- Table View
- List View
Dark Lord 2
by Jamie ThompsonPor una equivocación en el conjuro para regresar a Dirk a las Tierras Oscuras, Sooz, la mejor amiga de Dirk, ha terminado en ese extraño mundo. Gracias al Gran Anillo del Poder, regalo de Dirk, ella se ha convertido en líder del Reino. El lugarteniente de Dirk, el Pavoroso Gargon, el Descuartizador, capitán de las Legiones del Horror y sus ejércitos la reconocen ahora como su soberana. Ser la Dama Oscura, Reina de la Noche y absoluta soberana tiene sus encantos. Ahora Sooz no es tan vulnerable, ni tan débil, ni está tan sola, ahora puede decidir sobre asuntos importantes como redecorar la Torre de Hierro para hacerla más atractiva, más mona, y a su gusto. ¡Cómo le encantaría que Dirk estuviera ahí para verla!Pero Sooz tendrá que vencer retos mayores cuando una armada de orcos y paladines fanáticos se unen para luchar en su contra. A pesar de los siglos de hostilidad entre ellos, prefieren formar una alianza a aceptar el nuevo régimen.¿Y qué hay de Dirk Loyd, el Señor Oscuro? El no tiene otra opción más que asistir a la escuela, hacer la tarea e imaginar las posibles maneras de rescatar a Sooz. Eventualmente, Dirk encontrará la manera de aconsejarla en las materias de las Tierras Oscuras y Sooz será capaz de controlar la revuelta en su contra. ¡Nada como tener a un buen amigo de tu lado para salvar tu reino!
Dark Lord. + días de instituto
by Jamie ThomsonPosiblemente el diario más divertido y original del mercado. Una ingeniosa fantasía para desternillarse de risa. En el primer libro de su importantísimo diario, Dirk Lloyd, es decir, Dark Lord, fue arrojado a la Tierra por el mago blanco como castigo por ser el demonio más terriblemente malvado e ingenioso de su planeta. Allí conoció a Sooz y Christopher, que han resultado ser unos leales secuaces. En este segundo libro, Sooz ha sufrido un terrible accidente y ha sido transportada a las Tierras Oscuras. Gracias al anillo de poder que le regaló Dirk, se ha convertido en la Señora Oscura, ganándose el respeto de sus súbditos. Así que lo primero que hace Sooz es redecorar la Tenebrosa Torre de Dirk ajustándola al gusto femenino. Pero no todo será tan fácil para Sooz, pues tendrá que enfrentarse a su mayor reto cuando una armada de fanáticos orcos se enfrenten a ella. Pero ¿y en qué lío andará metido Dirk mientras tanto? Pues nuestro Dark Lord sigue esclavizado con las tareas del instituto mientras averigua cómo salvar a su querida amiga Sooz... COMPRAD ESTE LIBRO O SUFRIRÉIS UNO DE ESTOS CASTIGOS:* Ser transformado en un sirviente zombi.* Caer bajo el hechizo de la Flatulencia Incontrolada.LA ELECCIÓN ES VUESTRA? ¡JUO, JO, JO!
Dark Lord. Dies d'instituto
by Jamie ThomsonSALUT, ESQUITX D'HUMÀ! Compra el meu llibre o pateix una d'aquestes opcions: Un temps de detenció a les masmorres de la Perdició, l'entrada a les Carboneres per fer de la teva carn botifarres. TU MATEIX... UAH, HA, HA, HA! ¡El diari malvat d'un autèntic geni (Jo)! Enlloc no trobaràs una obra mestra com aquesta. L'he escrita jo mateix, en Dark Lord, el senyor de la Foscor àlies Dirk Lloyd. El meu enemic número u m'ha enviat al vostre món i m'ha condemnat a viure dins del cos d'un adolescent. Quina humiliació! No serà fàcil acostumar-me a aquest planeta tan complicat: una família, els estudis, els amics, els busca-raons de l'insti, els teletransportadors de veu mòbils, les noies... però tant és, la meva revenja serà atroç... tan bon punt hagi fet els deures! Compra el meu llibre o pateix una d'aquestes opcions:- Un temps de detenció a les Masmorres de la Perdició.- L'entrada a les Carboneres per fer de la teva carn botifarres.' Ser víctima del malefici de la Calvície Sobtada. TU MATEIX... UAH, HA, HA, HA!
Dark Lord. Días de instituto. El diario malvado de un auténtico génio (yo)
by Jamie Thomson¡SALUDOS, INSIGNIFICANTE HUMANO! Comprad este libro o sufriréis condena en las Mazmorras del Destino, si no acabáis en las Pozas de la Metamorfosis convertidos en embutido. ¡La elección es vuestra, juó, jo, jo! Dark Lord, el Señor Oscuro de un belicoso planeta es desterrado y llega a la Tierra. Para su sorpresa, su cuerpo ha cambiado y ahora tiene el aspecto de un adolescente debilucho. Dark Lord lo vive como una terrible venganza de su gran enemigo interplanetario, pero las personas que lo encuentran solo ven a Dirk Lloyd, un adolescente con amnesia y un pequeño trastorno psiquiátrico. Con una nueva familia adoptiva con la que convivir y un instituto al que acudir, este «adolescente» tendrá que compaginar sus actividades de villano interplanetario con sus actividades escolares. ¡No te pierdas su diario! Reseñas:«Imagínate una mezcla de El diario de Greg con El señor de los anillos.Jamie Thomson es un verdadero genio de la fantasía cómica.»Megan Larkin, Usborne Publishing «Muy divertido y disparatado [...] una idea brillante.»Bookseller «Elegido Libro Infantil de la Semana por este periódico, es sin duda muy divertido y está basado en una idea muy ingeniosa.»The Sunday Times «Uno de los libros juveniles más originales del año.»Daily Express
Dark Lord: Headmaster of Doom
by Jamie ThomsonDirk Lloyd, the Dark Lord trapped in the boy of a weedy schoolboy, returns in a darkly hilarious adventure set in the most ghoulish school you'll encounter this side of the Darklands ...Fourth in the brilliant series that began with the Roald Dahl Funny Prize-winning DARK LORD: THE TEENAGE YEARS, also chosen as one of the Sunday Times's 100 Modern Children Classics.Perfect for fans of Philip Reeve and David Walliams.
Dark Lord: The Early Years
by Jamie ThomsonEvil Dark Lord tries to recover his dignity, his power, and his lands when an arch-foe transports him to a small town, into the body of a thirteen-year-old boy.
Dark Spirits: Historical Mystery (Daisy Gumm Majesty Mystery #7)
by Alice DuncanThe Ku Klux Klan has opened a chapter in Daisy Gumm Majesty's home town of Pasadena, California. Worse, Klan members are harassing Joseph Jackson, the gatekeeper for Daisy's best client, Mrs. Pinkerton.When Mrs. Pinkerton also becomes a target of vicious pranks, Daisy tries to get Detective Sam Rotondo, her new leading man, involved.Sam isn't thrilled. Worse, the bodies are piling up, and now he needs Daisy's help speaking to some of the Klan's victims.That makes Daisy a target, forcing Sam to redouble his efforts and keep Daisy from doing in the Klan with a zinc bucket and a baseball bat.PRAISE for THE DAISY GUMM MAJESTY MYSTERIES "Well plotted with a band of whimsical characters and genuine humor... as comforting as a warm mug of cocoa on a blustery day." ~Diane Morasco, RT Book Reviews"Cozy fans will find [Daisy's] simple, sweet, budding relationship with Sam refreshingly free of artifice." ~Publishers WeeklyTHE DAISY GUMM MAJESTY MYSTERIES, in series orderStrong SpiritsFine SpiritsHigh SpiritsHungry SpiritsGenteel SpiritsAncient SpiritsDark SpiritsSpirits OnstageUnsettled SpiritsBruised SpiritsSpirits UnitedSpirits UnearthedShaken Spirits
Dark War
by Tim WaggonerMeet Matt Richter. Zombie. PI. From his arrival at Nekropolis, Matt has found himself embroiled in disputes with the city's vampire lords, shapeshifters, golems and other monstrosities. Nothing has prepared him for the Dark War.
Dark War
by Tim WaggonerMeet Matt Richter. Zombie. PI.From his arrival at Nekropolis, Matt has found himself embroiled in disputes with the city's vampire lords, shapeshifters, golems and other monstrosities.Nothing has prepared him for the Dark War.File Under: Urban Fantasy [ Turf | Fang Gangs | Endurance | Dead Streets ]From the Paperback edition.
Dark War
by Tim WaggonerMeet Matt Richter. Zombie. PI.From his arrival at Nekropolis, Matt has found himself embroiled in disputes with the city's vampire lords, shapeshifters, golems and other monstrosities.Nothing has prepared him for the Dark War.File Under: Urban Fantasy [ Turf | Fang Gangs | Endurance | Dead Streets ]From the Paperback edition.
Dark Waters (The Milt Kovak Mysteries #10)
by Susan Rogers Cooper&“Characters and dialogue as American as apple pie, a keep-&’em-guessing plot, and laugh-aloud humor. A downright good read.&” —Booklist When Oklahoma sheriff Milt Kovak wins a seven-day cruise for four to Puerto Rico, he takes his family—wife Jean and son Johnny Mac, plus Johnny Mac&’s best friend, Early Rollins. It&’s spring break and the ship is running over with children—and they really are running, everywhere. It&’s complete chaos, but things are about to get even worse when Johnny Mac and Early are caught stealing. The boys confess that they were put up to it by an older boy named Joshua—who is soon found dead on the top deck. And with two full days of sailing ahead—plus word of trouble back home in Prophesy County—Milt and his wife must team up with the ship&’s security officer to try to find the killer . . . &“One of today&’s finest mystery writers.&” —Carolyn Hart
Dark and Stormy Rides Again: The Best from the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest
by Scott RiceThe Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest, named in honor of the Victorian literary has-been Edward Bulwer-Lytton, is the world-famous competition that seeks to find the most atrocious opening sentence to a hypothetical lousy novel. Dark and Stormy Rides Again proves that there are still committed writers out there plumbing their inner souls for truly bad writing. Choice entries include: * "There was considerable consternation among the cats in the coliseum when it was learned that the tigers were taking the lion's share of the prophets." * "Those alarm things that make a real loud honking kind of noise were going off as Captain James Hurley "stared at the screen that showed him the stuff that was outside in space while he sat in the chair that the captain sits in, and slowly reached for the control panel for the thing that makes the ship go real fast."
Darke: Book One: Magyk, Book Two: Flyte, Book Three: Physik, Book Four: Queste, Book Five: Syren, Book Six: Darke, Book Seven: Fyre, The Magykal Papers, The Darke Toad (Septimus Heap #6)
by Angie Sage Mark ZugIn the sixth book of the Magykal series, Alther Mella has been Banished, a Darke Domaine engulfs the Castle, and a Darke dragon is on the loose. Septimus Heap must use all of his skills to save the Castle and the Wizard Tower from destruction: He must enter the Darke. But he cannot do this alone. With the help of Jenna, Alther Mella, Marcellus Pye, and Septimus's estranged brother, Simon Heap, Septimus and Marcia Overstrand battle the spreading Darkenesse. Will Septimus succeed in protecting his Magykal world? Written with Angie Sage's characteristic humor, Septimus Heap, Book Six: Darke is a compelling fantasy adventure filled with surprises, thrills, and laugh-out-loud moments. Readers will revel in the action-packed story as they realize the wisdom of Magyk-that all things are meant to be part of a living whole.
Darkmans: A Novel
by Nicola Barker“Hilarious and erudite, spooky and unconventional, Darkmans is a dazzling achievement.” — Washington PostShortlisted for the Man Booker Prize, Darkmans is an exhilarating, extraordinary examination of the ways in which history can play jokes on us all... If History is just a sick joke which keeps on repeating itself, then who exactly might be telling it, and why? Could it be John Scogin, Edward IV's infamous court jester, whose favorite pastime was to burn people alive—for a laugh? Or could it be Andrew Boarde, Henry VIII's physician, who kindly wrote John Scogin's biography? Or could it be a tiny Kurd called Gaffar whose days are blighted by an unspeakable terror of–uh–salad? Or a beautiful, bulimic harpy with ridiculously weak bones? Or a man who guards Beckley Woods with a Samurai sword and a pregnant terrier?Darkmans is a very modern book, set in Ashford [a ridiculously modern town], about two very old-fashioned subjects: love and jealousy. It's also a book about invasion, obsession, displacement and possession, about comedy, art, prescription drugs and chiropody. And the main character? The past, which creeps up on the present and whispers something quite dark—quite unspeakable—into its ear.The third of Nicola Barker's narratives of the Thames Gateway, Darkmans is an epic novel of startling originality.
Darling Annie
by Raine CantrellActs of charity quickly lead to a flirtation with the deadliest of sins in DARLING ANNIE, from national bestselling romance author Raine Cantrell. Kellian York has big plans for the brothel he&’s inherited in Loving, Texas. Too bad that just days after his arrival the Legion for Decency has burned it to the ground, citing their mission to rid the town of drinking, gambling, and &“loose women.&” Set on vengeance, Kellian targets the spinster leader, Annie Muldoon, never expecting that the beautiful young woman would let Kellian and his girls move into her boarding house. Believing she has a responsibility to protect and redeem the women formerly in Kellian&’s employ, Annie soon realizes she&’s made a terrible mistake inviting them, and especially Kellian, into her home. Unsure whether he&’s trying to torture her or seduce her, Kellian&’s striking presence is beginning to rouse the passionate nature she&’s tried to hide. Annie decides to take her fate, and Kellian&’s, into her own hands, and learns a few tricks of the trade from her boarders, before turning the tables on Kellian. Will the saint redeem the sinner? Or the sinner seduce the saint?
Darling, I Love You: Poems from the Hearts of Our Glorious Mutts and All Our Animal Friends
by Daniel LadinskyA heartwarming collection of short verse celebrating our beloved pets and the wonder of life Daniel Ladinsky is the internationally acclaimed poet known for his inspired, contemporary renderings of works by Hafiz, Rumi, St. Francis of Assisi, and poet-saints East and West. Patrick McDonnell is the venerated author, artist, and creator of the beloved MUTTS comic strip. In Darling, I Love You! these two artists have collaborated for the first time to create a delightful, universal collection of sweet, welcome-to-the-moment poems about the essential places animals and wonder hold in our lives and in our hearts, accompanied by line drawings of the illustrious MUTTS characters that readers have come to know and love.&“Pet owners will chuckle knowingly about the way the speakers shift between simple observations and deeper statements . . . that remind us why humans need animals as much as they need us.&” —The Washington Post
Darn It!: Traditional Female Skills That Everyone Should Know
by WilliamsCan you sew on a button? Or wrap a present? Worry not—Darn It! is here to help you master such tasks with ease to expand your repertoire and skill set, making you a more well-rounded, twenty-first-century man. Easy to navigate, this instruction manual helps you take matters into your own hands. There’s no shame in knitting your own scarf or hat, especially if it means achieving complete self-reliance. The tips and instructions in this book will teach you how to: Iron a shirt Clean your silverware Apply a bandage Use a sewing machine Make an omelet And much more! Beautifully illustrated, with clear and concise step-by-step instructions, this essential handbook is the ultimate survival guide for the modern man.
Darwin Awards
by Wendy NorthcuttAll new tales from the shallow end of the gene pool Named in honour of Charles Darwin, the father of evolution, The Darwin Awards pays homage to those who improve our gene pool . . . by removing themselves from it. Most of us know instinctively that igniting a blasting cap in our mouth is a recipe for disaster. Darwin Award winners do not. Most of us have basic sound judgement that eliminates the need for NO SMOKING signs at ammo dumps. Darwin Award winners do not. Whether it's thallium-snorting soldiers, head-butting motorcyclists, or hatchet-wielding men who mistake a body part for a chicken neck, there's no shortage of creative Darwin Award winners. Filled with 150 original tales of evolution in action, science essays by guest writers, and a spoof research paper supporting Intelligent Design, The Darwin Awards IV demonstrates that when it comes to common sense, natural selection still has a long way to go.
Das Albtraum-Spiel: Ein LitRPG Roman (Das Albtraum-Spiel #1)
by Raymond JohnsonZweites Kapitel Charakterverstümmelung Ramzan hielt den Atem an und wartete mit resignierter Angst. Er fühlte sich, als wäre er in den elektrischen Stuhl geschnallt und wartete darauf, dass der Schalter umgelegt wurde. Jede Sekunde jetzt und 2.200 Volt würden durch seinen Körper gehen. "Was für ein köstlicher Gedanke", kam eine Stimme aus der Dunkelheit. Es war fast männlich, aber leicht feminin, aromatisiert durch einen amerikanischen Akzent. Nicht russisch, das war gut. Die Amerikaner waren schwach und voller Sympathie. "Ja, das ist eine wunderbare Idee. Lass uns das tun!" Er schwor, er hörte gedämpft, als ob die Person, die das Gefühl ausdrückte, Handschuhe trug. Ramzans Körper wurde von einem Stromstoß geplagt, der durch jeden Nerv schoss. Sein Kiefer ballte sich so stark, dass er sich durch die Zunge biss. Er wollte schreien, aber er konnte seinen Mund nicht öffnen. Der Schmerz stürzte über ihn wie eine Flutwelle brennenden Öls. Durch all das kam eine geschlechtsneutrale Stimme. Sie nehmen 10 Gesundheitspunkte von elektrischen Schäden. Sie nehmen 10 Gesundheitspunkte von elektrischen Schäden. Sie nehmen 10 Gesundheitspunkte von elektrischen Schäden. Sie nehmen 10 Gesundheitspunkte von elektrischen Schäden. Sie nehmen 5 Gesundheitspunkte von Bissschäden. Sie bluten. Du verlierst jede Sekunde zwei Gesundheitspunkte, bis die Blutung aufhört. Sie haben 1.952 von 2.000 verbleibenden Gesundheitspunkten. Der Schaden durch die Elektrizität und das Bluten dauerte eine Ewigkeit an, bis die Stimme aufhörte, den Schaden, den er erlitt, detailliert zu beschreiben, und sagte: Sie haben 3 von 2.000 verbleibenden Gesundheitspunkten.
Das Geschenk
by Julie HodgsonJoe ist der größte Weihnachtsfan. Er liebt es über alles und freut sich schon sehr, die Feiertag mit seiner Frau Beth zusammen mit Mince Pies, heißer Schokolade, Lachen und Kuscheln zu verbringen und „Ist das Leben nicht schön“ im Fernsehen anzuschauen. Beth allerdings hat in diesem Jahr eine ganz andere Idee. Sie möchte lieber eine grauenhafte Zeit haben … oder warum sonst hätte sie ihre Mutter eingeladen, das dämonische Schwiegermonster aus der Hölle, das alles Weihnachtliche hasst? Noch mehr als Weihnachten hasst die gefürchtete Schwiegermutter eigentlich nur … Joe. Aber glücklicherweise hat Joe einen Verbündeten in seinem Kampf gegen das kaugummikauende Monster mit orangen Haaren: den Weihnachtsmann aus dem Einkaufszentrum, der ein Geheimnis zu haben scheint. Dieser überlebensgroße Santa Claus überreicht Joe ein magisches Geschenk, das – so sein Versprechen – das Problem verschwinden lassen kann. Aber das unverdächtig aussehende Päckchen gibt den Anstoß für ein Abenteuer, das Joe niemals vergessen soll ...
Das Wort
by K. Matthew Simon DehneSehen Sie dieses Buch als Herausforderung. Eine Herausforderung an Ihren Geist. Eine Herausforderung, das bissigste Review zu schreiben, das Ihnen einfällt. Eine Herausforderung an Sie selbst, sich die Frage zu stellen "Warum zum Teufel habe ich das gekauft?". Die Antwort liegt im Inneren. In einer Welt in der Menschen darauf bestehen, dass Größe nicht alles ist, gibt es Das Wort.
Dashed: A Margaret Dashwood Novel
by Amanda QuainIn this contemporary update of Sense and Sensibility, Margaret Dashwood is setting sail on an adventurous summer cruise—unless love sinks her first.Margaret Dashwood lives her life according to plan, and it involves absolutely zero heartbreak, thank you very much. Five years ago, love tore her family apart, and since then, she’s kept her own heart as safe as possible. It hasn’t been easy, especially since her sister Marianne—the world’s biggest romantic—has conveniently forgotten that love burned her so badly she literally almost died. So when their oldest sister Elinor invites Margaret along for a Marianne-free summer cruise, she can’t wait to soak up every scheduled moment with sensible Elinor before heading off to college. But just before they set sail, a newly-single Marianne announces that she’s crashing their vacation. Suddenly, Margaret’s itineraries are thrown overboard, and the ship’s cabin feels even tinier with her sister wailing about her breakup from the bottom bunk. The only solution? Find Marianne a dose of love to tide her over until they reach land.With help from Elinor, her husband Edward, and Gabe—a distractingly handsome new friend on the crew—Margaret sets out to create a series of elaborate fake dates that will give Marianne the spontaneously curated summer romance of a lifetime. But between a chaotic sister, the growing storm of feelings between Margaret and Gabe, and an actual storm on the horizon, this summer is destined to go off course. Margaret will have to decide what’s more important—following the plan, or following her heart.
Dashing Through the Snowbirds: A Meg Langslow Mystery (Meg Langslow Mysteries #32)
by Donna AndrewsDashing Through the Snowbirds is the next merry installment of Donna Andrews's New York Times bestselling Meg Langslow mystery series.Christmas in Caerphilly is wonderful! Unless you’re a Canadian whose inconsiderate boss is forcing you to spend the holiday there, far from family and friends, with only a slim chance of a white Christmas. Meg already has her hands full, trying to make the season festive for the dozen programmers who are staying with her and Michael while working on a rush project with her brother’s software company. At least it’s an interesting project, since the Canadian company is doing forensic genealogy and DNA analysis.When the inconsiderate boss is found murdered, there are too many suspects. Even before their Christmas in exile, his own employees had plenty of motives, and the growing number of people suing the company for faulty DNA analysis and invasion of their genetic privacy include at least one notorious murderer. Can Meg crack the case in time to keep the Yuletide bright?
Date Him or Dump Him?: The No-Nonsense Relationship Quiz
by Melissa HeckscherIs he Mr. Right? Or Mr. Right Now? Answer the questions and follow the pages to find out: • How much do you two have to talk about? • Not much. Turn to page 115. • Anything and everything. Turn to page 22. • We don’t really talk at all; we’re too busy making out. Turn to page 25. With simple, straightforward advice, Date Him or Dump Him? will tell it like it is!
Date Me
by Kristin BealeA comic collection that tells stories of the unique, awkward, and downright funny dating and social interactions that happen when you’re in a wheelchair.Dating is hard. Throw in the variable of a wheelchair and the “hard” becomes “almost not worth it.” Kristin Beale shares stories of her crazy family, the unique and often lousy ways people interact with her because of her disability, and her often failed attempts at dating in a wheelchair with a strained, but ongoing determination not to give up. Relatable for many people who have dated in the tweny-first century, Date Me offers a different perspective from a wheelchair user and how to interact with them. With a few extra indiscriminate stories thrown in, Kristin’s stories keep readers entertained as she reveals the struggles and triumphs of living in a wheelchair in today’s world.