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This Little Baby
by Joyce SullivanA STAND-IN FATHERAfter his brother's death, Gil Boyer cared for a new mother and her child, his nephew. So when the young woman suddenly disappeared with the baby he'd come to love, Gil went to lady P.I. Paulina Stewart for help, thinking this an open-and-shut case. Then his sister-in-law turned up dead....Something about this big man's fierce devotion to the little baby touched Paulina's heart. Somebody had the child, and with Gil's help, she had to find the kidnapper. Paulina had an unblemished track record: she always solved the case-and she never got emotionally involved with a client.... Until Gil Boyer stepped into her office. He needed more than her professional support. He needed her.
This Little Kitty in the Garden
by Karen ObuhanychSpring is blooming, and what better way for rascally kittens to celebrate than by causing mischief in the garden in this charming picture book!Spring has sprung on Sakura Way.The five little kittles will garden today!Read along as these frisky felines plant seeds, pounce and play, claw and climb, and splish, splash and swirl—until they end their day asleep in the garden bed. Filled with bright and playful illustrations, here is an adorable picture book that introduces kids to the wonders of spring as they spend time in the garden with these delightful cats—all brimming with cattitude. Here is a picture book sure to charm cat lovers and kids alike.
This Little Light: A Novel
by Lori LansensThis brilliant new novel is an urgent bulletin from an all-too-believable near future in which the religious right has come out on top. And where a smart young girl who questions the new order is suddenly a terrorist. By the bestselling author of The Girls and The Mountain Story.Taking place over 48 hours in the year 2023, this is the story of Rory Ann Miller, on the run with her best friend because they are accused of bombing their posh Californian high school during an American Virtue Ball. There's a bounty on their heads, and a social media storm of trolls flying around them, not to mention a posse of law enforcement, attack helicopters and drones trying to track them down. Rory's mom, a social activist and lawyer, has been arrested and implicated in her daughter's "crimes" whereas her dad (who betrayed his wife and daughter in a nasty divorce) is cooperating with the authorities. The story exists in a universe of gated communities, born-again Christians, Probationary Citizens (once known as "Dreamers"), re-criminalized abortion and birth control, teenage virginity oaths and something called the Red Market, which is either a Conservative bogey-man created to further polarize the "base" or a criminal network making money from selling unwanted babies to whomever wants them and fetal tissue to cosmetics and drug companies. Rory is cynical and scared, furious and scathing, betrayed and looking for something or someone to trust. What she has to say about the dads and bosses and politicians lining up to keep women in their place, and about the ways women collaborate in their own undermining, is fierce, and funny, and sad, and true.
This Little Mommy Stayed Home
by Samantha WildeThe Mother of all Motherhood novels.In this riotously funny, ruefully honest, and irresistibly warmhearted debut, Samantha Wilde writes about one new mother who discovers the wonders and terrors of motherhood--one hilarious crisis at a time. For new moms, potential moms-to-be, and anyone who just wants to (wisely) live the experience vicariously...New mom Joy McGuire hasn't changed her sweatpants since her baby was born. Of course she's crazy about her newborn son; it's her distracted, work-obsessed husband and his impossible mother she can't stand. Joy turns to her own mom for support, but she's too busy planning her fourth wedding to a suspicious self-help guru. Sure, Joy's a woman on the brink, but it's nothing a little sleep, sanity, and chocolate can't fix.Until her old college boyfriend shows up at their ten-year reunion. The one she was still in love with when she married her husband. It must be the lack of sleep, because Joy is starting to think she might have ended up with the wrong man. Not to mention she's obsessed with her sexy yoga instructor, who might just be interested in her. Joy used to be single, skinny, and able to speak in complete sentences, but who is she now? As she's trying to figure that out, her husband goes missing....Frank, bawdy, and full of keenly self-aware observations, this novel tells the story of one new mother, three men, one marriage, and the baby love that keeps us up at nightFrom the Trade Paperback edition.
This Little Piggy
by James SerafinoIf You Give a Mouse a Cookie meets Stuck in this clever laugh-riot that honors an underrated superstar in kid-cuisine -- cereal -- and the girl who just can't eat enough of it . . . no matter how large a mess she leaves in her wake!"[A] buoyant tale of togetherness." --KirkusOnce there was a girl who only ate cereal. This kid LOVED cereal. But lots of cereal can make a BIG mess and get a girl in trouble. So she asks the dog for help cleaning up her crumbs, but the dog soon fills up. Then she asks a cat, but the cat only wants to nap. One after another, animals try to help...but the mess is too large!Then the girl meets a pig...Perfect for the fan of Dragons Love Tacos, If You Give a Mouse a Cookie, and Oliver Jeffers' Stuck.
This May End Badly
by Samantha Markum“The bitingly hilarious, heartfelt This May End Badly takes your favorite fake dating trope and adds plenty of downright delightful shenanigans that’ll have readers tearing through the pages.”—Emma Lord, New York Times bestselling author of You Have a MatchPranking mastermind Doe and her motley band of Weston girls are determined to win the century-long war against Winfield Academy before the clock ticks down on their senior year. But when their headmistress announces that The Weston School will merge with its rival the following year, their longtime feud spirals into chaos.To protect the school that has been her safe haven since her parents’ divorce, Doe puts together a plan to prove once and for all that Winfield boys and Weston girls just don’t mix, starting with a direct hit at Three, Winfield’s boy king and her nemesis. In a desperate move to win, Doe strikes a bargain with Three’s cousin, Wells: If he fake dates her to get under Three’s skin, she’ll help him get back his rightful family heirloom from Three.As the pranks escalate, so do her feelings for her fake boyfriend, and Doe spins lie after lie to keep up her end of the deal. But when a teacher long suspected of inappropriate behavior messes with a younger Weston girl, Doe has to decide what’s more important: winning a rivalry, or joining forces to protect something far more critical than a prank war legacy.This May End Badly is a story about friendship, falling in love, and crossing pretty much every line presented to you—and how to atone when you do.
This Might Be Too Personal: And Other Intimate Stories
by Alyssa ShelaskyA frisky, feminine, funny, and profoundly genuine essay collection on relationships, sex, motherhood, and finding yourself, by the editor of New York Magazine's Sex Diaries.Alyssa Shelasky has a lot to tell you.In this hilarious and intimate essay collection, Alyssa navigates life as a wild-hearted woman and her thrilling career as a sex, relationship, and celebrity writer in New York City. From double-booking an interview with Sarah Jessica Parker and an abortion appointment and unsuccessfully quitting sex and men entirely to have a baby via an anonymous sperm donor, to hooking up with a hot musician while eight months pregnant and then finding her life partner but vowing to never get married, Alyssa's essays paint a deeply genuine, romantic, and uproarious portrait of a woman who craves both love and lust, and refuses to settle or sacrifice her fierce inner-spirit, sometimes to her own regret and detriment. And she's not afraid to give you every single beautiful, messy, embarrassing, and emotional detail of her bleeding heart and busy bedroom.This Might Be Too Personal is like having (several) drinks with your best friend who has seen, heard, and done everything. Literally, everything. Told in a refreshing candor with jolts of humor, undeniable relatability, and irresistible energy, Alyssa’s book is the ultimate meditation on living an authentic life with big feelings, hard decisions, and the small victories and painful mistakes of motherhood, womanhood, and profound independence.
This Might Get a Little Heavy: A Memoir
by Ralphie May Nils ParkerThere was a time when Ralphie May was one of the biggest standup comedians in the country, both by ticket sales and by tonnage. While some things changed—Ralphie lost half his body weight—others did not: he will be remembered as one of the most successful comics of his time. Completed just months before his untimely passing, in This Might Get a Little Heavy, Ralphie takes readers on a behind-the-scenes tour of his life and career, one that winds across the country, over obstacles, beyond heartbreak, and through the golden age of stand-up.Raised in poor, rural, Arkansas by a single mom who struggled to make ends meet, Ralphie’s early years were the perfect breeding ground for the kind of pain and stress and adversity that only comedy can cure. Bitten by the comedy bug at a Methodist sleep-away camp when he was 12 years old, Ralphie seized a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity six years later at an open-mic in a pizza parlor. Mentored and inspired by legendary comedian Sam Kinison to move to Houston, where he got his start, Ralphie packed his bags and never looked back. A major headliner for over twenty-five years, in This Might Get A Little Heavy, Ralphie finally tells the world how a chubby poor kid from Clarksville went from Arkansas to Houston to Hollywood and beyond. Full of never before told stories from Ralphie’s life, This Might Get A Little Heavy will bust your gut, pull at your heart strings, and touch your soul.
This Modern Love
by Will DarbyshireIn the tradition of Post Secret and Other People’s Love Letters, a crowdsourced compilation of letters, stories, and art work about the modern state of love and relationships, edited by rising filmmaker and beloved YouTube vlogger Will Darbyshire.“What would you say to your ex, without judgment?” This is the question filmmaker and vlogger Will Darbyshire posed to hundreds of thousands of his closest friends on YouTube. Seeking closure after a tough break-up, Will was driven to strike up an intimate conversation with his online audience, and to get at the heart of one of life’s unknowable yet universal mysteries: love. Over a period of six months, Will posed a series of questions to his audience and asked them to reveal their innermost feelings about their own romantic experiences in the form of hand-written letters, poems, photographs, and emails. The result is a curated collection of responses that are, at turns, funny, dark, confessional, awkward, comforting, and uplifting. This Modern Love is a compelling portrait of individual desires, fantasies, resentments, and fears that reminds us that, whether we’re in or out of love, we’re not alone.
This Monster Cannot Wait!
by Bethany BartonIrrepressible Stewart the monster is back, and he has big news: He's going camping in five days! But if he could just change the clocks, build a time machine, or make this book move faster, he could go camping NOW. Of course, Stewart's parents know that good things come to those who wait – and eventually Stewart will learn that, too. In this hilarious follow-up to This Monster Needs a Haircut, Bethany Barton channels her inner preschooler and shows readers that even the most exuberant, enthusiastic, in-the-moment monsters can be persuaded to wait. Eventually.
This Monster Needs a Haircut
by Bethany BartonIntroducing a lovable monster with a hairy problem Stewart is a monster. He has wild, crazy, messy hair that's perfect for scaring, collecting spiders, and hiding after-school treats. But when Stewart's hair grows so long that things start getting lost in it, his parents decide it's time to intervene. Stewart disagrees. His hair is awesome! But when Stewart's hair keeps him from doing his very favorite thing, he realizes it might be time to reconsider. With slyly funny text and uproarious illustrations, this humorous account of a much-feared experience is a must-have for every monster--and every child, too.
This Moose Belongs to Me
by Oliver JeffersFrom the illustrator of the #1 smash hit The Day the Crayons Quit comes the age-old tale of a boy and his moose . . .Wilfred is a boy with rules. He lives a very orderly life. It's fortunate, then, that he has a pet who abides by rules, such as not making noise while Wilfred educates him on his record collection. There is, however, one rule that Wilfred's pet has difficulty following: Going whichever way Wilfred wants to go. Perhaps this is because Wilfred's pet doesn't quite realize that he belongs to anyone.A moose can be obstinate in such ways.Fortunately, the two manage to work out a compromise. Let's just say it involves apples.Oliver Jeffers, the bestselling creator of Stuck and The Incredible Book Eating Boy, delivers another deceptively simple book sure to make kids giggle.
This Movie Will Require Dinosaurs
by C. W. Neill"Wow, this book is good. Best I've ever read." - Steven Spielberg's neighbor's plumber "C.W.'s style is unmistakably hilarious!" - John Hollywood "I still can't believe he actually wrote all these!" - My buddy Randy With This Movie Will Require Dinosaurs, C.W. Neill provides a unique and rare glimpse into the psyche and creative process of a struggling screenwriter. From the most basic of introductory scenes, to gigantic blockbuster action films, C.W.'s imagination spans across all genres and emotions. And he's never even made it to page 2.
This Much Is True: A Novel (The Liars' Club #3)
by Vivienne LorretUSA Today bestselling author Vivienne Lorret returns with the third book in her Liars’ Club series with a sexy and hilarious romance about a thrill-seeking debutante and a highwayman who is more than he seems on the surface…Althea Hartley has lost her spark. As the youngest daughter of an eccentric family, playwrighting is in her blood. But two failed Seasons have left her disenchanted. In desperate need of inspiration, she takes matters into her own hands by creating a tale of a dashing highwayman. What could possibly go wrong?But her stories prove to be a little too true for the actual highwayman living beneath the tons’ nose.Jasper Trueblood, Viscount St. James, needs to put an end to the bewitching Miss Hartley’s incriminating tales. Society can never suspect that he isn’t the clumsy oaf he pretends to be. Or that, under the cover of darkness, he greets scoundrels and lightens their purses. Not too much. Just enough to keep those closest to him safe from his menacing uncle.Then sparks fly when this unlikely pair meets one perfect night. And while she is eager to unmask him, he is determined to stay hidden. But there’s no denying the chemistry that neither of them are able to resist…The only thing for certain is that Thea needs to guard her heart before the highwayman steals it.
This Much is True: 'There's never been a memoir so packed with eye-popping, hilarious and candid stories' DAILY MAIL
by Miriam MargolyesFrom Blackadder to Call the Midwife, from the Cadbury's Caramel Rabbit to Harry Potter, Miriam Margolyes is the outspoken great aunt (after two sherries) we all wish we had -- this is (at last) her extraordinary life story and it's well worth the wait.'There is no one on earth quite so wonderful' STEPHEN FRYAward-winning actor, creator of a myriad of memorable characters from Lady Whiteadder to Professor Sprout, Miriam Margolyes is a national treasure. Now, at last, at the age of 80, she has finally decided to tell her extraordinary life story. And it's far richer and stranger than any part she's played. Find out how being conceived in an air-raid gave her curly hair; what pranks led to her being known as the naughtiest girl Oxford High School ever had; how she ended up posing nude for Augustus John aged 17, being sent to Coventry by Monty Python and the Goodies and swearing on University Challenge (she was the first woman to say F*** on TV). This book is packed with unforgettable stories from why Bob Monkhouse was the best (male) kiss she's ever had to being told off by the Queen. With a cast list stretching from Scorsese to Streisand, Leonardo di Caprio to Isaiah Berlin, This Much is True is as warm and honest, as full of life and surprises, as she is.(P)2021 Hodder & Stoughton Limited
This Much is True: 'There's never been a memoir so packed with eye-popping, hilarious and candid stories' DAILY MAIL
by Miriam Margolyes'There is no one on earth quite so wonderful' STEPHEN FRY'As outrageously entertaining as you'd expect' Daily ExpressBAFTA-winning actor, voice of everything from Monkey to the Cadbury's Caramel Rabbit, creator of a myriad of unforgettable characters from Lady Whiteadder to Professor Sprout, MIRIAM MARGOLYES, OBE, is the nation's favourite (and naughtiest) treasure. Now, at the age of 80, she has finally decided to tell her extraordinary life story - and it's well worth the wait.Find out how being conceived in an air-raid gave her curly hair; what pranks led to her being known as the naughtiest girl Oxford High School ever had; how she ended up posing nude for Augustus John as a teenager; why Bob Monkhouse was the best (male) kiss she's ever had; and what happened next after Warren Beatty asked 'Do you fuck?' From declaring her love to Vanessa Redgrave to being told to be quiet by the Queen, this book is packed with brilliant, hilarious stories. With a cast list stretching from Scorsese to Streisand, a cross-dressing Leonardo di Caprio to Isaiah Berlin, This Much Is True is as warm and honest, as full of life and surprises, as its inimitable author.
This Much is True: 'There's never been a memoir so packed with eye-popping, hilarious and candid stories' DAILY MAIL
by Miriam Margolyes'There is no one on earth quite so wonderful' STEPHEN FRY'As outrageously entertaining as you'd expect' Daily ExpressBAFTA-winning actor, voice of everything from Monkey to the Cadbury's Caramel Rabbit, creator of a myriad of unforgettable characters from Lady Whiteadder to Professor Sprout, MIRIAM MARGOLYES, OBE, is the nation's favourite (and naughtiest) treasure. Now, at the age of 80, she has finally decided to tell her extraordinary life story - and it's well worth the wait.Find out how being conceived in an air-raid gave her curly hair; what pranks led to her being known as the naughtiest girl Oxford High School ever had; how she ended up posing nude for Augustus John as a teenager; why Bob Monkhouse was the best (male) kiss she's ever had; and what happened next after Warren Beatty asked 'Do you fuck?' From declaring her love to Vanessa Redgrave to being told to be quiet by the Queen, this book is packed with brilliant, hilarious stories. With a cast list stretching from Scorsese to Streisand, a cross-dressing Leonardo di Caprio to Isaiah Berlin, This Much Is True is as warm and honest, as full of life and surprises, as its inimitable author.
This Must Be the Place (Nick and Ben #2)
by Jane DariusA Nick and Ben StoryHaving explosive sex is easy for Nick and Ben—getting past their hang-ups and opening up to each other won’t be. Handsome New York City bartender Nick might’ve left life—and his abusive, homophobic father—in West Virginia far behind, but even though he was a star quarterback in high school, he can’t outrun the effect those years had on him. He’s still not comfortable as a gay man, and he keeps his relationships short… as in a single night. Hotel reviewer Ben is a hopeless romantic, but he can’t seem to find a guy who feels the same. After being cheated on again, he doesn’t expect to spend forever with Nick, but even their one-nighter doesn’t go off without a hitch. Ben falls asleep on Nick’s couch, and in the morning, they have to face their hookup that wasn’t…and the fact that there’s a connection between them whether they’re looking for one or not.
This Must Be the Place (Vintage Contemporaries Ser.)
by Maggie O'FarrellFrom the award-winning author of Hamnet and The Marriage Portrait: an irresistible novel about the collapse—and reawakening—of an unlikely marriage between an American professor and a reclusive actress.Daniel Sullivan, a young American professor reeling from a failed marriage and a brutal custody battle, is on vacation in Ireland when he falls in love with a world-famous actress who has fled fame for a rural village. Together, they make an idyllic life in the country, raising two more children in blissful seclusion—until a secret from Daniel's past threatens to destroy their meticulously constructed and fiercely protected home. Shot through with humour and wisdom, This Must Be the Place is a captivating story of love in the twenty-first century from &“one of the most exciting novelists alive&” (The Washington Post).
This Must Be the Place: A novel (Vintage Contemporaries)
by Maggie O'FarrellAn irresistible love story, an unforgettable family. Best-selling author Maggie O'Farrell captures an extraordinary marriage with insight and laugh-out-loud humor in what Richard Russo calls "her breakout book." Perfect for readers of Where'd You Go, Bernadette. Meet Daniel Sullivan, a man with a complicated life. A New Yorker living in the wilds of Ireland, he has children he never sees in California, a father he loathes in Brooklyn, and a wife, Claudette, who is a reclusive ex-film star given to pulling a gun on anyone who ventures up their driveway. Claudette was once the most glamorous and infamous woman in cinema before she staged her own disappearance and retreated to blissful seclusion in an Irish farmhouse. But the life Daniel and Claudette have so carefully constructed is about to be disrupted by an unexpected discovery about a woman Daniel lost touch with twenty years ago. This revelation will send him off-course, far away from wife, children, and home. Will his love for Claudette be enough to bring him back? "O'Farrell's prose manages to be both intimate and expansive and keenly perceptive in its insights about the complexities of marriage. Beautiful and bittersweet, THIS MUST BE THE PLACE will make O'Farrell's longtime fans swoon while prompting new readers to wonder why they've only just discovered her." --BookPage "I have been a huge fan of Maggie O'Farrell's novels for years. She writes with tremendous clarity and poise and in THIS MUST BE THE PLACE you are invested in what happens to Daniel and Claudette from the moment you meet them. A joy to read." --Jane Green "Inventive, moving, and hilarious. I loved it." --Rachel Joyce, best-selling author of The Unlikely Pilgrimage of Harold Fry From the Hardcover edition.
This Old Band
by Tamera Will Wissinger Matt LoveridgeWhat kinds of instruments would you imagine a band of cowboys playing? Surely nothing fancy, but they can still make do with what they have, like jugs, combs, boots, and whatever else they can find. Out on the open range, with no one to tell them to quit their hollerin', a cowboy band counts from ten to one in a tune children are familiar with. Silly phrases, toe-tapping rhythms, and the occasional twist make these cowpokes a great addition to any story time or bedtime lineup.Featuring a ragtag group of cowboys from author Tamera Will Wissinger, and colorful, offbeat illustrations by Matt Loveridge, This Old Band is sure to delight (and teach kids a few things about counting and noises) children and adults alike with a fun take on a popular nursery rhyme. A fun read-aloud for preschoolers and kindergarteners (ages 3 to 6), children will learn about various unusual instruments while learning the important skill of counting down from 10 to 1. Each page shows the number of band members that correspond with the number in the verse. Kids will be able to count them and also find hidden creatures throughout, making this an interactive story for bedtime, school, or anywhere. If parents or teachers are familiar with "This Old Man," they can even sing the book and teach it to their children for added interactive fun.
This Princess Kills Monsters: The Misadventures of a Fairy-Tale Stepsister: A Novel
by Ry HermanA princess with a mostly useless magical talent takes on horrible monsters, a dozen identical masked heroes, and a talking lion in a quest to save a kingdom—and herself—in this affectionate satire of the Grimm Brothers&’ fairy tale The Twelve Huntsmen.Someone wants to murder Princess Melilot. This is sadly normal.Melilot is sick of being ordered to go on dangerous quests by her domineering stepmother. Especially since she always winds up needing to be rescued by her more magically talented stepsisters. And now, she's been commanded to marry a king she&’s never met.When hideous spider-wolves attack her on the journey to meet her husband-to-be, she is once again rescued—but this time, by twelve eerily similar-looking masked huntsmen. Soon she has to contend with near-constant attempts on her life, a talking lion that sets bewildering gender tests, and a king who can't recognize his true love when she puts on a pair of trousers. And all the while, she has to fight her growing attraction to not only one of the huntsmen, but also her fiancé&’s extremely attractive sister.If Melilot can't unravel the mysteries and rescue herself from peril, kingdoms will fall. Worse, she could end up married to someone she doesn&’t love.
This Private Plot: An Oliver Swithin Mystery (Oliver Swithin Mysteries #3)
by Alan BeecheyIf a blackmail letter drives a man to suicide, is the sender guilty of murder?"Yes," says Oliver Swithin, author of bestselling Finsbury the Ferret children's stories and amateur sleuth, who is on holiday in an ancient village.A midnight streak with his naked girlfriend—Scotland Yard's Effie Strongitham—abruptly ends in the discovery of a corpse. Retired radiobroadcaster Dennis Breedlove has hanged himself from the old gibbet. Evidence suggests blackmail may have driven this celebrity to suicide. Irresistibly intrigued, Oliver believes discovering the dead man's secret will lead to the identity of the blackmailer. But in Britain today, when shame is a ticket to fame, why suicide? What if it wasn't?When the mystery abruptly turns inside out, black-clad strangers attack Oliver in the night. The Vicar behaves strangely. So do the village's five unmarried Bennet sisters, a mysterious monk, the persistent, self-effacing Underwood Tooth, and Oliver's Uncle Tim, Effie's superior at the Yard and a part-time Shakespearean actor. Plus Oliver's aunt and his mother. Who else might play a role in This Private Plot? Two William Shakespeares?It's time to put the laugh back into slaughter with the long-awaited third chapter in the career of Oliver Swithin. Yet under the clever wordplay and bawdy jokes lies an inventive and, yes, scholarly plot.
This Road Sucks: And Other Street Signs We Really Need
by Dan Consiglio Brad DemareaPut On Your Hazards and Read ThisThe very safety of our drivers is at stake. Our countries' drivers have grown restless behind the wheel-they've mastered texting, one knee driving, and can eat enormous burritos while navigating a dicey pass on a two-lane highway. Our current system of street signs is woefully out of touch and in danger of becoming completely irrelevant. What does merge mean to a college kid hauling ass in a Mustang, sexting his girlfriend while downing a Big Gulp? We need street signs that relate to the current driver, the driver of tomorrow, not the two-hands-on-the-wheel, signal-at-every-turn dinosaur. This book is your bible of the American road. You're welcome.
This School Year Will Be the BEST!
by Kay WintersOn the first day of school, new classmates are asked to share what they would most like to happen in the upcoming year. Some kids' hopes are familiar while others are off-the-wall. Whether it's looking good on picture day or skateboarding at school, everyone's wishes are shown in humorously exaggerated illustrations. As the first day draws to a close, there can be no doubt—this school year will definitely be the best!