinner, 2012 Northern California Book Award for Fiction in Translation More faithful to the original text and its deeply resonant humor, this new translation of The Twelve Chairs brings Ilf and Petrov’s Russian classic fully to life. The novel’s iconic hero, Ostap Bender, an unemployed con artist living by his wits, joins forces with Ippolit Matveyevich Vorobyaninov, a former nobleman who has returned to his hometown to look for a cache of missing jewels hidden in chairs that have been appropriated by the Soviet authorities. The search for the chairs takes them from the provinces of Moscow to the wilds of the Transcaucasus mountains. On their quest they encounter a variety of characters, from opportunistic Soviet bureaucrats to aging survivors of the old propertied classes, each one more selfish, venal, and bungling than the last. A brilliant satire of the early years of the Soviet Union, as well as the inspiration for a Mel Brooks film, The Twelve Chairs retains its universal appeal.
The Twelve Dates of Christmas
by Jenny Bayliss'Tis the season for finding romance in this hilarious and uplifting holiday readWhen it comes to relationships, thirty-four-year-old Kate Turner is ready to say "Bah, humbug." The sleepy town of Blexford, England, isn't exactly brimming with prospects, and anyway, Kate's found fulfillment in her career as a designer, and in her delicious side job baking for her old friend Matt's neighborhood café. But then her best friend signs her up for a dating agency that promises to help singles find love before the holidays. Twenty-three days until Christmas. Twelve dates with twelve different men. The odds must finally be in her favor . . . right? Yet with each new date more disastrous than the one before--and the whole town keeping tabs on her misadventures--Kate must remind herself that sometimes love, like mistletoe, shows up where it's least expected. And maybe, just maybe, it's been right under her nose all along. . . .
The Twelve Dates of Christmas: the gloriously festive and romantic winter read
by Lisa DickensonPrepare to fall in love this Christmas with the ultimate festive romance . . .'A perfect Christmas treat' MIRANDA DICKINSON'Sprinkled with humour, warmth and, of course, Christmas magic' CATHY BRAMLEY*WINNER OF THE NOVELICIOUS DEBUT OF THE YEAR AWARD*Claudia is thirty and fearing her romance with long-term love Seth has lost its spark. Determined to rediscover the magic they once had, Claudia and Seth go on their first date in a very long time. But when the night ends in disaster, Claudia suddenly finds herself facing life - and Christmas - alone.But being alone doesn't mean she has to be miserable. Familiarising herself with long-forgotten exercise regimes and ill-advised sexy underwear, Claudia decides to fill up her Christmas with dates. And with best friends Penny and Nick at her side, a surplus of festive markets, mulled wine and Christmas tunes, Claudia feels ready to face anything life can throw at her. One thing's for sure, this year Christmas is going to be very different . . .Filled with Christmas sparkle, butterflies-in-your-stomach romance and a LOT of humour, The Twelve Dates of Christmas is the perfect festive romance to settle down with this winter. Perfect for fans of Sarah Morgan, Heidi Swan and Cathy Bramley.PRAISE FOR LISA DICKENSON:'A very funny and touching tale' HEAT magazine'A fun and festive sweet treat of a book' ALI MCNAMARA'You need to read this romcom! Fun, flirty and funny' FABULOUS magazine'A fun, flirty festive read full of Christmas sparkle and romance' JO THOMAS
The Twelve Dates of Christmas: the gloriously festive and romantic winter read
by Lisa Dickenson*WINNER OF THE NOVELICIOUS DEBUT OF THE YEAR AWARD* At thirty, Claudia's life is stale and the romance with long-term boyfriend, Seth, has disappeared. Determined to inject some festive spark back into their love life, Claudia and Seth go on their first date in a very long time. But when the night ends in disaster, Claudia suddenly finds herself facing life - and Christmas - alone. Life alone is exciting, scary and full of soon-forgotten exercise regimes and ill-advised attempts at crafting sexy underwear. It's also filling up with dates, surprisingly. With best friends Penny and Nick at her side, a surplus of festive markets, mulled wine and Christmas tunes, Claudia attempts to face all this change with gusto. One thing's for certain: this year, Christmas is going to be very different . . . This is the story of Claudia and her twelve dates of Christmas. Hilarious, uplifting and romantic, it's a story about losing love, finding love, and discovering what's been there all along. Expect Christmas sparkle, butterflies-in-your-stomach romance and a lot of very funny moments in The Twelve Dates of Christmas.
The Twelve Dates of Christmas: the gloriously festive and romantic winter read (Christmas Fiction)
by Lisa DickensonPrepare to fall in love this Christmas with the ultimate festive romance . . .'A perfect Christmas treat' MIRANDA DICKINSON'Sprinkled with humour, warmth and, of course, Christmas magic' CATHY BRAMLEY*WINNER OF THE NOVELICIOUS DEBUT OF THE YEAR AWARD*Claudia is thirty and fearing her romance with long-term love Seth has lost its spark. Determined to rediscover the magic they once had, Claudia and Seth go on their first date in a very long time. But when the night ends in disaster, Claudia suddenly finds herself facing life - and Christmas - alone.But being alone doesn't mean she has to be miserable. Familiarising herself with long-forgotten exercise regimes and ill-advised sexy underwear, Claudia decides to fill up her Christmas with dates. And with best friends Penny and Nick at her side, a surplus of festive markets, mulled wine and Christmas tunes, Claudia feels ready to face anything life can throw at her. One thing's for sure, this year Christmas is going to be very different . . .Filled with Christmas sparkle, butterflies-in-your-stomach romance and a LOT of humour, The Twelve Dates of Christmas is the perfect festive romance to settle down with this winter. Perfect for fans of Sarah Morgan, Heidi Swan and Cathy Bramley.PRAISE FOR LISA DICKENSON:'A very funny and touching tale' HEAT magazine'A fun and festive sweet treat of a book' ALI MCNAMARA'You need to read this romcom! Fun, flirty and funny' FABULOUS magazine'A fun, flirty festive read full of Christmas sparkle and romance' JO THOMAS
The Twelve Dates of Christmas (The Romantic Comedies)
by Catherine HapkaLexi's feeling a little holidazed this winter.... Lexi's been going out with Cameron for way too long. Sure, he's a nice guy, but there's a spark missing between them. So she comes up with the perfect plan: get him to fall for another girl so she'll be free -- and guilt-free, too. But when Lexi sees Cameron looking awfully cozy with Jaylene, her heart melts, especially when her budding psychologist best friend tells her that once a new couple has gone out a dozen times, their relationship is pretty much set. Cameron's twelfth date with Jaylene -- the Christmas Ball -- is coming up. Can Lexi find a way to rekindle her relationship with Cameron in the (saint) nick of time?
The Twelve Dates of Christmas
by Susan MeierThe perfect business arrangement? When entrepreneur Ricky Langley offers Eloise Vaughn the help she needs, in exchange for her attending twelve Christmas parties as his date, she can't refuse. Yes, Ricky's handsome, and devastatingly charming, but this is about business. If only her racing heart would get the message! Ricky has his own reasons for hating Christmas. But with each date that passes Eloise opens his eyes to the spirit of the season...and opens his heart to a totally different future....
Twelve Hours of Temptation
by Shoma NarayananThe best mistake of his life?Being chained to her desk is not how copywriter Melissa D'Cruz envisaged spending the night before her first major awards ceremony. No Cinderella moment for this award nominee-instead she's facing a night of deadlines! But Melissa is determined to get to the event...she just has to work out how....New boss Samir Razdan catches Melissa burning the midnight oil and offers to drive her to the event himself. But the minute they set off Samir knows he's in trouble-because being this close to Melissa is already driving him crazy, and they've got twelve torturous hours of temptation ahead...!
The Twelve Jays of Christmas: A Meg Langslow Mystery (Meg Langslow Mysteries #30)
by Donna AndrewsThe cast of Donna Andrews’ New York Times bestselling Meg Langslow mystery series is back for an unforgettable holiday story in The Twelve Jays of Christmas.Meg and Michael’s annual holiday celebration is well underway, with a throng of out-of-town relatives staying at their house. Hosting these festivities is a little harder than usual—they have to relocate all the events normally held in their library, currently occupied by Roderick Castlemayne, the irascible wildlife artist who’s creating twelve paintings of birds to illustrate Meg’s grandfather’s latest nature book.Still, the celebrations continue—and the entire family rejoices to learn that Meg’s brother Rob and his longtime fiancée Delaney have finally decided to tie the knot. Unfortunately, they decide to do this in the middle of Meg and Michael’s annual New Year’s bash, dashing their mothers’ hopes of planning the wedding to end all weddings.Delaney’s mother sneaks into town so she and Meg’s mother can secretly plot a way to talk the happy couple into having a big bash. Hiding her only adds to Meg’s holiday stress—it’s almost a full-time job fending all the visitors who want to confront Castlemayne—reporters, bill collectors, process servers, and several ex-wives in search of unpaid alimony.Then someone murders Castlemayne in the middle of a blizzard and sets loose the birds he was painting. Can Meg help the police crack the case before the killer strikes again? Can she keep Christmas merry in spite of the body in the library? Can she negotiate a compromise between Rob and Delaney and their disappointed mothers? And can she recapture the twelve escaped jays before they begin nesting in the Christmas tree?This intrigue-filled Christmas mystery takes readers home to Caerphilly to join in Meg's family's holiday celebration—including, of course, another baffling mystery.
Twelve Labours of Love: A charming romantic comedy to warm your heart
by Laura StewartWhat would you do for love? Three people find out in this delightful contemporary romantic comedy . . . Three friends come together in the hope of finding love. Caz is determined to find The One and, keen to speed up the process, believes in &“asking the universe&” for help in matters of the heart. Her friends Mallory and Olly think it&’s a lot of nonsense. When Mallory accepts a job designing the interior of a new Greek restaurant, she is horrified to learn that she accidentally handed in a CV that she wrote as a self-help exercise. It&’s filled with skills and accomplishments she&’d like to have . . . but doesn&’t. So when co-owner Alex, the sexy son of a millionaire, asks for her help preparing a gourmet meal, she has no choice but to start trying to live up to her fictitious résumé. Even if she can&’t cook! Meanwhile, Caz and Olly have their own to-do lists—and Olly&’s includes either telling Mallory that he is her One or learning how to move on from his unrequited love. Caz is certain that the gods move in mysterious ways, and romance is just around the corner. Although it may lie in the most unexpected places . . .
The Twelve Months of Christmas: A Cozy Christmas Romance Novel
by Sheila RobertsThree women. Three terrible Christmases. Can they finally perfect the holiday by celebrating every month? From USA TODAY bestselling author Sheila Roberts comes a story of family, second chances and holiday do-overs, brimming with warmth and Christmas charm.Sunny, Arianna and Molly are having three very different but equally terrible Christmases. Sunny is a newlywed with two new stepkids who want nothing to do with her; Arianna is newly divorced and hates having to send her daughter off to spend the holiday with her dad; for Molly, nothing is new, but her job at the post office is getting very, very old.The whole Christmas season has been a bust all around. But Sunny and Arianna have a wild idea: What if they had a Christmas do-over in January? February? On Saint Patrick&’s Day?Christmas all year long—what could that look like? As these three determined women chase the perfect holiday through twelve months of cooking disasters, over-the-top festivity, and lots of laughter and tears, they&’ll discover perfection is way overrated.&“When it comes to crafting feel-good stories that cleverly mix love and laughter, then skillfully wrap everything up with a bright holiday bow, Roberts is in a class by herself.&”—Booklist
The Twelve Nights of Christmas (Snowkissed and Seduced! #2)
by Sarah MorganA cynical millionaire hotelier unwraps quite a Christmas present in his penthouse in this holiday romance by a USA Today–bestselling author.Unexpectedly homeless for the festive season and exhausted from transforming the penthouse of the hotel where she works into a dazzling winter wonderland, chambermaid Evie Anderson secretly sleeps over. Woken by an outrageously sensual kiss, Evie feels her body come alive . . . until she realizes her seducer is Rio Zaccarelli, her dangerously attractive new boss!This Christmas, it’s imperative that Rio’s reputation appear spotless—but innocently enticing Evie is a temptation he can’t resist! Their scorching chemistry leads to twelve nights of endless pleasure. But will it last once the decorations come down?
Twelve Percent Dread
by Emily McGovernA fast-paced, laugh-a-page graphic novel about friendship, capitalism, and never putting your f***ing phone away!Katie and Nas are best friends, exes, co-dependents. They share everything, including a tiny room in a North London townhouse belonging to their landlord Jeremy, former host of the hit 90s show &‘Football Lads&’. While Katie bounces from job to job and obsesses about falling behind in life, Nas has bigger things in mind—waiting endlessly for their visa to come through, while working on a seismic art project that will revolutionize politics and society as we know it. Their friend Emma, meanwhile, seems to have it all figured out—job, mortgage, engagement—yet the long hours working for tech giant Arko and endless wedding admin prove equally dread-inducing. But when Katie&’s latest job finds her tutoring the daughter of Arko&’s formidable CEO, Michelle, and Emma welcomes the eccentric and enigmatic Alicia to her team at Arko, none of the three women are aware that their lives—and possibly the future of society itself—are about to change forever. Twelve Percent Dread is a fast-paced, laugh-a-page graphic novel about friendship, capitalism, and never putting your f***ing phone away from Emily McGovern, author of Bloodlust & Bonnets and the hugely popular webcomic My Life As A Background Slytherin.
Twelve Rooms with a View: A Novel
by Theresa RebeckWhat could be bad about a 12-room apartment with a view of Central Park? Everyone wants it, and will do just about anything to get it, in this quirky second novel from a celebrated playwright.
Twelve Stories of Russia
by Anthony PerryHilariously funny adventures of a young American in new Russia, about his misconceptions, blunders, and revelations, his futile attempt to love vodka, his long-distance relationship with his American aunt. In his quest he witnesses the failed coup, rampant inflation, mafia fighting, and much else.
Twelve Summers
by Adam ZwarCricket fans, where were you during the disaster that was the 2013 Ashes? Adam Zwar was making a documentary about bodyline and filming a stunt that involved Brett Lee bowling bouncers to him while he wasn't wearing a helmet. Matthew Hayden warned him not do it. But the cameras were set up. What was he going to do - say no?How about when Australia A nearly upset Australia in the 1995 World Series Cup and the players were rebelling against officials? Adam was working as a driver for an escort agency in Melbourne.Or Australia v India in 2001? That was when Adam was stuck in a hotel with AC/DC. For all the significant moments in Adam's life, cricket was in the background - or foreground. And you don't need to be a fan of cricket to be able to relate, because we all remember where we were when something important happened, whether that's a cricket test, an album release or a TV show ending. Twelve Summers is hilarious, moving and thought provoking. Even if you aren't a fan of cricket, you'll find a lot to love in this book.
Twelve Summers: Being a life-long fan of Australian cricket is harder than it looks
by Adam ZwarCricket fans, where were you during the disaster that was the 2013 Ashes? Adam Zwar was making a documentary about bodyline and filming a stunt that involved Brett Lee bowling bouncers to him while he wasn't wearing a helmet. Matthew Hayden warned him not do it. But the cameras were set up. What was he going to do - say no?How about when Australia A nearly upset Australia in the 1995 World Series Cup and the players were rebelling against officials? Adam was working as a driver for an escort agency in Melbourne.Or Australia v India in 2001? That was when Adam was stuck in a hotel with AC/DC. For all the significant moments in Adam's life, cricket was in the background - or foreground. And you don't need to be a fan of cricket to be able to relate, because we all remember where we were when something important happened, whether that's a cricket test, an album release or a TV show ending. Twelve Summers is hilarious, moving and thought provoking. Even if you aren't a fan of cricket, you'll find a lot to love in this book.
Twelve Tasks
by Therese WoodsonRoutine makes Eliot Taylor happy. He thinks. He goes to work, goes to school, and lives with his two best friends. Except lately, something's missing. While he's hungover from New Year's Eve, Eliot's friend Jen coerces him into a New Year's resolution. They agree to try one new activity per month for an entire year. Each new experience checked off his list, like singing karaoke and bungee jumping, destroys more of Eliot's comfortable routine. He meets new people. He falls in love. And despite how much it scares him, he learns to love life a little out of order.
Twenties Girl: A Novel
by Sophie KinsellaLara Lington has always had an overactive imagination, but suddenly that imagination seems to be in overdrive. Normal professional twenty-something young women don't get visited by ghosts. Or do they?When the spirit of Lara's great-aunt Sadie--a feisty, demanding girl with firm ideas about fashion, love, and the right way to dance--mysteriously appears, she has one request: Lara must find a missing necklace that had been in Sadie's possession for more than seventy-five years, because Sadie cannot rest without it. Lara and Sadie make a hilarious sparring duo, and at first it seems as though they have nothing in common. But as the mission to find Sadie's necklace leads to intrigue and a new romance for Lara, these very different "twenties" girls learn some surprising truths from and about each other. Written with all the irrepressible charm and humor that have made Sophie Kinsella's books beloved by millions, Twenties Girl is also a deeply moving testament to the transcendent bonds of friendship and family.
Twenty Guys You Date in Your Twenties: (funny Dating Book For Women, Online Dating Book For Women)
by Gabi ContiA bitingly funny field guide to modern love from the woman who's dated them all. Through highly relatable anecdotes from a decade of dating, Twenty Guys You Date in Your Twenties dives into the joys, frustrations, and hilarity of swiping right on relationships. After a world-shattering breakup in her early twenties, comedian Gabi Conti logged thousands of hours on dating apps, conducting research and gathering intel on our behalf. Real and relatable, this dating guide is laugh-out-loud funny without being prescriptive or cynical.• Each chapter focuses on a different type of guy and offers advice on how to deal, from The Guy Who's Great on Paper to The Guy Who Texts "sup" at 2 a.m.• Includes charts, quizzes, and "Boy Bingo"• Captures the frustrations, heartache, and hilarity of Tinder, Bumble, Hinge, OkCupid, and all other online dating appsFor the modern, app-using woman, this hilarious dating guide profiles 20 stereotypical men, from their physical appearance and dating style to red flags, tips, and success stories.Filled with charts and quizzes, hysterical anecdotes, and helpful insight from therapists and dating coaches, these pages offer advice and humor in equal measure.• Offers sincere advice to cope with dating app horror stories• Great for fans of How to Date Men When You Hate Men by Blythe Roberson, Bye Felipe: Disses, Dick Pics, and Other Delights of Modern Dating by Alexandra Tweten and HEY, U UP? (For a Serious Relationship) by Emily Axford and Brian Murphy