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What's Up, Chuck?
by Leo LandryA hilarious follow-up to Grin and Bear It, this early reader offers lessons on jealousy, self-confidence and the art of making new friends.Chuck Wood is upset. Jealous, too. Also insecure. As the winner of the Best of the Forest art contest three years in a row, he finds it very difficult to deal with the prospect that newcomer Scooter Possum&’s abstract paintings might beat his wood sculptures. But with the help of his forest friends, Chuck deals with his hurt feelings and realizes that his love for creating art is greater than his need to win. When you follow your heart, everyone&’s a winner.
What's Up, Duck?: A Book of Opposites (Duck & Goose)
by Tad HillsLittle siblings of Duck and Goose fans rejoice! The stars of the bestselling Duck & Goose and Duck, Duck, Goose return in this board book for preschoolers, this time, to introduce basic opposites. Goose carries an ohso-heavy log, while duck easily balances a light-as-a-feather feather. Thistle is one fast bird, but Goose is slooo-w. And when Duck is sound asleep, Goose is wide awake. With a simple text and colorful illustrations-plus the inimitable characters, of course-here's a wonderful, and humorous, introduction to an important concept.From the Board edition.
What's What and What to Do About It
by Waldo MellonImaginary advice columnist Waldo Mellon offers humor and wisdom as a balm for the anxieties of life.Dear Abby, Dear Ann Landers... make room for Dear Waldo, the imaginary advice columnist of the woes and foibles of human existence from screenwriter Steve Adams. "Dear Waldo, "My moron brother Lance is obsessed with the idea that there's millions and millions of other planets with life on them. How do I break the news to him it isn't so? "Sincerely, "Bruno" "Dear Bruno, "Before I answer your question, I'd like to point out that there is no such thing as a moron or an idiot or an imbecile. There are only living things that know different things than you know. "To answer your question, let's take a look at this thing called Life that your brother is talking about. Of course there's a much earlier model of Living Things: Plants. The basic different between Animals and Plants is that Animals are cordless, whereas Plants have to be plugged in..." "Dear Waldo, "I have done a horrible thing. It's such a horrible thing that I can't tell anybody. I'm hoping you can help me. "Anonymous" "Dear Anonymous, "Unless you're born and then die real quick, you will live to do what you think are horrible things. May I take me, for instance? "Here I am taking my brother's bunny out of the cage and I'm throwing him up and I'm letting him land on the floor. Over and over. It couldn't move its hind legs after that. A few days later my father poured some chloroform on to a rag and put the rag and the bunny into a shoe box and held it tight until everything stopped moving... "In my opinion we all have a Treasure Box in our heads. It's where we store our essence: The greatest of our great pleasures, our proud moments, and great sorrows. So why not place into that same Treasure Box the most horrible of our horrors? "Anonymous, answer honestly: which has done a better job of sharpening your focus--the good things you've done, or the bad things? "And so, Anonymous, that horrible thing you did that broke no laws and hurt no one but yourself? Toss it in your Treasure Box and move on. "Your fan, "Waldo Mellon"
What's The Worst That Could Happen (Dortmunder #9)
by Donald E. WestlakeIt started with a ring. A cheap ring. The yellow metal said brass, not gold, and the sparkly bits were certainly not diamonds. But the ring belonged to May's horseplaying uncle, who swore it brought good luck. Dortmunder, who wouldn't kick a little good luck out of bed, puts it to the test when he goes to burglarize Long Island billionaire Max Fairbanks. As luck would have it, Dortmunder is greeted by Fairbanks himself - and a loaded gun - as soon as he strolls through the door. When the cops arrive, the mogul adds insult to injury by claiming that Dortmunder's lucky ring is actually his. Big mistake, big guy. As soon as Dortmunder can give the cops the slip, the world's most single-minded burglar goes after the fat cat with a vengeance and a team of crooks that only he can assemble. And from the get go everything will go Dortmunder's way - everything, that is, except the ring.
What's Wrong with My Hair?
by Satoshi KitamuraLionel is going to a party today, so he must do something about his bad hair. He finds a barber who has lots of crazy suggestions for hairstyles, from dandelion hair to octopus hair! Will Lionel find a style that suits him, and what will be the surprise ending?A head-sized hole in each page allows children to try out Lionel's hairstyles for themselves, and the back cover has instructions for how to create your own hairstyle.
What's Your Number?: A Novel
by Karyn BosnakHow many men does it take to find true love?When Delilah Darling reads a survey revealing that most people have 10.5 sexual partners in their lifetime, she begins to feel like a tramp. She’s slept with nineteen men so far—almost twice the national average. During a self-help moment, she vows to cap her “number” at twenty, swearing she’ll save her last spot for the right guy. But after losing her job and having a wild night on the town, she falls into bed with Mr. Wrong. Unwilling to up her number, but also unable to imagine a life of celibacy, Delilah does the only thing a girl in her situation can do: she tracks down every man she’s ever slept with in a last-ditch effort to make it work with one of them.A hilarious romp through Delilah’s past loves, What’s Your Number? shines a spotlight on every woman’s dirty little secret and proves that, when it comes to matters of the heart, sometimes numbers tell only a fraction of the story.
The Wheel is Spinning but the Hamster is Dead: A Journey Around the World in Idioms, Proverbs and General Nonsense
by Adam SharpKnow your tater trap from your sniffle herring in Sharp's journey around the world in idioms, proverbs and general nonsense - the perfect gift for book lovers and language obsessives!'Brilliant, hilarious fun from a master wordsmith - you will LOVE this book' Kit de Waal'Extremely entertaining and very useful for new insults' Russell Kane'Utter genius' Marian Keyes'Brilliant' Brian BilstonJoin wordsmith Adam Sharp as he journeys around the world in idioms, proverbs and general nonsense. Learn unusual insults from France (You are a potato with the face of a guinea pig), how to hurry someone up in the US (You're going as slow as molasses in January) and what they call a shark in Vietnam (fat fish).Full of fascinating, ridiculous and hilarious translations from around the world, Adam has rounded up the very best of what every corner of the globe has to offer.Let's get this show on the road! Or:Let's saddle the chickens! (German)On with the butter! (Icelandic)Forward with the goat! (Dutch)
The Wheel is Spinning but the Hamster is Dead: A Journey Around the World in Idioms, Proverbs and General Nonsense
by Adam SharpKnow your tater trap from your sniffle herring in Sharp's journey around the world in idioms, proverbs and general nonsense - the perfect gift for book lovers and language obsessives!'Brilliant, hilarious fun from a master wordsmith - you will LOVE this book' Kit de Waal'Extremely entertaining and very useful for new insults' Russell Kane'Utter genius' Marian Keyes'Brilliant' Brian BilstonJoin wordsmith Adam Sharp as he journeys around the world in idioms, proverbs and general nonsense. Learn unusual insults from France (You are a potato with the face of a guinea pig), how to hurry someone up in the US (You're going as slow as molasses in January) and what they call a shark in Vietnam (fat fish).Full of fascinating, ridiculous and hilarious translations from around the world, Adam has rounded up the very best of what every corner of the globe has to offer.Let's get this show on the road! Or:Let's saddle the chickens! (German)On with the butter! (Icelandic)Forward with the goat! (Dutch)
Wheels, No Wheels
by Shannon McNeillAdorable barnyard animals go for a joyride in this hilarious tale, perfect for very young readers and fans of Little Blue Truck. A llama has no wheels. A turtle has no wheels. A cat has no wheels. Not to worry! A skateboard has wheels, a tractor has wheels and a bike has wheels. Some wily farm animals decide to go for a ride, leaving the farmer without her wheels. After the animals go and go and go and go, chaos ensues . . . but luckily there are some truck driving chicks to save the day.
Wheelworld: To The Stars Book 2 (To The Stars)
by Harry HarrisonWheelworld: An unforgiving planet where the sun is about to rise and will not set for another four years; where an ancient peasant hierarchy still rules a society equipped with the highest technology; where the people are as dependent on visiting ships as they are on the very air that they breathe; home for some, but for Jan Kulozik it is an eternal prison.And when ships don't come, Jan finds himself at the centre of an epic struggle for power, and survival...
When a Man Marries
by Mary Roberts RinehartA young artist, recently divorced by his wife, finds that his aunt is soon to visit. The aunt, who contributes to the family income and who has never seen the wife, knows nothing of the domestic upheaval. How the young man meets the situation is humorously and most entertainingly told.
When a Wolf Is Hungry
by Christine Naumann-VilleminALA Youth Media Awards: 2018 Batchelder Honor Award WinnerA darkly humorous tale with a twist ending Edmond Bigsnout, lone wolf that he is, loves his solitary cabin in the woods. But lately he's been craving urban rabbit for dinner, so he travels into the city to catch one. Unfortunately, the rabbit has a lot of neighbors—who mistake Edmond for a kind and helpful resident! Perhaps Edmond can become a good neighbor, despite his bad intentions. Readers of all ages will devour this story about a wolf who decides that if you can't eat them, join them.Kirkus Best Picture Books of 2017 Cooperative Children's Book Center&’s "CCBC Choices 2018&”
When Adam Came to Town
by Kate KellyTemptation moves in next door Sylvie Carson has no idea what she's going to do with the rest of her life! Artistically blocked, she hopes a prolonged stay in the seaside village she grew up in will help her get over this hump. But when Adam Hunter moves in next door, things only get more complicated, not less. The artist in Sylvie is immediately intrigued by her new neighbor-the haunting lines of his face, the natural athleticism of his body. Maybe Adam is the muse she's been looking for...but his shadowed eyes suggest he's just one more person keeping secrets from her. Though Sylvie can't deny that Adam inspires passion in her, the last thing she needs is a romance...right?
When Agnes Caws
by Candace FlemingWhen eight-year old Agnes Peregrine, an accomplished birdcaller, travels with her mother to the Himalayas in search of the elusive pink-headed duck, she encounters a dastardly foe.
When an Alien Meets a Swamp Monster
by Cornelius Van WrightCould two little boys who scare each other silly ever become friends?When Alik and Boi accidentally bump into each other at the pond, they aren’t exactly thrilled. In fact, they’re terrified! Boi thinks Alik is a swamp monster, and Alik thinks Boi is a space alien. Both run home in a panic to share their news, but their families don’t believe them. If only Alik and Boi can drum up the courage to venture back outside, they just might cross paths again and realize how much they have in common.With an encouraging message about second chances and looking past appearances, this delightfully absurd story about two very different-looking adventurers is full of laugh-out-loud, action-packed fun. It’s perfect for fans of funny books like Shark vs. Train and Children Make Terrible Pets.
When Apples Grew Noses and White Horses Flew: Tales of Ti-Jean
by Jan AndrewsA USBBY Outstanding International Books Honor Book and a nominee for the 2012 Silver Birch Express Award in the Ontario Library Association's Forest of Reading Program and the Canadian Library Association Book of the Year for Children Award In these three imaginative stories, Jan Andrews introduces us to Quebec's traditional folktale hero, Ti-Jean. He's an endearing character who is both wise and foolish, and though he does find himself in hard situations (often of his own making), in the end, he somehow manages to do what needs to be done. In "Ti-Jean and the Princess of Tomboso" he outwits a greedy princess; in "Ti-Jean the Marble Player" he gets the best of a pint-sized scoundrel; and in "How Ti-Jean Became a Fiddler" he turns the tables on a too-clever-for-her-own-good seigneur's daughter, and finds true love in the process.
When Baby Was Born (That's My Baby!)
by Jodi O'DonnellSHE KNEW HER BABY WAS PERFECT. SHE KNEW SHE TRUSTED CADE WITH HER LIFE. SHE THOUGHT HER NAME WAS SARA.Everything else was a mystery. And most confusing of all were the emotions that Cade's glance, his words...his touch stirred within her. Because based on a crumpled note, Cade believed she was married-to his estranged brother. Sara didn't want to believe it, but without her memory, she couldn't prove him wrong. Snowbound with Cade and her newborn son, Sara needed to fight past her fears to the truth. Because her growing feelings for Cade were anything be sisterly...
When Bad Things Happen to Rich People (Switchgrass Books)
by Ian MorrisWhen Bad Things Happen to Rich People is a novel of social satire, a black comedy set in Chicago in the summer of 1995. The novel's protagonist, Nix Walters, is an adjunct instructor of English at a communications college in the loop with few prospects for advancement. He had become a literary punch line when his novel, touted as the next big literary phenomenon, was universally panned by critics. He and his pregnant wife, Flora, are struggling financially; however, their fortunes change when Nix is asked to ghostwrite the memoirs of publishing magnate Zira Fontaine. While grateful for a lavish author fee, Nix quickly finds his marriage, his career, and his sense of identity threatened as he struggles with a difficult subject, navigates office intrigue of Fontaine's corporation, and faces impending fatherhood. These tensions come to a turbulent climax when a brutal heat wave hits the city. Written in the spirit of great naturalist novelists of the previous century, such as Dreiser, Norris, and Crane, with a black comic twist, Morris's first novel is a study in aspiration and self-deception in the face of unforeseen adversity. Set among the broad lawns of Lake Forest where the domestic staff skim leaves from the pool and the sweltering streets of Chicago's pre-gentrified Wicker Park neighborhood, where children plunge into the raging stream of open fire hydrants, When Bad Things Happen to Rich People is a broad panorama of our current social reality.
When Bad Things Happen to Stupid People: A Close To Home Collection (Close to Home #16)
by John McPhersonSome call it weird. Others, eclectic, creative, hilarious, laugh-out-loud funny, and good old-fashioned snort-milk-out-your-nose humor. Whatever adjective you apply to Close to Home, it has become one of the most popular comic panels in the funny pages today. Close to Home has devout fans that range from elementary students to octogenarians. As one fan put it, "I feel like you have been looking in my window and are drawing my life!" Though by no means a Peeping Tom, John McPherson does have the unique skill of being able to take those idiosyncrasies of daily life that drive us all nuts and infuse them with razor-sharp wit.In When Bad Things Happen to Stupid People John features angry letters from readers, cartoons that were killed by the editor, a glimpse inside his creative process, and never-before-seen photos of his erasers, quill pens, and his lucky drawing slippers. Who could resist it?
When Beauty Tamed The Beast: Number 2 in series (Happy Ever After #2)
by Eloisa James'Nothing gets me to a bookstore faster than Eloisa James' - Julia QuinnMiss Linnet Berry Thrynne is a Beauty . . . Naturally, she's betrothed to a Beast.If only her gown hadn't been so fully cut, or she hadn't been caught kissing that prince . . . But now the ton believes Linnet to be with royal child - and therefore unmarriageable - so she might as well make her desperate father happy by consenting to wed a beast.A brilliant surgeon with a reputation for losing his temper - and a wound believed to have left him . . . incapable - Piers, Earl of Montague, should welcome a bride-to-be carrying a ready-made, blue-blooded heir. But Piers isn't fooled by the lady's subterfuge, and though Linnet's devilishly smart and charming with a loveliness that outshines the sun, there will be no wedding of beauty to beast.Still, Linnet finds the gorgeous brute intriguing, with a spark of gentility behind his growl that's worth fanning. And it's obvious to the naked eye that 'incapable' does not mean 'uninterested'...'Eloisa James is extraordinary' - Lisa Kleypas'Romance writing does not get much better than this' - People
When Body Language Goes Bad: A Dilbert Book (Dilbert Ser. #21)
by Scott Adams"Dilbert is easily one of the most clever and consistently funny comics in current circulation. Like all great comic strips, it provides a much-needed daily dose of comedy and, most importantly, keeps its finger firmly planted on the pulse of truth while doing so." Some might think that the corporate scandals of 2002 could make it difficult to find anything funny about today's business world. But When Body Language Goes Bad proves it will take more than that to slow down the inventive wit of Scott Adams, who clearly is never at a loss for finding hysterical things to mock in corporate life.This marks the 21st collection of Adams' wildly popular comic strip, Dilbert, which is featured in more than 2,000 newspapers worldwide. This book updates loyal readers on the so-called careers of Dilbert, Alice, Wally, Asok the intern, and other regulars as they wallow through pointless projects, mismanaged company takeovers, futile team-building exercises, and other inane company initiatives like the "name the rest room" contest.In addition to the strips' familiar characters, this collection showcases Adams' masterful ability to create hilarious "guest stars." There's the network design engineer known as Psycho Hillbilly, who was going for the gentle biker look until he decided it was overdone. Then, there's M. T. Suit, who is merely an empty suit walking the office halls spewing corporatese, such as "promising to enhance core competencies by leveraging platforms."Adams says that about 80 percent of his initial ideas come from his 150 million-plus readers. Those worldwide readers are sure to celebrate the humor found in When Body Language Goes Bad, his latest satirical look at the modern workplace.
When Churchill Slaughtered Sheep and Stalin Robbed a Bank: History's Unknown Chapters
by Giles MiltonMore addictive and mind-blowing true tales from history, told by Giles Milton—one of today’s most entertaining and accessible yet always intelligent and illuminating historiansIn When Churchill Slaughtered Sheep and Stalin Robbed a Bank, the second installment in his outrageously entertaining series, History’s Unknown Chapters, Giles Milton shows his customary historical flair as he delves into the little-known stories from history, like when Stalin was actually assassinated with poison by one of his inner circle; the Russian scientist, dubbed the “Red Frankenstein,” who attempted to produce a human-ape hybrid through ethically dubious means; the family who survived thirty-eight days at sea with almost no water or supplies after their ship was destroyed by a killer whale; or the plot that served as a template for 9/11 in which four Algerian terrorists attempted to hijack a plane and fly it into the Eiffel Tower.
When Cloud Became a Cloud
by Rob HodgsonMeet Cloud! Follow along as she moves, transforms, precipitates, and more in this charming and humorous portrayal of the water cycle.The lifecycle of our protagonist, Cloud, is delightfully and sparsely narrated in nine short chapters that follow the stages of the water cycle. Young readers will immediately fall for this wide-eyed puff, and welcome facts along with humor and personality as they bask in the accomplishment of breezing through each chapter.
When Clowns Attack
by Chuck SambuchinoTHEY'RE COMING FOR YOU Coulrophobia--the fear of clowns--is very real and for good reason. You might think these red-nosed jokers are creepy, sure, but certainly not dangerous. You'd be wrong. Clowns never reveal their real names, and dress to obscure their identities. The rules of civilized society don't apply to them (what other stranger could offer candy to children and get away with it?), they have countless places to hide weapons on their person, and their appearance is downright unnatural. Clowns are the scariest people on earth, and the truth is, they are coming for your valuables, your children, and your sanity. In this comprehensive guide to self-protection from clown creepery, petty crime, and violence, Chuck Sambuchino--founder of the anti-clown group Red Nose Alert--delves into the terrifying clown underworld to provide the knowledge you need to know to protect yourself from these seemingly innocuous gagmen, using his proven four-step system: ASSESS, ANALYZE, DEFEND, PROTECT. Included within are instructions on how to defeat a clown in close combat, tips for spotting the plainclothes clown, and tutorials for fully clown-proofing your home against these painted and bewigged warriors. Most importantly, you'll learn what to do when clowns attack... because it's only a matter of time before they do.From the Hardcover edition.
When Comedy Goes Wrong (Comedy & Culture)
by null Christopher J. GilbertWhile conventional wisdom has it that humor embodies a spirit of renewal and humility, a dispirited form of comedy thrives in a media-saturated and politically charged environment.When Comedy Goes Wrong examines how, beginning in the late-twentieth and carrying into the early twenty-first century, a certain comic dispirit found various platforms for disheartening cultural politics. From the calculated follies on talk radio programs like the Rush Limbaugh Show through the charades of "cancel culture" and ultimately to so-called Alt-Right comedy, the transgressions, improprieties, and ego trips endemic to a newfangled comic freedom produced entirely unfunny ways of being. To understand these unfunny ways, Christopher J. Gilbert challenges the prevailing belief in humor's goodness, analyzing radio personalities, meme culture, films, civil unrest, and even the language of ordinary individuals and everyday speech, all to demonstrate what happens when humor becomes humorless. As such, Gilbert imagines a nuanced sense of humor for a tumultuous world.Ultimately, When Comedy Goes Wrong transcends partisanship to explore the uglier parts of American culture, imagining the stakes of doing comedy—and being comical—as a means of survival.