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You're Making Me Six: A Graphic Novel (Catwad #6)
by Jim BentonIt's Sixth time's the charm!Catwad and Blurmp venture out of the living room and into the world in this hilarious graphic novel! Attending a comic convention, taking a swim deep inside a toilet bowl, gazing into the future with Blurmp’s crystal ball, shredding on guitar, and horseback riding are just a few adventures in this laugh-out-loud collection. It’s the zaniest Catwad yet!
You're Married to Her?
by Ira WoodAs the anti-Vietnam War movement drew to a close, a twenty-six-year-old unknown playwright began an affair with a glamorous older woman, a feminist activist and acclaimed poet/novelist at the height of her career. What she saw in a neurotic, sexually naïve, poorly educated but very sweet guy was apparent to no one, especially him. Using a wildly self-skewering but oddly sympathetic narrative voice that fulfills The New York Times' assessment of his "special gift for heartwarming comedy," Ira Wood re-imagines his early years with Marge Piercy in a series of chronologically linked essays, never failing to raise the question that few have failed to ask: You're married to Her?With the brazen candor of Toby Young's How to Lose Friends and Alienate People and the wicked lunacy of David Sedaris, Wood tells tales of his first true love, who he told his parents were dead; his disastrous affair with a promiscuous single mother, while he was involved with Piercy; his childhood dependence on speed; and running for public office on a lark-and winning-only to find himself responsible for the government of a small town. Thirty years later he's still married to Her, confident enough to share, and laugh at, what men do when their behavior slips to the level of their self-esteem.Ira Wood is the author of two novels and the co-author, with Marge Piercy, of two highly acclaimed books, a novel and a writing text. His talk show The Lowdown streams on WOMR-FM, a Pacifica network affiliate.
You're Mine, Captain! (Geronimo Stilton Spacemice)
by Geronimo StiltonIn this fun science fiction spin-off to the bestselling middle grade series, a mouse astronaut travels to an alien planet for a cosmic adventure.Meet Geronimo Stiltonix: He is a spacemouse—the Geronimo Stilton of a parallel universe! He is captain of the spaceship MouseStar 1. While flying through the cosmos he visits distant planets and meets crazy aliens. His adventures are out of this world!In You’re Mine, Captain! The MouseStar 1 is contacted by strange aliens whose ship has broken down! Geronimo Stiltonix is happy to help them out, and even accompanies them to their home planet Flurkon. But during his visit, the alien queen becomes enchanted by Geronimo—and wants to marry him! Will he be forced to stay on Flurkon forever?Praise for the Geronimo Stilton’s Spacemice series:“A wonderful science-fiction introduction for young readers.” —Kirkus ReviewsPraise for Geronimo Stilton’s books:“Lightning pace and full-color design will hook kids in a flash.” —PUBLISHERS WEEKLY
You're Missing It!
by Brady Smith Tiffani ThiessenA busy Hollywood couple spins a hilarious cautionary tale about what happens when you are glued to your phone.It's a lively day at the neighborhood park. Birds are singing, squirrels are frolicking, dogs are causing a commotion--and wide-eyed children are enthralled by it all. Too bad the parents are missing everything! It's going to take something really BIG to get them to disengage from their phones . . .This timely story, brought to life with beautiful bold art, is a great reminder to slow down and savor time together.
You're Mom: A Little Book for Mothers (And the People Who Love Them)
by Liz ClimoFrom international bestselling author Liz Climo comes You're Mom, a hilarious and relatable collection of original comics about motherhood Moms: they are there for us through the good, the bad, the scary, the sticky, and everything in between. They also read us a lot of picture books along the way, and now there’s a picture book just for them. Liz Climo brings her trademark wit and adorable drawings to You're Mom: a funny, honest, and sweet homage to motherhood. Detailing the ups and downs of mothering, along with the many paths to becoming a mom and the different types of motherhood, Climo pairs humorous observations with clever illustrations of baby animals and their mothers. With more than 100 beautiful drawings, You're Mom is a book for the new mom, the seasoned mom, anyone in a mom-like role, or anyone who has ever loved a mom. It’s a thank you to those taking on the challenging role of parenting - and it's also short and sweet, which means you can read it and then hopefully get some sleep!
You're Never too Old to Laugh: A laugh-out-loud collection of cartoons, quotes, jokes, and trivia on growing older
by Ed FischerBeing "old" isn't what it used to be. Elders today are active, fun, and ready for something new. Stay young at heart with the wit, wisdom, and inspiration you'll find in this book by Ed Fischer. It's time to be the new you. Live it up. Laugh often. Love life like never before.
You're Not Doing It Right
by Michael Ian BlackFollowing his first book of hilarious essays in My Custom Van, Michael Ian Black expands his commentary to the subject that has made him one of the most-followed celebrities on Twitter: his irreverent take on the joys of suburban family life. In the tradition of Christian Lander's hipster/yuppie-friendly bestselling catalog of observations in Stuff White People Like, Michael Ian Black delivers his unique brand of quirky, deadpan humor in this new collection of comedic essays. Now that Black has become the guy he swore he'd never be--a Yuppie A-Hole--he has a lot to say about his family life in suburbia, and he shares his incisive yet absurd observations with readers in Clappy as a Ham. Chronicling his adventures from cruising the neighborhood for his inevitable future "divorce house" (despite being happily married) to listening to Lite FM and realizing he loves it, Black delivers his straightfaced musings with the same sardonic humor that has earned him a rabid cult following. Want to know the pros and cons of Kashi GoLean Crunch or why kindergarten recitals are so boring? Looking for tips for lying to your kids about Santa? Clever, dry, and laugh-out-loud funny, Clappy as a Ham will "blow your mind all over your face" just like My Custom Van.
You're Not Old, You're Just Not That Young: The Funny Thing About Getting Older
by Harvey LittleYou might not be a spring chicken any more, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t keep on strutting your stuff! This collection of witty quotations, light-hearted yarns and cheerful jokes will help you stay young at heart, and see the funny side of getting older with a smile on your face.
You're Not Special: A (Sort-of) Memoir (G - Reference, Information And Interdisciplinary Subjects Ser.)
by Meghan RienksIn her first-ever (sort of) memoir, the beloved actor and YouTube sensation gets personal about everything from mental health to drunken debaucheries. As an only child raised in a town of less than 8,000 people and without a Starbucks in sight, Meghan Rienks has always been pretty good at entertaining herself. Then one day—cue the dramatic voiceover—her life changed forever. On June 12th, 2010, Meghan was diagnosed with mononucleosis. Mono is basically just a really bad case of the flu, right? Wrong. To a party crazed sixteen-year-old, mono is social suicide. More than anything, it&’s just plain boring. So, Meghan opened up her 2009 MacBook, used the webcam for something other than a bad Andy Warhol–style photobooth session, and recorded her first YouTube video. Since then, Meghan has shared the ups and downs of her life with the internet, documenting her teenage years for the whole world to see. Now that she&’s (mostly) through her awkward stage, Meghan&’s here to tell you that it gets better. You&’re not alone in the thoughts you think. Sometimes a bad hair day feels worse than a punch in the gut and asking a boy out seems about as difficult as achieving that perfect dewy glow. But despite what you&’ve been told, your problems are not unique, your struggles have taken form in everybody else&’s life too, and somebody else has felt the way you feel right at this very moment. You&’re not special. But you&’re also not alone on the bumpy road to adulthood.
You're Not That Great: (but neither is anyone else)
by Elan GaleI am addicted to positivity. I am addicted to positivity. I am addicted to positivity.I care more about feeling great than being great.I am NOT THAT GREAT.The self-help industry tells you that if you're positive, if you put your best foot forward and if you just believe in yourself that you will find happiness. Let's be real, you can read all the inspirational quotes you want. You can spend your days giving yourself affirmations in your heart-shaped mirror and trying to learn to love yourself. You can say your mantra over and over again while sitting cross-legged on a yoga mat in a Whole Foods parking lot. But the truth is, you're not a badass and you still don't have the life you want. That's where You're Not That Great (but neither is anyone else) comes in. This book teaches you how to harness all the negativity in the world and use it to improve your life, taking everyday feelings like self-loathing, regret and shame and making them work for you. Positive thinking is for assholes. Negative thinking is for winners.
You're Old, I'm Old . . . Get Used to It!
by Virginia IronsideNo matter what they say, sixty will never be the new forty. But sixty-five-year-old author Virginia Ironside is determined to convince people that getting old is really not so bad - even for a Baby Boomer who interviewed the Rolling Stones and Jimi Hendrix early in her career. Here, Virginia Ironside explores the many unsung benefits of aging. There are ailments, but there are also fabulous meds. There are grandchildren - your reward for not killing your own children. And then there's "wisdom," that random accumulated knowledge you can label as such just because you're old. You're Old, I'm Old . . . Get Used to It! celebrates scattered memory, frequent naps, and mercifully lowered expectations.
You're Only Old Once!: A Book for Obsolete Children (Classic Seuss)
by Dr. SeussJoin in on the fun (and funny) journey of getting older with this hilarious Dr. Seuss picture book—it&’s just what the doctor ordered for new retirees, old souls, and kids at heart--and makes a perfect gift to celebrate birthdays and other milestones!" The Doctor is in...Dr. Seuss that is! Readers will laugh along with the parade of medical madness as an elderly patient is poked, prodded and ogled during his stay at the &“Golden Years Clinic on Century Square for Spleen Readjustment and Muffler Repair.&” Once again, Dr. Seuss proves that his sharp wit and colorful imagination are a treat for readers of all ages. A perfect gift for retirement, birthdays, graduations, holidays, and anyone needing a little pick-me-up after a doctor&’s visit!
You're Only Old Once!
by Dr SeussYou're Only Old Once! Is this a children's book? Well... not immediately. You buy a copy for your child now and you give it to him on his 70th birthday. If laughter is the best medicine, then You're Only Old Once! is a delightful new defense against aging. Anyone who has ever submitted to a battery of medical tests will empathize with Dr. Seuss's Everyman in this wry book. In it we follow our hapless hero through his checkup with the experts at the Golden Years Clinic. From the initial Eyesight and Solvency Test HAVE YOU ANY IDEA HOW MUCH MONEY THESE TESTS ARE COSTING YOU? --through all the stops along Stethoscope Row to finally being "properly pilled" and "properly billed," Dr. Seuss lightens the aches and pains of growing old with his inimitable wit and wisdom. While you're waiting for your child to turn 70, why not test-run You're Only Old Once! on an obsolete child now?
You're Only Old Once! Read & Listen Edition: A Book for Obsolete Children (Classic Seuss)
by Dr. SeussWith his unmistakable rhymes and signature illustration style, Dr. Seuss creates a classic picture-book ode to aging in You're Only Old Once! On a visit to "the Golden Years Clinic on Century Square for Spleen Readjustment and Muffler Repair," readers will laugh with familiar horror at the poking and prodding and testing and ogling that go hand in hand with the dreaded appellation of "senior citizen." Though Dr. Seuss is known for his peerless work in books for children, this comical look at what it's like to get older is ideal for Seuss fans of advanced years. In his own words, this is "a book for obsolete children." A perfect gift for retirement, birthdays, and holidays!This Read & Listen edition contains audio narration.
You're Sending Me Where?: Dispatches from Summer Camp
by Eric DregniWelcome! Benvenuti! It’s summertime in northern Minnesota and a bus full of kids is about to arrive at the Italian Concordia Language Village, better known as camp. Inexplicably the chief lifeguard has chosen this moment to conduct a “missing villager drill,” prompting staff to strip to their underwear in a simulated rush to search the lake. It’s an inopportune time for a surprise visit from the Health Inspector, but there he is—just as an Italian counselor calls through the walkie-talkie, “My God, there’s blood everywhere!” He’s finally clobbered the chipmunk that’s been stealing his candy. When at age six he had to be hauled kicking and screaming on the bus bound for camp, Eric Dregni could not have imagined this moment. But all the days and weeks of summer camp since then have shown him the abundant pleasures of this uniquely American experience—and given him plenty of stories to tell. In You’re Sending Me Where? Dregni takes us back to those boyhood days of running head-on into nature with his fellow campers and learning a few valuable lessons, such as don’t let the van driver leave you and your canoe until you’re sure there’s actually water in the “flowage.” From discouraging summer love to soothing homesick campers to—Oh no! Bats!—taking everyone to town for their rabies shots, to the difficulty of saying goodbye, Eric Dregni’s wise, funny book reassures us that there’s still a place in the woods where, unplugged from devices and screens, children of all ages can connect with the natural world—and with each other.
You're So Welcome: Three Inviting Novels by Elinor Lipman
by Elinor LipmanFor longtime fans and new readers alike, You're So Welcome: Three Novels by Elinor Lipman collects three beloved works (My Latest Grievance, The Family Man, The View from Penthouse B) by the “enchanting, infinitely witty yet serious, exceptionally intelligent, wholly original, and Austen-like stylist”* Elinor Lipman. (*Fay Weldon, The Washington Post)MY LATEST GRIEVANCEMy Latest Grievance stars the beguiling teenager Frederica Hatch, the “Eloise of Dewing College.” Born and raised in the dormitory of this small women's college and chafing under the care of “the most annoyingly evenhanded parental team in the history of civilization,” Frederica is starting to feel that her life is stiflingly snug. That all changes with the arrival on campus of a new dorm mother, the glamorous Laura Lee French, the frenetic center of her own universe.THE FAMILY MAN A hysterical phone call from Henry Archer’s ex-wife and a familiar face in a photograph upend his well-ordered life and bring him back into contact with the child he adored, a short-term stepdaughter from a misbegotten marriage long ago. Henry is a lawyer, an old-fashioned man, gay, successful, lonely. Thalia is now twenty-nine, an actress-hopeful, estranged from her newly widowed eccentric mother—Denise, Henry’s ex. Hoping it will lead to better things for her career, Thalia agrees to pose as the girlfriend of a horror-movie luminary who is down on his romantic luck. When Thalia and her complicated social life move into the basement of Henry’s Upper West Side townhouse, she finds a champion in her long-lost father, and he finds new life—and maybe even new love—in the commotion.THE VIEW FROM PENTHOUSE B Unexpectedly widowed Gwen-Laura Schmidt is still mourning her husband, Edwin, when her older sister Margot invites her to join forces as roommates in Margot’s luxurious Greenwich Village apartment. For Margot, divorced amid scandal (hint: her husband was a fertility doctor) and then made Ponzi-poor, it’s a chance to shake Gwen out of her grief and help make ends meet. To further this effort, she enlists a third boarder, the handsome, cupcake-baking Anthony. As the three swap moneymaking schemes and timid Gwen ventures back out into the dating world, the arrival of Margot’s paroled ex in the efficiency apartment downstairs creates not just complications but the chance for all sorts of unexpected forgiveness. A sister story about love, loneliness, and new life in middle age from one of our finest comic writers.
You're Still A Doctor, Doctor! (The Dr Clifford Chronicles)
by Dr Robert CliffordThe greatest joys of retiring, writes Dr Bob, are not having to get up early in the morning, not having to work at weekends and, above all, not being called out of bed at night. He should have added that it gives him more time to dip into his rich fund of lighthearted stories of wit, wisdom and the world at large.You're Still a Doctor, Doctor! gives us amusing insights into his medical career, and the writing and broadcasting career, and the writing and broadcasting career that took him under the spotlights and into some very embarrassing situations indeed . . .He also paints colourful pictures of patients and colleagues, records time spent messing about on boats, and the hilarious adventures of holidays abroad where he met, amongst countless others a man from Wolverhampton who married an eskimo . . .
You're That Bitch: & Other Cute Lessons About Being Unapologetically Yourself
by Bretman Rock“This book is hilarious and that bitch made me laugh out loud.”—Chelsea HandlerA chaotically joyous collection of essays from one of the original influencers and the internet's sweetheart, Bretman "The Baddest" Rock.Hilarious and earnest, this collection of essays, drawings, recipes, how-tos and never-before-seen photos goes far beyond what we know of Bretman Rock from social media. Who is Bretman Rock Sacayanan behind the screen and how did he become the original superstar influencer and today’s beloved best friend of the internet? You're That Bitch welcomes you into Bretman Rock's world—from how his childhood in the Philippines, his family, Filipino culture, and being a first-generation immigrant helped shape him into who he is today. Peek into how Bretman became a social media sensation at the precocious age of 14, balancing living a glamorous jet-setting lifestyle on weekends while still serving lunch at his school’s cafeteria, running as a varsity track-star, and making honor roll during the week. With his signature honesty, this is an unfiltered and unprecedented look at what it means to be one of the first digital celebrities and that bitch---from dealing with cancel culture, drama and heartbreak, to what it means to love yourself and your community. From the funniest and undeniably cutest person on the internet, this is a book for the weirdos and for the bad bitches . . . this book is for you!
You're the Best: A Celebration of Friendship
by Lian Dolan Monica Dolan Julie Dolan Liz Dolan Sheila DolanFrom the introduction:I owe you for that night at that dive bar on our road trip. I should not line dance under the influence, and I think we both know that now. I owe you for letting me borrow that really expensive evening clutch with the feathers. <P><P>I had no idea puppies liked feathers.I owe you for that really poor financial advice I gave to you. It was loud on the subway, but I thought I heard that guy in the suit say, "Buy Enron." I owe you for Brad. Let's not talk about him ever again. You're smart. You're funny. You text just the right amount. You're the one person who tells my about the thing in my teeth without sounding just a little bit superior. You're the best. You're the Best is a thank-you note to female friends, the women we call when the best things in our lives happen--or the worst. Written by two generations of Satellite Sisters, this beautifully packaged hardcover book explores how we rely on our friends to get us up, get us going, get us through, and, most importantly, get us laughing. It makes a superb gift for friends, sisters, mothers, daughters, and granddaughters.The Satellite Sisters--Julie, Liz, Sheila, Monica, and Lian Dolan--are five sisters who believe that a sense of connection is what gives meaning to our lives. The Dolan sisters created Satellite Sisters first as a nationwide radio show and website. Now, the Satellite Sisters connect with a blog, a podcast, books, personal appearances, and social media; joining them regularly are their cadre of twenty-something nieces. After winning twelve Gracie Allen Awards for excellence in women's media, they still have plenty more to say.
You're the Duke That I Want (The Thunderbolt Club)
by Lenora BellUSA Today bestseller Lenora Bell returns with a Grease-inspired rom-com about an innocent lady who clashes with a sexy rake, the first book in a brand-new series sure to delight fans of Sarah MacLean, Tessa Dare, and Julia Quinn.Raised by an overprotective mother, bookish romantic Sandrine Oliver craves adventure, but nothing exciting ever happens in her sleepy seaside village. Until a handsome, mysterious stranger arrives and sweeps her off her feet…only to leave suddenly with no explanation. Lord Dane Walker, brother to the Duke of Rydell, is infamous for racing fast carriages and breaking hearts. But when his brother is mortally injured, Dane inherits the responsibilities of the dukedom—duties that come with a dangerous secret which threatens everyone close to him. In London, Sandrine is astonished to learn that the charming, honorable man she met at the beach is really a disreputable rake. And the infuriating nobleman acts as though he barely knows her.Who needs a wild rake? Certainly not Sandrine! With a little help from her friends, she transforms into a glamorous belle. She’s out to make Dane pay…but can she stop her traitorous heart from longing to surrender only to him?
You're the One
by Gene TaylorIntimidated by the clubs and cabarets of 1970s Chicago, shy English teacher Graham Thomas needs a miracle just to be able to talk to a man. When help arrives from a Robert Redford look-alike wizard, Graham brushes him off--he's obviously certifiable. Or so Graham thinks until he tries out a popular song title as a come-on line and everything changes. Given the power to make others fall in love with him, Graham begins to enjoy the nightlife. But when he misuses his gift, he finds himself with accidental and unwanted suitors, including the senior dean at his school, a ticket-mad cop, and a rich young banker. Then Graham meets Mark Matthews and finally faces the moral issue of whether it's fair to use magic to make someone fall in love. It would be so easy....
You're the One that I don't want
by Alexandra PotterHow do you know he's The One? Are you getting butterflies just thinking about him? Have you dreamt of marrying him? Do you just know? When Lucy meets Nate in Venice, she knows instantly he's The One. And, caught up in the whirlwind of first love, they kiss under the Bridge of Sighs at sunset. Which -- according to legend -- will tie them together forever. But ten years later, they've completely lost contact. That is, until Lucy moves to New York and the legend brings them back together. Again. And again. And again. But what if Nate isn't The One? How is she going to get rid of him? Because forever could be a very long time...A funny, magical romantic comedy about how finding The One doesn't always have to mean happily ever after.
You're the One That I Want
by Angela BritnellSeven countries. Ten days. Two strangers. And one perfectly unexpected love story. When Cornwall schoolteacher Sarah Agnoli wins an all-expense paid coach tour, it isn’t just an opportunity to see Europe. It’s a chance for the divorcée to show her cheating ex-husband that she’s fine without him. Convincing an American stranger to play the role of “boyfriend” and posting their selfies won’t hurt. How can Tennessee businessman Matt Anderson say no to the charade? Sarah’s sweet, charming, and let’s face it—feeling a little burned. Besides, he can use the company. But somewhere between the fairytale castles of Germany and Via Cappello in Verona, something clicks. Yesterday it was a game of let’s pretend. Today, Max and Sarah want to play for keeps. Tomorrow? Impossible. They’ll both be heading their separate ways. Fate brought them together. Now it’s up to fate to make sure they’ll never be apart.
Yours Cheerfully: A Novel (The Emmy Lake Chronicles #2)
by AJ PearceFrom the author of the &“jaunty, heartbreaking winner&” (People) and international bestseller Dear Mrs. Bird, a new charming and uplifting novel set in London during World War II about a plucky aspiring journalist.London, November 1941. Following the departure of the formidable Henrietta Bird from Woman&’s Friend magazine, things are looking up for Emmeline Lake as she takes on the challenge of becoming a young wartime advice columnist. Her relationship with boyfriend Charles (now stationed back in the UK) is blossoming, while Emmy&’s best friend Bunty, still reeling from the very worst of the Blitz, is bravely looking to the future. Together, the friends are determined to Make a Go of It. When the Ministry of Information calls on Britain&’s women&’s magazines to help recruit desperately needed female workers to the war effort, Emmy is thrilled to be asked to step up and help. But when she and Bunty meet a young woman who shows them the very real challenges that women war workers face, Emmy must tackle a life-changing dilemma between doing her duty and standing by her friends. Every bit as funny, heartwarming, and touching as Dear Mrs. Bird, Yours Cheerfully is a celebration of friendship—a testament to the strength of women and the importance of lifting each other up, even in the most challenging times.
Yours Cruelly, Elvira: Memoirs of the Mistress of the Dark
by Cassandra PetersonThe woman behind the icon known as Elvira, Mistress of the Dark, the undisputed Queen of Halloween, reveals her full story, filled with intimate bombshells, told by the bombshell herself. On Good Friday in 1953, at only 18 months old, 25 miles from the nearest hospital in Manhattan, Kansas, Cassandra Peterson reached for a pot on the stove and doused herself in boiling water. Third-degree burns covered 35% of her body, and the prognosis wasn't good. But she survived. Burned and scarred, the impact stayed with her and became an obstacle she was determined to overcome. Feeling like a misfit led to her love of horror. While her sisters played with Barbie dolls, Cassandra built model kits of Frankenstein and Dracula, and idolized Vincent Price. <P><P>Due to a complicated relationship with her mother, Cassandra left home at 14, and by age 17 she was performing at the famed Dunes Hotel in Las Vegas. Run-ins with the likes of Frank Sinatra, Sammy Davis Jr., and Tom Jones helped her grow up fast. Then a chance encounter with her idol Elvis Presley, changed the course of her life forever, and led her to Europe where she worked in film and traveled Italy as lead singer of an Italian pop band. She eventually made her way to Los Angeles, where she joined the famed comedy improv group, The Groundlings, and worked alongside Phil Hartman and Paul "Pee-wee" Reubens, honing her comedic skills. <P><P>Nearing age 30, a struggling actress considered past her prime, she auditioned at local LA channel KHJ as hostess for the late night vintage horror movies. Cassandra improvised, made the role her own, and got the job on the spot. Yours Cruelly, Elvira is an unforgettably wild memoir. Cassandra doesn't shy away from revealing exactly who she is and how she overcame seemingly insurmountable odds. Always original and sometimes outrageous, her story is loaded with twists, travails, revelry, and downright shocking experiences. It is the candid, often funny, and sometimes heart-breaking tale of a Midwest farm girl's long strange trip to become the world's sexiest, sassiest Halloween icon. <P><P><b>A New York Times Best Seller</b>