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Who Are You, Calvin Bledsoe?: A Novel
by Brock Clarke“A story in which anything and everything can happen, and mostly does. This is a book of many trips--across oceans, back to the past, and, most profoundly, into the infinite deep space of the human heart. Brock Clarke has given us a wonderful novel that bursts with all the meaty stuff of real life.” —Ben Fountain, author of Billy Lynn’s Long Halftime Walk Calvin Bledsoe’s journey begins with the death of his mother. An internationally known theologian and an expert on all things John Calvin, she had been the dominant force in her son’s existence, so much so that he never left home—even when he married—and, as a result, never grew up.At his mother’s funeral, Calvin is introduced to his aunt Beatrice, a woman he had not even known existed. Beatrice immediately makes it clear to Calvin that she is now in charge of his life, and the first thing she is going to do is whisk him off to Europe with her for a grand adventure.As Calvin and his aunt traverse the continent, it becomes apparent that her clandestine behavior is leading leading him into danger. Facing a menagerie of antiquities thieves, secret agents, religious fanatics, and an ex-wife who is stalking him, Calvin begins to suspect there might be some meaning behind the madness. Maybe he’s not the person he thought he was? Perhaps no one is ever who they appear to be? But there’s little time for soul-searching, as Calvin first has to figure out why he has been kidnapped, why his aunt has disappeared, and who the hell burned down his house in Maine.Powered by pitch-perfect dialogue, lovable characters, and surprising optimism, Who Are You, Calvin Bledsoe? is a modern-day take on Graham Greene’s classic Travels with My Aunt, a novel about grabbing life, and holding on—wherever it may take you.
Who Ate My Book? (Penguin Young Readers, Level 2)
by Tina KüglerSomeone is taking bites out of this book! And we have a feeling a certain mischievous goat has something to do with it...A goat is on the loose and is taking bites out of everything, even pages of this book! Join the fun in this story perfect for early readers
Who Ate the First Oyster?: The Extraordinary People Behind the Greatest Firsts in History
by Cody CassidyWho wore the first pants? Who painted the first masterpiece? Who first rode the horse? Who invented soap? This madcap adventure across ancient history uses everything from modern genetics to archaeology to uncover the geniuses behind these and other world-changing innovations.Who invented the wheel? Who told the first joke? Who drank the first beer? Who was the murderer in the first murder mystery, who was the first surgeon, who sparked the first fire--and most critically, who was the first to brave the slimy, pale oyster?In this book, writer Cody Cassidy digs deep into the latest research to uncover the untold stories of some of these incredible innovators (or participants in lucky accidents). With a sharp sense of humor and boundless enthusiasm for the wonders of our ancient ancestors, Who Ate the First Oyster? profiles the perpetrators of the greatest firsts and catastrophes of prehistory, using the lives of individuals to provide a glimpse into ancient cultures, show how and why these critical developments occurred, and educate us on a period of time that until recently we've known almost nothing about.
Who Ate the First Oyster?: The Extraordinary People Behind the Greatest Firsts in History
by Cody CassidyWho wore the first pants? Who painted the first masterpiece? Who first rode the horse? This madcap adventure across ancient history uses everything from modern genetics to archaeology to uncover the geniuses behind these and other world-changing innovations.In this book, writer Cody Cassidy digs deep into the latest research to uncover the untold stories of some of these incredible innovators (or participants in lucky accidents). With a sharp sense of humor and boundless enthusiasm for the wonders of our ancient ancestors, Who Ate the First Oyster? profiles the perpetrators of the greatest firsts and catastrophes of prehistory, using the lives of individuals to provide a glimpse into ancient cultures to show how and why these critical developments occurred, and educate us on a period of time that until recently we've known almost nothing about.
Who Ate the First Oyster?: The Extraordinary People Behind the Greatest Firsts in History
by Cody CassidyWho wore the first pants? Who painted the first masterpiece? Who first rode the horse? This madcap adventure across ancient history uses everything from modern genetics to archaeology to uncover the geniuses behind these and other world-changing innovations.In this book, writer Cody Cassidy digs deep into the latest research to uncover the untold stories of some of these incredible innovators (or participants in lucky accidents). With a sharp sense of humor and boundless enthusiasm for the wonders of our ancient ancestors, Who Ate the First Oyster? profiles the perpetrators of the greatest firsts and catastrophes of prehistory, using the lives of individuals to provide a glimpse into ancient cultures to show how and why these critical developments occurred, and educate us on a period of time that until recently we've known almost nothing about.(P)2020 Penguin Random House Audio
Who Cut The Cheese?
by Mason BrownWho Cut the Cheese? uses a delightful little fable to encapsulate the fundamental rule of modern American management and the new economy: "Survive change by shifting blame." The fable revolves around two malevolent rats and two spiteful "Punypeople" who find themselves trapped together in a maze, fighting over a dwindling supply of constantly moving cheese. Some characters adapt readily to this treacherous, shifting environment -- blaming the weak and overpowering the helpless. Others perish in horror, praying for death. Read this book and live! Written for all ages, the story can be understood by even the youngest reader: The "maze"is a metaphor for life, and the "cheese" is a metaphor for whatever you desire in life -- be it worldly goods, spiritual well-being, or unspeakable sexual encounters too deviant even for the Internet. The more advanced reader will also understand the secondary message of the book: "Resistance is futile." As soon as change happens, we must accept it immediately or suffer the consequences. This heavy-handed lesson is designed to engender unquestioning obedience to authority, and makes the book an ideal gift for subordinates. Large companies would be well advised to give this book to each and every one of their employees, especially if they are considering a restructuring to bolster shareholder value. Extremely short, even including illustrations, the story takes less than an hour to read, but its unsettling conclusions on the nature of humanity should last a lifetime!
Who Cut the Cheese? (Doctor Proctor's Fart Powder)
by Jo Nesbo“Large helpings of whimsy, humorous black-and-white illustrations, and the occasional fart joke provide plenty of silliness” (Booklist) in the third Doctor Proctor adventure from New York Times bestselling author Jo Nesbø.Nilly, Lisa, and Doctor Proctor are too busy inventing things to watch TV, and everyone says they’re missing out on the hot singing competition. But then Nilly and Lisa notice that their friends and family are acting really weird. And the only people acting weird…are the ones watching TV. What’s going on is WAY bigger than a singing competition. It could mean the end of the world. Or a silent but deadly could save everything! Let ’er rip.
Who Cut the Cheese? A Cultural History of the Fart: A Cultural History of the Fart
by Jim DawsonWe've told you HOW TO SHIT IN THE WOODS. We've taken you UP SHIT CREEK. Now, we dare to ask the eternal question...WHO CUT THE CHEESE? Which is to say, what exactly is a fart? Why do we do it? Why do we hide it when we do it? And why do we find farts so darn funny? A cut above anything else on the subject, this book really lets go and tells all, getting to the bottom of these mysteries. Author Jim sniffs out a load of historical and scientific fart tales, then offers the kind of fun facts you'll be dying to let slip at social occasions, in chapters like "Fart Facts That Aren't Just Hot Air," "Gone with the Wind" (on famous movie farts), and "Le Petomane & the Art of the Fart" (on the most famous windbag in history). From fact to fiction to frivolous flatulence, this book is unquestionably a ripping good read.From the Trade Paperback edition.
Who Do I Think I Am?: Stories of Chola Wishes and Caviar Dreams
by Anjelah Johnson-ReyesThis hilarious and thoughtful memoir from comedy legend Anjelah Johnson-Reyes explores questions of identity, belonging, and her two dreams as a kid: to be an actress and to be a chola. You may know Anjelah Johnson-Reyes for her viral sketch "Nail Salon" (over 100 million views globally) or her beloved MadTV character Bon Qui Qui, but it's her clean humor and hilarious storytelling that make her one of the most successful stand-up comedians and actresses today. With her razor-sharp wit, Anjelah recounts funny stories from her journey—from growing up caught between two worlds (do chips and salsa go with potato salad?) to unexpectedly embracing faith (&“I love Jesus, but I will punch a &‘ho&”) to her many adventures in dating (she may or may not have accepted dates simply for the food). Through it all, Anjelah transforms from a suburban-adjacent kid with Aquanet-drenched hair into a devoted Christian who abstains from drinking and premarital sex, into a mall-famous Oakland Raiders cheerleader, and then an actually famous comedian traveling the world and meeting people from all-walks of life, including Oprah. No biggie. (Huge biggie.) As she travels the world, Anjelah has eye-opening experiences, and she morphs from square, rigid Anjelah into &“Funjelah,&” and learns that she can still ride with Jesus without squashing the other parts of her personality.Anjelah's stories explore subjects such as navigating your racial identity, finding your place in the world, chasing your crazy dreams, embracing the messiness of an evolving faith, and searching for belonging and meaning. Through her journey, Anjelah gets closer to discovering her true identity and encourages readers to have the audacity to dream big.
Who Do You Love? (Love in the City #3)
by J. M. BronstonYoung features editor Eugenia Shaw is thrilled to have a scoop on not one but two major stories for Lady Fair magazine. The last thing Gena expects is to fall in love—with a quirky looking Chinese Crested named Wiley. Or with the fellow Crested lover she keeps accidentally-on-purpose running into in Central Park . . . Unlike Gena’s ambitious and self-centered live-in boyfriend, Paul is a man who appreciates Wiley’s unconventional elegance. And the better they get to know each other, the more it appears that he appreciates Gena, too. Soon she can’t help noticing how much happier and more confident she is when they’re together. She’s even beginning to see a new Gena when she looks in the mirror. But will she be brave enough to rewrite her own next chapter? . . .
Who Hates Whom: Well-Armed Fanatics, Intractable Conflicts, and Various Things Blowing Up A Woefully Incomplete Guide
by Bob HarrisThe daily news gives you events but rarely context. So what do al-Qaeda, North Korea, and Iran really want? Which faction is which in Iraq and who's arming whom? What's the deal with Somalia, Darfur, and Kashmir? Fatah, Hamas, and Hezbollah?Finally, here's Who Hates Whom--a handy, often stunning guide to the world's recent conflicts, from the large and important to the completely absurd.* Which countries are fighting over an uninhabitable glacier with no real strategic value--at an annual cost of half a billion dollars?* Which underreported war has been the deadliest since World War II--worse even than Vietnam--with a continuing aftermath worse than most current conflicts combined?* Which royal family members were respected as gods--until the crown prince machine-gunned the king and queen?* Which country's high school students think the Nazis had a "good side"? Which nation's readers recently put Mein Kampf on the bestseller list? And which other country watches itself with four million security cameras? (Hint: All three are U.S. allies.) Detailed with more than fifty original maps, photographs, and illustrations, Who Hates Whom summarizes more than thirty global hotspots with concise essays, eye-catching diagrams, and (where possible) glimmers of kindness and hope.In which bodies of water can you find most of the world's active pirates? Which dictatorship is bulldozing its own villages? Where exactly are Waziristan, Bangsamoro, Kurdistan, Ituri, Baluchistan, and Jubaland--and how will they affect your life and security? Find out in Who Hates Whom, a seriously amusing look at global humanity--and the lack thereof.From the Trade Paperback edition.
Who Is Carol Burnett? (Who Was?)
by Who HQ David StablerDiscover why comedian and actress Carol Burnett is one of the most iconic entertainers of the twentieth century.From an early age, Carol Burnett developed a love for entertainment, teaching herself to "Tarzan yell" at age nine. After graduating from high school, Burnett studied theater arts and English at UCLA, which only solidified her passion for acting. She fell in love with making audiences laugh, landing her first breakthrough role in Broadway's Once Upon a Mattress. Since then, Burnett went on to perform on programs like The Garry Moore Show and Julie and Carol at Carnegie Hall. In 1967, The Carol Burnett Show was born, breaking ground and earning her several Emmys and Golden Globes. The show ran for eleven seasons. Young readers can learn more about the life and legacy of beloved comedian Carol Burnett in this exciting new book!
Who Is Martha?
by Marjana Gaponenko&“Vividly drawn characters, history, music, birds, love, loneliness, and wisdom . . . A brilliant book, rich and satisfying as a Viennese torte&” (Sy Montgomery, author of Birdology). In this poignant yet rollicking novel, ninety-six-year-old ornithologist Luka Levadski forgoes treatment for lung cancer and moves from Ukraine to Vienna to make a grand exit in a luxury suite at the Hotel Imperial. He reflects on his past while indulging in Viennese cakes and savoring music in a gilded concert hall. Levadski was born in 1914, the same year that Martha—the last of the now-extinct passenger pigeons—died. Levadski too has an acute sense of being the last of a species. He may have devoted much of his existence to studying birds, but now he befriends a hotel butler and another elderly guest, who also doesn&’t have much time left, to share in the lively escapades of his final days. This gloriously written tale is &“a book like a fantastic party, as unshakeable as a child&’s faith [that] astonishes to the very end&” (Neue Zürcher Zeitung).
Who Is Rich?: A Novel
by Matthew KlamEvery summer, a once-sort-of-famous cartoonist named Rich Fischer leaves his wife and two kids behind to teach a class at a weeklong arts conference in a charming New England beachside town. It’s a place where, every year, students—nature poets and driftwood sculptors, widowed seniors, teenagers away from home for the first time—show up to study with an esteemed faculty made up of prizewinning playwrights, actors, and historians; drunkards and perverts; members of the cultural elite; unknown nobodies, midlist somebodies, and legitimate stars—a place where drum circles happen on the beach at midnight, clothing optional. Once more, Rich finds himself, in this seaside paradise, worrying about his family’s nights without him and trying not to think about his book, now out of print, or his future as an illustrator at a glossy magazine about to go under, or his back taxes, or the shameless shenanigans of his colleagues at this summer make-out festival. He can’t decide whether his own very real desire for love and human contact is going to rescue or destroy him. A warped and exhilarating tale of love and lust, Who Is Rich? goes far beyond to address deeper questions: of family, monogamy, the intoxicating beauty of children, and the challenging interdependence of two soulful, sensitive creatures in a confusing domestic alliance.
Who Killed Art Deco?
by Chuck BarrisArt Deco Jr. is heir to a vast fortune, scion of one of America's most powerful men -- Art Deco Sr. -- though by the time we meet him in these pages, Art has fallen into a life of depravity: booze, drugs, you name it. The Deco family is almost too embarrassed to acknowledge him as their own. And by the time Art is found shot dead in his elegant Manhattan apartment, there is a long list of friends and family who may have wanted to kill him -- so the police have their work cut out for them. NYPD detectives Eddie Roach and Jackie Hallerhan are up against a wall when private investigator Jimmy Netts is called on the case by Art Deco Sr. His first case, no less! Netts teams with the NYPD (mostly because he's not exactly sure how to go about solving crimes, much less understands the procedure, and doesn't have a detective's license) to find out who killed poor Art Jr. It could be just about anyone. As a storyteller, the infamous Chuck Barris is the blackest comedian there is. As a satirist, his is a wickedly razor-sharp voice. The deadpan dialogue, investigative snafus, crime drama parody, and cast of hilarious characters in Who Killed Art Deco? bring to mind an unholy combination of Agatha Christie and the Pink Panther, with just a dash of Homicide. This is a dark and delightfully funny book from an equally, delightfully, troubled mind.
Who Killed Mom?
by Steve BurgessMemoir, biography, and outrageous comedy make for a perfect blend in the debut book from acclaimed writer Steve Burgess. Telling the tale of his mother's life and death, and along the way laying bare his own life and struggles, Burgess renders a memorable and deeply moving meditation on life and family.The author's mother, Joan, barely survived her thirteenth birthday: a rare disorder had made it almost impossible for her to swallow food. Her battle to survive this illness was the first in a lifelong sequence of courageous confrontations with her upbringing. As she raised her five children, Joan revealed herself to be a strong and remarkably complex woman. This is her story, but it's also the story of her husband, a charming United Church minister, and their children-including the alarmingly delinquent Steve, who spent much of his adolescence and beyond dropping acid, drinking to excess, and getting in trouble with the law. Which leads him to wonder: was he responsible for his mother's ills and perhaps even her death?Whether he's relating how an ice cream product saved him from a gruesome death on the Trans-Canada, or sizing up the rebranding efforts of a woeful Manitoba motel, or depicting daily life
Who Killed Piet Barol?
by Richard MasonCape Town, 1914. Where a person can be whoever they want to be . . .Former tutor Piet Barol and singer Stacey Meadows are making a splash in colonial Cape Town. Styling themselves as the Vicomte and Vicomtesse de Barol, they have been living by their wits - but as the world drifts towards war, their quest for comfort and riches has brought them close to bankruptcy. With creditors at their heels, their furniture business is imploding and only a major win will save them. Stacey finds the ideal stooge: a mining magnate with a mansion to furnish. Piet enlists two Xhosa men to lead him into the magical forest of Gwadana, in search of a fabled tree. He needs precious wood, but he doesn't want to pay for it. The Natives Land Act has just abolished property rights for the majority of black South Africans, and whole families have been ripped apart. As Piet's charm, charisma and appetite for risk lead him far beyond the safety of the privileged white world, he does not comprehend the enormous price of the lies he has told, nor where they will lead him . . .
Who Killed Piet Barol?
by Richard Mason1913. Piet Barol and Stacey are navigating the turbulence and opportunities of colonial South Africa in a quest for comfort and riches. The Land Act has turfed thousands of black families out of their homes and Piet is appalled by their treatment. But after five years of decadent living, Piet and Stacey are short of cash and in need of wood for the furniture business they have founded. So Piet sets off to pursue a fabled tree, a journey which will take him deep into the homelands of the Xhosa clan who believe that the spirits of their ancestors reside in the magical trees.When charm and wit fail, Piet resorts to darker tactics to get what he wants. And this sets off a chain of events that will put him on a collision course with a power greater than any he knows: Mother Nature.(p) 2016 Orion Publishing Group
Who Let the Gods Out? (Chicken House Novels Ser. #1)
by Maz EvansIn the tradition of Chris Grabenstein, Stuart Gibbs, and Pseudonymous Bosch, a hilarious and action-packed romp involving one ordinary boy and a crazy cast of immortals.Elliot Hooper wants nothing more than a regular life for him and his mom. Then a Constellation of the Zodiac crashes from the sky into a pile of cow dung in front of him, and that wish explodes in a spray of...well...you know.Virgo, a 1,964-year-old girl, is on a routine mission to Earth and ABSOLUTELY FORBIDDEN from interacting with mortals. So of course she takes Elliot along with her. But when an evil daemon named Thanatos escapes to wreak terrible havoc, their routine mission turns not-so-routine. For if Elliot and Virgo don't track down the retired Zeus and the rest of the Olympians and help them catch Thanatos, mortals and gods alike won't be long for this earth.Elliot Hooper's life just got a whole lot more LEGENDARY.
Who Moved My Blackberry?: A Novel
by Lucy KellawayThe television show The Office meets Bridget Jones in a novel set in an office so dysfunctional, it's bound to strike a chord with any nine-to-fiver.A compulsively readable, hilarious novel told through the e-mail messages of Martin Lukes. Martin Lukes is a man who is good at taking credit where it isn't due; a man who works hard at "personal growth" but consistently lets down everyone around him; a man who communicates with his sons by e-mail and fails to notice how smart his wife, Jenny, really is; a man--in short--who loves jargon but totally lacks understanding.
Who Moved My Mouse? A Self-help Book for Cats (Who Don't Need Any Help)
by Dena HarrisWhile cats may hide their self-doubt behind dismissive 'you bore me' and 'I just sprayed the couch' smirks, underneath they are desperate to introduce meaning into their nine lives. This parody, based on classic self-help texts, has the answers. Has your cat been moping around in that patch of sunlight for more than 23 hours a day? Has kitty been overindulging in Whiskas in order to fill the vast emptiness within? While humans have plenty of self-help books to aid us in times of existential crisis, our feline friends have had to go it alone. Until now. This personal-growth book for cats (and their humans) uses the framework of classic self-help tomes to shed light on universal kitty questions. With chapters like 'A Cat's Conversations with God' and 'The Fur Agreements', this guide will empower cats to make the 20 minutes they're awake each day the best 20 minutes of their lives.
Who Moved My Mouse?: A Self-Help Book for Cats (Who Don't Need Any Help)
by Dena HarrisWhile cats may hide their self-doubt behind dismissive 'you bore me' and 'I just sprayed the couch' smirks, underneath they are desperate to introduce meaning into their nine lives. This parody, based on classic self-help texts, has the answers.Has your cat been moping around in that patch of sunlight for more than 23 hours a day? Has kitty been overindulging in Whiskas in order to fill the vast emptiness within? While humans have plenty of self-help books to aid us in times of existential crisis, our feline friends have had to go it alone. Until now. This personal-growth book for cats (and their humans) uses the framework of classic self-help tomes to shed light on universal kitty questions. With chapters like 'A Cat's Conversations with God' and 'The Fur Agreements', this guide will empower cats to make the 20 minutes they're awake each day the best 20 minutes of their lives.
Who Moved My Soap? The CEO's Guide to Surviving in Prison
by Andy BorowitzThey threw the book at Madoff. Now here's the book he needs. While many books are offered for the CEO who aims to survive the cutthroat competition of the corporate jungle, not a single one offers to help those same CEOs when the law catches up with them. That is, until now. This book offers valuable advice for those executives who have cooked the books, and now find themselves paying the price. Borowitz covers all aspects of prison life, from exit strategies (prison-break tips) to ways of keeping the business acumen sharp (how to make the Warden your most valuable employee) to prison cell feng shui and even self-defense (how to use this book as a deadly weapon). Convicted corporate executives should look at this time spent in prison as an opportunity, rather than a disadvantage. New business contacts can be established, new management strategies tested-time can even be spent working on the golf game so it says sharp for ten, twenty, however many years. Direct from Bernie Madoff's cellmate,Who Moved My Soap? The CEO's Guide to Surviving in Prison is loaded with helpful tips, including: Complete Corporate-Speak/Prison Slang; Glossary; How to earn $$$ making vanity license plates; Trophy wives, and how to avoid becoming one; How to avoid getting back-stabbed literally. Don't forget, Who Moved My Soap? will be both small enough to fit in the pocket of your prison uniform, but also thick enough to hollow out and hide cigarettes in! Who Moved My Soap? is a must read for any white collar criminal. CEOs headed to the Big House will now have something to read to help them pass the time. It's also a must read for those of us who were fleeced by them.
Who Needs Mr Darcy?: heart-warming and hilarious, this is Lydia Bennet's story
by Jean BurnettPERFECT FOR FANS OF NETFLIX SENSATION BRIDGERTON AND JANE AUSTEN. This is the story of Lydia Bennet and her exploits in Regency London . . .Mr Wickham turned out to be a disappointing husband in many ways, the most notable being his early demise on the battlefields of Waterloo. And so Lydia Wickham, nee Bennet, still not twenty and ever-full of an enterprising spirit, must make her fortune independently. A lesser woman, without Lydia's natural ability to flirt uproariously on the dancefloor and cheat seamlessly at the card table, would swoon in the wake of a dashing highwayman, a corrupt banker and even an amorous Royal or two. But on the hunt for a marriage that will make her rich, there's nothing that Lydia won't turn her hand to . . .Taking in London, Paris and Brighton, Who Needs Mr Darcy? details the charming, lively and somewhat dastardly further exploits of the youngest Bennet sister. Pride and Prejudice this isn't, and Mr Darcy certainly won't be rescuing her this time . . .'High-spirited, great fun and full of racket Georgian atmosphere' DAILY MAIL'The plot romps along in this funny and charming novel . . . a perfect book to curl up with as the evenings draw in' BRISTOL MAGAZINEReaders love WHO NEEDS MR DARCY?:'Perfectly pitched . . . Highly recommended''Fun and fast-paced. Loved it!''Gives the black sheep of the Bennet family her own chance to shine''A refreshing, fun and exciting adventure'
Who Ordered This Truckload of Dung?
by Ajahn BrahmThe 108 pieces in the international bestseller Who Ordered This Truckload of Dung? offer thoughtful commentary on everything from love and commitment to fear and pain. Drawing from his own life experience, as well as traditional Buddhist folk tales, author Ajahn Brahm uses over thirty years of spiritual growth as a monk to spin delightful tales that can be enjoyed in silence or read aloud to friends and family. Featuring titles such as "The Two-Finger Smile" and "The Worm and His Lovely Pile of Dung," these wry and witty stories provide playful, pithy takes on the basic building blocks of everyday life. Suitable for children, adults, and anyone in between, this eloquent volume wraps insight and inspiration inside of a good old yarn.