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You Only Call When You're in Trouble: A Novel
by Stephen McCauley“I don’t think I will find a book I love more this year.”—Jane Green, New York Times bestselling author“Funny, poignant, joyous, explosive, but most of all affirming of our connections to one another. You Only Call When You're in Trouble is a book to cherish. A book that loves you back. What more could you want, my gosh? Read it!”—Andrew Sean Greer, Pulitzer Prize-winning author of Less Is LostIs it ever okay to stop caring for others and start living for yourself?After a lifetime of taking care of his impossible but irresistible sister and his cherished niece, Tom is ready to put himself first. An architect specializing in tiny houses, he finally has an opportunity to build his masterpiece—“his last shot at leaving a footprint on the dying planet.” Assuming, that is, he can stick to his resolution to keep the demands of his needy family at bay. Naturally, that’s when his phone rings. His niece, Cecily—the real love of Tom’s life, as his boyfriend reminded him when moving out—is embroiled in a Title IX investigation at the college where she teaches that threatens her career and relationship. And after decades of lying, his sister wants him to help her tell Cecily the real identity of her father. Tom does what he’s always done—answers the call. Thus begins a journey that will change everyone’s life and demonstrate the beauty or dysfunction (or both?) of the ties that bind families together and sometimes strangle them. Warm, funny, and deeply moving, You Only Call When You’re in Trouble is an unforgettable showcase for Stephen McCauley’s distinctive voice and unique ability to create complex characters that jump off the page and straight into your heart.
You Read to Me, I'll Read to You: Very Short Stories to Read Together
by Michael Emberley Mary Ann HobermanHere's a book With something new - You read to me! I'll read to you! We'll read each page To one another - You'll read one side, I the other. But who will read - Now guess this riddle - When the words are In the middle? The answer's easy! Plain as pie! We'll read together, You and I.
[you] Ruined It for Everyone!: 101 People Who Screwed Things Up for the Rest of Us
by Matthew VincentEnergy sources are massively depleted. The government is wasteful and incompetent. The economy is imploding, the environment is toxic, and international terrorism threatens our day-to-day lives. And gum sucks. It just sucks. Who is responsible? Who made our world so dangerous, so unlivable, so stupid?Matthew Vincent is unafraid to name names. Who's to blame for the three-ounce rule on airplanes? Who came up with the bright idea of branding every single sports stadium? Who made curling an Olympic event? Which pope made celibacy mandatory? Who invented daylight saving time? (Who doesn't hate daylight saving time?)Here's a book that'll tell you who invented every unnecessary, annoying gadget that plagues modern life and haunts your dreams. It's a book to keep in your bathroom for perusal before you end up having to drink out of your toilet bowl because there's no potable water left in your hemisphere. Here's a book that'll tell you who ruined it for everyone.
You Say Tomato, I Say Shut Up: A Love Story
by Annabelle Gurwitch Jeff KahnIn this hilarious and ultimately moving memoir, comedians and real-life married couple Annabelle Gurwitch and Jeff Kahn prove that in marriage, all you need is love—and a healthy dose of complaining, codependence, and pinot noir. After thirteen years of being married, Annabelle and Jeff have found &“We&’re just not that into us.&” Instead of giving up, they&’ve held their relationship together by ignoring conventional wisdom and fostering a lack of intimacy, by using parenting as a competitive sport, and by dropping out of couples therapy. The he-said/she-said chronicle of their intense but loving marriage includes an unsentimental account of the medical odyssey that their family embarked upon after their infant son was diagnosed with VACTERL, a very rare series of birth defects. Annabelle and Jeff&’s unforgivingly raw, uproariously funny story is sure to strike both laughter and terror in the hearts of all couples (not to mention every single man or woman who is contemplating the connubial state). Serving up equal parts sincerity and cynicism, You Say Tomato, I Say Shut Up is a laugh-out-loud must-read for everyone who has come to realize that being &“in love&” can only get you so far. On CohabitationHe says: &“Within days of Annabelle&’s arrival, I became very aware that she demanded solitude and had the housekeeping habits of a feral animal.&”She says: &“The guy had some sort of nudity radar. When I would take my clothes off for even a second, Jeff would be in front of me cheering as if he&’d scored box seats at Fenway Park.&” On SexHe says: &“I want to have sex every day, but Annabelle only wants to do it once a week. So we compromise: we have sex once a week.&”She says: &“Jeff says talking about money before you have sex is a turnoff, but it&’s only a turnoff if you&’re talking about not having money. Talking about money before you have sex when you have money is actually a turn-on.&” On PregnancyHe says: &“For God&’s sake, all I wanted to do was have sex without a condom for a little while; now we were moments from bringing a new life into the world!&”She says: &“My ass was expanding so fast it was like a Starbucks franchise. On every corner of my ass there was a new branch of ass opening up.&”
You Should Sit Down for This: A Memoir about Life, Wine, and Cookies
by Tamera Mowry-HousleyA lighthearted and supremely entertaining memoir, You Should Sit Down for This is like spending the afternoon sharing tea, fresh baked cookies, and conversation with Tamera Mowry-Housley, the fun-loving, wisdom-sharing girlfriend we all need in our lives (always ready to top off your wine!). Most of us know Tamera Mowry-Housley as a beloved TV star—one half of the memorable duo on the hit show Sister, Sister and co-host of the FOX talk show The Real. Tamera&’s spunky Sister, Sister character stole the hearts of millions, but the transition in the public eye from teen-girl star to grown woman with a family and thriving career wasn&’t easy. Being raised in Hawaii as an army brat instilled in her the discipline needed to succeed and conquer her dreams, but she felt secluded and sheltered, and wondered if living on her own terms would ever be her reality. Then, she decided it would. Tamera stopped letting other people define her, tapped into her faith, and tossed away negativity to hone her own happiness and create a unique path forward for herself. In this pink book of quirky advice and funny stories, she encourages everyone to do the same. In a book that celebrates cookies and the juicy parts of life, Tamera will leave you feeling liberated and motivated to embrace the highs and lows of growing up. Tamera shares heartfelt stories about exiling herself from the world of beauty pageants, the pressures of being a teenage star, her struggle with rejection, the craziness of dating later in life, the challenges of balancing family and career, and why it&’s okay for women to hide out in their closets when they just need a few minutes of peace. Tamera doesn&’t shy away from the tough experiences, hilarious missteps, and big lessons it took to build a thriving career and the full life she&’s living today. Our favorite girl next door offers &“Tameraisms&”—bite-sized pieces of wisdom to empower other women to step up to life&’s unexpected turns and surprises and make it all work. You Should Sit Down for This is a much-needed reminder of the magic that can happen when we open our minds and hearts to become the very best versions of ourselves.
You Smell Dead #1
by Flesh Chris P.Freekin just wants to fit in and have a normal life. The good news is that he's in love with class beauty queen, Lilly. The bad news? He's dead. Not that Freekin's going to let a little thing like mortality get in his way. As a matter of fact, he's going to gather up his courage and ask Lilly out. Now if he can only stop his ears from falling off whenever she's around (it's the decay talking), then maybe he'll be able to hear when she answers him.
You Suck at Cooking: The Absurdly Practical Guide to Sucking Slightly Less at Making Food: A Cookbook
by You Suck at CookingDo you crave food all the time? Do you think you might want to eat again in the future? Do you suck at cooking? Inspired by the wildly popular YouTube channel, these 60+ recipes will help you suck slightly less You already know the creator of the YouTube show You Suck at Cooking by his well-manicured hands and mysterious voice, and now you’ll know him for this equally well-manicured and mysterious tome. It contains more than sixty recipes for beginner cooks and noobs alike, in addition to hundreds of paragraphs and sentences, as well as photos and drawings.You’ll learn to cook with unintimidating ingredients in dishes like Broccoli Cheddar Quiche Cupcake Muffin-Type Things, Eddie’s Roasted Red Pepper Dip (while also learning all about Eddie’s sad, sad life), Jalapeño Chicken, and also other stuff. In addition, there are cooking tips that can be applied not only to the very recipes in this book, but also to recipes outside of this book, and to all other areas of your life (with mixed results). In the end, you just might suck slightly less at cooking.* *Results not guaranteed
You Suck at Drinking
by Matthew LatkiewiczHey--you there with the cheap chardonnay--you think you know how to drink, but this book will gently lead you to the conclusion that you do, indeed, suck at drinking. It’s time to imbibe correctly, and author Matthew Latkiewicz has compiled this helpful, wryly humorous guide to help you navigate any drinking situation and answer any pedantic questions, including: * What’s the difference between a flip, a fizz, and a smash? * What is the official state term for being inebriated in Iowa? * How do you choose the right drink to suit any occasion? And much more! Complete with tons of helpful illustrations and handy graphs, this guide will become indispensable to anyone who no longer wants to. . . suck at drinking.
You Take It From Here
by Pamela RibonJust because you'd give your best friend everything doesn't mean she has to take it. On the heels of a divorce, all Danielle Meyers wants is her annual vacation with sassy, life-long best friend, Smidge--complete with umbrella cocktails by an infinity pool--but instead she's hit with the curveball of a lifetime. Smidge takes Danielle to the middle of nowhere to reveal a diagnosis of terminal cancer, followed by an unusual request: "After I'm gone, I want you to finish the job. Marry my husband. Raise my daughter. I'm gonna teach you to how to be Smidge 2.0." As Danielle wrestles with this major life decision, she finds herself torn between being true to her best friend's wishes and being honest with herself. Parenting issues aside, Smidge's small-town Louisiana world is exactly the one Danielle made sure to escape. Danielle isn't one for playing the social butterfly, or being the center of attention. And when your best friend tries to set you up on a date night with her husband, it might be time to become the bossy one for a change. In the spirit of Beaches and Steel Magnolias, You Take It from Here is an honest, hilarious, and heartbreaking novel that ultimately asks: How much should we sacrifice for the ones we love the most?
You Think It's Easy Being the Tooth Fairy?
by David Slonim Sheri Bell-RehwoldtAll over America, kids are losing their teeth. And who is there to gather them up, leaving coins in their places? The Tooth Fairy, of course! A self-described "action kind of gal" with plenty of attitude, she reveals her secrets at last. Learn about her amazing Tooth-o-Finder. Marvel at her ingenious flying machine. Watch her in action, dodging dogs and cats and gerbils. You Think It's Easy Being the Tooth Fairy? is the essential guide for every kid about to lose a tooth.
You Will Be My Friend
by Peter BrownToday is the day the exuberant Lucy is going to make a new friend! But she finds it's harder than she had thought--she accidentally ruins the giraffe's breakfast and is much too big for the frogs' pond. Just when she's about to give up, an unexpected friend finds her, and loves her just the way she is. This heartwarming story offers a unique and humor-filled spin on the all-important themes of persistence and friendship.
You Will Be My Friend! (nto Reading, Read Aloud Module 1 #2)
by Peter BrownNIMAC-sourced textbook <P><P>Today is the day the exuberant Lucy is going to make a new friend! But she finds it's harder than she had thought--she accidentally ruins the giraffe's breakfast and is much too big for the frogs' pond. Just when she's about to give up, an unexpected friend finds her, and loves her just the way she is. <P><P>This heartwarming story offers a unique and humor-filled spin on the all-important themes of persistence and friendship. <P><P>Lexile Measure: AD510L
You Will Get Through This Night
by Daniel HowellA practical guide to taking control of your mental health for today, tomorrow, and the days after, from the #1 New York Times bestselling author and beloved entertainer. ‘There’s a moment at the end of every day, where the world falls away and you are left alone with your thoughts. A reckoning, when the things you have been pushing to the background, come forward and demand your attention.’ Written by Daniel Howell, in consultation with a qualified psychologist, in an entertaining and personal way from the perspective of someone who has been through it all—this no-nonsense book gives you the tools to understand your mind so you can be in control and really live. Split into three chapters for each stage of the journey: This Night - how to get through your toughest moments and be prepared to face anything. Tomorrow - small steps to change your thoughts and actions with a big impact on your life. The Days After - help to look after yourself in the long term and not just survive, but thrive. You will laugh and learn—but most of all, this book will assure you that even in your darkest times, there is always hope. You will get through this night.
You Wish
by Mandy HubbardKayla McHenry?s sweet sixteen sucks! Her dad left, her grades dropped, and her BFF is dating the boy Kayla?s secretly loved for years. Blowing out her candles, Kayla thinks: I wish my birthday wishes actually came true. Because they never freakin? do. Kayla wakes the next day to a life-sized, bright pink My Little Pony outside her window. Then a year?s supply of gumballs arrives. A boy named Ken with a disturbing resemblance to the doll of the same name stalks her. As the ghosts of Kayla?s wishes-past appear, they take her on a wild ride . . . but they MUST STOP. Because when she was fifteen? She wished Ben Mackenzie would kiss her. And Ben is her best friend?s boyfriend. .
You, with a View
by Jessica Joyce"Jessica Joyce is a new and forever fave!"—Ali Hazelwood, New York Times bestselling author of Love, TheoreticallyOne of Amazon's Best Romances of July!Two high school enemies must reunite for a road trip inspired by their grandparents&’ broken engagement in this electric debut romance. Noelle Shepard is unemployed, living with her parents, and grieving the loss of her beloved grandmother when she discovers decades-old photos of Gram and a smitten man, tucked alongside a love letter. She creates a TikTok to search for the mystery man, which goes viral, and she&’s shocked when his grandson responds—a man who happens to be her high school nemesis, Theo Spencer. Noelle refuses to let Theo&’s annoying accomplishments in adulthood—or his sexy smirk—stand in the way of meeting his grandfather and unlocking the secrets he knew about her gram as a young woman. When she learns that their plans to elope were thwarted, Noelle decides to take the honeymoon road trip they planned but never got to carry out. There&’s a catch, though: Paul, Theo's grandfather, asks to come with her, and he insists that Theo join them. It&’ll be a miracle if they make it through the trip without Noelle throwing Theo out of the moving car—or the bed they end up sharing. As the miles tick by, the tension simmers hotter between them...until she discovers that Theo&’s hiding a secret that could cause their tenuous relationship to end before it can restart.
You Wouldn't Dare: A Novel
by Samantha Markum"Perfect for fans of Nina Moreno, Gilmore Girls, and Sarah Dessen, You Wouldn't Dare will wrap you up in a sun-drenched, salt-scented hug and refuse to let you go." - Amanda Quain, author of Accomplished: A Georgie Darcy NovelA rom com about trying to have the summer of your life before everything changes - only to realize change might be exactly what you need...When Juniper Nash Abreheart kissed Graham Isham for the first time, she had no idea it would nearly be the end of their friendship.More specifically, she had no idea that the terrible, unforgivable thing she did to keep their summer fling a secret wouldn’t just ruin their friendship, but also Graham’s entire life. Now, months since the fallout, Junie and Graham spend most of their time sidestepping conversational landmines on the journey back to normalcy.Junie is sure the strangeness between her and Graham is her biggest problem - until her mom hires Tallulah, her boyfriend’s surly teenage daughter, to work at their family café, and then announces they’ll all be moving in together at the end of the summer. The only bright spot ahead is Junie’s dad’s upcoming visit, just in time for her community theater production. And then poor turnout soon threatens that.But when Junie starts to realize the feelings she swore to take care of last summer have lingered, saving her production and managing her hostile relationship with Tallulah might be the least of her problems. Graham isn’t just off limits - their friendship has been mended to barely withstand a breeze, and the gale force of Junie’s feelings could be just what breaks them.Samantha Markum’s You Wouldn’t Dare is about the risks and triumphs that come with being brave enough to take a chance at what you really want, including love.
You'd Look Better as a Ghost: A Novel
by Joanna Wallace&“Refreshingly original and laugh-out-loud funny.&” —Clare Mackintosh, New York Times bestselling author of The Last PartyA comic thriller following the trials and tribulations of Claire, a part-time serial killer, who is keen to keep her favorite hobby a secret—despite the efforts of a determined blackmailerThe night after her father's funeral, Claire meets Lucas in a bar. Lucas doesn't know it, but it's not a chance meeting. One thoughtless mistyped email has put him in the crosshairs of an extremely put-out serial killer. But before they make eye contact, before Claire lets him buy her a drink—even before she takes him home and carves him up into little pieces—something about that night is very wrong. Because someone is watching Claire. Someone who is about to discover her murderous little hobby.The thing is, it's not sensible to tangle with a part-time serial killer, even one who is distracted by attending a weekly bereavement support group and trying to get her art career off the ground. Will Claire finish off her blackmailer before her pursuer reveals all? Let the games begin . . .
You'll Always Have Tara (A Riches to Romance Tale #2)
by Leah Marie BrownA spoiled Southern belle loses her lavish lifestyle—and finds an unexpected new beginning . . . Tara Maxwell seems to have been born under a lucky star, enjoying a life of leisure in beautiful, historic Charleston, South Carolina. But luck, and family fortunes, have a way of running out. Suddenly Tara is left with only one place to turn—her late aunt’s country home in north-west Ireland. The catch: to claim her inheritance Tara must agree to live in Castle Tásúildun for three months. With two other potential heirs. And choose one to be co-owner of the estate. Tara sees right through her aunt’s matchmaking scheme, and she’s not willing to share Castle Tásúildun with anyone. If charm doesn’t get rid of her rivals, she’ll find some other way to drive Aidan Gallagher and Rhys Burroughes away. But as God is her witness, both men are infernally stubborn. Aidan, once her carefree childhood friend, is now an army veteran desperate for the peace the castle offers. Rhys, a smooth-talking businessman, plans to preserve the ramshackle property by transforming it into a luxury hotel. Tara, for the first time, is realizing that frankly, she does give a damn—about others’ happiness as well as her own. But is she ready to open her home—not to mention her heart—to the possibility of an epic adventure?
You'll Be Mine: Green Mountain Novella 4.5 (Green Mountain)
by Marie ForceThe popular series from the New York Times bestselling author and creator of the beloved McCarthys of Gansett Island and thrilling Fatal series continues in this a special novella in the Green Mountain series. Fans of Bella Andre, Jill Shalvis and Kristen Proby will fall madly in love with the Abbotts and the heartwarming, sexy romance of the Green Mountain series.A wedding on Butler Mountain... After a whirlwind romance that began suede-boot deep in Vermont mud season, Will Abbott and Cameron Murphy are ready to tie the knot - as long as family, friends and a love-struck moose don't get in the way.***Originally published in the ASK ME WHY? anthology***For more spellbinding Green Mountain romance, check out the whole series: Your Love Is All I Need, Let Me Hold Your Hand, I Saw You Standing There, And I Love You, You'll Be Mine, It's Love, Only Love and Ain't She Sweet.
You'll Grow Out of It
by Jessi KleinTHE INSTANT NEW YORK TIMES TOP 10 BESTSELLER'Jessi Klein is a brilliant comedic mind and this book is a perfect reflection of that. It's like having a glass of wine with the best friend you wish you had' -Amy SchumerAs both a tomboy and a late bloomer, comedian Jessi Klein grew up feeling more like an outsider than a participant in the rites of modern femininity.In YOU'LL GROW OUT OF IT, Klein offers-through an incisive collection of real-life stories-a relentlessly funny yet poignant take on a variety of topics she has experienced along her strange journey to womanhood and beyond. These include her "transformation from Pippi Longstocking-esque tomboy to are-you-a-lesbian-or-what tom man," attempting to find watchable porn, and identifying the difference between being called 'ma'am' and 'miss' ('Miss sounds like you weigh ninety-nine pounds').Raw, relatable, and consistently hilarious, YOU'LL GROW OUT OF IT is a one-of-a-kind book by a singular and irresistible comic voice.
You'll Grow Out of It
by Jessi KleinTHE INSTANT NEW YORK TIMES TOP 10 BESTSELLER'Jessi Klein is a brilliant comedic mind and this book is a perfect reflection of that. It's like having a glass of wine with the best friend you wish you had' - Amy SchumerAs both a tomboy and a late bloomer, comedian Jessi Klein grew up feeling more like an outsider than a participant in the rites of modern femininity.In YOU'LL GROW OUT OF IT, Klein offers-through an incisive collection of real-life stories-a relentlessly funny yet poignant take on a variety of topics she has experienced along her strange journey to womanhood and beyond. These include her "transformation from Pippi Longstocking-esque tomboy to are-you-a-lesbian-or-what tom man," attempting to find watchable porn, and identifying the difference between being called 'ma'am' and 'miss' ('Miss sounds like you weigh ninety-nine pounds').Raw, relatable, and consistently hilarious, YOU'LL GROW OUT OF IT is a one-of-a-kind book by a singular and irresistible comic voice.(P)2016 Hachette Audio
You'll Grow Out of It
by Jessi Klein<P>YOU'LL GROW OUT OF IT hilariously, and candidly, explores the journey of the twenty-first century woman. As both a tomboy and a late bloomer, comedian Jessi Klein grew up feeling more like an outsider than a participant in the rites of modern femininity. <P>In YOU'LL GROW OUT OF IT, Klein offers-through an incisive collection of real-life stories-a relentlessly funny yet poignant take on a variety of topics she has experienced along her strange journey to womanhood and beyond. These include her "transformation from Pippi Longstocking-esque tomboy to are-you-a-lesbian-or-what tom man," attempting to find watchable porn, and identifying the difference between being called "ma'am" and "miss" ("Miss sounds like you weigh ninety-nine pounds"). <P>Raw, relatable, and consistently hilarious, YOU'LL GROW OUT OF IT is a one-of-a-kind book by a singular and irresistible comic voice. <P><b>A New York Times Bestseller</b>
You'll Lose the Baby Weight
by Dawn MeehanYou'll Lose the Baby Weight is a humorous look at pregnancy and childbirth. The author shares the parts about pregnancy that your doctor doesn't tell you--like how many times you are asked to pee whether you want to or not, from figuring out if you're pregnant by peeing on a pee stick to every time you go in for your doctor visit. And then there is the time when you are not allowed to pee but are bursting to when you're five months pregnant and have to drink thirty-two ounces of water for your ultrasound--and it feels like you've drank fifty-five gallons. As she shares stories from her own six pregnancies and births and those of her friends, Dawn cues readers into the important things they need to know, like how they should order their epidural as soon as they see a pink line on the pregnancy test, the unexpected changes your body goes through, and the fact that they will never again sleep through the night uninterrupted. This book even offers advice for fathers-to-be, including a list of things not to do in the delivery room if they don't want a bedpan thrown at their heads.With such chapters as "I'm Not a Doctor; I Just Play One on TV" and "Morning Sickness: It Isn't Just for Breakfast Anymore," each chapter opens with a list of tips--some serious and some not--including things not to be suckered into buying for your baby and the essentials that you really do need. This hilarious book takes readers through nine months of pregnancy and all the accompanying symptoms to labor and delivery and the weeks postpartum. It will have readers doubled over in laughter, as it walks them through pregnancy with sympathetic honesty. While acknowledging that pregnancy is not always easy, the end result of that sweet-smelling, soft baby somehow make it all worth while.
You'll Never Believe What Happened to Lacey: Crazy Stories about Racism
by Amber Ruffin Lacey Lamar*An Indie Next Pick*Writer and performer on Late Night with Seth Meyers Amber Ruffin writes with her sister Lacey Lamar with humor and heart to share absurd anecdotes about everyday experiences of racism. Now a writer and performer on Late Night with Seth Meyers and host of The Amber Ruffin Show, Amber Ruffin lives in New York, where she is no one's First Black Friend and everyone is, as she puts it, "stark raving normal." But Amber's sister Lacey? She's still living in their home state of Nebraska, and trust us, you'll never believe what happened to Lacey.From racist donut shops to strangers putting their whole hand in her hair, from being mistaken for a prostitute to being mistaken for Harriet Tubman, Lacey is a lightning rod for hilariously ridiculous yet all-too-real anecdotes. She's the perfect mix of polite, beautiful, petite, and Black that apparently makes people think "I can say whatever I want to this woman." And now, Amber and Lacey share these entertainingly horrifying stories through their laugh-out-loud sisterly banter. Painfully relatable or shockingly eye-opening (depending on how often you have personally been followed by security at department stores), this book tackles modern-day racism with the perfect balance of levity and gravity.
You'll Never Blue Ball in This Town Again: One Woman's Painfully Funny Quest to Give It Up
by Heather McDonaldNew York Times bestselling author, comedian, and Chelsea Lately writer Heather McDonald’s hilarious true story of finding herself in the predicament of being an unwilling virgin at the age of twenty-seven.Can’t a girl dress like a hooker, dance like a stripper, and kiss like a porn star and still be a nineteen-year-old virgin? You’ll Never Blue Ball in This Town Again is the laugh-out-loud story of an attractive Los Angeles woman who found herself in the predicament of being an unwilling virgin. As an actress, writer, and stand-up comedienne, Heather McDonald passed up ample opportunities to have her V-card revoked by handsome, rich, and sometimes even fabulously famous men, but she could not bring herself to do “it” until well after her friends had been deflowered. As Chelsea Handler so lovingly puts it, “Thank God Heather waited twenty-seven years to lose her virginity or she wouldn’t have any material for this book.” Whether in a backseat, a community pool, or a sports stadium, with a frat boy, a doctor, or an A-list celebrity, Heather McDonald knew how to turn those boys blue. Unlike “putting out,” blue balling might not have paid her rent or landed her free trips to Hawaii, but it did provide her with hilarious stories and adventures in her search for true love—and, ultimately, her very own happy ending. Now, Heather McDonald will never blue ball in this town again.