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Uh-oh, Cleo: Underpants on My Head
by Jessica Harper Jon BerkeleyIn the Small family, it?s best to expect the unexpected? six kids make for a lot of surprises?but who would ever imagine getting caught in a snowstorm in August? When the whole crew goes to visit Grandma in Colorado and Cleo, Jack, and Jenna go on a mountain camping trip with Mom and Dad, that?s exactly what happens. With lots of family fun, silly songs by Mom and creative problem solving, kids will be glad to laugh along with Cleo and her family?s ?Small disasters.?
Uh-oh Cleo: I Barfed on Mrs. Kenly
by Jessica Harper Jon BerkeleyAn icky uh-oh moment makes for an entertaining story. Cleo has been bonked on the head by an avalanche of toys and had to wear underwear for a hat in a snowstorm, but nothing compares to the trauma of barfing on Mrs. Kenly?s fur coat. On the way to a birthday party, a combination of carsickness and too many pancakes turns Cleo green in the face, and before anything can be done, her friend?s mom?s fancy coat is a big, barfy mess. Cleo has never been so mortified, but kind grown-ups and good friends soon make her feel as if nothing even happened.
Uh-Oh, Rollo! (Rollo)
by Reed DuncanFor fans of Tiny, Biscuit, and Charlie the Ranch Dog comes an easy-to-read series about a rambunctious, mischievous, and totally lovable bulldog, Rollo!Rollo is a good dog.But sometimes he does thingsthat get him into trouble.Meet Rollo, a little bulldog with a BIG personality. Rollo loves to dig, but sometimes he digs too much. He loves to chase things, but sometimes he chases things he should not--like a chipmunk that's heading for a wall! Follow Rollo for an action packed day as he gets in--and always out, of course--of trouble. With easy-to-read vocabulary and lively illustrations, this book is perfect for progressing readers.
UK and Irish Television Comedy: Representations of Region, Nation, and Identity (Palgrave Studies in Comedy)
by Mary Irwin Jill MarshallThis book looks at television comedy, drawn from across the UK and Ireland, and ranging chronologically from the 1980s to the 2020s. It explores depictions of distinctive geographical, historical and cultural communities presented from the insiders’ perspective, simultaneously interrogating the particularity of the lived experience of time, and place, embedded within the wide variety of depictions of contrasting lives, experiences and sensibilities, which the collected individual chapters offer. Comedies considered include Victoria Wood’s work on ‘the north’, Ireland’s Father Ted and Derry Girls, Michaela Coel’s east London set Chewing Gum, and Wales’ Gavin and Stacey. There are chapters on Scottish sketch and animation comedy, and on series set in the Midlands, the North East, the South West and London’s home counties. The book offers thoughtful reflection on funny and engaging representations of the diverse, fragmented complexity of UK and Irish identity explored through the intersections of class, ethnicity and gender.
Ulrich Haarbürste's Novel of Roy Orbison in Clingfilm: Plus additional stories
by Ulrich Haarbürste"The sunlight glints on the translucent triumph of science. The faint rasp as I unspool it sends delirious brightly colored butterflies flocking through my stomach. I am like a tailor of the elves bedecking him in a shimmering suit of some magical material. Soon, Roy Orbison stands before all of Düsseldorf wrapped up in clingfilm. Silent white light floods my whole being and I become one with the universe." Just as the avant-garde artists Christo and Jeanne-Claude employed cloth to drape prominent buildings, Ulrich Haarbürste has adopted plastic wrap—or clingfilm—as his medium. His focus, however, is no inanimate landmark; it's the popular music icon Roy Orbison. In this singular novel, Haarbürste relates a series of encounters with the legendary musician that culminate with the former wrapping the latter from head to toe in clingfilm, to the author's immense satisfaction. "This novel may appear to cater to specialised tastes. But it is highly recommended to nonfetishists, who will find it inventively hilarious," noted The Guardian. This edition includes several related short stories, and as the author modestly observes, "Not to speak boastfully, but it is perhaps the only book you will ever need to own on the subject of wrapping Roy Orbison in clingfilm."
A última carta
by Cecelia AhernA aguardada sequela do fenómeno romântico mundial P. S. Eu amo-te (mais de 1 milhão de exemplares vendidos) Quando o amor é eterno, há sempre algo mais para dizer Faz sete anos que o marido de Holly Kennedy morreu - seis, desde que ela leu a sua última carta, na qual lhe pedia que encontrasse coragem para forjar uma nova vida. Holly orgulha-se da forma como tem evoluído e crescido. Até que recebe a mensagem: "Precisamos desesperadamente da sua ajuda, Holly. Estamos a ficar sem ideias e ... " - ela respira fundo, em busca de energia - "#todos nós estamos a ficar sem tempo." Os membros do Clube P. S. Eu amo-te, inspirados nas últimas cartas do seu marido, Gerry, querem que Holly os ajude a escrever as suas próprias mensagens de despedida para os que lhes são queridos. Holly vê-se atraída, de novo, para um mundo que se esforçou tanto por deixar para trás. Relutante, começa a relacionar-se com o clube, mesmo quando a amizade deles ameaça destruir a paz que ela acredita ter alcançado. Porque cada uma dessas pessoas espera de Holly a ajuda para deixar algo significativo àqueles que mais ama, ela embarcará numa jornada notável que a desafiará a questionar se abraçar o futuro implicar trair o passado e o que significa amar alguém para sempre ... Os elogios da crítica: «Uma história maravilhosa, encorajadora e comovente que vai pôr os leitores a chorar, mas os deixará, sem dúvida, de alma cheia.»Irish Independent «Tocante, cheio de humor... vital. Ahern escreve com honestidade e empatia. Senti um nó na garganta quando terminei de ler.»Irish Times «Explora, com carinho, humor e emoção, uma das experiências fundamentais humanas.»Sunday Independent «Cecelia Ahern é, sem dúvida, uma contadora de histórias incrivelmente talentosa. Comovente, agridoce e muito bem escrito.»RTE Guide «Este livro, como o primeiro, falou directamente ao meu coração. Talvez seja a forma realista e a simplicidade das observações de Ahern que o torna tão impactante.»Irish News «Os fãs de PS Eu te amo, estão com sorte. O calor emana das páginas deste romance adorável e inspirador.»Good Housekeeping «Um romance comovente, terno e positivo.»Woman & Home «Sábio e inspirador - mas mantenha uma caixa de lenços de papel à mão. Vai precisar.»Sunday Express «Adorei esta história inspiradora sobre esperança e amor.»Prima «Este é um romance para encantar os fãs fiéis e os novos leitores.»Woman's Weekly
Última oportunidad
by Carol Higgins Clark Mary Higgins ClarkSterling Brooks no ha tenido una vida ejemplar. Por ello lleva esperando más de cincuenta años en la antesala del cielo. Unos días antes de Navidad, el consejo celestial decide proponerle un trato: entrará en el cielo si antes consigue hacer una buena obra en la tierra. Se trata de su última oportunidad. No le especifican cuál es su misión, y de pronto se ve en pleno Rockefeller Center, en medio de una multitud de patinadores, en busca de alguien que necesite un ángel. Así encuentra a Marissa, una niña de siete años, apenada por la desaparición de su padre y su abuela, que se han visto obligados a entrar en un programa de protección de testigos para escapar de los hermanos Badgett, unos peligrosos criminales que han puesto precio a sus cabezas. Sterling deberá trazar un plan para eliminar la amenaza de los gángsteres y reunir a Marissa con sus seres queridos.
Las últimas vueltas de cuerda intestinal: una historia de pollos, huevos y lo que sigue
by Steve VernonLe pides a la mesera huevos y tocino y te trae un plato con un pollo vivo en el - plumas y pico y toda la mina! [Las últimas vueltas de la cuerda intestinal: una historia de pollos, huevos y lo que sigue] Responsabilidad completa - esta tiene que ser una de las historias más raras que he escrito, y je escrito BASTANTES viejas historias raras. Sólo imagina que te encuentras con la vieja cuchara grasosa de un viejo comedor cursi, del tipo que debería brindar anti ácido junto con una servilleta, cuchillo y tenenedor. Le pides a la mesera huevo y tocino y te trae un plato con un pollo vivo en el. Me refiero a plumas y pico y la mina entera. Sólo piensa en una mezcla de Kafka y O'Henry y estas cerca de la marca. Si quieres descubrir que sigue, entonces deberías escoger esta historia y darle una leída. Te garantizo que es libre de colesterol. Anda y lee esta historia. Te reto. ¿Eres un pollo?
The Ultimate Betrayal (Wedlocked! #1799)
by Michelle ReidRead this classic, passionate romance from USA TODAY bestselling author Michelle Reid, now available for the first time in e-book!A marriage in crisis…“I never meant to do it… she was just there when I needed someone…” Rachel and Daniel had three adorable children and a strong marriage—or so Rachel had always believed. But her happy life was shattered when she was told that Daniel had been having an affair.Then she realized that they’d been growing apart for years. Rachel wants so much to save her marriage—but is it too late? Can she ever forgive Daniel, if he has committed the ultimate betrayal?Originally published in 1995
The Ultimate Book of Blonde, Brunette, and Redhead Jokes
by James BuffingtonAS SHAMELESS AND HILARIOUS AS IT IS POLITICALLY INCORRECTWhat's the mating call of a blonde?"I'm sooooo drunk."How does a brunette recharge her love life?She changes the batteries.How is a redhead like a condom?They both spend most of their time in your wallet.Why did 18 blondes go to the movies together?The sign said: "Under seventeen not admitted."What does a redhead scream when climaxing?Her own name.Why does Ohio have brunettes and California have earthquakes?California had first choice.Why did the blonde sell her water skis?She couldn't find a lake on a hillside.
The Ultimate Book of Dad Jokes: 1,001+ Punny Jokes Your Pops Will Love Telling Over and Over and Over . . .
by Gordon Hideaki NagaiA MASSIVE COLLECTION OF LAUGHABLE, CHEESY JOKES PERFECT FOR AMUSING DADS WHILE SLIGHTLY EMBARRASSING THE KIDS As groan-inducing as they are hilarious, dad jokes are the punny one-liners and oh-so-clever quips fathers never tire of telling. With this massive collection, no Dad will ever lack new material to make his kids facepalm: • A watermelon and a honeydew wanted to get married right away, but they cantaloupe. • After Humpty Dumpty recovered from his fall, he was just a shell of his former self. • Sign language interpreters have to lean sideways to translate something in italics. • Anyone with a wheat allergy that routinely eats pasta is just a gluten for punishment. • A chord walked into a bar and ordered a drink. The bartender said, &“We don&’t serve minors.&”
The Ultimate Book of Insults: A Handbook of Abuse, Snubs, Taunts, and Put-Downs
by Geoff TibballsA brilliant collection of insults and sharp retorts for every situation. Includes studied insults, wry putdowns, literary, political, and dramatic rebukes, playground insults, barbs and jibes. The perfect resource for responding to life's slings and arrows with humour and satisfying venom.
The Ultimate Book of Insults: A Handbook of Abuse, Snubs, Taunts, and Put-Downs
by Geoff TibballsA brilliant collection of insults and sharp retorts for every situation. Includes studied insults, wry putdowns, literary, political, and dramatic rebukes, playground insults, barbs and jibes. The perfect resource for responding to life's slings and arrows with humour and satisfying venom.
Ultimate Book of Jokes: The Essential Collection of More Than 1,500 Jokes
by Scott McNeelyWhether you re making a toast at a wedding, trying to break the ice at a party, or just want to make your boss giggle, the Ultimate Book of Jokes is the first and last resource you'll ever need. From road-crossing chickens and classic knock knock jokes to the naughty, nice, and totally soused, no subject goes unmocked in this collection of over 1,500 jokes, packaged in a deluxe embossed board cover with 2-color line art throughout. Scott McNeeley, author of Ultimate Book of Card Games, mined decades worth of jokes to find chuckle-inducing punch lines for joke lovers of all stripes from yo mamma aficionados to naughty limerick connoisseurs.
The Ultimate Book of Top Ten Lists: A Mind-Boggling Collection of Fun, Fascinating and Bizarre Facts on Movies, Music, Sports, Crime, Celebrities, History, Trivia and More
by Jami FraterA collection of obscure facts, impressive achievements, despicable crimes, bizarre records, unforgettable films and more from the authors of listverse.com.Discover bizarre facts, amazing trivia, astonishing mysteries, natural wonders, little-known people, useful tips and much more in this mammoth bathroom reader. From crime, movies and music to science, history and literature, this book offers an incredible array of intriguing top-ten lists, including:• Urban Legends—Debunked• Influential People Who Never Lived• Ancient Methods of Execution• Poisonous Foods We Love to Eat• Inventions of the Middle Ages• Gruesome Fairytale Origins• Secret Societies• Amazing Film Swordfights• Bizarre Animal Mating Rituals• Misconceptions About Evolution• Tips for Frugal Living• Fascinating Graveyards You Must See
The Ultimate Book of Useless Information
by Noel BothamBigger, better, and more useless than ever! In their groundbreakingly useless book, The Book of Useless Information, the members of the Useless Information Society proved that knowledge doesn't have to be useful to be entertaining. Now they present a new collection of their most fascinating, hilarious, and wholly trivial findings. The Ultimate Book of Useless Information includes such "did you knows" as: - Peanuts are one of the ingredients in dynamite - The average person spends two weeks of their life kissing - And giraffes have no vocal cords
The Ultimate Book of Zombie Warfare and Survival: A Combat Guide to the Walking Dead
by Scott KenemoreThe Gory Guide to the Walking DeadWhile most people know what zombies look like, do they actually know how they act? What they do during their spare time? What their work ethic is? Probably not.Enter The Ultimate Book of Zombie Warfare and Survival. From bestselling zombie author Scott Kenemore, learn all the tricks to the living dead trade. Whether you’re fighting the zombies or are a zombie yourself, this collection is all that you need to survive on your own.Included in this book are excerpts and illustrations from such helpful handbooks as:The Code of the Zombie PirateThe Art of Zombie WarfareZ.E.O.The Zen of ZombieZombies vs. NazisThe Ultimate Book of Zombie Warfare and Survival is a one-stop shop for everything you’ve ever wanted to know about the world of zombies. Whether you’re the undead seeking to make it in the business industry, fine-tune your martial arts, master your swashbuckling, or move on up the corporate ladder, this compendium is just for you.With gory full-color illustrations and insightful knowledge from the man who knows zombies better than they know themselves, The Ultimate Book of Zombie Warfare and Survival will scare, teach, and prepare you for everything you’ve ever needed to know about zombies.Skyhorse Publishing, under our Night Shade and Talos imprints, is proud to publish a broad range of titles for readers interested in science fiction (space opera, time travel, hard SF, alien invasion, near-future dystopia), fantasy (grimdark, sword and sorcery, contemporary urban fantasy, steampunk, alternative history), and horror (zombies, vampires, and the occult and supernatural), and much more. While not every title we publish becomes a New York Times bestseller, a national bestseller, or a Hugo or Nebula award-winner, we are committed to publishing quality books from a diverse group of authors.
The Ultimate Cockney Geezer's Guide to Rhyming Slang
by Geoff TibballsWould you Adam and Eve it? Over a hundred years after it was first heard on the streets of Ye Olde London Towne, Cockney rhyming slang is still going strong, and this book contains the most comprehensive and entertaining guide yet.Presented in an easy-to-read A to Z format, it explains the meaning of hundreds of terms, from old favourites such as apples and pears (stairs) and plates of meat (feet) to the more obscure band of hope (soap) and cuts and scratches (matches) through to modern classics such as Anthea Turner (earner) and Ashley Cole (own goal), as well as providing fascinating background info and curious Cockney facts throughout. Also included are a series of language tests so that readers can brush up on their newfound knowledge on their way to becoming a true Cockney Geezer.All in all, The Ultimate Cockney Geezer's Guide to Rhyming Slang is well worth your bread and honey to have a butcher's.
Ultimate Dad Stuff
by Steve Caplin Simon RoseChildren expect the earth from their fathers. They have to be able to conjure up games from thin air, to answer every question under the sun, to skim stones, and tell bedtime stories. ULTIMATE DAD STUFF is the book every father needs to keep up with their kids. Bringing together two separates volumes, it is the one stop shop for games, useful knowledge, puzzles and activities. ULTIMATE DAD STUFF is packed with great things to do with the kids. Some new, some traditional: how to learn to ride a bike without tears; how to play the spoons; a rainy afternoon's supply of knock knock jokes; a selection of magic tricks and how to answer 'Dad, where do babies come from?' There is a range of ideas to suit all situations -- games, puzzles, practical jokes and spooky urban myths. A father's work is never done and ULTIMATE DAD STUFF supplies even more fun, with magic, puzzles, things to make and games to play. All guaranteed to stave off the cry of 'Dad, are we there yet?'
The Ultimate Discworld Companion
by Terry Pratchett Stephen BriggsThe absolute, comprehensive, from Tiffany Aching to Jack Zweiblumen guide to all things Discworld, fully illustrated by Paul Kidby.The Discworld, as everyone knows, is a flat world balanced on the back of four elephants which, in turn, stand on the shell of the giant star turtle, the Great A'Tuin, as it slowly swims through space.It is also the global publishing phenomenon with sales of over 70 million books worldwide (but who's counting?). There's an awful lot of Discworld to keep track of. But fear not! Help is at hand. For the very first time, everything (and we mean everything) you could possibly want to know has been crammed into one place.If you need a handy guide to locales from Ankh-Morpork to Zemphis . . .If you can't tell your Achmed the Mads from your Jack Zweiblumens . . .If your life depends on distinguishing between the Agatean Empire and the Zoons . . .Look no further. Updated and perfected by Stephen Briggs, the man behind The Ultimate Discworld Companion's predecessor Turtle Recall, this is your ultimate guide to Sir Terry Pratchett's beloved fantasy world.
The Ultimate Discworld Companion
by Terry Pratchett Stephen BriggsThe absolute, comprehensive, from Tiffany Aching to Jack Zweiblumen guide to all things Discworld, fully illustrated by Paul Kidby.The Discworld, as everyone knows, is a flat world balanced on the back of four elephants which, in turn, stand on the shell of the giant star turtle, the Great A'Tuin, as it slowly swims through space.It is also the global publishing phenomenon with sales of over 70 million books worldwide (but who's counting?). There's an awful lot of Discworld to keep track of. But fear not! Help is at hand. For the very first time, everything (and we mean everything) you could possibly want to know has been crammed into one place.If you need a handy guide to locales from Ankh-Morpork to Zemphis . . .If you can't tell your Achmed the Mads from your Jack Zweiblumens . . .If your life depends on distinguishing between the Agatean Empire and the Zoons . . .Look no further. Updated and perfected by Stephen Briggs, the man behind The Ultimate Discworld Companion's predecessor Turtle Recall, this is your ultimate guide to Sir Terry Pratchett's beloved fantasy world.
The Ultimate Game Guide To Your Life: Or, The Video Game As Existential Metaphor
by Christopher MonksFor anyone who has ever felt like life is like a video game comes this faux game guide for a fictional adventure video game titled ''Your Life.''Fans of videogames or anyone who has ever held a controller will love this romp through life's challenges from the formative Toddler Years all the way to the Retirement Home. Complete with navigation, instructions for which buttons to press on your gamepad, and secret codes for success, you'll find out all the tricks to win such challenges as ''Navigating the School Cafeteria on the First Day of High School'' and ''Temp Job Derby.'' Plus you'll learn the important skill of fending off giant robots. Gamepad not included.
The Ultimate George W. Bushisms: Bush at War (with the English Language)
by Jacob Weisberg"This business about graceful exit just simply has no realism to it at all." As the end of the Bush era approaches, the legacy is clear: George W. Bush is a wartime president. His enemy, battered but not defeated after repeated surges: the English language. The ultimate edition of George W. Bushisms captures this legacy -- from the Gulf Coast to Iraq and back -- with all-new pearls of wisdom and the twenty-five greatest hits of the entire presidency. "You know, when I campaigned here in 2000, I said, I want to be a war president. No president wants to be a war president, but I am one." "I think -- tide turning -- see, as I remember -- I was raised in the desert, but tides kind of -- it's easy to see a tide turn -- did I say those words?"
The Ultimate Gross Challenge: A Battle of Yucky Choices
by Jimmy NiroThe grossest, goofiest, gut-busting game book ever!Battle your friends and family in a wacky game too silly for real life and get ready to laugh out loud! In this epic gross championship, read aloud hundreds of the funniest and most disgusting questions and earn points deciding which hilariously nasty scenarios you would rather choose. It's the perfect game book for endless hours of fun for kids age 8 to 12 and kids at heart! Are YOU ready for The Ultimate Gross Challenge?Bringing lots of non-stop giggles, this gross humor book for kids is perfect for:Gifts for boys and girls: A laugh-out-loud gift for birthdays, holiday stocking stuffers, Easter baskets, and moreScreen-free time: Non-stop entertainment for family game nights, parties, road trips, and sleepoversReluctant young readers: Funny content engages the imaginations of reluctant and beginner readers, helping them gain confidence and build vocabulary and reading comprehensionCould you drink a glass of water from a dirty fish tank, or would you lick the liquid leaking from a garbage can?Could you sleep on a pillow made of eyeballs, or would you snuggle up in a blanket full of fish guts?Could you eat baby snakes as pasta, or would you eat dish sponges as sandwich bread
The Ultimate Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Five Novels in One Outrageous Volume (The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy #1 - 5)
by Douglas Adams<p>At last in paperback in one complete volume, here are the five classic novels from Douglas Adams’s beloved <i>Hitchiker</i> series. <p><i>The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy</i>. Seconds before the Earth is demolished for a galactic freeway, Arthur Dent is saved by Ford Prefect, a researcher for the revised Guide. Together they stick out their thumbs to the stars and begin a wild journey through time and space. <p><i>The Restaurant at the End of the Universe</i>. Facing annihilation at the hands of warmongers is a curious time to crave tea. It could only happen to the cosmically displaced Arthur Dent and his comrades as they hurtle across the galaxy in a desperate search for a place to eat. <p><i>Life, the Universe and Everything</i>. The unhappy inhabitants of planet Krikkit are sick of looking at the night sky– so they plan to destroy it. The universe, that is. Now only five individuals can avert Armageddon: mild-mannered Arthur Dent and his stalwart crew. <p><i>So Long, and Thanks for All the Fish</i>. Back on Earth, Arthur Dent is ready to believe that the past eight years were all just a figment of his stressed-out imagination. But a gift-wrapped fishbowl with a cryptic inscription conspires to thrust him back to reality. So to speak. <p><i>Mostly Harmless</i>. Just when Arthur Dent makes the terrible mistake of starting to enjoy life, all hell breaks loose. Can he save the Earth from total obliteration? Can he save the Guide from a hostile alien takeover? Can he save his daughter from herself?