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Worst Class Trip Ever

by Sandy Beech Jimmy Holder

SOS!! Think it would be fun to get stuck on a deserted island with the guy you sort of like? Well, try adding the girl who gets on your nerves big-time (and who's crushing on the same guy), the bossiest kid in school, your annoying little brother, and a bunch of other people. Oh, and have I mentioned that there's no way off this island, and no one knows where you are? Still sound great? Didn't think so. Now all I have to worry about is getting elected island leader while keeping my crush away from Little Miss Priss. Oh, and one other teeny-tiny little thing: surviving. Get me outta here!

Worst Date Ever (Rapid Reads)

by Melodie Campbell

Jennie has been a widow for two years. Her twelve-year-old son thinks it's about time she started dating, and so does her best friend, Angela. So with Angela's help, Jennie signs up to an online dating site. Within hours, she has several dates lined up for the week. Surely there will be one Prince Charming in the bunch. And if not, it's only one date, right? How bad could it be?

The Worst Day Ever!: Aliens! Spaceships! Poo-scented air fresheners!

by James Bishop

A funny space adventure for fans of Charlie Changes into a Chicken and The Spy Who Loved School Dinners.Meet Mylan - an ordinary blue alien. He's travelling the universe, looking for someone having a bad day, to help them. Meet Chloe. She's just stubbed her toe. Now she's being followed by an alien. Her day can only get better, right? WRONG. Every bad day begins with a stubbed toe. Mylan Bletzleburger's research proves this. But even he couldn't predict how Chloe's day would escalate from a sore foot to the entire Earth being swallowed up.Can Mylan and Chloe save the planet? Will Mylan ever pilot a cool spaceship? And will Tanka Tanka Woo Woo, the Queen of the Universe, ever share her haircare secrets?Funny and packed with action and quirky aliens, this intergalactic adventure is out of this world!

The Worst Dudes

by Aubrey Sitterson

A dirty cop, a drugged-up back-up dancer, and an angsty adolescent god; the absolute worst dudes in the galaxy are on a raunch-filled hunt for a missing pop star.It's a hilarious, aggressively weird, willfully vulgar graphic novel detective story from noted reprobates Aubrey Sitterson (No One Left to Fight, The Comic Book Story of Professional Wrestling) and Tony Gregori (Deuce of Hearts, Karma Police). Collecting issues #1-5 of this raunchy, off-the-wall tale!

The Worst Gig

by Jon Niccum

"WORST GIG is Music Appreciation 225, taught by that cool professor everyone wanted to have beers with after class. One fun nugget after another. It was harder to close than my Twitter app."--Matthew James, McSweeney's "Tawdry tales of concert catastrophes!"--Buzzfeed "Musicians' 'Worst Gig' makes for best read ever."--Salon What is the worst show you've ever played? Sometimes the worst shows inspire the best stories. After hundreds of interviews with national headliners and beloved indie acts alike, entertainment journalist Jon Niccum has crafted a collection that chronicles the most embarrassing, most hilarious and most insane live show moments ever. THE WORST GIG features outrageous stories from stars such as Wilco, Def Leppard, Tenacious D, Rush, John Mayer, and The Sex Pistols. Be it nature's wrath, equipment breakdowns or even military intervention, get the wild scoop on what really happened, straight from the artists themselves.

The Worst Girlfriend in the World

by Sarra Manning

Alice Jenkins is the worst girlfriend in the world according to the many, many boys who've shimmied up lampposts and shoplifted from New Look to impress her, only to be dumped when she gets bored of them. Alice has a very low boredom threshold. But she never gets bored with Franny, her best friend since they met at nursery school. Friends are for ever. Ain't nothing going to come between them. Girls rule, boys drool is their motto. Well, it's Alice's motto, Franny doesn't have much time for boys; they're all totes immature and only interested in one thing. But then there's Louis Allen, lead singer of Thee Desperadoes, the best band in Merrycliffe-on-sea (though that could be because they're the only band in Merrycliffe-on-sea). He's a tousle-haired, skinny-jeaned, sultry-eyed manchild, the closest thing that Franny's ever seen to the hipsters that she's read about on the internet and she's been crushing on him HARD for the last three years. She's never worked up the courage to actually speak to him but she's sure on some deeper level that goes beyond mere words, Louis absolutely knows that she's his soulmate. He just doesn't know that he knows it yet. It's why he cops off with so many other girls. So, when Alice, bored with callow youths, sets her sights on Louis it threatens to tear the girls' friendship apart, even though they're better than fighting over a boy. They strike a devil's deal - may the best girl win. Best friends become bitter rivals and everything comes to an explosive conclusion on their first trip to London. Can true friendship conquer all?

The Worst Girlfriend in the World

by Sarra Manning

Alice Jenkins is the worst girlfriend in the world according to the many, many boys who've shimmied up lampposts and shoplifted from New Look to impress her, only to be dumped when she gets bored of them. Alice has a very low boredom threshold.But she never gets bored with Franny, her best friend since they met at nursery school. Friends are for ever. Ain't nothing going to come between them. Girls rule, boys drool is their motto. Well, it's Alice's motto, Franny doesn't have much time for boys; they're all totes immature and only interested in one thing.But then there's Louis Allen, lead singer of Thee Desperadoes, the best band in Merrycliffe-on-sea (though that could be because they're the only band in Merrycliffe-on-sea). He's a tousle-haired, skinny-jeaned, sultry-eyed manchild, the closest thing that Franny's ever seen to the hipsters that she's read about on the internet and she's been crushing on him HARD for the last three years.She's never worked up the courage to actually speak to him but she's sure on some deeper level that goes beyond mere words, Louis absolutely knows that she's his soulmate. He just doesn't know that he knows it yet. It's why he cops off with so many other girls.So, when Alice, bored with callow youths, sets her sights on Louis it threatens to tear the girls' friendship apart, even though they're better than fighting over a boy. They strike a devil's deal - may the best girl win. Best friends become bitter rivals and everything comes to an explosive conclusion on their first trip to London.Can true friendship conquer all?

Worst. Holiday. Ever. (Worst. Holiday. Ever.)

by Charlie Higson

A hilarious new book from the bestselling children's author - Adrian Mole for the new generation!*'Made me cry with laughter and my heart ache' Lisa Thompson, author of The Goldfish Boy**'Funniest. Book. Ever' Ross Welford, author of Time Travelling with a Hamster*Stan is going on holiday to Italy with his (fifth) best friend Felix and a load of strangers.Stan is absolutely terrified.Luckily, his mum's given him an emergency list that includes how to survive a shark attack, and what to do if he gets kidnapped.Stan thinks that a better list would include how to cope with odd food, and what to do if he accidentally calls Felix's mum 'mum' in front of everybody.And it soon turns out Italy is full of dangers and things that can go wrong.One thing's for certain, Stan's not going to come back the same boy he left. He just hope he comes back at all . . .Worst. Holiday. Ever is a story about facing fears, dealing with worries, and how it's OK to be anxious, scared, and sometimes a little bit brave.

Worst Ideas Ever: A Celebration of Embarrassment

by Jason Tomaszewski Daniel B. Kline

From memorable disasters such as New Coke, the XFL, and Tiger Woods' marriage to less-remembered failures such as Yugo, Cop Rock, and Microsoft's BOB, Worst Ideas Ever revisits history's biggest blunders. Whether it's a pop culture failure the likes of Dennis Miller's disastrous run on Monday Night Football, a political one such as John Edwards' odd decision to run for president while cheating on his cancer-stricken wife, or a technological misstep such as Apple's Newton OS, Worst Ideas Ever uncovers the ridiculous stories behind mistakes so huge, you'll have to constantly remind yourself that they actually happened. Moving from Mariah Carey's "performance" in Glitter to the Minnesota Vikings decision to trade away their future for an aging Herschel Walker, Worst Ideas Ever offers the real stories behind some of the dumbest things ever done. Whether it was ego (Michael Jordan leaving basketball for baseball), greed (nobody questioning their impossibly high returns when investing with Bernie Madoff) or simple stupidity ( Jay Leno moving to 10 p.m.), Worst Ideas Ever brings it all back in hilarious detail.

Worst in Show

by Anna E. Collins

Best in Show meets You&’ve Got Mail in this rivals-to-lovers romcom following a woman ready to do whatever it takes to save her grandpa&’s shop—even if that means training a wild pup for a dog show, side-by-side with her greatest rival. Aspiring fashion designer Cora Lewis should have known better. Entering her grandpa&’s extremely adorable—and totally unruly—pups in a dog show? What was she thinking? Oh, right. Her grandpa is injured, his beloved pet shop is losing the fight against the upscale dog boutique across the street, and his business and home are on the line. She needs that prize money to save the day—and if the only way to win is to train with her strongest adversary, then she&’ll suck it up and ask for help. Rival store owner Leo Salinger is everything Cora is not: successful, wealthy, and overly ambitious. She would never guess that he is also the kind and witty pen pal she's met on a local message board. But somewhere between teaching pups to heel, fetch, and stay, Cora and Leo are finding a little competition can ignite a serious attraction. Can they stop this sexy spark . . . before all her dreams go to the dogs?

The Worst Mascot Ever (The Big Idea Gang)

by James Preller

Four friends put their heads together to convince their school to get a new mascot in The Big Idea Gang—an exciting new chapter book series about making a case . . . and making a difference! Quick-thinking third-graders Lizzy, her twin, Connor, and their friends Kym and Deon have a big idea: their school desperately needs a new mascot, and they've got the perfect one in mind. Now they have to figure out a way to convince their principal and rally the rest of the school behind them. Luckily, their teacher, Miss Zips (short for Zipsokowski—but who can say that?) is skilled in the art of persuasion. Armed with Miss Zips's persuasive tips, the gang of four set out to make their claim, build a case for a new mascot, and convince Clay Elementary that Arnold the Armadillo has had his day.

The Worst Night Ever (Class Trip #2)

by Dave Barry

Last year, Wyatt Palmer was the hero of middle school, having foiled a plot against the president of the United States. But now he and his friends are in Coral Cove High School -- home of the Fighting Conchs -- and Wyatt is no longer a hero: He's just another undersized freshman, hoping to fit in, or at least not be unpopular. Things start to go wrong when Matt Diaz, who is Wyatt's best friend but also unfortunately an idiot, decides to bring his pet ferret, Frank, to school. Through an unfortunate series of events Frank ends up in the hands of the Bevin brothers, who are the most popular boys at Coral Cove High, but are also, as Matt soon discovers, the nastiest. When Wyatt and Matt try to get Frank back, they concoct a plan to attend a party for the cool clique at the Bevin's waterfront mansion and stumble onto the Bevin family's dark and deadly secret. That's when Wyatt learns that some things are worse than being unpopular in high school. MUCH worse.

The Worst Night Ever (Class Trip Ser.)

by Dave Barry Grzegorz Krysinski

Last year, Wyatt Palmer was the hero of middle school, having foiled a plot against the president of the United States. But now he and his friends are in Coral Cove High School-home of the Fighting Conchs-and Wyatt is no longer a hero: He's just another undersized freshman, hoping to fit in, or at least not be unpopular. Things start to go wrong when Matt Diaz, who is Wyatt's best friend but also unfortunately an idiot, decides to bring his pet ferret, Frank, to school. Through an unfortunate series of events Frank ends up in the hands of the Bevin brothers, who are the most popular boys at Coral Cove High, but are also, as Matt soon discovers, the nastiest. When Wyatt and Matt try to get Frank back, they concoct a plan to attend a party for the cool clique at the Bevin's waterfront mansion and stumble onto the Bevin family's dark and deadly secret. That's when Wyatt learns that some things are worse than being unpopular in high school. MUCH worse.

The Worst Noel

by Collected Authors Of The Worst Noel

Does the thought of mistletoe give you hives?Does the sound of jingling bellsinstill fear in your heart?Do you hide under the covers from the day after Thanksgiving till New Year's Day?And even if you love Christmas, do thehyperconsumerism, overindulgence, andtinsel-covered everything make you crazy?If you said yes to any of these questions, this is the book for you. You are not alone. Everyone has a Christmas-nightmare story to tell. Some of the best writers around have gone through some of the worst Christmases ever. Their tales of holly-draped horror are gathered here for your amusement, from NEAL POLLACK's Christmas-ham disaster to the accidental Santahood of JONI RODGERS to BINNIE KIRSHENBAUM's receiving what may be the worst gift ever given. And Stanley Bing gives us a peek at the lonely guy's Xmas feast. All this, plus many more recollections of Worst Noels past.So pour yourself a glass of eggnog, chisel off a piece of rock-hard fruitcake, and curl up in the big comfy chair by the fireplace where the stockings have been hung with such care -- and settle in to read The Worst Noel.

The Worst of Sports

by Jesse Lamovsky Matthew Rosetti Charlie Demarco

TAKE THEM OUT OF THE BALL GAME–PLEASE! From star running back Bryon “Bam” Morris’s interesting (and totally illegal) sideline career to the 1950s Kansas City A’s sneaky relationship with the New York Yankees; from French golfer Jean Van de Velde’s epic choke on 18 at the 1999 British Open to the infamous Cleveland Ten-Cent Beer Night riot of 1974; from Hungary’s bloody 1956 Olympic water polo match with the Soviet Union to the definitive analysis of basketball coach Larry Brown’s sartorial evolution and...

Worst. Person. Ever.

by Douglas Coupland

Douglas Coupland's gloriously filthy, side-splittingly funny and unforgettable new novel, his first full-length work of fiction in four years.Worst. Person. Ever. is a deeply unworthy book about a dreadful human being with absolutely no redeeming social value. Raymond Gunt, in the words of the author, "is a living, walking, talking, hot steaming pile of pure id." He's a B-unit cameraman who enters an amusing downward failure spiral that takes him from London to Los Angeles and then on to an obscure island in the Pacific where a major American TV network is shooting a Survivor-style reality show. Along the way, Gunt suffers multiple comas and unjust imprisonment, is forced to reenact the "Angry Dance" from the movie Billy Elliot and finds himself at the centre of a nuclear war. We also meet Raymond's upwardly failing sidekick, Neal, as well as Raymond's ex-wife, Fiona, herself "an atomic bomb of pain." Even though he really puts the "anti" in anti-hero, you may find Raymond Gunt an oddly likeable character.

Worst. Person. Ever.

by Douglas Coupland

A razor-sharp portrait of a morally bankrupt and gleefully wicked modern man, Worst. Person. Ever. is Douglas Coupland's gloriously filthy, side-splittingly funny and unforgettable new novel. Meet Raymond Gunt. A decent chap who tries to do the right thing. Or, to put it another way, the worst person ever: a foul-mouthed, misanthropic cameraman, trailing creditors, ex-wives and unhappy homeless people in his wake. Men dislike him, women flee from him. Worst. Person. Ever. is a deeply unworthy book about a dreadful human being with absolutely no redeeming social value. Gunt, in the words of the author, "is a living, walking, talking, hot steaming pile of pure id. " He's a B-unit cameraman who enters an amusing downward failure spiral that takes him from London to Los Angeles and then on to an obscure island in the Pacific where a major American TV network is shooting a Survivor-style reality show. Along the way, Gunt suffers multiple comas and unjust imprisonment, is forced to re-enact the 'Angry Dance' from the movie Billy Elliot and finds himself at the centre of a nuclear war. We also meet Raymond's upwardly failing sidekick, Neal, as well as Raymond's ex-wife, Fiona, herself 'an atomic bomb of pain'. Even though he really puts the 'anti' in anti-hero, you may find Raymond Gunt an oddly likeable character.

Worst. Superhero. Ever (Worst. Holiday. Ever.)

by Charlie Higson

Stan has found himself a starring role as superhero in a popular TV show.He’s absolutely terrified.After surviving a holiday to Italy without his parents (which included jellyfish and giant watermelons), Stan reckons he deserves a bit of a break. Or at a least a break in between trying to act in his school play.But when he’s offered the chance to take a tour around a TV studio, he thinks it can’t do any harm.How wrong he is.Before Stan can say ‘Boy of Steel’ he’s landed himself a part as a main character in one of the most well-known TV shows there is – as a brainy superhero.Convinced he’s going to embarrass himself in front of millions of people – and worried about leaving his friends to face a school play on their own – can Stan find a way to use his new-found fame for good?Or will he be the Worst. Superhero. Ever . . .

The Worst Things in Life Are Also Free (Dear Dumb Diary #10)

by Jim Benton

Bestselling author Jamie Kelly is back with an all-new, all-funny diary! But she has no idea that anybody is reading it. So please, please, please don't tell her.School's out for the summer, and that means no more Meat Loaf Thursdays, Sunday homework-cramming, or teachers (way way unsuccessfully) trying to act cool. It also means that certain Mackerel Middle Schoolers have a lot of time on their hands . . . and seriously empty pockets. Isabella is going to change all that. And Jamie and Angeline are going to help --- whether they like it or not. It's the best kind of teamwork: When a whole bunch of people work together to do something wrong, instead of doing it wrong one at a time.

Worst Week Ever! Friday (Worst Week Ever! #5)

by Matt Cosgrove Eva Amores

Have YOU ever had a bad week? The hilarious new series taking the world by storm. He&’s fallen down a giant hole, he&’s plummeted down to the very depths, he&’s TRAPPED underground in the darkest, dingiest, most abysmal abyss. Justin Chase is having the WORST WEEK EVER! There&’s no bright side this time as Justin must blindly face what lies below, be it friend, foe or fatberg... Against all odds, he survived the trials and torments of Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday AND Thursday, but now it's ... FRIDAY!The fifth book in the hilarious new seven-part highly-illustrated series for fans of Tom Gates, Diary of a Wimpy Kid and the Treehouse series.

Worst Week Ever! Monday (Worst Week Ever! Ser.)

by Matt Cosgrove Eva Amores

Have YOU ever had a bad week? Start Monday with a bang in the hilarious new series taking the world by storm. His mum just married a vampire, his dad is driving a giant toilet on wheels, and his cat&’s been abducted by aliens (probably). Justin Chase is having the WORST WEEK EVER! And that&’s all before he&’s even started his first day at a brand-new school. At least he has the perfect chance to show off his prowess in the swimming pool, right? Maybe not... As right now, he's dangling off the edge of a 10-metre-high diving tower in front of his entire class wearing nothing but rapidly disappearing crocheted trunks! And it's only... MONDAY! The first book in the hilarious new seven-part highly-illustrated series for fans of Tom Gates, Diary of a Wimpy Kid and the Treehouse series.

Worst Week Ever! Thursday (Worst Week Ever! #4)

by Matt Cosgrove Eva Amores

Have YOU ever had a bad week? The hilarious new series taking the world by storm. He&’s dressed up like a clown on national TV, his worst enemy is stealing the limelight, and there's definitely something weird happening with everyone's cats! Justin Chase is having the WORST WEEK EVER! At least he's found a new BFF in international pop sensation, teen heartthrob and Justin&’s name twin, Justin Chase, right? Maybe not... As a case of mistaken identity leads to a disastrous kidnapping and Justin forced to race against the clock (and the ferocious dog) to escape! Monday was mortifying, Tuesday was tumultuous, Wednesday was wild, but now it's... THURSDAY! The fourth book in the hilarious new seven-part highly-illustrated series for fans of Tom Gates, Diary of a Wimpy Kid and the Treehouse series.

Worst Week Ever! Tuesday (Worst Week Ever! Ser.)

by Matt Cosgrove Eva Amores

Have YOU ever had a bad week? The hilarious new series taking the world by storm. His cat has been abducted by aliens, his dad is dating his new head teacher, and he&’s unexpectedly gone viral online in the most embarrassing way. Justin Chase is having the WORST WEEK EVER! At least his new-found inter-fame (or inter-shame) won't stand in the way of getting the perfect school photo, right? Maybe not... As the school&’s Super Science Spectacular is destined to blow up into a hair-raising, teeth-shattering disaster of epic proportions! He barely made it through Monday, but now it&’s... Tuesday! The second book in the hilarious new seven-part highly-illustrated series for fans of Tom Gates, Diary of a Wimpy Kid and the Treehouse series.

Worst Week Ever! Wednesday (Worst Week Ever! #3)

by Matt Cosgrove Eva Amores

Have YOU ever had a bad week? The hilarious new series taking the world by storm. His cat is still missing, he&’s an unintentional internet sensation, and now he&’s trapped in a serious S.O.S situation with his unbelievably annoying archenemy! Justin Chase is having the WORST WEEK EVER! At least there&’s the chance of this totally abandoned island being home to hordes of secret treasure, right? Maybe not... As the island seems only to house terrifying sharks, petrifying pirates and anything capable of chilling Justin right down to his bones! Monday was messy, Tuesday was an embarrassment, but now it&’s... WEDNESDAY! The third book in the hilarious new seven-part highly-illustrated series for fans of Tom Gates, Diary of a Wimpy Kid and the Treehouse series.

The Worst Witch

by Jill Murphy

Mildred Hubble is the worst witch at Miss Cackle's Academy for Witches she's always getting her spells wrong. But she manages to get by until she turns Ethel, the teacher's pet, into her deadly enemy ISBN 978-0-14-131450-1

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