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A Fiend in Need: Book 2 (Dark Lord #2)
by Jamie ThomsonDirk Lloyd, the Dark Lord trapped in the body of a weedy schoolboy, returns in another darkly hilarious adventure... Brilliantly funny and subversive, this is the Funny Prize-winning Jamie Thomson at his best.Sooz, a 13 yr old girl from Surrey has become the Dark Mistress of Dirk's other worldly kingdom, the Darklands. Thanks to the Ring of Power given to her by Dirk, his minions recognise her as their ruler. Sooz immediately sets about redecorating Dirk's Dark Tower to the taste of a young girl. But Sooz has to face her toughest challenge when an army of fanatical paladins and orcs gather to march against her. Despite their centuries of hostility to each other, they prefer to form an alliance rather than accept Sooz's new regime.And what of Dirk? He continues on slaving away at school, plotting ways to rescue Sooz. Eventually he is able to advise her on life in the Darklands and Sooz is able to hold back the fanatical paladins.
A Fine Madness: Romantic Comedy (Korbel Classic Romance Humorous Series #5)
by Kathleen Korbel Eileen Dreyer"Has all the elements of a good British mystery and a ghost story combined. A jolly good story!" ~Inside RomanceQuinn Rutledge has been hired to remodel historic Hartley Hall into a 5-star hotel.Ian Matthews, a Special Forces officer in the Queen's Protection service, is vetting the hall's security for a secret international meeting, and presents himself to Quinn as a corporate officer checking on her progress.All seems simple enough, until the pair uncover a crazed band of terrorists, a destructive ghost with an odd sense of humor, and an inconvenient attraction to each other.Neither have time for love, and Ian is the embodiment of everything that went wrong with Quinn's first marriage. But Love doesn't care.Publisher's Note: Dive in and enjoy these classic romances from Eileen Dreyer. Amusing, sweet and oh-so romantic in the best way, these timeless tales will leave you feeling good all-over. Fans of humorous contemporary romance by authors such as Sally Thorne, Lauren Blakely, Addison Cole as well as Molly Harper, Sarah Maclean and Emma Chase will not want to miss this enduring and sweet romantic series.KORBEL CLASSICS: HUMOROUS SERIES, in orderThe Ice Cream ManIsn't It Romantic?A Prince of a GuyPrincess and the PeaA Fine MadnessALSO by Eileen Dreyer:Nothing PersonalBrain DeadBad MedicineIf Looks Could KillABOUT EILEEN DREYER:New York Times bestselling author Eileen Dreyer has been inducted into the Romance Writers of America Hall of Fame, nominated for the Anthony Award and is a retired trauma nurse. Also trained in forensic nursing and death investigation, Eileen doesn't see herself actively working in those fields, unless this writing thing doesn't pan out.
A Fine Mess (Over the Top #2)
by Kelly Siskind"You will be hooked from the first page." -- Kelly Elliott, New York Times bestselling author"Crackles with wit and heat!" -- M. O'KeefeSome guys should come with a warning label . . .Sawyer West is Mr. One-Night Stand. He doesn't do relationships or promises or feelings. He's never cared enough to get involved. Until Lily Roberts. She's sweet and shy and sexy as sin, and resisting her is testing his self-control. She believes Sawyer can be a better man, and for the first time in his life, he wants to be. But change isn't easy, and Sawyer would do anything to protect Lily from his past self. Even break his own heart . . .
A Fistful of Fig Newtons
by Jean ShepherdJean Shepherd was one of America's favorite humorists, his most notable achievement being the creation of the indefatigable Ralphie Parker and his quest for a BB gun in the holiday classic A Christmas Story. But he was so much more, a comic Garrison Keillor-like figure whose unique voice transcended the airwaves and affected a whole generation of nostalgic Americans. A Fistful of Fig Newtons is classic Jean Shepherd--sidesplittingly funny and sardonically irreverent. Here are Shepherd's wild and wacky adventures, a dozen truer-than-life tales of college life on the G.I. Bill, of "Kidhood" in Hammond, Indiana, of tailgating on the Jersey Turnpike, and of other familiar defeats and humilations. It is a brilliant comic assessment of American life--all of them delivered in Jean Shepherd's witty, classy, unforgettable style.
A Five-Letter Word for Love: A Novel
by Amy JamesA heartwarming and humorous romance in which an unlikely couple fall in love over Wordle.Twenty-seven-year-old Emily doesn’t have a lot going well in her life right now. She dreams of a creative career but works as a receptionist in an auto shop. She longs for big city life but lives in a small town on Prince Edward Island. She craves a close group of friends but is stuck with irritating, car-obsessed coworkers.What Emily does have is a 300+ day streak on the New York Times Wordle. But one day, with only one guess left and no clue what the answer is, she’s forced to turn to one of her irritating, car-obsessed coworkers, John, for help—and in doing so, realizes that he might not be so irritating after all.As they make their way, word by word, toward a 365-day streak, Emily is drawn into a surprising romance that will take her outside of her comfort zone—and challenge everything she thought she knew about happiness, success, and love.
A Flying Birthday Cake?
by Louis Sachar Amy WummerMarvin and Stuart get to sleep over at Nick Tuffle's house for Nick's birthday. They set out sleeping bags in the Tuffles' backyard. Stuart and Nick fall right to sleep, but Marvin tosses and turns. Then he hears a noise, and something glowing zooms over his head. Is it really a flying birthday cake? Or something else? The next day, a very strange new kid shows up at school. . . .
A Fool's Kabbalah
by Steve SternIn the ruins of postwar Europe, the world's leading expert on the Kabbalah and Jewish mysticism goes on a hair-raising journey to recover sacred books stolen by the Nazis . . .At the end of the Second World War Gershom Scholem, the magisterial scholar of Jewish mysticism, is commissioned by the Hebrew University in what was then British-ruled Palestine to retrieve a lost world. He is sent to sift through the rubble of Europe in search of precious Jewish books stolen by the Nazis or hidden by the Jews themselves in secret places throughout the ravaged continent.The search takes him into ruined cities and alien wastelands. The terrible irony of salvaging books that had outlasted the people for whom they&’d been written leaves Dr. Scholem longing for the kind of magic that had been the merely theoretical subject of his lamplit studies.Steve Stern's A Fool&’s Kabbalah, a novel featuring numerous real-life historic figures, reimagines Gershom Scholem&’s quest and how it sparked in him the desire to realize the legacy of his dear friend, the brilliant philosopher Walter Benjamin.At the heart of that legacy was the idea that humor is an essential tool of redemption. In a parallel narrative, Menke Klepfisch, self-styled jester and incorrigible scamp, attempts to subvert, through his antic behavior, the cruelties of the Nazi occupation of his native village.As Menke&’s efforts collide with the monstrous reality of the Holocaust, we see—in another place and time--evidence that Dr. Scholem, in defiance of his austere reputation, has begun to develop the anarchic characteristics of a clown.A Fool&’s Kabbalah intertwines the stories of these 2 quixotic characters, who, though poles apart, complement one another in their tragicomic struggles to oppose the supreme evil of history, using only the weapons of humor and a little magic.
A Forbidden Desire
by Robyn DonaldA scorching seduction?Jacinta knew as soon as Paul McAlpine opened his front door that she shouldn't stay. Gerard had warned her not to fall for Paul, his cousin, during her visit to Waitapu, New Zealand. But she already had-ten months ago! She'd kept her distance then, determined not to give into the compelling attraction she'd felt for this man. Now she faced spending a long, hot summer in Paul's company. How on earth was she going to deny their mutual, sizzling desire?
A Forbidden Night with the Housekeeper: A Forbidden Night With The Housekeeper / Revelations Of His Runaway Bride (Mills And Boon Modern Ser.)
by Heidi RiceUSA TODAY bestselling author Heidi Rice is heating things up in this contemporary Cinderella romance tale of innocence and forbidden desire!A taste of the forbidden… That has him craving more!Playboy extraordinaire Maxim Duran is the name on everyone’s lips. But the only name on Maxim’s lips is Cara Evans! He can’t believe that housekeeper Cara has inherited his vineyard. But bartering with the English beauty isn’t going to be simple…Innocent Cara has no doubt that Maxim is trouble — and totally off-limits! She definitely isn’t going to hand over her new home to him. But, as their desire explodes into passionate life, Cara has to ask: What does Maxim want? His rightful inheritance…or her!From Harlequin Presents: Escape to exotic locations where passion knows no bounds.
A Forbidden Seduction
by Sara WoodPassion in RebellionThe Colleoni family was bad news for Debbie. Her marriage to their son had turned out to be no marriage at all. Now she was alone, and fighting for her child's inheritance with his commanding and charismatic half brother-Luciano. Obviously she couldn't trust him, but a passionate attraction was flowing between them. She was vulnerable; she was under the disapproving glare of the Colleoni family; this seduction was foolish, taboo and...wildly irresistible!
A Forever Christmas (Forever, Texas #6)
by Marie FerrarellaWhen Gabe Rodriguez took the job of deputy sheriff in the small town of Forever, Texas, he thought he'd be bored. So he's shocked the morning he discovers a car teetering on the edge of a deep ravine with an unconscious woman at the wheel. Gabe makes a daring rescue, but when the woman awakes, her memory is wiped clean.Gabe may call her his Christmas "Angel," but in her eyes, he's the one who is truly heaven-sent. Gabe's given her a whole new life, and she is haunted by the feeling that this is the happiest she's ever been. Though Gabe is trying to help Angel recover her memory, she's willing to leave it all behind her and start fresh with him at her side. But when her past finally catches up to her, Angel could lose everything, including Gabe.
A Forever Kind of Hero (Childfinders, Inc. #2)
by Marie FerrarellaCHILDFINDERS, INC.A DANGEROUS DISTRACTION...She was the last person Garrett Wichita needed in his life. Days away from bringing down a major drug lord-and satisfying a personal vendetta-this federal agent instead found himself dodging Detective Megan Andreini. And because her runaway was last seen with his suspect, they were now partners. Try as he might, Garrett couldn't keep his distance. Megan's fierce protectiveness and their sizzling attraction beckoned this loner to come in out of the cold. But once Garrett saw justice served, could he convince this beautiful, independent woman that she was the only person he needed in his life?When a child is missing and a heart needs mending, it's time to call ChildFinders, Inc.
A Fortune in Waiting (The Fortunes of Texas: The Secret Fortunes #1)
by Michelle MajorFORTUNE ON THE MENU Even in a town as eclectic as Austin, Keaton Fortune Whitfield stands out. With his dreamy British accent and his slate-blue eyes, he has captured the fancy of every red-blooded Texas female in town...except one. Francesca Harriman, his favorite waitress at Lola May's, seems completely immune to his charms. When she's not on her shift, she's too busy studying to pay attention to him-which only makes him want her more. Francesca has been burned before, and she won't let the Londoner melt her heart. What would a brilliant, wealthy architect want with a commoner like her? She's not about to abandon her schooling to become Keaton's catch of the day. Could a hash-slinging waitress really find happiness with a Fortune?
A Fox Found a Box
by Ged AdamsonWhen his radio breaks, a little fox finds that the forest is filled with its own rhythm and music--drip drops and chirp chirps--in this picture book that gently introduces the concept of mindfulness.A little fox is digging for food when--OUCH! What is that?--the fox finds a box! When the fox brings the box home to his animal friends--and turns a funny-looking knob--the box starts to sing, and music fills the forest. Everyone agrees that it feels nice. Day and night, they listen to the box's songs, until, one day, it goes quiet. No matter what they try, they just can't get the box to sing again. The animals stop swishing their tails and flapping their wings.... But, in the silence, the fox hears the drip-drop rhythm of melting icicles and the thump thump of a beaver's tail and comes to realize music is everywhere. The noises of the forest and the animals build into a symphony, until, eventually, everyone joins together in a joyous dance party. From the author of fan favorite Douglas, You Need Glasses!, here is a wonderful celebration of music--and appreciating the little things that have surrounded you all along.
A Fraction of the Whole: A Novel
by Steve ToltzWith rights sold around the world, this irreverent comic adventure spanning three continents is poised to be one of the most talked about fiction débuts of the year. A Fraction of the Wholemarks the arrival of an ambitious new writer who deftly mixes humour, surprise, and astute observations of the human condition to create a novel that entertains, scandalizes, and enlightens. Martin Dean spent his entire life analyzing absolutely everything – from the benefits of suicide to the virtues of strip clubs versus brothels. Now that he’s dead, his son Jasper can fully reflect on the man who raised him in intellectual captivity. As he recollects the extraordinary events that led to his father’s demise, Jasper recounts a boyhood of outrageous schemes and shocking discoveries – about his infamous and long dead criminal uncle, his tortured and mysteriously absent European mother, and Martin’s constant losing battle to make a lasting impression on the world. It’s a story that takes them from the Australian bush to the cafés of bohemian Paris, from the Thai jungle to labyrinths, mental hospitals, and criminal lairs, from the highs of first love to the lows of rejection and failed ambition. The result is an uproarious indictment of the ridiculousness of the modern world and its mores, and the moving, memorable story of a father and son whose spiritual symmetry transcends all their many shortcomings. I spent the next day staring into empty space. I get a lot of joy out of air, and if sunlight hits the floating specs of dust so you see the whirling dance of atoms, so much the better. During the day, Dad breezed in and out of my room and clicked his tongue, which in our family meant: ‘You’re an idiot. ’ In the afternoon, he came back in with a loaded grin. He had a brilliant idea, and couldn’t wait to tell me about it. It had suddenly occurred to him to throw me out of the house, and what did I think of his brainwave? I told him I was concerned about him eating all his meals alone because the clinking of cutlery on a plate echoing through an empty house is one of the top five depressing noises of all time. --fromA Fraction of the Whole
A Freudian Slip Is When You Say One Thing but Mean Your Mother: 879 Funny, Funky, Hip, and Hilarious Puns
by Gary BlakeEveryone delights in wordplay! When there's a sale on tennis balls, it's first come, first serve. Condoms should be used on every conceivable occasion. Why does the Pope travel so much? Because he's a roamin' Catholic. What is purple and 5,000 miles long? The Grape Wall of China! O-pun the door to 1,001 goodies that will have you howling or groaning, but certainly--like the surgery patient--in stitches.
A Friend of the Family
by Marcia WillettThe beloved author of First Friends returns to the intwined relationships, loves, and rivalries of Devon in this “captivating comedy of manners” (Booklist).In A Friend of the Family, Marcia Willett returns to beloved characters Kate Webster and Cass Wivenhoe and the story that began with First Friends. Yet it is one of their friends, Felicity Mainwaring, who takes center stage.Everyone knows Felicity is a happily married woman—that is, married to her husband and happily dallying with her paramour George. When Felicity is widowed, everyone expects George to pop the question. And he does. But his intended bride is not Felicity. With her usual generous helping of tears and laughter, Marcia Willett again provides her fans with a treat to be savored.“This sequel to First Friends . . . makes for engrossing reading.” —Publishers WeeklyFirst published in the UK as Thea’s Parrot
A Friendly Town That's Almost Always by the Ocean! (Secrets of Topsea #1)
by Kir Fox M. Shelley CoatsWelcome to Topsea, the strangest place you'll ever visit. In this town, the coves are bottomless and the pier has no end in sight. There's a high tide and a low tide... and a vanishing tide. Dogs are a myth, but mermaids are totally real. And seaweed is the main ingredient in every meal-watch out, it might just start chewing you back!New kid Davy definitely thinks Topsea is strange. His mom keeps saying they'll get used to life in their new town-it's just the way things are on the coast! But after his first day at Topsea School, Davy finds himself wondering: Why is his locker all the way at the bottom of the school swimming pool? Why can't anyone remember his name? (It's Davy!) And why does everyone act like all of this is normal?!Through newspaper articles, stories, surveys, notifications, and more, follow Davy and the rest of Ms. Grimalkin's fifth grade class through the weird world of Topsea. (Whatever you do, don't make eye contact with the rubber ducks.)
A Funeral in the Bathroom
by Kalli Dakos Mark BeechMy teacher's pretty slick, has a hundred teaching tricks.Even in the bathroom stalls, she hangs poetry on the walls.And while I'm there all alone, I can't help but read a poem.From "Gross" and "Flushophobic" to "There's a Sock in the Toilet," these poems will have kids laughing all the way to "The Bathroom Dance."
A Funny Thing About Love
by The Estate of Rebecca FarnworthThe funny thing about love is that just when you think you've got it sorted, it turns round and bites you on the behind.Which is exactly what's happened to Carmen Miller.Her ex husband's girlfriend is pregnant, her career as a comedy agent is going down the pan, she's made a fool of herself with fellow agent Will Hunter, a man she's fancied for ages, and to cap it all she has to move out of her flat. Surely things can't get any worse. Moving down to Brighton to write the TV comedy series that she's always dreamed about, Carmen meets the divine Daniel. A man so gorgeous, she doesn't even mind that he's got long hair. It seems that Carmen's life is on the up again.Until, that is... love bites again.Looks like Carmen's back where she started. But could it be that love isn't the problem? Maybe she's just been choosing the wrong men.
A Funny Thing Happened After School . . .
by Davide CaliIt's a race to do homework—in space! But first, there's a spaceship jam. Then there's the moon detour, the Mars alien exploration, and a stop on the gravity-defying International Space Station. And that's just the beginning! Henry and Ali want to get their homework done—they really do! But how are they supposed to study the solar system when they seem to be swept up in an endless series of interstellar surprises?From Davide Cali and Benjamin Chaud, the author-illustrator team behind I Didn't Do My Homework Because . . ., comes an action-packed, entertaining tale about trying to get your homework done, whether you're in—or out—of this world!
A Funny Thing Happened On The Way: Discover the 1960s trend for buying land on a Greek island and building a house. How hard could it be…?
by Nancy Spain<p>The superb classic memoir from a dazzlingly eccentric and endlessly fascinating author and feminist icon - a woman very much ahead of her time - including her time spent on the glorious island of Skiathos<p> <p>Nancy Spain was one of the most celebrated - and notorious - writers and broadcasters of the 50s and 60s. Witty, controversial and brilliant, she lived openly as a lesbian (sharing a household with her two lovers and their various children) and was frequently litigated against for her newspaper columns - Evelyn Waugh successfully sued her for libel... twice.<p> <p>Nancy Spain had a deep love of the Mediterranean. So it was no surprise when, in the 1960s, she decided to build a place of her own on the Greek island of Skiathos. With an impractical nature surpassed only by her passion for the project, and despite many obstacles, she gloriously succeeded. This classic memoir is infused with all Spain's chaotic brilliance, zest for life and single-minded pursuit of a life worth living.<p>
A Funny Thing Happened On The Way: Discover the 1960s trend for buying land on a Greek island and building a house. How hard could it be…?
by Nancy SpainThe superb classic memoir from a dazzlingly eccentric and endlessly fascinating author and feminist icon - a woman very much ahead of her time - including her time spent on the glorious island of Skiathos'A happy, hilarious book' Daily ExpressNancy Spain was one of the most celebrated - and notorious - writers and broadcasters of the 50s and 60s. Witty, controversial and brilliant, she lived openly as a lesbian (sharing a household with her two lovers and their various children) and was frequently litigated against for her newspaper columns - Evelyn Waugh successfully sued her for libel... twice.Nancy Spain had a deep love of the Mediterranean. So it was no surprise when, in the 1960s, she decided to build a place of her own on the Greek island of Skiathos. With an impractical nature surpassed only by her passion for the project, and despite many obstacles, she gloriously succeeded. This classic memoir is infused with all Spain's chaotic brilliance, zest for life and single-minded pursuit of a life worth living.Perfect for fans of A PLACE IN THE SUN and ESCAPE TO THE COUNTRY'Full of fun, and that zest of intelligence that never left her' Sunday Times
A Funny Thing Happened at the Museum . . .
by Benjamin Chaud Davide CaliThere's more to this museum than meets the eye! This is the wonderfully wacky world of celebrated international author-illustrator team Davide Cali and Benjamin Chaud, the duo behind Junior Library Guild selections I Didn't Do My Homework Because . . . , The Truth About My Unbelievable Summer . . . , and A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to School . . . . Notoriously (and delightfully) unreliable narrator Henry is late to a museum where his class is spending the day. But he has a plan: He'll just catch up in one of the exhibits. That's not possible in these halls! With volcanoes erupting, dinosaurs charging, and secret stairwells lurking, reuniting with his classmates becomes a quest of outrageous proportions. Young readers will revel in this entertaining book's over-the-top antics.
A Funny Thing Happened at the Museum . . .: (funny Children's Books, Educational Picture Books, Adventure Books For Kids ) (A\funny Thing Happened Ser.)
by Benjamin Chaud Davide CaliThere's more to this museum than meets the eye! This is the wonderfully wacky world of celebrated international author-illustrator team Davide Cali and Benjamin Chaud, the duo behind Junior Library Guild selections I Didn't Do My Homework Because . . . , The Truth About My Unbelievable Summer . . . , and A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to School . . . . Notoriously (and delightfully) unreliable narrator Henry is late to a museum where his class is spending the day. But he has a plan: He'll just catch up in one of the exhibits. That's not possible in these halls! With volcanoes erupting, dinosaurs charging, and secret stairwells lurking, reuniting with his classmates becomes a quest of outrageous proportions. Young readers will revel in this entertaining book's over-the-top antics.